Abbot started to argue, but apparently thought the better of it. He led them into one of the narrow buildings and up a flight of stairs. After rapping lightly on one of the doors, he said, “Edith, it’s me. Let me in.”
When the door opened, Hugh and Ned let go of Abbot, shoving him inside. Eleanor followed, Sarah on her heels. Edith Abbot stood there, a look of fear in her eyes. Although cramped, the room seemed clean enough. It served as parlor, bedchamber, and kitchen, and smelled of stale cooking odors. Lili was nowhere in sight, and Eleanor’s heart nearly stopped.
Hugh whispered to Ned briefly, and then spoke kindly to Mrs. Abbot. “Where is Lili, ma’am? We’ve come for her.”
She appeared confused and looked to her husband for an explanation. “Jacob? You said…what’s happened?”
Now Hugh spoke more authoritatively. “Do not consult your husband. You must give me my daughter this instant. If you do not, you may be considered Abbot’s accessory, and you could hang along with him.”
Mrs. Abbot looked at Hugh, then seemed to notice for the first time that Eleanor was present. Eleanor stepped forward, for it was she who knew the woman best. She had commiserated with her, helped her, given her extra money now and then. And she believed Edith Abbot cared for Lili.
“Edith, your husband has endangered you because of his reckless scheme of blackmail. You must give up Lili or risk imprisonment, or worse. You don’t want that to happen, do you? You’re soon to be a mother.”
Edith Abbot’s hand flew to her mouth, and she spun around and made her way to a doorway leading to a second room. In a moment, she emerged carrying the sleeping Lili. After a hesitant glance at Eleanor, she placed the child into Hugh’s outstretched arms.
While Ned kept a close eye on the Abbots, Hugh regarded his daughter with wonder. Lili was slowly waking, and Eleanor feared the child might cry out. But she did not. She seemed to be studying her father as closely as he studied her, her brows knit in concentration. A smile slowly broke over Hugh’s countenance. With his thumb he stroked Lili’s brow and traced the outline of her cheek. He kissed her forehead and murmured to her. “At last we meet, child. I am your papa.” Hugh gave a joyful laugh, then said, “I hope to become well acquainted with you. Oh, what, you’re not too sure about that?”
Eleanor watched for as long as her heart could bear it. Then she whispered to Sarah, and they tiptoed from the room.
“But miss,” Sarah cried when they’d reached the street. “The babe will want you. You’re her mother.”
“Never mind that. We’re going back to the inn. Don’t dawdle.” If she must separate from Lili, better to do it in this way. Her daughter was safe. Lili belonged to Hugh now. To her father. He had the money, the clout, the standing to claim her, and there was nothing Eleanor could do about it. Her parents would prefer it this way. Right now, she simply wished to find her father and tell him they must leave. Ironically, the sun was finally breaking through.
As they neared the inn, she heard a voice calling her name. Hugh. She didn’t want to see him, didn’t wish to speak to him. There was nothing left to say, but it was absurd to try to avoid him. Turning to Sarah, she said, “Go upstairs and find my father. Tell him we must prepare to depart right away.”
“But—”
“Please don’t argue, Sarah. Do as I ask.” The girl nodded and hurried inside. Eleanor wiped at her tear-streaked face with the back of one hand and turned to face Hugh. He was carrying Lili, his face still wearing an awed expression.
“Didn’t you forget someone?” he asked.
Eleanor gazed at him in puzzlement. She couldn’t bear to look at Lili. But Lili looked at her, twisting herself around and holding out her arms. “Mama,” she said. Eleanor took a step back, raising her palms. “Don’t do this, Hugh. It’s cruel, to me and Lili both.”
“You misunderstand, Eleanor.” He held Lili out, and Eleanor had no choice but to gather her daughter into her arms. “Lili belongs with you.”
“But you said you were taking her. Only last night at the inn.”
“I said many idiotic things, too many to count, which I pray you’ll disregard. I was an ass.”
“You’ve changed your mind, then?” Eleanor nuzzled her nose into Lili’s neck, breathing her in, and then fixed her gaze on Hugh.
He smiled sheepishly. “It bears repeating. I was every sort of fool. I’ve had many opportunities on this journey to realize how wrong I’ve been, Eleanor. I’ve seen what kind of mother you are, and I should never have doubted you. The care you took making the doll clothes for Lili. Your despair when you thought the worst.” He smoothed a lock of her damp hair from her face. “And you are familiar with all aspects of Lili’s routine. Of her life. The way she talks and walks. What she plays with. What makes her happy. Everything.”
“Those are the small details mothers know,” she said gently.
“Only the best ones. You were fierce as a wild boar when you confronted Abbot on the ramparts. If you hadn’t ambushed him, he might have escaped.”
She laughed. “A mother’s protective instincts.”
“She’s a beautiful child, Eleanor. She has your eyes.”
“And your everything else.”
“Every time an image of her came to me, she was always a little Eleanor.”
Eleanor, who’d been completely unprepared for this turn of events, said, “What happens now?”
Hugh shrugged. “That is up to you. I would like the privilege of seeing Lili on a regular basis.” Compared to the man who had so boldly led the search for Lili, he seemed unsure of himself. “I hope you’ll trust me with her. And if you’re still set on leaving Haslemere, let it not be at too great a distance.”
“I’ll stay with my parents for a time, until I come to a decision. With the end of the Season, my work is over for the present. And you may see Lili whenever you like.” Eleanor felt her cheeks flush. “You’ve missed nearly two years of her life, after all, and I’m to blame for that.”
“Not entirely. The British Army had something to do with it, too.” He set his hand on Lili’s back, stroking gently. She cocked her head at him, as if wondering what to make of this man. “I assume you wish to be discreet about this?”
“You mean, do I want all of Surrey to know I bore your child out of wedlock?” She gave him a wry smile. “In truth, it was always my parents who worried I would be an outcast. That I would never find a husband. I always cared much more for Lili’s welfare than I did about my own. But until we make some decisions, I suppose it’s best to maintain discretion. For your sake, too. Scandal could ruin your newfound reputation.”
“I’ll worry about that later. We have much to discuss, but this is neither the time nor the place. When we’re home, may I call on you to work out various arrangements?”
“You will always be welcome where Lili is concerned.”
“Your generosity overwhelms me.” Hugh studied her. “No offense, Eleanor, but you look exhausted. We all need a hot meal and a good night’s sleep.”
“I’m not offended.” And then Sir William and Adam came rushing through the door, and everything had to be explained to them, including a few bits Eleanor didn’t know. Ned had taken Abbot off to the magistrate. Mrs. Abbot had packed up Lili’s belongings, which didn’t amount to much, and Ned would bring them when Abbot was safely in the magistrate’s custody.
“What will happen to Mrs. Abbot?” Eleanor asked.
“When I call on you, I’ll tell you what I have in mind. I’d like your opinion.”
Somehow, Eleanor made it through the evening. Dinner in the private parlor, Lili being passed about from father, to uncle, to grandfather. The child grew fretful early, no doubt as weary as the rest of them. After bidding everybody good night, Eleanor rose to retire.
Hugh got to his feet as well. “May I carry her up?” he asked.
“Of course.”
“Let’s go, poppet. Off to dreamland.” Just as Eleanor had known he would, Hugh seemed to have a natural ea
se with Lili, almost as though he’d been present every day since her birth.
In the morning, they left for Surrey.
Chapter Twenty-Four
On the ride back to Surrey, Hugh reflected on all that had transpired the day before. In retrospect, it seemed a miracle they’d found Lili safe. In their inquiries, Hugh and Ned had discovered that Abbot hadn’t found work at the factories, though not from lack of trying. It was sheer happenstance they’d spotted him, and if Eleanor hadn’t intervened on the ramparts, he might have eluded them. He’d seemed to have no real plan for extorting money from them.
Which was why Hugh and Ned had struggled with whether to call in the magistrate. In the end, Hugh had decided they must, albeit reluctantly. He hated leaving Mrs. Abbot pregnant and alone. But Abbot’s crimes simply could not be overlooked. The man was an arsonist and blackmailer, and he’d kidnapped Lili. If his crimes had been against property only…but they had endangered lives, and Hugh couldn’t be sure he would not commit similar crimes again, if the opportunity presented itself.
Ned would remain in Portsmouth this morning until arrangements could be made for Edith Abbot to travel back to Haslemere by mail coach. Hugh had promised to visit her soon. He planned to offer her financial assistance, at least until she remarried or could otherwise find some means to support herself and her child. She had cared for his child for two years, and for that he was grateful.
Seeing Eleanor with Lili had been a revelation. They belonged together. Hugh wasn’t certain what he’d expected, but not the closeness he’d observed. He should have known. Known that a woman like Eleanor would never settle for anything less than a true attachment. He wished for that, too, and she had seemed amenable to it.
But was she—could she ever again be—amenable to a close relationship with him? He loved her, and she had said she loved him. But that was before his rash, reckless accusations. Before he’d threatened to take away her child. Before he’d had time to consider her situation when Lili was born. And he knew the reason he’d been so unwilling to see things from her perspective. The chief reason, in any case.
He’d never gotten over his resentment of Deborah. He had blamed her for every misstep he’d ever taken. And before he’d truly thought things through, he had placed Eleanor in the same category as his mother—women who leave their children. What a fool he’d been.
After reading Deborah’s letters and hearing the truth from Wesley, he was ready to make amends with his mother. More than ready. And he felt strongly that before he could attempt to get back into Eleanor’s good graces, he must make things right with Deborah.
He would never be whole, never be a man Eleanor could truly trust, until he let go of his bitterness.
He and Eleanor would be thrown together often because of Lili. He could only hope to sway her opinion of him once they were more in each other’s company. He wanted her back in his bed, too, and he’d lay money on her wanting that as well. Even when he’d been at his angriest, he’d felt the pull, the attraction to her. Though, until now, he’d resisted acknowledging that to himself. To contemplate life without ever making love to her again was as grim as he could imagine.
The truth was, he wished to marry her. He wanted her by his side every day of their lives.
Forever.
He would make a start. Sometime in the next few days, even before he visited Eleanor and Lili, he would travel up to London and see his mother.
…
A few days later
Once back in Surrey, Eleanor and Lili settled in with her parents. Although her mother was subdued, she’d seemed greatly relieved that no harm had come to her granddaughter and had even been helping with Lili’s care. Eleanor knew they must eventually have a discussion, but for now she simply wanted to make a home for Lili.
Hugh did not come.
That surprised her. She’d expected him the day after they’d arrived home, or bright and early the following day, but so far he’d stayed away. Perhaps he was giving her and Lili time to adjust to a different life.
Since her return from Portsmouth, Eleanor had been trying to envision what the future held for her and Lili. Looking back on the last few years, she realized her life had been ruled in large part by what others wanted, or demanded, of her. No more. From now on, she would make her own decisions regarding herself and her child. She wanted Hugh to be a big part of Lili’s life, but that was the only thing she knew for certain. A daughter needed her father to rely on, as she had done with her own father for her whole life.
With Sir William’s help, she intended to carry through with her plan to leave Surrey and settle somewhere else where she was unknown. Somewhere reasonably close to Haslemere, so Hugh could see Lili regularly. It should not be difficult to establish a dressmaking business, and with the money she earned, she could support herself and Lili. She knew her father would not begrudge her the money, and her mother would probably be just as happy to be rid of them.
Her mother had invented a story to explain Lili’s presence, but Eleanor was quite sure the household knew the truth, and that was all right. They were good people, and they were kind and helpful to Eleanor and loving toward Lili. Eleanor’s mother wanted her to find a nursemaid, but she was not ready for that step yet. When she was gone from this house, she would be occupied with her work. That was soon enough to turn Lili’s care over to somebody else. For now, she was determined to make the most of the early morning kisses and smiles, the games they played, the stories they shared at bedtime. These were the most precious moments in her life.
…
After a busy few days dealing with matters at Longmere, Hugh had sent an express to his mother requesting a meeting with her. He disliked being so formal, but she and Mr. Cochran were often away, and he didn’t want to make a wasted trip. When the time came to leave, however, he found he wasn’t quite ready. He wanted to see Lili first. And yes, he could admit it, Eleanor, too. Perhaps Eleanor most of all. He’d wanted to allow them some time to settle in with her parents, but he missed them both too much to wait any longer.
He walked his mount to the Broxtons’ home and rapped at the front door. Hugh had never been round to the front of the house; in fact, now that he thought about it, he’d never been inside the house, either. The facade was more London than Surrey, stuccoed and ornamented with a good deal of wrought iron.
The butler accepted his card and asked him to wait in the rotunda, and in a moment Eleanor herself came to greet him. She was wearing his favorite blue dress and, in both looks and actions, she seemed like a different woman from the one in Portsmouth. Her step was lively, her demeanor composed. She had the fresh-faced look of the girl he’d first met at his mother’s house party. He watched her come toward him, and God help him, he was smitten all over again. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. Her hair was pinned up, although a few locks had fallen free of the arrangement. Her eyes sparkled, and he realized they’d lost that haunted look. Good God, she was speaking to him, and all he could do was stare.
“Hugh?”
“Eleanor. You look…transformed.” He took her hand and kissed her fingers lightly.
“Thank you. I think you are paying me a compliment.” She laughed. He hadn’t heard that laugh in quite a long time. It was sustenance to a starving man. “Come, we are in the drawing room.”
By “we,” he hoped she meant only herself and Lili. He walked into the room and his daughter, who was playing with bowls that fit one into another, glanced up at him. “Hello, poppet,” Hugh said, striding over to her. He hunkered down on the Turkish carpet and planted a kiss on the top of her head. She smiled, but quickly grew shy, getting up and toddling over to Eleanor. Clutching her mother’s legs, she sneaked a glance at Hugh.
His disappointment must have registered on his face, because Eleanor said, “She’ll grow accustomed to you, don’t worry. I believe children develop a certain shyness at her age.”
Hugh smiled ruefully. “I mistakenly thought she would remember me from
Portsmouth. She wasn’t shy with me there.”
“No, she wasn’t. They are changeable little creatures. Let’s sit down and play with her. She’ll be demanding all your attention in no time.”
Eleanor was right. They played with the bowls and, after a few minutes, Lili was laughing at him when he pretended to fit a larger bowl into a smaller one. When she grew bored with the bowls, he picked her up, and she allowed it. He noticed then that Eleanor had left the room. He walked with Lili to the tall sash windows, and he pointed out various things outside. He took a ridiculous pride in her saying the names of things, as though he’d had something to do with her learning them.
Eleanor breezed back into the room with a maid. “It’s time for Lili to eat. Mary will feed her, and you and I can talk. Is that all right with you?”
“Yes. Excellent.” She was certainly being accommodating. He did want to talk. After Mary and Lili had left the room, she beckoned him to the sofa. In a moment, a footman entered with tea, sandwiches, and Sally Lunns, his favorites.
While they ate, he spoke to her of his plans to help Edith Abbot. “That’s very generous of you, Hugh,” Eleanor said. “In a way, she was Abbot’s victim, just as we were. And I always believed she was genuinely fond of Lili.”
Silence ensued.
“I wanted to speak to you—” he began.
“Please visit Lili whenever—”
They smiled at each other. Hugh wished things were not so awkward between them. Fleetingly, he wondered if she yearned for him as he did for her. “My apologies. I know we have much to discuss, but selfishly, today I need your advice. I’m riding up to London to talk to my mother, and I’m all at sea about what to say to her. Ridiculous for a grown man, I know, but there it is.”
Eleanor had poured the tea and handed him a cup. “Ah. Now I remember. With all the worry and confusion regarding Lili, I barely took note of what you said about her. Letters, and something a footman told you?”
Hugh laughed. “You really weren’t listening, were you?”
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