by T. K. Leigh
“How did you come up with the name Nepenthe?” he asked, staring at Olivia as she carefully placed the flowers in a vase, making sure it looked perfect.
“I lived out in Big Sur for a while after I graduated college and actually bartended at a great restaurant right on the coast with amazing views. It was called Nepenthe. In Greek mythology, nepenthe is a medicine or elixir for sorrow. I guess it was the first anti-depressant pill there was. So after not having nightmares that night when he was here, he became my own elixir for sorrow. My own personal Nepenthe.” She smiled affectionately down at her cat.
Alexander just stood there, amazed by the woman in front of him. She had so many different layers. He desperately wanted to get to know each and every one of them. And to slowly become another one of her own personal nepenthes.
As Olivia sat in the car holding Alexander’s hand a few minutes later, she was glad Kiera pushed her into actually going that evening. Her heart was beating so loud in her chest, she thought it was going to bust through and walk out of the car. Why did that man have such an effect on her?
She kept hearing Dr. Greenstein’s voice in her head from all those years ago, pushing her to forge real relationships with people. She was engaged in a balancing act of self-preservation and selflessness. It was unclear which would win when it came to Alexander. Should she keep him at arm’s length to avoid the emptiness she would feel when he left her, or should she just jump, feet first, into a new relationship because maybe it’s something he needs or wants, and to hell with Olivia’s selfish thoughts of being abandoned? She was starting to walk the tightrope and it was only a matter of time to see if she made it across or fell to the depths yet again.
“You look beautiful tonight, Olivia,” Alexander said after they sat down at their table. When Olivia had opened the door earlier that evening, Alexander was stunned at the sight of her beauty. She looked like a Grecian goddess, her figure illuminated from behind by light from the setting sun streaking through her house.
“Thank you.” She blushed as she opened the menu. Alexander chose to take her to Atlantic Fish, a restaurant that wasn’t too far from Olivia’s house. It was one of his favorite spots in the city to grab oysters and a great bottle of wine. As he ordered a bottle of Far Niente chardonnay and a dozen blue point oysters, Olivia glanced around the large restaurant, the mahogany walls adorned with various nautical themed prints.
“I hope I’m not being presumptuous ordering for you.” Olivia snapped her head back to the table, her eyes meeting Alexander’s. He was a man who liked control, Olivia could tell.
“I don’t mind. White wine and oysters go hand in hand, don’t they?” She smiled before looking away.
Alexander recalled one evening from his childhood at the DeLuca’s beach house with his father. They sat on their back deck, overlooking the Atlantic Ocean. He was eight years old and the DeLuca’s daughter was six. They were all eating oysters, throwing their shells over the balcony onto the sand below. When the DeLuca’s little daughter saw what they were doing, she snapped her crispy green bean snack in two, ate half, and threw the other half over the edge. Everyone roared with laughter and she continued to do that the rest of the evening. The memory caused Alexander to smile, wondering if the woman across the table from him would remember that. If it was even her.
The waiter returned with their wine, bringing Alexander back from his thoughts. It was a perfect choice, Olivia thought. Light and crisp but not too sweet. The perfect chardonnay.
“So I heard from Detective Wilder today,” Olivia said, breaking a somewhat awkward silence.
“I thought you might. I spoke with her last evening. I want to make sure nothing bad happens to you…” he said, his voice trailing off, remembering his sister’s warning and the promise he had made to a little girl all those years ago.
“Are you okay?” Olivia glanced at Alexander who had a look on his face as though he was searching the back of his brain for something.
“Yeah. Sorry. I’m just having a déjà vu moment, I guess.”
Olivia smiled at his response. “I get those all the time. Mostly I just run into people I should remember that I knew years ago when I went to B.C., but I can’t remember who they are for the life of me.”
Alexander reached across the crisp white tablecloth and grabbed Olivia’s delicate hand, caressing her knuckles. It was such a simple, chaste gesture, but it ignited sparks deep within both their bodies.
The oysters arrived, interrupting their moment. Olivia looked at Alexander, grinning, the corners of her mouth turned up in a mischievous smirk. “Umm, how are you with spicy cocktail sauce?”
“Ah, a woman after my own heart. Do it up, Love.”
Olivia smiled to herself as her heart raced. He called me Love! She grabbed the cocktail sauce and added quite a bit of horseradish to it, as well as some hot sauce. She gingerly squeezed a lemon over the oysters. Once she was satisfied that the oysters were ready, she put a small amount of cocktail sauce on one of the large blue point oysters in front of her and, clinking shells with Alexander, slid one down her throat.
“Mmmm… I love oysters,” Olivia said, relishing the salty taste in her mouth. “I remember watching my parents eat oysters all the time when I was younger. We would spend our summers at a beach house. Mom came from money. It was a family house.” Olivia grabbed another oyster and Alexander stared as she prepared it and slid it down her throat again. The way she ate her oyster was strangely erotic, he thought to himself.
“I remember our beach house. It’s one of the strongest memories I have of my life before the accident. And I remember them having friends over. I was so jealous of them because they would eat oysters on the deck. And it wasn’t because they were eating oysters. It was because they would toss the shells over the side of the deck. And I wanted to do that. I couldn’t wait until I got older and could toss my oyster shells over the deck, too.”
Alexander couldn’t believe his ears. Too many coincidences. He kept telling himself that it was just a story. I’m sure lots of people would throw their oyster shells over the side of the deck.
They finished the rest of their meal engaging in relative small talk. After they left the restaurant, Olivia said she preferred to walk home. She didn’t live far and the temperature had cooled down dramatically. Alexander grabbed her hand and they walked down Boylston Street in relative silence, a light breeze in the air.
“Sorry to bring this up again, but I want you to promise me something,” Alexander said as they crossed over to Commonwealth Avenue and were about two blocks from Olivia’s house.
“What is it?”
“I want you to always let me know that you’re okay. I mean, with Simon out on bail, I just want to make sure he’s not doing anything he’s not supposed to.” Alexander was worried. And he desperately needed to feel in control of her safety. He resented not feeling that control, but he didn’t want to scare this girl off by setting up round-the-clock protection for her. Not just yet, anyway.
“I’ll be fine.” Olivia stopped walking and turned to face him, grabbing his other hand in hers. “And I’ll let you know if I ever need anything. I promise.” She smiled at him and a look of relief washed over his face. He pulled her close, embracing her. His warmth surrounded her. It felt so familiar to her, as if she had known that man her entire life. It felt like home.
“Okay. Can you do me one more favor?” He stroked her hair, not wanting to release her from his embrace. Olivia caressed his back and felt the muscles rippling underneath his shirt. Her thoughts soon went to places that were unspeakable in public.
“What’s that?” She pulled out of his embrace to look into his eyes.
“Can I have a security system installed in your house? You live in Boston. You should have one anyway.” At least if there was a security system installed in Olivia’s house, she would be a little safer, Alexander thought.
“I have a security system and his name is Nepenthe.” Olivia laughed. He simply smiled
at her and remained silent, a stern look on his face as he waited for her to agree to his request.
“Okay,” Olivia exhaled. “That’s fine.” How could she say no to those eyes?
“Great. Can I have my team come over Thursday? I have to head out of town later that evening and I’d feel better leaving you, knowing that your house was secure.”
“Thursday would be fine.” She wondered why he had to leave town. Probably some clandestine operation, Mr. Spy-Man, she thought to herself.
They strolled the rest of the way to Olivia’s house, holding hands. Alexander walked Olivia up the steps to her front door and she turned to face him, dreading another awkward moment.
“Olivia,” Alexander said breathlessly, pulling her body into his. He stroked her hair again. She could get used to the feeling of his body next to hers, warming her in the cool Boston night air. She leaned her head back to look up at him. Would he freakin’ kiss me already? Olivia thought. She licked her lips as she stared into his eyes, hoping he would get the hint.
“Oh, Olivia.” He pulled her face into his chest, resting his chin on her head as he gently caressed her back. “You have no idea how badly I want to put my lips on you.” He exhaled loudly. “God. It’s taking all of my resolve to not taste you right now.”
“Then why don’t you?” Olivia took a deep breath. He smelled so good.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to stop at just kissing you, and I couldn’t live with myself. I mean, after what almost happened to you Friday,” he floundered through his bullshit reason. He was more concerned with her being his long lost Olivia. How could he get close to her? Would she ever forgive him for letting her down all those years ago?
“But what if I want to kiss you?” Olivia looked up at Alexander again, a pout on her face.
“You will, I promise, Love.” She felt butterflies at his term of endearment. She wanted to hear that again. “But when the time is right. And it will be amazing.” Alexander needed more answers.
“A little confident of your skills, aren’t you?” Olivia laughed, pushing him away and taking a step back.
“Maybe. I mean…” He looked slightly exasperated as he ran his hand through his hair. It made his already disheveled hair look even sexier. Olivia started to feel a pulsating sensation between her legs as Alexander closed the gap between them once again. “Don’t you feel this thing between us? The one thing I learned in my time overseas and after my father died was that life is precious.” He stared down at the woman in front of him, his fierce green eyes intense. “I’ve never felt this way about someone after only knowing them for a few short days. I can’t focus at work. I can’t do anything without thinking about you. All these feelings are so foreign to me, Olivia. I don’t know what to make of it. I normally couldn’t give two shits about actually taking someone out, but with you, I don’t know. I’m not only interested about getting you into my bed. I just want to see you smile. This is such a strange thing for me.”
Olivia felt her heart drop into her stomach. She felt the same way. All thoughts were of Alexander. She had forgotten about Simon altogether until Detective Wilder brought him back to the foreground earlier that day.
“God, Olivia,” he breathed, pulling her back into his arms, desperately needing to feel her small body against him again. “What are you doing to me? There’s something about you that keeps me coming back to you. I can’t explain it. And I’m not sure I want to.” He took a step back, holding onto her forearms. “Let’s just enjoy this thing, because I am.”
“I am, too,” she giggled, making Alexander’s heart soar. He loved that sound.
“When can I see you again? I have to leave town Thursday, but maybe tomorrow?” He looked at her with a hopeful expression on his face. In the meantime, he was determined to get answers, even if that meant calling in some favors.
“Umm…” She hesitated, unsure of whether she should tell him about singing in a band.
Alexander’s heart dropped, noticing her apprehension. “What is it? Are you seeing someone? I mean, that’s fine if you are,” he rambled nervously.
“No. It’s just, well… I kind of used to sing in a band when I was in college. And my friend Kiera tricked me into going to that bar last Friday and they were playing, and I sang a bunch of songs with them, and now I guess I’m part of the band again and we have a gig on Friday, but I have to go to rehearsal tomorrow.” Olivia let out a huge breath, gauging his reaction.
His face turned pale and he had that look again. Like he was searching his brain for something.
“That’s probably not your scene, huh?”
He snapped out of it. “No. No. Sorry, that’s not it. Déjà vu moment again. Well, can I come and watch? I mean, one of these Friday nights? Do you mind?”
“No. Of course not. I’d love for you to come. You can meet Kiera. When do you get back into town? Will you be back Friday?”
“I don’t think so, Love. How about Sunday? Are you available? I’m hoping to get back into town late morning and I’d like to see you.”
“I can do Sunday.” Olivia smiled, happy that she had another plan to see him. She gazed at him, seeing the heat that was building behind his emerald eyes, and started to breathe heavier.
“Oh, screw it,” he said, pushing Olivia against the door to her house, tilting her chin up. Before she knew what was happening, she felt his soft, full lips on her mouth. She opened her lips in response to his, giving him permission to enter with his tongue, his movements gentle but, at the same time, forceful, as if staking his claim. Olivia felt his growing arousal against her abdomen. She deepened the kiss in response.
Alexander traced his fingers up and down the side of her stomach, making Olivia moan in his mouth. He pulled away and they both stood on her front stoop, panting.
“Holy crap,” Olivia exhaled, trying to catch her breath. In all her twenty-seven years she couldn’t remember ever feeling so lightheaded after a kiss.
“You’ve got that right.” He laughed. “You should go inside before I pin you against that door again.” He stared down at her, his eyes full of desire.
“I don’t mind,” Olivia said playfully, batting her eyes.
“Get inside, please,” Alexander said softly, bringing his lips back to hers and planting a soft kiss on her lips.
“Okay,” she replied, his lips still not leaving her mouth. “I have to get my keys.”
“You can’t do that from this position?”
“It might be hard not being able to look down.” Olivia smiled.
“I really like the taste of your lips.”
Olivia moaned at his words and he pulled his mouth away. She frowned from the loss of contact as she fished her keys out of her purse and turned to unlock her front door. Alexander was behind her immediately, wrapping his arm around her and caressing her stomach. Olivia backed into him, arching her neck to the side, giving him access to it. He brushed her hair away and kissed her neck, inhaling her scent. She wiggled her butt against him, feeling his growing erection.
He quickly spun her around. “You need to play fair, Miss Adler,” he whispered in her ear, making Olivia’s body tighten. “Or you’ll regret it.” He gave her a quick kiss on her neck before she turned back around to open the door, her heart racing again.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come inside, Mr. Burnham?” Olivia turned back toward him, giving him her most innocent smile. She was brimming with sexual tension and badly needed some release.
“Oh, you have no idea how badly I want to come inside,” he replied, smirking at the double entendre. “But not tonight. For once, I want to do this right and not rush into anything,” he murmured in her ear, kissing her cheek. “By the time I’m through sweeping you off your feet, you will be bursting at the seams, begging me to fuck you, never wanting another man inside you again.”
Olivia gasped. He pulled back and she looked at him with wide eyes. He smiled and placed another gentle, moist kiss on her lips. “I’ll be thinking
of you.” He turned to walk down the front steps to the waiting SUV that had arrived unbeknownst to Olivia. She watched him get into the car as she closed and locked her front door. She leaned her back against the door and tried to regain what little composure she had left.
In the car, Alexander grabbed his cell phone and made a quick call.
“Simpson, it’s Burnham here. I need everything you can find on one Sarah Olivia Adler. Not really interested in anything recent. I’m more interested in the first ten years of her life. Get it to my sister as soon as possible. This is a top priority.”
He hung up and texted Carol, asking her to do an age enhancement on a photo of Olivia as a child, something he had avoided doing for the past twenty-one years. He sighed, hoping he was doing the right thing. He just had to know one way or the other.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
HIGH AND DRY
OLIVIA felt sluggish the following morning as she made her way to work in order to teach her six a.m. circuit training class. She was happy once her morning classes were finished so that she could relax in her office and deal with some much neglected paperwork. She grabbed her cell phone to see if she had any missed calls, which was doubtful at eight o’clock in the morning.
Her heart skipped a beat when she saw a text from Alexander.
Alexander: Good morning, Love. I hope you slept well.
She quickly typed a reply.
Olivia: I slept well enough, although it was difficult to get to sleep at first.
Almost instantly, she received a response.
Alexander: And why is that?
Olivia: I had a throbbing sensation between my legs from being left high and dry last night. Well, maybe not too dry. :-)