“I like Michael’s plan,” I say. “But there’s one little problem with it.”
“And what’s that?” Michael asks.
“Felicia. She’s still out by the car. We have to get her inside safely. How are we going to do that? It’s like thirty feet from the car to the porch, and it’s all open space. She’ll be an easy target.”
“We’ll have to distract them somehow,” Janelle says. “Michael, could you go around to the side of the house and cover her? If they try to shoot her, you could just shoot them first.”
“I’ll do it,” I say.
“No!” Aaron says. “You are not going out—”
“Felicia is my responsibility, Aaron. She trusts me to keep her safe, and that’s what I’m going to do.”
“It’s too dangerous.”
“I don’t care. She’s out there, probably scared out of her mind, and I’m going to help her. Now are you going to help me or not?”
He sighs. “Alright, but I want you to promise me you’ll be careful.”
“I promise,” I say, thinking of a promise I made to Felicia not too long ago. “Distract them while I sneak out the backdoor and around the side of the house.”
Without another word, I head for the backdoor, sliding it shut quietly behind me. Gunfire erupts from the house, and I quicken my pace as the bandits answer back, hoping to use their distraction to my full advantage. I walk along the far side of the house, hoping to get as close to the driveway as I can. When I reach the edge of the house, I crane my head around, hoping to catch a glimpse of Felicia.
From my position, I can clearly see the SUV, and I can just make out Felicia’s huddled form crouching near the back tire. Her head is down in her arms, and I can see her shoulders shaking as she sobs to herself. “Felicia!” I hiss, trying to get her attention. She doesn’t answer, and I look around for something to throw at her.
My gaze lands on a small rock at my feet, and I pick it up, take aim, and toss it at her. The rock bounces off her leg and her head snaps up. Her eyes widen when she sees me, and she almost smiles. Before she can speak, I put my finger to my lips, shushing her. She nods her head in understanding as she gets to her feet.
“You have to make a run for it.”
Her eyes widen again. “Are you crazy?” she asks quietly, looking over her shoulder. She’s closer to me than the front door, but it’s still a far distance for an unarmed girl to make. “I’ll never make it.”
“Yes, you will,” I say firmly. “Aaron and the others are going to keep them busy so you can get away.”
She looks unsure, but she nods her head. “Alright. If you say it’ll work, then it’ll work. I trust you, Madison.”
“When they start shooting again, I want you to just run. Just run, and don’t look back, no matter what. Understand? I’ll be right here.”
She wipes her face with the back of her hand, looking more frightened than I’ve ever seen her. “Madison? If I don’t make it—”
“You will.”
“But if I don’t, I just want you to know that I love you. And I wanna thank you for taking care of me.”
My eyes start to water and I get too choked up to say anything to her, so I just nod and hope she understands that the feeling is mutual. She clutches the golden cross around her throat, and she closes her eyes. I can see her lips start moving as she offers up a quick prayer. When she’s done, her eyes snap open, and for a brief minute, the two of us stand still, eyes locked on each other. I offer her a tiny smile, hoping to alleviate some of her fears.
I’m not sure who fires first, but once the gunfire starts, Felicia shoves away from the SUV and sprints toward me. Her arms are pumping by her sides and her cheeks puff out as she breathes deeply. She’s only a few feet from the side of the house when the unmistakable sound of a shotgun blast cuts through the air and Felicia pitches forward with a gasp, landing face first in the dirt at my feet.
Time seems to slow to a crawl as I stare down at Felicia. Blood covers her back, soaking through her t-shirt and leaking onto the ground beneath her. “Felicia?” I call her name, but she doesn’t answer, and she doesn’t move. I drop down to my knees, ignoring the wetness as it seeps through my pants, and I turn her over. Her honey colored eyes stare lifelessly up at me, and I feel my heart shatter.
“Felicia!” The strangled wail tears at my throat. I scream her name over and over again, as if saying her name will somehow miraculously bring her back to me. But no matter how hard I scream, Felicia doesn’t move. She’s gone, and nothing will ever bring her back.
Chapter Sixteen
Everything around me fades away, leaving nothing but the sound of my erratic heartbeat. My mind goes blank as I kneel down beside Felicia’s body, oblivious to the sounds of gunfire and shouting around me. All I can do is stare down at the young girl in my arms, wondering how only a short time ago, she was alive and happy and looking forward to having a long talk with me.
A hand clamps down on my shoulder, snapping me out of my haze, bringing me back to my dangerous surroundings. A bullet hits the side of the house and even though it kills me to do it, I let go of Felicia’s body so Aaron can drag me around the corner of the house, safe from the bullets zipping by. I’m safe from danger, but not from the sight of Felicia’s lifeless body lying in the dirt nearby. Her head is tilted to the side, just enough so I can see her lifeless eyes.
“Maddy!” Aaron shouts, obviously not for the first time. He grabs my shoulders and shakes me back and forth. “Snap out of it!” I try to shove him away, but Aaron grips my wrists, refusing to let go of me. “Come on! We have to go.”
He wants me to leave Felicia?
Aaron’s grip on my wrist tightens, as if he expects me to fight him, and he yanks me away from the side of the house, kicking and screaming the whole way. As we run, I try to loosen his hold on my wrist, but he’s far too strong for me. He doesn’t let go of my arm until the two of us safely reach the backdoor. He shoves me through the open door and slams it shut behind me before I can even consider running back to Felicia.
Tears stream down my face as I pound on Aaron’s chest, demanding that he step aside and let me leave. He withstands my assault with a grim but determined expression on his face. “Maddy,” he says gently, halting my half-hearted attack. “I’m sorry, but Felicia is gone, and if you go back out there, you’ll be joining her. I can’t let that happen.”
“Aaron—”
He grips my shoulders so tight I’m sure I’ll find bruises there later, and he forces me to look him in the eyes. “Maddy, I need you. You have to pull yourself together or other people are going to die. I need to know that I can count on you to help me get these people out of here safely. Can I trust you to think clearly?”
I think of Felicia lying out there—cold and lifeless—and my heart aches. But I also think of Daisy, who is going to be even more alone now that Felicia is gone. And I think of Todd, who is too weak to look after himself. “I’m with you, Aaron,” I say. My voice breaks and I’m near tears again, but I know I have to be strong right now, or someone else I care about might pay the price.
Aaron lets go of me and I follow him into the entrance to the house. Michael is shooting from one of the busted kitchen windows while Janelle leans around the open door. Michael glances back at me, and I ignore the pity I see in his eyes. “I got one of them, but there are still two of them left. What do we do now?”
“We rush them,” I say, clutching my gun so tight I can feel the textured grip biting into my hand. “Two against four. It should be no problem. Let’s finish these animals off and be done with this.”
All three of them stare back at me as if I’ve just spontaneously grown a second head, but I ignore them. I want these animals to suffer for what they’ve done to Felicia, but I’ll settle for leaving them in the street to rot like the trash they are. These dark, deadly thoughts should bother me, but I’m far beyond caring at this point. My heart pounds in my chest and there’s a loud roar between my ears
, blocking out everything except for my bloodlust and anger. I want these men dead and there is nothing that will stand in my way.
“Alright,” Aaron says. “We stay together as a group and we move as one. Try to look out for one another while we’re exposed, and make your shots count. We’re dangerously low on ammo. Hopefully they’ll have some on them and we can replenish our supplies. If not, we’ll have to fight our way to the chopper with our bare hands.”
“We get it,” I snarl impatiently. “Let’s go!”
I make a point of ignoring his worried glance as we gather by the front door. Aaron and Michael check everyone’s weapons, and I try not to scream from impatience. Felicia’s killers are so close, and I refuse to let them get away with what they’ve done. Knowing that I will never see Felicia smile again, or hear her laugh, or feel her arms around me sends my mind into overdrive. My heart starts to race and my palms began to itch with anticipation.
Aaron counts to three, and we’re off. Aaron and the others crouch down behind the SUV for protection, but I’m unable to stop. So I keep running, shooting as I go. My first shot shatters the passenger side window of their red truck, and the second hits the shoulder of one of the two remaining men. He yells as he spins away from the safety of the truck, hitting the ground with a thud.
Aaron shouts my name, but I ignore him as I cross the street, bearing down on the remaining bandit. Before I can reach him, he gets to his feet and makes a run for it, seeking the safety of the house. He turns and fires two shots, forcing me to take cover behind the red truck. The shots go wide, but now that he’s safe behind the corner of the house, he can afford to take the time to aim his next attack. I know I should wait for Aaron and the others, but from my place near the red truck, I can just make out Felicia’s body, and rage clouds my judgment.
Abandoning the safety of the red truck, I head for the house. He peeks around the corner and his eyes widen when he sees me. He starts to bring his weapon up, but he’s too slow, and I pull the trigger before the weapon leaves his side. The weapon falls from his hand as he drops to his knees before slumping to the side. A thin trail of blood leaks from the bullet lodged in his head, and for a second, I just stand there, staring at the man who may have killed Felicia. Strangely enough, I have to fight the urge to shoot him again and again. But I can’t waste the ammunition, so I settle for spitting at his feet and walking away without another glance at him.
I only make it a handful of steps before I hear a cough, and I stop in my tracks. The second bandit moves as he hacks up a mouthful of blood. From where I stand, I can make out the red stain blossoming across his chest and I figure my bullet must have punctured one of his lungs. Now he’s drowning in his own blood.
That thought brings me just a hint of evil joy, and I move closer so I can get a better look at him. His shotgun is lying near his fingers, and I kick it away so he won’t be able to use it against me. His eyes meet mine, and I find myself unable to look away from him. The two of us remain where we are, both unmoving as we silently pant to ourselves—him from pain and me from exhaustion.
He hacks again, and I feel the first tug at my conscience. This isn’t who you are…
Even though part of me thinks he deserves to suffer for what he did to Felicia, I bring my hand up, hesitating as he stares at the end of my gun. He nods his head slightly, and I pull the trigger, putting him out of his misery, even though I know he doesn’t deserve it. It takes me a second to realize that Aaron is standing beside me, staring down at this man’s lifeless body with a strange expression on his face.
“Maddy, what is wrong with you? You could have been killed!”
“I don’t know,” I say softly, staring down at the man lying at my feet. “All I could think about was Felicia, and how she trusted me to take care of her and keep her safe. I failed her, Aaron, and now she’s dead because of it. I couldn’t let them get away with it. I wanted them to suffer, but I settled for making them pay.”
“That doesn’t sound like you.”
“The world changed, and I guess it changed me. Only the strong survive Aaron, so I’ll make myself strong. I won’t end up like Felicia.”
We both fall silent until a nearby gunshot makes me flinch. Aaron puts his arm around my shoulder and pulls me closer. “I think the gun shots from our fight attracted zombies, because they’re starting to flock to this area. Michael is taking care of a few of the ones that are straying too close, but more of them will be coming, and we don’t wanna be here when they show up.”
“I’m not leaving until we bury Felicia.”
“Maddy—”
“If that’s a problem then leave without me!” I shout, pulling away from him. “She deserves a proper burial, and I’m not leaving until she gets one. It’s the least I can do since I failed to protect her.”
Aaron sighs, and I get the feeling that he feels sorry for me. “I’ll see if I can’t find a shovel in the garage. Go and make sure the others are ready to leave, and I’ll start digging. We can’t be here any longer than we have to be, or someone else is going to…” he trails off, but he doesn’t have to finish that thought. I know that staying here is putting all of our lives in danger, but I can’t bring myself to leave Felicia without giving myself a proper chance to say goodbye.
I give Aaron’s shoulder a light squeeze. “Thank you.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
He heads off towards the garage, and I make my way back up to the house. Janelle is waiting by the door with her shotgun in her hand once again, and she gives me a quick, sympathetic look as I pass by. “I’m sorry about Felicia,” she says quietly. “I know the two of you were close.”
“Yeah, we were.”
She doesn’t say anything else as I walk by, and I’m glad for that. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to talk about Felicia without breaking down completely. It feels like the only thing that is keeping me going right now is the threat of danger. If it weren’t for the zombies constantly hanging over our heads, I might find a dark corner, huddle down, and cry until there was no more pain in my heart.
Maybe that’s what I need, I think to myself as I step into the kitchen. A chance to slip away by myself and just cry out all of my frustrations. I could get rid of my fear and anger and the pain from losing the people I care about…
“Madison?” Todd is sitting at the kitchen table with Daisy, and they both look terrible. With his pale skin, dark circles under his eyes, and incredibly thin build, he looks like death personified. And Daisy looks like a startled baby deer, wide-eyed, trembling, and like she’s sure there’s a zombie right around the corner, ready to chew on her neck.
I sit down beside them, and Daisy immediately moves closer to me. She doesn’t say a word to me, and I worry that she might be in shock. I don’t want her to revert back to that depressed girl that wants to kill herself. I’m not sure if she would survive a second suicide attempt. If she wants to die, she’ll find a way to do it this time.
“Are you alright?” Todd asks.
“I’m not sure,” I say, biting my lip. “I feel like I’m just waiting for the right time to explode, and I’m worried that once I do, I won’t be able to get myself back under control. I don’t wanna end up like those bandits, like some psychopath that enjoys living in this kind of world. But what I felt during that fight…I can’t explain it. Something inside of me just got all twisted, and I couldn’t think about anything but Felicia. I was so angry, Todd. I wanted to make them suffer.”
“You’re strong, Madison. You’ll beat this world.”
“I hope you’re right.”
*****
Aaron comes to fetch us when Felicia’s grave is dug. Her body is wrapped in a sheet from a hallway closet, and I try not to stare at the bloody smears that stand out against the whiteness of the cloth. The fabric is pulled tightly around her, and I can easily make out her unmoving form. The sight of her is enough to stop me in my tracks, and Todd puts his arm around my waist, pulling me close.
Michael stands guard with a shotgun while Aaron and Janelle lower Felicia’s body into the grave. It’s only a couple of feet deep—just barely deep enough to cover her body—and before Aaron begins filling it in, he looks at me.
“Is there anything you’d like to say?”
“She was religious, wasn’t she?” Daisy asks, looking around at what is left of our group. “Shouldn’t we say a prayer or something?”
“If her God were real, he would have protected her,” I say, surprised by my sudden fury. Just thinking about the idea of there being a God—especially in this world—has my blood turning to acid in my veins, and my hand clenches tightly at my side. “Why should her God get our prayers?”
“Maddy,” Aaron says, walking over to me. “God has a reason for everything He does. I know you don’t believe in Him, but I do, and I’m sure that someone as good and innocent as Felicia is where she deserves to be.” He doesn’t say the word, probably because he thinks I’ll laugh as he does, but I think it anyways.
Heaven.
I grit my teeth to keep from telling Aaron how stupid I think his beliefs are. And instead, I just nod my head and look away, refusing to meet his sad eyes. Let him believe in God. It won’t do him any good, just like it didn’t do Felicia any good.
Aaron says a quick prayer that I don’t quite hear, and as he reaches for the shovel, I stop him. When I reach down into the grave and unhook her golden cross from around her neck, Aaron frowns at me but doesn’t say anything. I wrap the thin, golden chain around my neck, fastening the clasp at the back. Even though I didn’t believe in God before and I certainly don’t now, it feels wrong to leave this place without something of Felicia’s to hold close to my heart.
Aaron shovels dirt into the grave, and all too soon, Felicia disappears from view forever. He takes the back of the shovel and smoothes out the dirt at the top of her grave, and without another look at me, he ushers everyone to the end of the driveway where our remaining supplies are gathered and waiting for us. I steal another moment that we don’t have to stare down at her grave, and I blink away tears and say the only thing that comes to mind.
Zombie Country (Zombie Apocalypse #2) Page 21