by Ali Parker
"She's not getting any movement in her arms today." Jackie shook her head as her expression fell. "I swear MS has to be one of the worst fucking diseases on the planet."
"Agreed." I let out a soft sigh and picked up the clipboard with my rounds on it. The hardest part about working in the hospital was going to be my empathetic nature. I wanted to cure and heal everyone, which led me to believe that maybe my life would take a drastic turn after graduating from UT the next spring. Maybe that wouldn’t be the end of my education, but instead the beginning. Maybe med school was next.
I glanced up as Tinsley walked up to the nurses’ station, shaking her head.
"I swear I hate to see that girl in pain, but having her sexy-ass brother come running each time is almost worth it." She snorted. "He is honestly the hottest guy I've seen in years. I'm going to give him my number."
"What?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Amanda being in pain was worth it because her brother came running every time something happened? How fucked up was that? "I don't think that's very professional."
"Right, and no one asked you, did they?" She gave me a cocky grin and tapped the tip of my nose with her finger. "Keep your lips closed and get your ass in gear. People are close to death around here and need their meds. That's all you, intern."
I forced the anger burning inside my chest to dissipate enough that I could breathe past it. She wasn't the only bitch in the group of nurses I was being forced to work with, but the head bitch for sure. I gathered the supplies I needed and started down the sterile hall in front of me. An odd peace settled on my shoulders as I started to stop by each room, greeting the patients and offering a little bit of hope where I could.
I saved my favorite for the last. Mr. Jackson. The grumpiest old man on the whole damn floor.
"Morning, Mr. Jackson." I checked the chart and picked up the small cup of pills before walking toward him.
"Morning yourself, fruit fly," he grumbled and covered his mouth with his hands, shaking his head.
"Come on, now. You know this will make you feel better. It always does." I reached out and brushed my fingers along his hand.
"Stop hitting on me. It's sexual harassment."
"But you’re cute." I lifted my eyebrow and tried hard not to smile.
"This is true." He dropped his hands and took the cup from me. "You know these damn pills make me have to piss like a fire hydrant, right?"
"Fire hydrants don't piss." I tilted my head to the side as a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. He was close to ninety and still giving everyone hell every chance he got.
"You kids nowadays have no damn imagination." He huffed and popped the pills into his mouth, chewing them and swallowing. He grunted and leaned back. "Those taste like shit."
I couldn't help but laugh. He said the same thing every day, did the same thing, and yet I wasn't able to keep my composure.
"Why don't you just swallow them with water like everyone else?" I took the cup from him and poured him a cup of water, which he refused.
"I need to know what's in them. If I don't chew them, I don't know." He shrugged and tugged his covers up toward his throat. "Now, get out. I'm in the middle of my favorite show."
I glanced back at the TV to find it off. "I love this one too."
"Silly girl. There's nothing on." He rolled his eyes and waved me off.
"Old people nowadays... no imagination." I turned and walked out to the sound of him cackling.
"I like you, kid. Stick around?" His voice followed me into the hall.
"I plan to," I mumbled under my breath before dropping off my tray and walking out to the smoke break area. Where I didn't smoke, I still took a few ten minute breaks to get some fresh air and clear my head. I moved out onto the patio at the back of the hospital and pulled out my phone. Olivia would be at lunch, which meant I had a few minutes to catch up with my best friend.
"Hey!" The sound of her voice caused me to release a breath I didn't realize I was holding.
"Hey. How are you?" I found a bench on the side of the hospital under several large shade trees. September in Dallas meant it was still hot as hell. Summer had very little respect for fall or even winter some years.
"I'm good. I was just thinking about your offer to come visit." I let my eyes move across the bright green and blues that accented each other beautifully in front of me.
"New York in the summer isn't much better than Texas, I'm afraid." She chuckled. "But... I would love to have you anytime you want to come."
"I'm thinking around Christmas unless you're coming back here to see your mom."
"I'm not sure what I'm going to do just yet. There is still a little bit of hope around Luke giving me a ring sometime soon." She huffed loudly.
"You don't even like him."
"Yes I do."
"Liar. You haven't sounded happy since high school and you know it." I smiled at the memories we had from high school. Growing up sucked seeing that it took away your excuse for being a relationship-idiot. I was still floundering around on the topic of making a relationship work. It would seem I was handicapped in that area, as I'd always been.
"Don't start this again. Luke and I are going to get married eventually. It just works."
"It? What's it?"
"Him and me together." She cleared her throat. "Enough about me... how are things at the hospital? You started your internship, right?"
"Yeah." I glanced back as the door opened and three nurses I didn't know walked out. "It's good. I love the work and the patients. The nurses are bitches, but I guess that happens to some people after years of working around misery. There has to be some way to protect yourself from feeling too much."
"I can see how you might get emotionally wasted by it day after day."
"I love it here." I stood up and lifted my free hand to the sky, stretching.
"And what about Cameron? How's that going?"
"Ugh," I groaned and let my hand drop. "We're still together, but it's more like roommates who are borderline tired of each other. If he mentions me going to the gym one more time, I'm likely to drop-kick him in the balls."
"Ouch. He's still doing that shit?"
"Yes, and the other day, he packed me a bag of carrots and grapes for lunch." I shook my head and walked back toward the hospital.
"Just carrots and grapes?" She laughed.
"Yes. Obviously I need to shave. I look like a fucking bunny rabbit to him." I rolled my eyes and tried to ignore the glares I got from the three women puffing away to my left. Why everyone had to dump on the interns was beyond me. It would have made more sense that they support and help those of us just starting our careers, but that wasn't at all the experience I'd been given.
"You need to drop him, Dana."
"Maybe, but being lonely is worse than being chastised all the time, or at least today it still is." I figured when I got fed up with Cameron's not so subtle hints about me losing weight that I would either lose the weight or tell him to fuck off. One or the other was soon to happen with the way things were going lately.
"Come here to New York when you graduate in May. We can get an apartment together and-"
"You're getting married, silly." I pushed the door open and walked into the coolness of the hospital. "I gotta go. I'll call you later. Go make some money in that big investment firm you're sure to be running soon."
"All right. Call me later though. It's all going to work out."
"I agree. I just wish I could see around the edges of what's to come so I could prepare a little better."
"Where is the fun in that?"
"Very true. Love you." I dropped the call, slipped my phone back into my pocket and turned the corner to hear Amanda cry out again. The sound of her wailing filled the hall. "What the hell?"
I jogged toward the open door, wondering why the sedatives didn't calm her down, but then again it was my assumption that she'd been given a sedative and not something else. I walked in to find Jackie standing on the other
side of the bed, her face pale, eyes wide.
Amanda's brother was bent over the bed, rubbing her long brown hair back and trying to soothe her with his promise that everything would be okay, but it wouldn't... it couldn't...
"Move," I mumbled to Jackie and took her spot on the other side of the thrashing girl. She was a year younger than me, but she looked ten years older. "Amanda. Look at me."
I reached out and gripped her chin, turning her and forcing her to look at me.
"Hey. Be careful with her." Her brother's voice was sharp, condescending.
I ignored him and smiled down at her. "Remember what we talked about yesterday? Old Mr. Jackson?"
She panted as her eyes moved about wildly, but she stopped thrashing for a minute.
Releasing the tight hold I had on her, I leaned down and pressed my elbows to the bed beside her, leaning my chin on my balled up fists. "You should have seen him this morning. He chewed up those damn pills again."
Her brother took a few steps back and let out a shaky breath. I wanted to glance up and get a good look at him, but she needed me to remain locked on her for a little while longer.
"No w-w-water?" She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as tears spilled down into her hair. "I'm scared."
"I know, sweetheart." I leaned forward and pressed my forehead to the side of her head like I would do my older sister when life had dealt her a shitty blow. "I'm right here, though. Your brother is here, the nurses are here, hell, old man Jackson is still here. We're not going anywhere."
A soft sob left her, and I glanced up and locked eyes with her brother, motioning for him to come closer.
He moved in and bent over, wrapping her in a tight hug and tucking her face into the side of his neck as she cried softly. The moment wasn't mine to have, so I moved back and wiped my eyes before moving out of the room. I wasn't sure I'd seen a more stunning man in my life.
Messy brown hair, strong shoulders, sensual lips and deep green eyes. My heart fluttered in my chest as I pressed my back to the closed door.
Of course he was gorgeous... As if I needed another thing to fantasize about. As if I had a choice now.
Chapter 3
Kendal
The dark-haired beauty that calmed Mandy walked out of the room, and I was grateful for the quiet. My baby sister slipped into a restful sleep as I brushed my hand down the back of her hair and rocked her as best I could. Every part of me hurt for her, longed for a way to transfer my good health to her and let me take on her disease for her. It wasn't going to happen, but it didn't stop me from wanting it.
I laid her down and moved back from the bed as my heart ached in my chest. She was the perfect replica of our mother at twenty-four. Long brown hair and green eyes, pale skin and a huge smile that pulled everyone in to see what she had to say. Too bad I hadn't seen it for the last two to three years.
I glanced over my shoulder, wanting to chase down the nurse that had the power to calm my sister. I needed to thank her, and truth be told, I wanted to study her unabashed. Her long dark hair was a beautiful accent to her tanned skin and hazel eyes. She had to have been a head shorter than me, but not petite. Her curves were feminine and thick. I took a shaky breath as my body reacted in ways that were less than appropriate in the middle of a hospital room where my sister was suffering. Shame crashed into me, and I turned and walked out into the hallway, just needing a minute to gather my thoughts.
"Kendal?"
I turned at the sound of my sister's best friend's voice. "Terri, it's good to see you."
Lies. Terri was the last person on the face of the planet that I wanted to run into. She'd been Amanda's best friend since they were in grade school, and where I was more than grateful for her loving my sister, she wanted to love me too, and not in ways that I could return the favor. Having slept with her a few times over the last five years, she was hopeful that something would start between us, but that was impossible seeing that I planned to avoid her for the rest of my days.
"It's good to see you too." She extended her arms and I couldn't deny her a quick hug. "You look incredible."
"You do too." I tried to ignore the neediness in her eyes.
"Thanks. I've been working out." She moved back and turned around slowly.
I gave her a tight smile and ran my fingers through my hair. "Mandy's having a hard day today. I left her in there sleeping, but she's losing feeling in her arms."
"Oh no. That's horrible." She pressed her hand to the center of my chest. "I'm going to go in and spend some time with her unless you wanted a little more time to yourselves?"
"No, I'm going to go up to the college for a while. I'll tell the nurses if they need me to just call." I glanced around, hoping to find the pretty girl that had the power to calm my sister with only a few words.
"I'm sure they know that." She chuckled as I turned back to her. The subtle shift in her expression let me know she was moving from a friendly encounter to asking me out... again. "I was thinking maybe we could have a drink sometime. You know... talk about what the plans are for Mandy after she gets back out of here?"
There. The pretty brunette who had my stomach tightening walked toward me with a smile on her face. She was nothing less than stunning, and yet the way she carried herself told me quickly that she didn't think much of herself.
"I'd love to, but I can't." I licked my lips as a thought filled my mind.
"Why not? It's been two years, Kendal. We were so good together. Don't you-"
"Hey, Terri, this is Dana." I reached for the nurse’s hand, grateful that her name tag was evident. "We've been dating for about six months. She's been taking great care of Mandy. Have you gotten the chance to meet her?"
If the nurse was surprised, she hid it well. I wrapped my arm around her narrow shoulders and smiled down at her. Fuck she was hot.
"Um... no." Terri extended her hand. "I'm Mandy's best friend. Are you new here?"
"Somewhat." She shook Terri's hand and slid her arm around the back of my waist as she glanced back up at me. "Did you get her to go to sleep?"
"Yeah. She fell asleep while I was holding her. How did you-"
"Well, I'm going to leave you two to it... whatever it is." Terri turned and walked into Mandy's hospital room.
I released the pretty girl and tried hard not to breathe in deeply. It would have been more than obvious that I was the creep of the century for trying to smell more of her perfume.
"How did you get her to calm down?" I turned to face her and let my eyes run down the front of her beautiful body as she glanced down the hall as if expecting someone to catch us in something inappropriate.
"What was that all about first?" She turned back to me and smiled.
My cock twitched in my slacks, and for the first time in a really long time, my pulse spiked. Ana. She reminded me of Ana more than I cared to admit. With the flood of hormones came the pain of loss.
"I just needed to get her off my back. She's Mandy's best friend and hits on me every time I see her. She's too young for me, and honestly... I'm not interested."
"But you slept with her?" The girl lifted her eyebrow.
I laughed. "Why would you think that?"
"It's obvious." She crossed her arms over her chest, accentuating just how full her breasts were. Need pulsed through me as my mouth grew dry. How nice it would be to make love to a woman and feel her body bend to my will, to touch her and taste her in ways that left her begging for more. There wasn't much I wasn't willing to do for the girl I took to my bed, but it had been too long, and I was almost too needy. Damon would have had a field day giving me shit over my sensitive nature should he have known about it.
"How so?" I slipped my hands into my pockets and tried to turn my attention to anything but her. I failed in my efforts and decided flirting wouldn't be a bad thing necessarily.
"I could just tell." She shrugged. "Your sister is a great girl. I'm sorry for all she's going through."
My bravado waned a little. "Yeah
. It's been a long life for her."
"You as well." She tilted her head to the side a little. "Are you always having to fend off women?"
I chuckled. "More often than I care to discuss with a beautiful stranger."
Her cheeks colored pink as she glanced toward the nurses’ station. "I'm not a stranger. We've been dating for six months, right? Did I get that part right?"
The desire to reach out and touch her face drove through my center. "Six months, two weeks, three days and two hours."
"Wow. You're a romantic, aren't you? Do you bring flowers?"
"Only if I want sex." I lifted my eyebrow and chuckled as she gave me a look.
"You're as corrupt as the next guy."
"Maybe, but I like to think not."
"Well, it was nice to meet you, Mr. Tarrington." She extended her hand and studied me in a way that made me want to open up and share with her whatever she was after to find.
"Kendal. Nice to meet you, Dana." I gripped her hand softly and breathed in subtly. "How long have you been a nurse here at Memorial?"
"Now you're just stalling." She laughed and pulled her hand from mine. "Have a nice day."
"No flirting? No date? No hitting on me?" I couldn't help but tease her.
"Heavens no." She turned and walked down the hall, not looking back at me as I'd hoped she would. The thick swell of her ass filled up her scrubs in a way that had my body reacting violently. I needed to get laid. Here I was hitting on the youngest girl in the hospital like the idiot I was. For some reason I had a bend toward finding women that were all wrong for me in the worst of ways.
"Why not?" I hated myself for asking.
"Because you expect me to, Kendal." She turned the corner as I let out a long sigh and pulled my keys from my pocket. I had no clue who she was other than her name, but for the first time in a long time, I wanted to.
I walked to my car languidly as thoughts of Ana filled my mind. It was going to be beyond unfair to every woman I took to my bed, because they all became Ana. Where I wasn't in love anymore, the memory of what might have been filled every part of my mind. I wanted a partner in life that I could adore, dote on, spend endless amounts of time with and still want more. One time would never be enough, one more kiss would fall short, one more dance would leave me yearning. Ana had promised to be all of that and more.