Samuels grabs Jarred's waist and pulls him across the room towards the door. "Stop."
"He'll die."
"If we stay here, we'll all die. He's beyond help."
"No!" Jarred tries with all his remaining strength to fight against the arms around his body, but even he is weak after so long in confinement like this. "Jayce! Break down the door! Jayce!"
"Shut up and get crawling." Samuels orders as he pushes Jarred forward. "You can't breathe this smoke. I can't drag you anymore."
Jarred slips on the slick floor and the pungent stench of gasoline hits his senses. Oh hell. "Run! The floor is soaked in gas."
"They must have known what we were planning and doused it in fuel so we would die."
* * *
The temple is decorated in pink daisies and purple roses, choices of the groom and bride respectively. People from all around Himmel have joined here to watch the first wedding of someone so highly ranked in over a century. The last one was Velex's wedding, but that marriage was short-lived though it was no one's fault. His wife died to sickness two weeks after their wedding and one week after giving birth to their son. It was tragic for everyone who knew them, but Velex seems to be holding up well enough. Perhaps those six beers helped with that.
Doss nervously glances at Velex who is standing beside him and pats his shoulder. He is feeling a bit better now, aside from his steady panic flowing through him. He has flown through asteroid belts when his fuel was on empty and one engine had stopped working. He's shot down rebel planes after being surrounded and taking multiple hits. He's even removed bullets from his leg with a toothbrush he sharpened with his teeth while landing securely on board a space carrier. He would do all of those things three times over to get out of this. This is by far the most nerve-racking thing he's ever had to do.
When the doors open and the most beautiful woman in the universe smiles at him and him alone from behind her white veil, all the anxiety vanishes. Every step she takes brings her closer to him and lowers his defenses until she joins his side and Doss realizes that he is smiling. Tears are already forming in Katarina's violet eyes, but they only make her more gorgeous. Her pure, unbroken emotionality is more enticing than any other aspect of her being. Doss takes her trembling hands in his as the priest begins to speak.
* * *
"I'm so sorry." Samuels says as he puts a blanket around Jarred's shoulders.
Jarred holds the blanket closely around his body as he watches the flames at the entrance to the cave. He can't look away. He must continue to watch for any sign of Jayce. However, the longer he stays here, the more definitive his fate becomes. It's futile to remain here in hope. So instead, he will remain here as a vigil for Jayce's soul.
An inquisitor takes Jarred's arm to lead him away. "We need to get you inside to have you checked out by the medics."
"No."
"You've been neglected and starved in horrid conditions for two months. Your body is deteriorating. It's a medical emergency at this point."
"Just give me an IV and a hamburger." Jarred says. "I'll solve my medical emergency."
"You're delusional."
Jarred hits the inquisitor's hand away. "Get your motherfucking hands off of me. I just lost the love of my life so back off. I'll come inside when I'm damn good and ready."
The inquisitor mumbles angrily under his breath as he goes back into the tent with the others who have set up camp here.
Jarred's eyes never leave the flames. It was never supposed to end this way. After everything they lived through, how could they end like this? It was simply too much to overcome this time. The hand they were dealt didn't quite hit the mark this time. Maybe it was fate. Jarred rakes through the memories of the past twelve hours. Was there anything he could have done differently, either in planning or execution? His mind is so frazzled right now that there could be something glaringly obvious, but he wouldn't know it.
Speaking of not knowing things, how could he not remember the five digit code for unlocking Jayce's cell? That guilt falls solely on his shoulders. They were so close. If Jarred had only known the code, they could have gotten him out of there and he'd be right here now.
A group of inquisitors in their tan trench coats makes their way back up the hill, followed by a group of citizens. Some carry the confiscated and looted weapons from the fallen soldiers who Jarred has recently discovered are Blood Force agents. So that's Clark's group of blood-thirsty murderers who caused all of this. He vows right here to hunt down every last one of them. Clark's heart will be Jarred's to cut from his body and burn in front of him as he dies. That is the fate awaiting Clark and Gabriel. If they are going to break Jarred's heart, then he will destroy theirs.
Jarred is finished with love. He gave it one try and now that Jayce is gone, he will never fall for that again. If it is going to be this impossible to keep a lover around and this painful when they die, then it's best if he isn't controlled by these emotions. Love is for those who aren't strong enough to make it through life on their own. When Jarred was fourteen, he was weak enough to believe that he needed love and fell into that trap. They had a good run, but everything has to have an end. He doesn't need Jayce anymore.
It's a lie. All of it is a lie. If Jarred can rationalize it, trivialize it, and pretend it wasn't as special as it was, then it won't hurt as much. That plan isn't working. Denial is impossible. It's far past time for praying. Beyond the feelings of loss, the emptiness of not knowing where to go from here plagues him. Jayce was the one who always knew what to do next. So, without a plan, Jarred remains here, watching flames and trying to forget.
* * *
Doss takes the ring from Velex and laughs when he sees Katarina's astonished reaction to the eight carat diamond. He picked it out just for her. He slides it on her finger and wipes away his own tears as the crowd cheers.
The priest holds up his hands above the altar. "By the power invested in my by the Himmel Clergy Preservation Society and the Imperial Galactic Reich, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Vice Admiral Doss, you may kiss your bride."
23
"Does anyone here speak French?"
French? Jarred looks up at this. Not many people still speak French. He stands and goes into the room. "I can understand a good deal of it. Why?"
"We have received what seems to be an emergency transmission on our radio from an unknown source. We've tried communicating with the man, but he can only speak French. It sounds urgent."
"Let me try to speak to him." He knows that voice and that unique accent. That's not just any French. That's Jayce's special brand of French. He picks up the speaker. "Jayce? It's me, Jarred."
"Je suis sorti. Je vais bien. J'ai gagné leur radio."
"No. Jayce, listen to me. I need you to focus and speak English, okay? Just English. We can't understand what you're saying."
"S'il vous plaît venez juste me rencontrer en dehors." Jayce says.
This isn't going to work. Jarred has no patience for this. He has to try something, so he puts together the only French he can think of. "Stop, please! Je ne peux pas vous comprendre."
"Je suis désolé." Jayce says. "I'm okay."
"Where are you?" Jarred asks.
"Outside."
Jarred throws down the speaker and runs outside of the tent.
A very thin and exhausted-looking Jayce smiles and holds up a radio. His face, chest, and arms are streaked with blood, dirt, and gasoline. "Hi, Jarred."
* * *
Doss removes his cuirass and cape before slipping off his boots. That was the craziest thing he never thought he'd do. He smiles at his bride who is lying on the bed beside Abel, looking at her ring. "You can't find diamonds anymore, so take care of that ring, okay?"
"Doss, I can't accept this."
"Why not? Do you not like it?"
She sits up and removes her lace gloves "I love it. It's just . . . how did you afford this?"
"I gave up my wings for you."
"What?"<
br />
Doss sits on the bed next to her and pulls her closer to him. "I had come into some money that I was going to use to replace my wings with platinum ones like I had before, but then I decided to marry you so I spent that money on your ring."
"How much did you spend?"
"I'd rather not say."
"I'm not comfortable with this. Please tell me." Katarina says.
"Twenty million."
"Twenty million? Where did you get that kind of money? Even the president of Paradise only makes one million a year."
"This is Himmel." Doss says. "We might not have diamonds, but we have money. I'll make that back in a few months."
"Does your position as Vice Admiral pay that much?"
"Pay is dependent on the safety risk, amount of training, and success rate of past missions. I'll tell you why I was given that large of a bonus. The missions we go on are rated on a scale from one to ten based on threat level and percentage chance of a safe return. As of yesterday morning, my role in this upcoming operation is rated at a ten."
Katarina's concern flashes across her face. "What does that mean?"
How does he tell her this? They're married now, so he has to tell her the truth, no matter how painful it is. "It means I have less than a ten percent chance of success and less than five percent chance of surviving. Usually level tens are considered suicide missions and are given to those veterans who want to end their lives in battle."
"Why would Velex give you a level ten?"
"Because I'm the only one who has even a slight chance of success." Doss says as he tosses his silver sash on the back of a chair. "I can't give you details, but this mission could save humanity from those who seek to destroy it."
"Can't you run a scenario in the flight simulator?"
"I have."
"Not go well?" She asks.
"Out of two hundred and thirty-five tries, I successfully completed it four times."
"And how many times did you live?"
He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair. "Zero. Everyone else who ran it couldn't get one successful attempt."
"Is it worth it if you die?"
"Absolutely."
* * *
"Let me get a good look at you." Jarred looks over Jayce's body and frowns. "What are all those scars?"
"Where they replaced my bones."
"They replaced your bones?"
He nods his head and sips the water the inquisitors had given him. "With stronger materials so I can use my wings."
"So, you really are an archon now, huh?"
"I can't go into space, though. My purpose was to be used down here. I don't know why."
"That doesn't matter." Jarred says. "I have you now and you're never leaving my side again. I was so afraid that I had lost you. How did you get out of there?"
"Raguel saved me. If it wasn't for him, I would have died. Seems that he doesn't get along very well with Gabriel and Clark."
Jarred gently takes Jayce in his arms and kisses him for the first time in what seems like an eternity. "Je t'aime."
"Moi aussi, je t'aime." Jayce reaches up and touches his wings. "What color are they? What do they look like? No one told me."
"They are the absolute most beautiful shade of dark purple. They look like those amethyst crystals we used to find down here. Remember those?"
He smiles and takes Jarred's hand. "I remember. I also remember that you would trade them to the little orphans for the flowers they picked from the gardens."
"And I'd give those flowers to you because you loved tulips so much."
"Thank you, Jarred."
"For what?"
"Loving me." Jayce whispers softly.
"The same goes for you. You know that."
Samuels, who is looking a great deal better and has changed into his Inquisition uniform, steps into the room. "I need to talk to you, Jarred. Step out here for a minute."
Jarred follows him out of the room and out of earshot. "What is it?"
"I have some very bad news, Jarred."
"No. Don't tell me there's bad news."
"I have to." Samuels says. "I'm so sorry. I know you've worked so hard to get him out of there, but because he is connected to the Paradise security network, we can't take him with us."
"Liar! I can't leave him. There has to be a way."
"If we try to take him outside of the network range, he will die. All of his vital functions are being operated solely by that network."
"I don't believe you." Jarred says.
"It's true. Clark even blocked access to it and changed the pass codes so we can't get in and shut it down. There is a space transport waiting for us to leave and go to Himmel. The Blood Force has been distracted fighting the fires so we have a little window of time to get out. We have to get moving so say your goodbyes."
Not again. Jayce can't show up and then be torn out of Jarred's life again. Everything is so overwhelming that he doesn't know what to do or what is real anymore. He stumbles back into the room.
"What's up, Jarred?" Jayce asks.
"Hey . . . I don't know how to say this."
"I'm not going with you, am I?"
"No. Because you're connected to the network, we can't take you with us." Jarred says as he chokes back tears. "You'll shut down and die."
"They're gonna kill me." Jayce says. "You know that? Clark and Gabriel will find out that I'm alive then they'll kill me or make me their slave."
"I'll come back for you. I swear it on my life. I will not forget about you. I love you, Jayce. Stay strong for me. And if something happens, I'll see you in heaven, mon amour."
Samuels and four other inquisitors motion for Jarred to join them. "Jarred, it's time to leave."
Not yet. He can't leave yet. He holds onto Jayce tighter than he ever has before. He can feel his heart beating against his chest and feel his shallow breathing on his neck. He can't get caught up in this now. He pulls away from Jayce and goes outside to the ship. He steps up the stairs and hears footsteps behind him. Jarred turns around to see Jayce reaching out for him. He takes Jayce's hand and holds tightly as the engines start up. Jayce's cold hand slips from Jarred's grasp as the doors shut, creating a final barrier between them. Jarred places his hand on the glass as he cries out for Jayce. "Jayce! Je t'aime! Je t'aime!"
Jayce only smiles before spreading his amethyst wings as a last farewell. He waves then turns away.
No. Don't go. Jarred pounds on the glass until medics come and drag him off towards the medical bay. "Jayce! Take me back down. I'll stay."
"We can't let you stay down here." One of the medics says. "We're going to destroy the entire planet."
"No! You can't. Jayce is still down there."
"Doesn't matter. We have already evacuated everyone except for the hostile Blood Force and Shadow Spies. There is nothing worth saving. As soon as we land in Himmel, Chancellor Dressler will send his annihilation squad to finish the job."
Jarred takes one last look at the streets where he was forced to suffer for so long. He had finally managed to create a life for himself, only to have it stripped from him and thrown away. He turns his back on it all one last time. "Fuck this city."
24
Velex leans back in the deck chair and puts his feet up on the railing. "How long until they get started? This is boring."
"Give them time. I'm sure Doss is freaking out, as usual." Zach says as he pulls out a bottle of vodka from his backpack and four shot glasses. "What do you think, Blice?"
He lands on the railing and crawls over to the vodka. "Let's just hope Abel doesn't find out we're out here and start barking."
"I'm here!" Kazimir shouts as he comes up the stairs from the beach carrying a large bowl of popcorn and more vodka under his arm, followed by Zerachiel who only has a cup of tea, as always.
"Keep it down, will you?" Velex snaps at him. "For being the founder of the Shadow Spies, you sure aren't quiet."
There is a loud crash from inside the apar
tment and they all start laughing.
"What do you think that was?" Blice asks.
Velex shakes his head. "Who knows? Maybe they broke the bed."
Kazimir peaks through the window. "Or a lamp."
"This is starting to be more entertaining that I thought it would be." Zach says as he pours the vodka into the shot glasses and hands one to each of them. "Okay. Here are the rules. Every time Doss screams, we take a shot. Every time they break something, we take a shot. And if they're still going in three hours, we finish off these other four bottles."
"You're going to kill us, Zach."
"Nope. Do you really think Doss will last that long?"
Kazimir shrugs his shoulders. "Point taken."
"Now, everyone take a shot for whatever just broke." Zach says.
Velex takes a shot and hits the table with his hand. "Pass the popcorn."
There is a muffled scream from inside the apartment.
"Sounds like he's dying." Zerachiel says as he sips his hot tea.
"And now he's becoming a man." Blice says.
"If he survives that long."
Doss screams again then everyone laughs and takes another shot of vodka.
"I'm gonna be so wasted at this rate." Velex says. "What do you think Kat's doing to the poor guy?"
Kazimir fills the shot glasses again. "Use your imagination, Velex. You don't have a woman in your life so I know you pretend a lot."
Velex hits Kazimir's arm. "Bastard."
"So how was it?" Blice asks as he lands on a kernel of popcorn in Zach's hand and begins nibbling on it. "You slept with her."
"He has my sympathies. She's a wild one."
"Hit it and quit it?"
"No, dude. She hits you then you can't walk the next day." Zach says.
Velex laughs and stuffs a handful of popcorn in his mouth. "Doss didn't scream this much during initiation."
"What happens during initiation?" Blice asks.
"The initiates into the military are stripped down to their underwear and blindfolded then tied to the side of a space fighter while everyone takes turns beating the hell out of them with foam swords."
Zach raises an eyebrow. "Foam?"
Paradise Awakened Trilogy Page 39