by Shan
A warrant for my arrest? For what?
“Did you once used to date a Mr. Tyrin Walker?” Agent Porter asked.
“Yeah, I . . . that was five or six years ago. So what?” I rebutted, crossing my arms over my chest.
“Did you used to handle books for him? A little accounting work for his car wash?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I would like to speak to my husband, please.”
“He’s going to meet us downtown. If you can turn around and place your hands behind your back, please, Ms. Fortson,” Agent Cryer said to me.
“What am I being arrested for? I need to see the warrant,” I said stubbornly. I refused to put my hands behind my back and be arrested for anything. Yeah, I used to date Tyrin Walker, and yeah, I used to do accounting work for him, but that was many years ago. I was young at the time, only nineteen when I first met him. I walked away from him when things took a turn down a path that I wasn’t interested in traveling.
“Laundering money for Mr. Walker’s drug business back into his car wash,” Agent Porter said as he handed me the warrant.
I took a look at what I was being accused of, and my breath seemed to get caught in my throat. They had me down as doing business with Tyrin as recently as six months ago. I had to wonder if my husband saw this, and if he did, did he read into it in detail? How was I going to explain this shit to him? How was he going to react when he found out that, after all the hell I had given him for hiding his life from me, I had also been hiding mine from him?
Chapter 5
Khian
I parked in front of my homegirl Tangie’s beauty shop and stepped out of the car. My mind was all over the place from dealing with baby mama drama, my shit being missing, and all the goonies I had lost the night before. I felt so muthafuckin’ guilt-ridden. I was supposed to have been there, and I felt like if I had, maybe I could’ve saved a few of my li’l soldiers—especially the homie Cocoa. She was a mother before anything, and her and Tramell was just doing what they had to do to feed their youngin’. Shit wasn’t fair, but we had to play this by ear.
I completely understood why my li’l bro Dae flipped out like he had, but I didn’t get this far by being no dumb nigga. Every move we made had to be calculated, and it just wasn’t smart to do anything based off emotions. Dae was one emotional-ass nigga. That’s why he stayed tipping a bottle or gone off that lean. He let too much shit get to his ass, and the nigga was always acting like he was one bottle away from jumping off a bridge. I ain’t know what was wrong with my youngin’, but he needed to get his shit together. Every time I tried to sit him down to see what was up with him, he always said it was nothing and that I was always in his business. One thing I wasn’t about to let happen was Dae fucking up everything we had worked so hard to build because he was always in his feelings. I was gonna let him make it on this one, though, because since we all grew up together, I knew Tramell and Cocoa were homies.
When I pulled the door open to She is Beauty, Skylarr immediately took off running in my direction. I knew that Tangie could get her right if no one else could. She had my shorty looking a hundred times better, and that brought a smile to my face. Just looking into Skylarr’s eyes made me think about her trifling-ass mama, but I’d be damned if I called that bitch up to see how she was doing. I was sure she was somewhere getting laced, not giving a damn if her daughter was good or not. That was how it was when that monkey was on your back. Not a thing in the world could talk you out of getting your next fix.
“What’s up, bro?” Tangie said as her short ass walked up to me. “You know you can’t be coming all up here looking like that. You got all my clients sweating and shit. Bitches coming all out the shampoo bowl and getting water all over my floor just to get a look.”
I chuckled and looked around, and that was when I saw her. Our eyes met, but she turned away from me like she wasn’t just talking that hot shit the night before. I picked Skylarr up and left Tangie standing there as I made my way over to her. She looked at me, rolled her eyes, and went back to what she was doing on the computer.
“You gonna run everybody off with that stank-ass attitude. I guess you so used to talking to whack-ass niggas you don’t recognize a boss when you see one,” I told her as I reached over the counter and cut off the computer screen. She looked up at me with a frown on her face, and I shook my head, because her damn hair still wasn’t combed.
“You don’t see me working?”
“I don’t give a fuck about you workin’. You oughta be happy a nigga trying to talk to your ugly ass.”
She laughed. “But I’m not happy, and you should’ve took that as your cue last night to not try and talk to me again.”
“So, you do remember a nigga from last night?”
“I do . . . and I see the both of you clean up well.”
“And I see you don’t,” I shot back.
“I wasn’t trying to, but I still impressed you enough for you to take time out your day to bother me again, so that says something.”
“I can tell you ain’t got no nigga—or at least he ain’t hitting it right, because you wouldn’t be talking like that if I was in your life.”
“But you’re not, nor do I want you—”
“Damn, what the hell is going on with you two over here? Khi, you didn’t tell me you knew my cousin Cuba.”
“Cuba, huh?” I said as I bit down on my bottom lip while eyeing her. I could tell she was low-key feeling a nigga no matter how hard she tried to play. They always felt the kid. Shit, I was the streets, and the streets was me. Everybody knew who Killa Khi was, and if they didn’t know, it wasn’t that hard to find out. “Cuba got a smart-ass mouth that I’ma have to fuckin’ tame.”
Tangie laughed. “She just—”
“I don’t know this nigga, Tangie, and he don’t need to know shit about me,” Cuba said, and I had to look at her ass funny.
“Okay, what did I miss?” Tangie asked just as the door chimed and Rue’s bitch ass walked in.
“Hold her right quick,” I told Tangie as I handed Skylarr to her and made my way over to Rue.
“What up, Khi?” Rue said and held his hand out like I was gonna dap his thieving ass up or something.
“Don’t muthafuckin’ ‘what’s up’ me, nigga. You sure is shining right now. What lick you done came up off of?”
“Man, don’t even come at me like that, bruh. You’ll know if I hit you—”
“I’ll come at you how the fuck I wanna come at you!”
“Khi! Khi, please don’t do that shit in here. And don’t forget you got Sky with you.”
“Yeah, nigga, don’t forget you got your daughter with you,” Rue slid in, and it was only seconds before I would have my hands wrapped around his throat, ready to break his fuckin’ neck.
Cats like Rue wasn’t respected in the streets, period. He was the worst kinda nigga, and it was a wonder he was even still alive. He made his living by ganking niggas for shit that they worked hard for, but I guess he knew who to fuck with, ’cause as far as I knew, he had never even breathed in my direction. I didn’t know who had done us in the night before, but seeing Rue walk up in there decked with diamonds when I knew he ain’t work for none of that shit made me snap. I was acting like Dae, and I needed to calm down.
I let Rue go and stepped a couple of feet away from him before I adjusted my suit. Tangie handed me Skylarr, and I reached into my pocket to pull out a few hundred dollars to pay her. I would catch Rue in the streets later. I looked over at Cuba, and she was staring at me while I headed to the exit. I didn’t know why, but seeing her again just made me want her even more. I would tame that feisty-ass attitude and have her calling me daddy in no time. I winked my eye at her, and she hurried and threw her head down like I hadn’t already caught her looking.
“I’ll catch you on the block, Rue,” I told him before I walked out of the shop and headed to my car.
* * *
It was going on seven when I pulled
up to the crib and spotted Briana hanging on the outside of the gate. I shook my head as I pressed down on the remote to open it and drove down the long driveway. Rubbing my hands across my head, I sighed and looked through the rearview mirror at my daughter peacefully sleeping in the back seat. Skylarr hadn’t asked about her mother since I picked her up, and I didn’t even know if it was a good idea if Briana saw her. I didn’t want or need Briana playing no pop-up games in her life with that in-and-out shit. I knew she wasn’t clean and most likely didn’t have any plans on getting that way anytime soon, so until then, she just needed to stay the fuck away.
By the time I pulled Skylarr out of her car seat and made it up to the house, Briana had made it down the driveway. She stood behind me, sniffling, as I stuck the key inside the lock and unlocked the door.
“Are you high?” I asked without even looking over my shoulder at her.
“No, you know I wouldn’t come here if I was,” she sniffed, and I opened the door and walked inside. Briana followed me in the house and closed and locked the door behind her. “Can I put her in her bed?”
“Don’t fuckin’ wake her, Briana.”
“I won’t.”
I handed Skylarr over to her and watched as she took her up the stairs and to her bedroom. Making my way up the stairs as well, I headed to my room and straight to the bathroom. The meeting with Tamar earlier that day went good, and I was glad that I was able to catch up with him while he was in town. He was what I was striving to be. Every time we linked up, he always dropped some jewels on a nigga, letting me know what to do and what not to do in this game. I listened every time he spoke, because he wasn’t that much older than me, and I knew that if he could get in the position he was in, then I could too. We both started from the bottom and had family to look after just the same. He told me how he started out with his brothers by his side, too, and how they were no longer there, but I wasn’t trying to have that be my story. My brothers were my life, and I wished that Dae would take the time out to hear what Tamar was saying. But just like earlier, it always seemed to go in one ear and out the other.
Once I showered and took care of my hygiene, I sat on the bed and rolled me a blunt before I headed back downstairs. Briana was standing in front of the fridge for a few seconds before she pulled out a few things and set them on the counter. As I headed to the back yard to light up the hay, I wondered what kinda shit she was on, since she had brought her ass all the way from the hood to my crib. Briana was a sneaky-ass broad, and I didn’t have no trust left in me to give her. She was up to something. Briana was always up to something.
“Where the hell is Selena, and why the hell does your house look like this? That bitch don’t clean up, and shit, that stove don’t look like it’s ever been used,” Briana said as she stepped outside. I couldn’t help but notice the track marks on her arms as the dim light from the back yard was shining over us. Seeing her like that was sickening, and hell nah, it didn’t make me feel bad for what I did to get money. Shit, dope was gonna get sold whether I was the one to sell it or not.
“Why the fuck are you here?” I asked and took a hit off the hay.
“Because I just want to apologize. I don’t know what happened . . . how I let myself get back on this shit again. But I know that I have done it before, so I know I can quit again. I just need your help. You know I can’t do it without you.”
“You don’t want or need my fuckin’ help. If you wanted to stay clean, then you would have. I really think you do shit like this for my attention. We got a muthafuckin’ daughter to take care of, and you need to focus on her and not some dick that you’ll never have again!”
“It’s not even about that, Khi. You know what I went through as a child! I told you! And it . . . it gets hard for me sometimes. You always have to be so damn hard on me,” Briana cried.
“What you mean? We got a baby to look after, Bri,” I said as I stepped in front of her. “You’re her mother, but if you got a problem being that, then you know it’s nothing for me to replace you.”
“Replace me? Khi, I wish you would have Sky calling that bitch Selena Mama. Don’t play with me like that. You know I can make your life miserable if I choose to.”
I chuckled before I hit the weed and took a step away from her. When Briana made threats like that, I always had visions of myself strangling her or blowing her muthafuckin’ head off. She knew a few secrets that I mistakenly let go before I knew what type of chick she really was. Every now and then when she wanted to flex, she would try and use that shit against me, but it never worked, and it never would. I would body Briana in a heartbeat before I ever let her bring me or my brothers down. She knew that shit, too. I just hoped she never forgot it.
“Go clean yourself up, Bri. Stay the fuck away from Sky until you do. Don’t make me have to hurt you,” I told her as I turned my back to her.
“So, you’re not going to help me, Khi?” she asked as she began to cry again.
“Only somebody that can help you is you. You’ll figure it out when you’re ready.”
“I don’t have any money. How am I supposed to pay for treatment?”
“I don’t fuckin’ know! Like I said, you’ll figure it out. Say good-bye to your daughter, and then get the fuck out.”
“You never loved me, Khi. You never did!”
“Maybe I fuckin’ didn’t, but it’s too late to figure it out now. Go, Bri, because you pissing me off, and I don’t wanna fuck you up no more than you already are.”
“If something happens to me out here, it’s your fault. You just remember that.”
“I ain’t tripping. I’ve lived with worse. Lock the door on your way out.”
Briana stood behind me for a while before she stormed off and went inside the house. I shrugged my shoulders and walked over to sit in the lounge chair next to the pool when I heard the back door open and close again. I thought that Briana had come back to say something else, but when I looked it up, I realized it was Selena’s ass.
Shit, I need to change them locks. The fuck these bitches wanna bother me today for? Damn! I thought as I took a huge toke off my weed.
“Damn, soon as I leave, you have that bitch up in here cooking and cleaning for you and shit,” Selena said, and I sighed.
“You know how Bri is. Anything to make a nigga happy,” I told her as I went to sit down, but she grabbed me.
“I leave to go visit my mom and clear my head, and you got her up in here. Where’s the fuckin’ respect, Khi?”
“Oh my God, what the hell is wrong with y’all today? All these emotional-ass rants and shit. You didn’t get my text?”
“Yes, and that’s why I went to my mom’s house to give you a chance to cool down. We need to talk.”
“Nah, I’m good. I don’t need to calm down. I’ve told you too many muthafuckin’ times about putting your hands on me, and you seem to don’t understand. Only reason I didn’t knock you the fuck out was because you’re carrying my seed. The next time, I won’t give a fuck, so it’s best for you to leave. I don’t want to end up feeling like no ho-ass nigga because you couldn’t keep your hands to yourself.”
“We can’t talk about it, Khi?” Selena asked as she rubbed her hand over her stomach.
“There’s nothing to talk about, Selena. I’m good on all that. If I wouldn’t have been arguing with you last night, I might could’ve made it to Tramell ’n them on time. You not good for business, ma, and I told you when I first started fucking with you that I can’t have nothing fucking with my money or with my fam. You thought you was special or something?”
“You’re just gonna throw me out on the street . . . while I’m pregnant with your child?”
I laughed. “You read my text, man. Don’t play with me. Do I need to leave while you pack your shit, or are you gonna be able to do that with me in the house?”
“You’re fucking her. Just admit it! Tell me the fuckin’ truth, Khi!” Selena yelled, and I sighed. I didn’t have time for this shit.
Selena brought her fist up as if she was going to punch me, but I caught her ass and lightly shoved her back. She stumbled a little bit but caught her footing before she could fall. You would think that would stop her and get her to leave me the fuck alone, but not Selena. Her ass never backed down and never left well enough alone.
“You don’t even put in the effort with me anymore. You used to go so hard on making sure that we worked out, but you don’t even try anymore. You don’t love me, Khi!” she yelled, and I had heard that shit enough for one night.
“Fuck I need to try anymore for? The first time you put your muthafuckin’ hands on me, I knew then I fucked up and made the wrong choice, so there was no need for me to put effort into shit!”
“Then why ask me to marry you? Why keep me around if you knew you no longer wanted to be with me?”
“’Cause I didn’t wanna have another bitch out here carrying my seed without doing shit the right way. I don’t want my fuckin’ kids growing up in a broken-ass home, but you silly-ass bitches don’t know how to appreciate shit.”
“Silly-ass bitch? No, nigga, your junkie-ass baby mama is the silly-ass bitch. I swear you put that bitch and your pissy-ass daughter—”
Before she could even finish that fucked-up-ass statement, I had my hand around her throat and lifted her off the ground a couple of feet. I stared into Selena’s green eyes, wanting to make sure that she knew how fucking serious I was with her. She had the game all the way twisted if she thought I was gonna keep being some sucka-ass nigga when it came to whether I would hit her back.
“Don’t you ever in your muthafuckin’ life say some slick-ass, disrespectful shit about my daughter. You want a nigga to get out of pocket with you, then you got it, bitch. I will fuckin’ murk your ass, Selena, if you pop off foul about Sky ever again. Spoiled-ass broad. Take your ass back to your fuckin’ mama’s house, and I’ll have your shit sent to you. Let this be the last time you contact me unless it’s something concerning my child,” I told her as I released her and caused her to hit the ground.