The child’s head peeped out, and Carolyn stood ready to catch it. As the baby came out, I saw Carolyn whisper a blessing over the newborn, with its healthy, ruddy glow. At the same time, Willow’s breath grew ragged, and her eyes rolled up in her head.
Déjà vu. I remembered my own birthing struggle. All of a sudden, a bright light shone in front of me, a colossal ball of energy. Sage appeared beside me. “Do you remember that I said time is a Mobius strip? It can cycle around.”
I saw Willow laboring away in the distance.
“You can have another chance if you want,” Sage said.
“Time to do over my mothering?”
“A new opportunity to use the ten rules. Walk into the light if you want to start again.”
I smelled the familiar scent of blood and sweat. I could almost remember the convulsions pushing through me as I had given birth. I could have more years with my precious child. I could use new methods and achieve better outcomes in her life.
Then I heard Mill talking as if from far away. This time the men had stuck around for the birth. “Keep pushing. Stay with us, Willow,” Mill said.
My eyes focused on the family in the delivery scene before me. There were two sets of grandparents in the home: my parents and my in-laws. Mill crouched down beside his wife, while Jas held onto his hand. My daughter looked at the little baby with awe. Her new sibling. I checked all around the room, but not a single eel slithered nearby. However, I did notice a bright angel creature in the corner, watching the new baby adjust to the world.
The infant was covered with stripes of blood and wailing at his harsh arrival. Despite his jarring wails, he was an amazing sight to behold. He had the pug nose of his grandfather and oddly large hands, the capable palms of Mill. When he blinked up at me, his eyes were the arresting color of honey. This was Mill and Willow’s child for sure, and I would not be the one to take the precious mothering experience away from another woman.
I turned my attention to Sage. “No,” I said. “I did my job. I already saw my daughter grow up.” My choice was absolute. I had done my best, and I accepted my attempt, with all its high and low points.
Sage smiled at me. “It is done then.” She flew over to Jas and touched her shoulder. My daughter halted from her enamored gazing of her baby brother, and her eyes registered me. She gave me the sweetest smile and said, “Thank you, Mama.” In the excitement of the new child, no one else in my family heard her, but Jas’ gratitude was enough for me. I blew her kisses, which she caught with her hands and hugged tight to her chest.
Then I turned my back to the light and walked in the opposite direction. I could feel Sage following me, the rustle of feathers comforting in its swishes. I marched forward with confidence, leading the way into a new, unknown territory. I realized I had lived my dragonfly dream and was ready for whatever happened next.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Thank you for reading this book. If you enjoyed it, please leave a kind review online and suggest it to your local library. May you all pursue your fullest dragonfly dreams.
I’m grateful for the multiple online resources I found while exploring Fresno history through photographs and blogs. In particular, I’m indebted to the informative magazine, Fresno County: 150 Years, A Special Publication of The Fresno Bee.
Also, my gratitude goes out to the wonderful Booktrope team. First and foremost, I’m thankful for book manager Amanda Gray, cover designer Greg Simanson, editor Toni Michelle, and proofreader Samantha March. Also, for the lovely executive team at my publisher: Adam Bodendieck, Annie St. John, Emily Clanton, Evie Hutton, Jennifer Gilbert, Jesse James Freeman, Katherine Sears, Paula Marie Coomer, Shari Ryan, Stephanie Konat, and Terry Persun. Special thanks to the rest of the Booktrope community, who’ve been so supportive of my endeavors.
Hugs to my gracious but exacting writers’ group: Christine K., Lisbeth, Robin, Sherry, and Tracey. Thank you also to perceptive beta readers: Chang, Christine S., Ekta, and Soh Ra. Also, a hearty thanks to my excellent street team! Go Team Jen!
Blessings go out to my dad, brother, and extended family. Plus, I’m extremely grateful for my husband Steve, who’s journeyed with me since college and pushed me to write from my heart and complete another layered, multicultural story.
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