I stand nearby listening to this and I want to say something, but I know better than to mess with my mother. She’s little, but mighty.
“He was broken when he met you, wasn’t he?”
Londyn nods her head. “On the outside, but inside is a wonderful man who was held back by guilt, sadness, and fear.”
My mother looks over at me and then at Nico, who leans against the wall.
“And you loved him anyway.”
“Yes.”
“I need a few minutes,” she says and walks down the hallway alone.
I walk over to Londyn and kiss her cheek. “Thank you.”
“For what? It’s the truth.”
“I think her heart is broken.”
“I don’t think so.”
Nico walks over to us and slumps down in the chair. “Can I hold my son?”
“Of course,” Londyn says, handing my nephew to Nico.
“I’m sorry, Luca. It just came out. In the past couple of hours, I went from thinking I lost Candace to realizing I had a second chance. It hit me that you went through that, but your second chance didn’t come until you met Londyn.”
“It’s okay. We’ll get through this.”
A half hour later, my mother reappears. She comes over to where we are and takes a seat.
“I thought about it and then I prayed about it,” she starts. “I love my boys with all my heart. What happened all those years ago was a tragedy and regardless of how it happened, the result is the same. I don’t like that you lied, but I forgive it. The fact that you are both here, together, is enough for me. I don’t think we should tell anyone else, even your father. It’s painful and it will only reopen old wounds. I believe we have all suffered enough.” She looks over at Londyn and pats her hand. “Thank you for loving my son and helping him.”
Londyn simply smiles. My mother continues. “Nico, you remember this moment and cherish Candace. Love her with all your heart.”
“I will, Mamma. I swear it. As soon as she’s better, I’m going to marry her.”
My mother smiles and leans back against her chair. “Then I’m a happy old lady.”
Christopher’s eyes flutter open and when he focuses on his papa, his little face fills with a bright smile. He reaches up and touches Nico’s cheek.
“Papa.”
“That’s right, son,” Nico says, rubbing his nose to Christopher’s. “I’m your papa.”
A nurse comes out a few minutes later and informs Nico he can go see Candace now. Londyn, my mother, and I sit in the waiting room, silently. I hold Londyn’s hand and steal the occasional glance at her. She’s done so much for me and I owe her my life. I’ll never be able to repay her, but I plan to spend the rest of my life trying.
My mother holds onto her rosary beads, silently repeating her prayers. Londyn watches her with fascination and I wonder what she’s thinking.
“Do you still write in your boodle?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“Will you write about today?”
“Of course. I write about every day.”
“Will you let me read some of it?”
She shifts uncomfortably next to me. “I don’t know yet.”
“You trust me?”
“It’s not that. It’s just so…”
“What?”
“My writing ability is no match to yours.”
“We’re not in a competition.” I smile and lift her hand to kiss the back of it. “It would be my utmost honor to read even a page of anything you wrote.”
She smiles sweetly at me. “I’ll think about it.”
“Thank you.”
Hours later, we pull into the driveway at home. We’re both exhausted from the afternoon’s events and all I want to do is feed my sweet angel and take her to bed.
“I’ll just order something for dinner and then we can go to bed.”
“Sounds good,” she says. “I’m going to call Maddie. We need to catch up.”
“Okay.”
Walking inside, Londyn heads for the study as I pull out a menu to order in. What a day it’s been. After we heard that Candace was going to be able to go home tonight, we felt okay leaving Nico. My mother decided to stay a few days to help with Christopher. Nico’s mood lifted considerably after seeing Candace and I knew in my heart that everything was going to be okay.
I hear laughter coming from the study and it makes me smile. All the years I spent alone here, filled with longing and the desire for human interaction, are nearly forgotten now that she’s in my life.
I pour two glasses of wine and join her in the study.
“LONDYN!” MADELEINE SHRIEKS as she answers the phone. “I miss you so!”
“I miss you too, Maddie. How are you?”
“Wonderful. You?”
“I’m fantastic. I have so much to tell you.”
We spend a few minutes catching up. I tell her about the library date and about how our relationship strengthens every day. I tell her our wedding plans for this summer and how excited I am.
“You’ll be my maid of honor, won’t you?”
“Do you even need to ask that?” Madeleine laughs. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
“So, how are things with you? Any updates regarding a certain Dr. Harper?”
“Perhaps.”
“Oh, withholding information, are you?”
“No, it’s just that you said you didn’t want to know the details.”
“I meant I don’t want a graphic description of your love life with him, if there is one. I of course want to know if there is one!”
She laughs. “Oh, Londyn, your brother is wonderful. He’s just as divine as I always thought he was. He’s terribly romantic and I nearly swoon every time I see him.”
“So how often do you see him?”
“Every day lately.”
“I’m so happy for you. It’s progressing well then.”
“Yes, progressing well.”
“Yes,” I hear Devon’s voice in the background. “Quite well, Londy.”
I laugh. “Ah, he’s there now, I see.”
“Yes,” she giggles. “He’s been keeping me company the past few days.”
“Well, that’s delightful. You finally snagged my brother.”
“I did. It only took, well, about fifteen years.”
We both laugh and I look up as my man walks into the room, holding two glasses of wine.
“Well, I’ll let you get back to your evening and I’ll carry on with mine.”
“Love you, Londyn. Lunch soon?”
“Yes, definitely. Kisses.”
We hang up and I take my glass of wine from Luca.
“Madeleine is well?” he asks.
“Quite well and things have progressed with Devon. She’s over the moon happy.”
“That’s good.” He sits on the ottoman next to me. “So am I.”
“Are you okay with what happened today? When Nico told your mum.”
“I am.” He looks down at his glass of wine then back up at me. “I feel relieved. I was good with the decision we made not to tell anyone, and I was worried today that my mother was going to be hurt by the truth, but honestly, I’m happy she knows. It answers many questions for her, but I agree we need to bury it. We’re done confessing. The one thing my mother was right about is that it does no good to reopen old wounds.” He touches my cheek and smiles.
“It doesn’t define me anymore. It is a part of me, but it’s something that happened and it’s not where I am today. I finally believe what people have said to me all these years. I loved her as hard as any man could. It was an accident. We made bad decisions after, but it was the best we could do at the time. I forgive every hurt and most importantly, I forgive myself. I don’t want to spend any more time reliving the past. I have grieved more than enough.” He brushes away a tear that falls down my cheek. “I want to live in the moment, thankful for the chance at love I’ve been given with you, recognizing how blessed I am. I
have a wonderful life filled with so many loving people. I am going to take every opportunity to show my feelings towards them. I am going to love you like no man ever could. I’m a very fortunate man and I’m going to start living like one.”
“I’m simply overwhelmed with happiness for you. I longed to see you get to this place. I love you, Luca, more than I knew I could love a person. My heart is brimming over.”
He takes my hand in his. “Read to me tonight. Even just one page.”
Gazing into his eyes, I know he would never ridicule me. He’s opened up so much for me and bared his soul. It’s time I reciprocated. I stand and take my boodle from my bag. Flipping it open, I take a deep breath and read to him the entry I wrote the day I realized I was falling in love with him. As I read back the words, my lips curve into a smile at the memory.
I avoid looking at him for several minutes, not wanting to lose my nerve. When I finish, I close the book and allow myself to return his gaze.
“That was beautiful,” he starts. “It warms my heart to know you felt that way about me so long ago when I thought there was no way you could find me attractive. I thought to you, I must seem like an old, boring choice when you could have someone like Nico. Little did I know, there is no one on this planet more suited for me than you.”
“I couldn’t agree more. I fantasized about my dream man and you far exceed anything I ever imagined.”
“You need to do something with that.”
“What do you mean?”
“You need to organize it and make it a story.”
“Organize my boodle?”
“Londyn, listen to me. You have a gift. You were writing with the intention that you would be the only one to read it and still, it was wonderful. I think it could be a charming love story.”
“Our story? You want me to write it?”
“I do. You can change the names, of course, but I think other people should read it. Let’s face it, what happened between us is quite remarkable.”
I look down at my boodle as I contemplate his words. I’ve never considered actually trying to write a book, but the longer I think about it the more excited I begin to feel.
“Do you remember that day in my office when we discussed destiny?”
I nod. How could I ever forget that?
“I told you that somehow your destiny was contained in that boodle. I didn’t know at the time you had such a talent with words, but now, I know that your destiny is to write.”
My eyes immediately tear up. “Do you think so?”
“I know so. As sure as I know the sun rose today.” He squeezes my hand. “Will you try?”
“Will you help me?”
“Every step of the way.”
I look up at him and for the first time in my life, I finally know my direction.
“I’ll try.”
Sitting at my desk, I plod my way through the numerous emails waiting for Luca’s attention. Having missed most of yesterday, we have a ton of work to do and it will be a long day. Luca has several faculty meetings today so at least I won’t be distracted by his phenomenal presence.
Luca checked on Nico and Candace this morning and other than being tired and a bit sore, she seems to be doing well. We made plans for dinner this weekend that I look forward to.
I nip out to the break room to get some tea to fuel my morning. As I walk back to the room, I notice the door is opened and I had closed it when I left. Walking in, I notice nothing unusual and sit down to do my work again.
A few hours pass and I start to feel a bit peckish. I decide to pop down and see if Ella is available. I still feel guarded around her, but my last interaction with her was perfectly fine. I walk down the hall to Angela’s office and step inside. What I see next makes my mouth fall open.
“What are you doing with that?” I ask, alarmed.
“Reading. I’m just getting to the part about Luca’s tragic secret.”
“You give that back to me right now. That is private and none of your business.”
“You left it out,” she says, taunting me. She’s sitting back in her chair with her legs on her desk as though she is reading a casual summer novel. “You lied to me for so long. You’ve been sweet on Luca since the beginning. And you liked his brother. Naughty girl.”
I rush towards her and try to grab it, but she jumps out of my reach.
“Give it back, Ella!”
“Not until you tell me why so many secrets. I thought we were friends.”
“Friends or not, I have no obligation to spill every private moment of my life. You are violating my privacy right now. That’s not being a friend.”
“I knew you were lying. I knew it all along.” She flips open a page of my boodle. “Here. You barely worked here and thought Luca was gorgeous.”
“Stop it.”
“Oh, I love the pages about me. You don’t trust me? Tsk Tsk.”
“Ella, I swear to God…”
“What? You’ll do what?”
“I’ll report you.”
“For what?”
“Theft. That is mine and you have no right to be reading it.”
“Fine. You report me and I’ll tell the whole campus that you and Luca have been involved all along.”
“So what? No one cares. Why do you?”
“Maybe everyone would be interested in this little secret Luca has.”
I’m suddenly thankful I had the foresight not to write in detail what that was about.
“Sounds pretty juicy,” she adds, laughing.
“You’re a horrible person, Ella. I’ve done nothing to you. I don’t understand your animosity towards me.”
“You know what? You irritate me. You always have. You walk in and every day it’s ‘oh, Londyn is so smart, Londyn has changed the professor, Londyn is blah blah blah.’ Constantly. Like you cured cancer or something. Then you act all innocent and pure, but meanwhile you’re screwing your boss.”
“So this is all about jealousy?”
“I’m not jealous of you!”
“You sound like it.”
“I’m not. I just don’t like you.”
“You’re a fake. You pretended all along to be my friend, but really, you resented me. I’d rather be anything you can call me than a fake like you.”
“I can’t wait for you to leave. I thought he would fire you like everyone else, but you whipped out your boobs or whatever and he kept you.”
“I’m not leaving. You can make up all the horrible rumors you want about me. It only makes you look foolish. Give me the journal.”
“No.”
She stands defiantly across from me. Then she holds it up and acts like she’s going to rip it in half. I try to contain my horror, knowing that would only fuel her. As I try to think about how to get my book back, I’m surprised when Luca and Angela walk in the room.
“Give it back,” Angela says, firmly.
Ella’s face falls and I can see in her eyes she is contemplating her next move. Luca stands beside me and the look on his face is enough to make the strongest person crumble to their knees. Ella grins and starts to tear the book. As quick as lightening, Luca is across the room and grabbing the boodle from her before she can destroy it.
Ella looks shocked as she realizes she isn’t holding it anymore. She immediately begins to cry, slumping down in her chair. Adding to all the confusion, Dixon shows up. His face fills with concern as he takes in the scene.
“What’s happening here?” he asks.
“You need to go,” Luca says.
“What’s wrong with Ella?”
“We had an incident,” Angela explains.
Dixon pushes past both professors and goes to Ella’s side. “Did you take your medicine today?”
Medicine? What medicine?
Ella shakes her head and cries into Dixon’s shoulder. He looks up at all of us. “Ella was recently diagnosed with a condition that requires medication. It makes her sick to her stomach so sometimes she doesn’t
take it. I’ve been trying to get her to take it every day, but sometimes she says she did when she didn’t. When she doesn’t, her symptoms are worse. What did she do?”
Ella cries harder as Dixon tries to soothe her. Angela and Luca look at each other and then at me.
“She stole my journal and was threatening me,” I say.
Dixon frowns. “She’s been very fixated on a few people lately. You are one of them. I recognized something was going on because she was so hot and cold. One minute, she seemed to think you were becoming good friends. The next, she hated you. It wasn’t normal. I encouraged her to go see the doctor and that’s when she found out she has…” He looks at Ella and she nods her head. “She was diagnosed with a mental disorder. She’s been on medication for about two months, and going through therapy, but she struggles with it.” He strokes her hair off her face.
“I’m sorry,” she mutters. “I really am.”
I don’t know what to say. Angela looks concerned and Luca holds me close. Dixon digs in Ella’s bag and finds her medicine, helping her to take it. He wipes her tears and I can see how much he cares for her.
“She’s not a bad person. She can’t help herself sometimes. We’ve been working on finding the right medicine balance so she doesn’t get so sick every day and is more likely to take it.”
“That explains a lot,” Angela says. “She’s been very erratic lately and I couldn’t figure it out.” She walks closer and rubs Ella’s back. “Why don’t you go home for the rest of the day and rest? We’ll discuss our next steps tomorrow.”
Ella nods and Dixon helps her stand. He puts her coat on her and they begin to walk out. She stops in front of me.
“I’m sorry, Londyn.”
I nod, but say nothing. They walk past us and I finally exhale.
“Poor girl,” Luca says.
Angela nods. “Ella has always been a solid performer. She was always on top of her work and took initiative on other tasks. This year, things were different. She started forgetting things and not finishing assignments. Her moods were very inconsistent- one minute happy, the next hostile about something. The only time she seemed truly happy was when she talked about Dixon.”
“He seems to really care for her,” I observe.
Londyn Falls Page 47