“Will you tell me when there’s an update?”
“Of course I will.”
We said goodbye because Cole needed to go, the other members of the band were calling him away. He seemed so far away and I hated that I couldn’t be with him.
Dating a super star was difficult. The highs were fantastic, but the lows were very deep. Life would be much simpler with a regular boyfriend, but I wouldn’t change what I had. Cole was the one for me, super star or not.
Chapter Five
I had to postpone the plans I had with my mother. She understood, but she was disappointed. Maybe now she saw a glimpse of how I’d felt for so long. At least I gave her an explanation.
Standing on the sidelines of the Maggie Show, I knew I was where I needed to be. Two Dimension were getting their microphones attached to their shirts while the daytime talk show host, Maggie Sherkof, was all ready to go.
I had been so excited to meet Maggie. She was so cool she didn’t need to use her surname anymore and her talk show was the biggest and best on television. I loved watching her every day, she was funny and smart – a great combination.
Cole had asked me to spend the day with him. Funny enough, the whole band had been behind him. All of them, Dylan, Reed, and Nick, had spoken to me in long discussions about what they were going through. I was happy to be able to listen to them so they had someone they could talk to and trust.
Speaking on the Maggie Show had been Scott’s idea to push back against the allegations Ten Minutes of Winter had made. Just like the band had urged, people were boycotting Two Dimension. Their social media followers had almost halved, their album was diving in the charts, and fans were sending them vicious messages. The whole thing was ugly and it was only getting worse.
Now, with going on the Maggie Show, they could tell their side of the story. They’d had a day to deal with everything, and now it was time to fight back. Like Cole said, they didn’t have much time to waste.
Everything went quiet in the studio as the cameras started rolling. The band looked really hot in their shirts and skinny jeans. They were so much better put together than the other band. They were professionals to the core.
The interview went as expected. The band spoke about their hurt and denied the allegations wholeheartedly. Maggie was sympathetic and made it clear she supported and believed them. The whole thing went so well I was certain they could move on from the situation now and be more positive about things.
It wasn’t until the end that Dylan said something unexpected. “We are officially challenging Ten Minutes of Winter to a sing off. We will host a full concert and let the audience decide which band is the best. If they don’t show, then we will see who’s chicken. So come on and accept our challenge.”
The studio audience went completely silent.
My heart stopped beating.
Maggie loved it. She talked about the challenge for another five minutes before the show ended. It was agonizing waiting for the boys to come off stage so I could ask them what the whole thing was about. Nobody had mentioned it to me beforehand.
“Did you guys plan that?” I demanded once we were in the green room and had some privacy. Scott was with me, just as bewildered as I was. Apparently he hadn’t known about it either.
All the boys stood together, showing us a united front. They all knew about it then, they had schemed it together but failed to run it by their manager first – knowing he wouldn’t let them do it.
Dylan spoke for the group once more. “We had to do something about the band and we were tired of doing nothing. Our best quality is our live performances. We will beat them in a sing off. It’s something we have to do.”
“And you didn’t think to tell me about it?” Scott said. Anger was roiling off him in waves. “This is the stupidest thing you boys have ever done. You could have just killed your careers. Is that what you want?”
“We have to do something. We’re already losing our careers,” Reed defended.
Scott stared them all down. If looks could kill he would have murdered them all before he stomped out and slammed the door behind him. All the boys turned to me for my reaction next.
“You’re going to have to be awesome at the sing off,” I said. There was no point dwelling on what they did. The main thing was that they had laid down the challenge and now the focus had to be on winning. They couldn’t let Ten Minutes of Winter take the crown.
Then it would be all over.
Cole stepped from the line to stand next to me, giving me a grateful hug. “I have an idea for the sing off. A secret weapon that nobody will see coming.”
He had our attention.
The boys nodded at him to continue. Cole hesitated for a few moments more, making me nervous about what he was about to say. “Melrose, you need to sing with us.”
Out of everything that Cole could have said, that definitely wasn’t even on my radar. “No way. I’m not a good enough singer. Are you crazy?”
“I’ve heard you sing, Mel, you are an amazing singer. If we had you in the band, we could take the sing off to the next level. They will sound flat compared with us. We will blow them all away.” He turned to the boys. “She really is that great. Can you imagine how incredible we’d sound with a female voice in the mix? We could include a duet and it will have everyone going crazy for it.”
“It’s not happening,” I insisted. “I will make you lose the sing off. I’m not going to do that. I’m not singing with you guys.”
Cole ignored me. “I have a video of her singing which I’ll show to you. She really is amazing.”
He pulled out his cell phone and played them a video from the time I sung karaoke. I never knew he’d recorded it. The boys seemed to be agreeing with him as they watched, my screechy voice sounded tinny from the device.
I couldn’t take it anymore. Now it was my time to storm out of the room. There was no plan for where I was going but I was so mad I couldn’t stay still any longer. Cole had no right doing that to me, not in front of the whole band.
Footsteps followed me. I didn’t want to be found so I slipped into the first room I came across. It was somebody’s office but they weren’t there. It would do for a few minutes.
Cole entered just a few moments later. “Mel, what’s wrong?”
I didn’t know where to start. Cole and I had never argued before but I guess there was a first for everything. “You shouldn’t have done that in front of everyone! They probably all think I had something to do with it, that I asked you if I could join the band.”
“They don’t think that. The look on your face told them you had no idea.”
“It doesn’t matter, you should have talked to me first before you did that.”
“I thought you’d be excited about it,” Cole said, completely clueless. How could males be so different to females? Their brains worked completely differently.
“I’m not like you! I can’t stand up in front of thousands of people and sing. I’m not that good and I can’t do it!”
“Mel, you are that good. You are better. You will be amazing in the sing off, I know you will be. You can’t keep saying you’re terrible because I have ears and I know differently. The rest of the band think so too.”
“I can’t do it, Cole! Stop saying that.”
“I’ll give you a back rub?”
I shot him a death-stare.
He closed his mouth and looked at me, speechless. I had been stomping around the room, unable to keep still. Now, all I wanted was to run into his arms and make up but it wasn’t that simple. He had gone behind my back and planned this, assuming I would just go along with it.
But I wouldn’t.
What he was asking was just too much. I would give Cole the world but I couldn’t perform in Two Dimension. Especially not in the most important concert of their careers. I wouldn’t be responsible for their downfall, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I lost the sing off for them.
“I’m sorry,” Cole sai
d quietly. “I thought you’d be happy about it.”
“Well, I’m not.”
“Now I know.”
We stood there awkwardly, not really knowing what to say to each other. Fighting was not something we ordinarily did. I wasn’t sure what the deal was now. Did we just ignore each other? Did we try to make up now? Should we try to continue talking when our emotions were so high?
I didn’t know.
But I didn’t feel like talking about it and I was so close to tears that it was difficult holding myself together for much longer. I needed to fall apart a little so I could work out how to put myself back together again. I couldn’t do that with Cole watching and trying to work out what to do.
Reed found us, interrupting the epic silence.
He informed us the band were leaving the studio. We followed him out without saying anything. It was like that for the rest of the day. I did what I had to do, and talked to Cole when I needed to, but that was it. My feelings were hurt and I needed to heal before I could function again.
I went home that night with only an obligatory hug with Cole. It was a relief to be away from him and the band. I never thought I’d ever feel that way, but I never thought Cole would put me in that position either.
Back home, I didn’t tell Dad or Jemma what was going on. I’m sure they noticed something was wrong but they didn’t pry. I wouldn’t have been able to talk about it yet anyway. They wouldn’t understand.
The next day, I groaned in bed when I remembered it was the day when I had rescheduled with my mother. We were to spend the day together, a mother-daughter bonding opportunity. Jemma was annoyed she wasn’t coming with us and I almost invited her at the last minute.
My mother picked me up and was instantly in happy mode. “We are going to have so much fun together today, Mel. So much fun!”
I tried to fake enthusiasm but I’m not sure I pulled it off. At least my mother was used to my quietness, she wouldn’t know there was anything else wrong besides my usual hostility toward her.
The first stop on our fun day was the beauty salon where we sat side by side and received pedicures. Then it was off to the hairdressers where we both toyed with the idea of dramatic changes to our hair styles. I decided on a trim and a slight change, my look leaning toward more sophisticated than before.
It was around that time that I found myself actually enjoying things. We mother rarely shut up, telling me stories of her past and pointing out funny things that I had missed. She was fun to be around and it was not what I had been expecting.
We had lunch at a café downtown, our feet and hairdos sparkling with the pampering. “I know today doesn’t make up for what I did,” Mom started. “But I hope it means we can look forward to knowing each other now.”
“I’ve actually had a lot of fun,” I conceded. “Jemma kept telling me how much she loved spending time with you. To be honest, it was making me a bit jealous.”
“I’m here for both of you.”
“Are you going to move here?”
“I already have.”
I didn’t believe her. My first instinct with Mom was to distrust her. A day at the salon couldn’t repair that. It was one thing visiting us and making us feel good in her company, but it was another to move to town and actually be a mother – both in the good times and the bad. That’s the person we needed, not a fun time parent who only showed up in the good times.
“So you have a job?” I prodded further. The more ties she had to the town, the more I would try to trust her.
“I work part-time so far. It’s all I could find, but I’m looking really hard for something with more hours. I’m sure I’ll find it soon. In the meantime, it has been handy for being able to spend time with my girls.”
“And Dad, don’t forget Dad.” He told me he wasn’t seeing Mom much, but I knew it was a lie. Dad was completely in love with Mom when she left, he wouldn’t just ignore her now when she was trying to make an effort to stay.
“I have seen your father a few times. It has mainly been to discuss you girls. He has been telling me all about your achievements. I’m so very proud of you both.”
“Our achievements are Dad’s achievements too. He’s the one who raised us,” I pointed out. Somehow, I couldn’t let an opportunity to point out her failure go past. I was being snarky but I didn’t know how to stop.
“How about I show you something,” Mom said as we finished our lunch. I threw the wrapper from my burger into the trash and we set off once more.
This time, we walked. Mom led the way and I had no idea where we were going. She wouldn’t tell me no matter how many times I asked. We eventually reached a small apartment building and walked the stairs to the third level.
Mom took out a key and opened the door. We went inside to a small, but neat and tidy, apartment. “This is my home, Mel. I moved here before I contacted your father. I needed to make sure I was settled before I entered your lives.”
I wandered around the living room, seeing photographs from when Jemma and I were only babies. All the family photos were at least ten years old. My mother had knickknacks and personal touches all around the apartment. It wasn’t just for show, it really was her home. She had moved here, intending to make it permanent.
“Home sweet home,” she said.
I stopped to stare at her, really seeing my mom for the first time since she’d returned. I didn’t see the woman who walked out on us and broke our fragile hearts. I saw a woman who was doing her best to make her family whole again.
She wasn’t trying to trick us.
She wasn’t planning on leaving.
She was our mom.
I ran into her arms and hugged her like she really was my mom. I let go of all the hostility and pain, letting it drain from me and vanish into the air so I didn’t have to hold on to it anymore. It was a burden I had worn for too long.
“I love you, Mel,” Mom whispered into my hair.
“I love you too, Mom,” I replied.
For the first time since I was little, it felt like I had a mother again. She was really serious about staying in town and was making a big effort to repair our relationship. Hopefully I wasn’t just getting my hopes up for nothing, hopefully she wouldn’t let me down again.
The next day I was catching up with Dallas and recounting everything that had happened. We were at the mall, hanging out and wandering around while we checked out all the new clothes the stores had to offer. Neither of us were buying anything, looking was just as much fun.
“I’m happy about your mom,” she said.
“Me too. Maybe we’ll get to be as close as you are with your mom one day.”
Dallas rolled her eyes. “You’ll regret that, because she won’t be able to leave you alone then. She’ll have an opinion about your clothes, the boys you like, what you should do with the rest of your life, and everything else.”
I shrugged, because I couldn’t see that as being such a bad thing. Maybe I’d been motherless for too long. Maybe I really wanted to be coddled for a while. Then I could get sick of it and start to whine about her being too pushy.
The conversation moved to Two Dimension as we entered Sears. “If that were me, I would totally have agreed to sing in the band. Who wouldn’t want to sing with them?”
“It was singing in front of thousands of people,” I pointed out. “Plus all the people watching online, it could end up being millions of people. I can’t sing that well.”
“Yes, you can.”
“You’ve never heard me sing.”
Dallas’s mouth dropped open in exaggerated shock. “Excuse me? Fourth grade sleep over at my house. We sung until our voices hurt. Remember?”
Of course I remembered. It was one of the highlights of my childhood. But that didn’t mean anything. “We were just messing around. It wasn’t real singing.”
“Mel, I have known you for as long as I can remember. I’ve heard you sing all the time. When your favorite song comes on the radio, when we’re
getting ready to go out, in choir. You’ve got a voice even I’m jealous of. And that’s saying something because I can sing.”
“Do you really think so?”
“I would never, never, let you go out in public and make a fool out of yourself. I’m your best friend, I would tell you if you had no business being on that stage.” Dallas stared me down, making sure she had my full attention. “Take the opportunity and sing with Two Dimension. Make up with Cole and start believing in yourself.”
Dallas was right about one thing, she wouldn’t let me make a fool out of myself. She would be the first person to save me from myself if she thought I was about to disgrace myself. She was my best friend, the one that always made sure my tags were tucked in, that my makeup wasn’t smudged, and that my skirt wasn’t caught up in my underwear.
I trusted her.
But I still wasn’t sure that singing with Two Dimension was something I had any business in doing.
After scaring me by reminding me how everyone was talking about the big sing off, Dallas and I went home. She dropped me off with another reminder to believe in myself and sped off into the distance.
I wasn’t sure about the whole believing in myself thing but there was something I could do. Not talking to Cole was killing me and I needed to make things right with him. I shouldn’t have yelled at him, even though we were arguing. He’d never raised his voice to me and I should have respected him more.
Sitting on the kitchen table was a massive bunch of flowers. Jemma was just bursting to say something about them. “Where did these come from?”
“They were delivered this morning,” she said eagerly. “They’re from Cole. He’s sorry. What’s he sorry for, Melly?”
I picked up the card, knowing she had already read it. The card simply read ‘I’m sorry, C’. “We had a fight. He’s sorry about the fight. I need to call him.”
“Can I listen?”
“No.” I went into my bedroom, knowing Jemma would press her ear to the door and listen anyway. I left the door open a crack to make it easier for her, there was nothing she couldn’t hear. We didn’t keep secrets from each other.
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