“Ren, aside from the bass guitar, what other instruments do you play?”
Ren was dressed much more casually than usual. Considering he sometimes wore full three-piece suits on stage, casual didn’t mean the same thing for him as it did for someone like Kell. Ren still wore a white collared shirt and exquisitely tailored black pants, but he’d ditched the jacket and skinny tie. His long black hair fell over one shoulder, glossy as ever. The harsh lighting set up for the film shoot would have made his angular face look austere and somber, but his easy smile softened his expression.
“I play a few different instruments, including piano and violin. My parents—" he paused for a moment, lips pressing together, then continued smoothly, “—my parents insisted I take classical music lessons growing up. I can also pound away on the drums a bit, but I’m no match for Morris.”
“Is it true that the violin piece in Blue Storm is you?”
“Yeah, that was me playing the violin parts in Blue Storm. If you ever see me in concert, about halfway through the song I put down the bass and pull out my violin for a solo.”
“Will we see more of your musical talents someday?”
“Someday I’d love to compose classical versions of Crossroads Rage or Out of the Darkness. Fans seem to love Jayce’s acoustic versions. I’d like to find out if there’s an audience for a piano remix.”
“Morris, what advice would you give someone wanting to pursue a similar career path?”
Plain blue jeans and black or white tees were almost a uniform for Morris. I rarely saw him in anything else. I always wondered if he preferred t-shirts because they showed off his upper arm muscles so well. They were certainly something to be proud of.
“If someone wanted a career in music, I’d tell them it’s tough. This life isn’t easy. It’s a one in a million shot. But if you work hard and you’re determined, anything can happen.”
Typical Morris. Short and to the point.
“Jayce, do you ever get nervous before a performance?”
I held my breath, wondering how he was going to answer. Would the question trigger his anxiety? He didn’t have that sickly, pallid look to him. Instead, he was relaxed, confident, giving the camera that patented Jayce look, cocky and mesmerizing at the same time.
“Do I ever get nervous before a performance? I think it’s only natural to get nervous before going out on stage, whether it’s the first, tenth, or hundredth time. It’s a good thing, I think. It means you’re taking the show seriously.” He wore his ever-present leather jacket and a white tee that molded to every delicious ab. I snapped picture after picture, trying not to focus too much on Jayce. “If you’re nervous, it means you feel the pressure to put on the best show you can. You never want to take your fans for granted. You should feel nervous because each show should be special and unique. I want every fan to have an amazing experience, every time.”
It was the perfect answer. I let out an inward sigh of relief. I should have realized Jayce could handle himself. He was a professional. He’d done dozens of interviews before.
“Kell, how do you handle mistakes during a performance?”
“Mistakes? What’s a mistake?” Kell turned to the rest of the band. “Guys, have you ever heard of this mistake thing before?” Then he grinned and sat back in his chair. “No, but seriously, all musicians dread making a mistake on stage, but it’s going to happen, and more often than you’d like. You can’t let one mistake trip you up. It’s hard, ‘cause sometimes it makes you lose confidence in yourself, but I just remember that even the greatest artists make mistakes. The trick is to just power through it, keep on going and continue putting on a great show.”
“Ren, what are your inspirations?”
“I have too many inspirations to name. There is one artist who just blows my mind, Miyavi. He was originally in a rock band, Dué le Quartz. That was more than a decade ago. Miyavi went solo and released some amazing stuff. He has this great style of playing, like he’s slapping the strings.”
“Have you ever met him in person?”
Ren laughed. “God, no, I’ve never met Miyavi in person. Only in concerts. It would be a dream come true, though.”
“Jayce, how do you and the guys juggle work with your personal lives?”
“When you’re touring all the time or stuck in a studio recording, it’s easy to forget there’s another life out there. It’s important to have down time to reconnect with the people you love. It helps ground you.”
“Yeah, so you don’t get a swollen head like me,” Kell interrupted.
“And is there love in your life, Jayce?”
I nearly bit my tongue. Why the hell was Deena asking that? I tried to catch her eye, but she wasn’t looking in my direction. Did she know? Did she suspect? How had she found out? Was I going to lose my job over one forbidden moment?
The corner of Jayce’s lips twitched up. “I did have a little something with one girl,” he admitted. “But that’s over now.”
“Do you think you’ll ever get back together?”
He fought back surprise. “I don’t know. I’m just focusing on the music right now.”
Nausea rose up in my stomach as I feared the worst, but Deena moved on and didn’t seem interested in pushing the matter further. I let out a breath of relief. Hopefully, the question was just a routine one. There was no way anyone could know what happened between me and Jayce. For all I knew, Jayce wasn’t even talking about me. After all, we’d only shared the one kiss. It made more sense for him to be talking about a previous girlfriend.
I was just being paranoid.
Chapter Nine
Even though I knew I needed to put it out of my mind, I couldn’t stop thinking about what happened with Jayce in that stairwell. I was positive he didn’t see me as just another groupie, but that was exactly what everyone would think if they found out we’d kissed. His fans would think he’d chosen someone and they would die of jealousy. Who knew what the crazy ones were capable of?
I stared down at my phone, pretending to work, when really I was trying to gather my thoughts.
Besides, what kind of relationship could I possibly have with someone like Jayce? He was a rock star, practically a god in the eyes of many fans. I was a lowly social media girl, just an intern, not even out of college. He was so far above me in status, I couldn’t understand what he saw in me.
It was better to just forget we’d ever been more than work colleagues. Jayce and I had agreed that was the safest thing for both of us. I would have to put it all out of my mind. Jayce and I had our moment, but that was it. No one was going to find out.
I looked up from my phone and saw the producer, Cornelius Connor, directing a cameraman to shoot something from backstage. He wasn’t the director, but he was always telling the camera operator what to do. How much of a control freak was he, anyway? I’d never seen him just standing around, relaxing, not working. He was always doing something, always in motion.
I hadn’t gotten around to collecting that content for him yet. He wanted to shoot the band’s reaction to weird fan stuff, but I still hadn’t gone trawling through the depths of the internet to find some. I hoped I wasn’t inconveniencing him because of it.
He swung around and pointed a finger in my direction. I ducked out of the way before I ended up in the shot. He saw me, and instead of looking irritated, he gave me a nod and a wave. I returned it, feeling guilty.
I went back to my phone. I’d start gathering that content now. It wasn’t too hard, since I was already heavily involved in monitoring and engaging with fans on several different social media platforms. I didn’t know exactly what he was looking for, but I found a piece of fan art that someone had posted. They’d drawn the band members in a cute cartoon style, which was interesting enough, but the cherry on top was that they were all wearing the costumes from the Japanese anime Sailor Moon, miniskirt, tiaras, and all. I stifled a giggle and quickly emailed the picture to Cornelius with one line:
Weird
enough for you?
I heard his phone ping from across the room, and he pulled it out. He must have gotten my email because he looked up and gave me a thumbs up. Looked like I was on the right track.
I sent back another email:
I think Kell would make a better Sailor Moon than Jayce, don’t you think?
He threw me a grin when he got the email.
I thought the picture was too cute not to share. I didn’t want to post it from the band account, not without asking the band members what they thought of it first, but it was definitely something AudioAiley would share with her followers.
@AudioAiley: This artist, while talented, is mistaken. CLEARLY Kell would make a better Sailor Moon. Blond hair? Check. Excitable and hyper? Check. Secretly a princess? …Jury’s still out on that one.
I sent it off, hoping my followers would find it funny.
Another ping echoed through the room, and Cornelius pulled out his phone again. He probably got a million emails a day. He jerked back in surprise, then whipped his head up, looking directly at me. I was taken aback. Had he received some bad news? What did I have to do with it?
He excused himself from the camera operator he was talking to and strode across the room in quick steps, making a beeline toward me. I began to feel nervous. Had I done something to upset him? Maybe he didn’t like the fan art after all. People practically jumped out of his way, so intent was he on his destination. I looked around and behind me, trying to see if he was heading toward someone else, but no. There was no one else.
He stopped inches away from me, flicking his eyes back and forth between both of mine. I opened my mouth to ask him what was wrong, not sure what I’d done to upset him. I wanted to stay on his good side. He spoke before I could ask, voice filled with wonder and confusion.
“It’s you.”
“I’m sorry?”
He reached out and cupped my face in his hands. I jerked back in surprise, but he didn’t let me go. Instead, he swooped down, lowering his head, and before I could register what was happening, his lips were on mine.
Chapter Ten
I was shocked by the suddenness of the kiss and surprised by how passionate it was, though it remained chaste. I heard whispers and murmurs. I was at work in front of my coworkers. I pushed him away with a shove. He released me from his grip, and I frowned at him.
“What the hell was that?”
“I can’t believe it’s you,” he said, eyes roving all over my face. “Guess I don’t have to wait until summer is over.”
Wait until summer was over? There was only one person I knew who had told me something like that.
“Cornelius, why did you—”
Then it hit me. Saying his name out loud triggered something. I repeated it inside my head, slowly sounding out every syllable. Cor-ne-li-us.
“…Neil?”
“Ailey.” He broke out into a big grin. “I’ve wanted to meet you for months.”
My heartbeat sped up and I couldn’t help the reciprocal grin that erupted on my face. “Oh my god, Neil! It’s you!”
He pulled me toward him, for a hug this time, not a kiss. I squeezed him tight like I was greeting a long lost friend. In a way, I was. He released me after a few moments, standing back to look me over.
“How did I not realize it was you?” he asked.
“Neither of us were particularly forthcoming about our real identities.” I let out a small laugh. “Can you imagine if we had worked side by side all summer and then showed up for that drink in September?”
He laughed along with me. “Guess it’s better we found out early.” He gave me a sheepish grin and glanced around. All the other crew members had stopped what they were doing to stare. As soon as they realized we had noticed, they all hurried back to their jobs, pretending to ignore us. There were definitely a few whispered conversations.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you out of the blue in front of everyone like that.”
“It probably wasn’t the best timing.” I ducked my head to hide the blush.
His phone pinged, and he grimaced. “Better get back to work. Do you think someday soon, when I’m not too busy, we could get together and I could buy you that drink?”
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. “I’d like that.”
Neil gave me a grin and a final hug. “Okay. Great. Can’t wait.”
“Me, too.”
I watched him walk away, taking notice of the details I hadn’t before, applying them to the Neil I knew online. The way his light brown hair stuck up in every direction, an artfully coiffed mess. The way he strode with a purpose, no-nonsense and straight toward his goal. I also couldn’t help but notice that firm ass covered by his expertly tailored slacks.
I lowered my gaze before anyone caught me staring. I turned around and headed toward the stage.
My heart leaped into my throat.
Jayce.
He was standing right in front of me, at the far end of the hallway. I had no idea how long he’d been there. How much had he seen?
My face flushed with embarrassment. He must have seen Neil kiss me. He must have thought the worst of me. Did he think I was the kind of girl who went around sleeping with any guy who crossed her path? I opened my mouth to explain, but nothing came out. How could I explain it? I’d just kissed another man in front of him. I wanted to sink into the floor.
No.
That wasn’t right.
I shouldn’t feel ashamed for what just happened.
Jayce and I weren’t together. We’d both agreed that it would never work between us. We’d had our fun, but it was over. It could never happen again. I was free to kiss and date and sleep with whomever I chose. Jayce must know that.
I straightened my back, standing upright. There was no reason things had to be awkward between us.
“Neil… that is, Cornelius Connor, is a friend of mine.”
Jayce narrowed his eyes and wheeled around on his heel, storming away before I could say anything else.
The last fading hints of embarrassment turned to worry. Jayce looked honestly upset. He had said it himself. He’d followed me online forever. He’d always wanted to meet me. Even though we knew it would never work between us, he might still want us to be something more.
I had to admit to myself that, deep down, I had been starting to hope there could be something more between us as well. I’d gotten to know Jayce, the real Jayce, not the persona he put on for fans, and I’d discovered that I liked him. I liked being around him and talking with him. I especially loved kissing him.
My mind flashed back to Neil’s kiss. I’d known Neil for a lot longer than I’d known Jayce, but I’d gotten to know Jayce in person, not just through online messages.
Would it be right to date Neil if I was attracted to Jayce?
I shook my head to clear the thoughts going around in circles. I’d go out for drinks with Neil and see how the night went, then I’d talk to Jayce and clear the air between us.
I nodded to myself, pleased with my plan.
There was a small part of me, though, that couldn’t help but wonder.
If it came down to it, which of them would I choose?
***
I WAS NERVOUS around Jayce for days after he saw Neil kiss me. The tour bus had a faint tension running through it whenever silence fell between the five of us. Kell was good at keeping up the chatter. Ren was just as talkative, but a lot less narcissistic in subject matter, thankfully.
The last thing I wanted was to be stuck on a bus with Jayce, but even worse was that I still needed to interact with him to do my job. Asking him to pose sexily for my camera and respond to fan’s declarations of love was torture. Both of us tried to act like nothing was wrong, and we mostly succeeded, but I still went to bed every night with an ache of worry in my chest.
To make matters worse, after a long day of concerts and interviews, the guys decided to unwind by heading out to a club. Going out drinking with Jayce. Great.
Kell had taken one look at my pencil skirt and blouse and pointed a finger at the tour bus, telling me to march on over and change into something hot. I’d laughed and said I hadn’t thought to pack anything he’d consider hot. I was here for work, after all. He told me to at least go find a skirt with a hemline above my knees.
I’d rummaged through my luggage, trying to remember if I’d packed my cute one piece red dress. It wasn’t exactly short, but it was backless and had a plunging neckline. I was sure Kell would approve.
When I walked off the bus, Kell gave me a wolf whistle and clapped his hands. Jayce’s eyes almost bugged out of his head, and he quickly turned on his heel, putting his back to me.
“Perfect,” Kell said. “Who knew our prim and proper internet girl would turn out to be such a babe behind those boring and prudish skirts?”
“It’s called being professional,” I sniffed, pretending to be offended. “We can’t all do our jobs in ripped jeans and T-shirts with cartoon characters on them.”
“Hey, this is an original Spiderman shirt from 1977. It’s vintage.”
“It has holes. Moths have eaten half that shirt.”
“That’s part of its charm. C’mon, internet girl, we’re all taking a taxi to the club. Morris got us a private booth at Rosette. It’s some fancy new dance club. Just opened.”
“I don’t have to actually dance, do I?”
“Nah. We’re mostly going to be sitting and drinking and possibly flirting with groupies.”
It was a new experience for me to walk right through a red velvet rope without waiting in line. In fact, it was a new experience for me to walk into a dance club at all. I preferred listening to my music live, not through tinny speakers with DJs spinning terrible remixes that ruined the original songs.
Hard Rock Tease: A Rock Star Romance (Darkest Days Book 1) Page 26