Fixation

  I didn’t need Jaguar Boy’s warning hand tugging at mine to slow to a halt at the archway. I was on the far side of paranoid even before I heard the hateful sultry tones of Anani coming from what could either be a few feet or a hundred feet away. There was no way to tell what the dimensions of the former room might be any more. So I moved cautiously under the archway, trying to ignore the snakes as I did so, and kept hidden in the shadowed depths of the trees and foliage. I tried to move as silently as the Jaguars, watching for branches and anything else that might crunch beneath my feet and give me away to Anani.

  The further into the “room” we moved, the louder her voice became until, as I paused behind a short tree with palm fronds the size of ironing boards, her words became clear.

  “Why won’t you join me, my love?” she said in the petulant tone of someone used to getting her own way. The petulance was mixed with genuine hurt, a little girl told no for the first time in her life.

  “You know why I won’t, Anani.”

  Balam! He was alive!

  I gave a sharp intake of breath, clapping a hand over my mouth as soon as I did it, praying Anani didn’t hear me. Fortunately she was too busy with her own particular drama to notice. I very cautiously moved one of the palm fronds aside and peered out onto the clearing where the silver and black whirlwind still spiraled above the cauldron, intermittent flashes of lightning spiking through it. Anani stood there in all her naked glory, gazing at Balam, who stood motionless in front of her, expression impassive.

  Jaguar Warrior lay motionless on the ground where Anani had blasted him, Jaguar Youth also prone at the opposite edge of the clearing. Looking around I found Jaguar Shaman lying on his side less than a foot away from my palm frond hiding place. Dropping to my knees, I reached out a hand and rested it on his massive frame until I felt the slow but steady rise and fall of his breath. Out for the count, but still alive–or whatever the equivalent of “alive” was for a spirit guardian.

  Reassured, I turned back to Balam and Bitch Queen.

  “Is it because of that stupid little girl I disposed of?”

  Balam’s growl blended in with those of Jaguar Boy and Baby, hunkered down behind the fronds next to me. Banked fury simmered in his voice as he replied, “That is one reason.”

  Anani gave a harsh laugh. “She is nothing, Balam. She has power, yes, but nothing compared to mine. There is nothing she can give you that I cannot.” She stepped forward, body swaying sinuously like a cobra. “And there are many things I can”—she ran a long-nailed finger down his chest—“and will do for you that she won’t.”

  Oh yeah?

  My eyes narrowed. I was so taking this bitch down.

  Balam took a deliberate step backwards away from Anani’s touch. “I am not interested in anything you have to give.”

  Anani’s eyes flared with rage. She did not like rejection, our Miss Mesoamerican Sex Bomb. “Rejecting me is a mistake, my lover.”

  “You have taken from me the things and people I care about the most. You have nothing I want.”

  “You have everything to gain by joining me. You would rule the world at my side. What’s one insignificant girl compared to ultimate power?”

  Balam didn’t move, but suddenly he seemed to grow in height. The air shimmered around him like heat waves in the desert. Even in defeat he still radiated power and it was easy to see why Anani was so intent on swaying him to her side.

  “Ruling a world of darkness? To what end? You are insane, Anani. Insane and stupid.”

  Way to piss her off, Balam, I thought even as I silently applauded his words.

  Anani rocked back as if slapped. Disbelief warred with fury at Balam’s rejection. “You dare?” she hissed, little sparks of uncontrolled magic flaring off her in her rage.” Grabbing the leather bag from her belt, she held it aloft. “I hold your power in my hand. Without it, you are nothing. Without me you are nothing! Nothing!”

  And there it was. I saw the bag and knew what I had to do.

  There was a flash as Anani sent Balam flying with a flick of her hand. “I will cast your spirit out to join the rest of your worthless shaman brothers,” she ranted, raising her hand to blast him again.

  I looked down at Jaguar Boy and Jaguar Baby.

  Will you help me?

  They both grinned those adorable toothy cat grins. Then, before I had time to tell them what I wanted, Jaguar Boy leapt out of the foliage and charged across the clearing towards Anani, Jaguar Baby at his heels.

  Before Anani had time to do more than give a startled shriek, Jaguar Boy sprang into the air, transforming into half boy/half jaguar as he landed on her, claws slashing. She screamed and fell backwards, hands going up to protect her face. The leather bag dropped to one side as Jaguar Baby joined the fray, nipping at her ankles and legs.

  This was my chance and I couldn’t afford to screw it up.

  Leaping over Jaguar Shaman, I dashed towards Anani, running faster than I’d ever moved in my life, yet it still seemed as though it were in slow-motion, as if I was running through thick sand. I saw Anani struggle to a sitting position, casting Jaguar Boy off with one of her power flares. I winced as he hit the ground, but he rolled back up to his feet without pause and charged back towards her, zigzagging as he ran so her hastily flung flares missed him. He leapt over her head at the last minute, distracting her long enough for me to cover most of the remaining distance without hindrance.

  I resisted the temptation to check on Balam as I ran past his fallen body towards Anani, whose eyes widened in disbelief as she saw me hauling ass in her direction. She raised her hands to blast me, but Jaguar Baby growled fiercely and sprang at her throat, making sure she needed all her attention to keep him from ripping it out.

  I used these precious seconds to leap over her and scoop up the leather bag from the ground where it had fallen, running up the stairs of the ziggurat to the dais next to Evaki’s cauldron. There I stood, panting for breath, the bag clutched tightly in my grip.

  Anani finally succeeded in peeling Jaguar Baby off of her, throwing him off with a curse. He scampered up the ziggurat to my side, grinning happily as if this had been the world’s best game ever.

  On the ground, Balam stirred, shaking his head groggily. I almost shut my eyes in pure relief, but didn’t dare take my gaze off of Anani. Bleeding from multiple scratches, including one marring one perfect cheekbone, she rose to her feet, radiating a lethal fury that made her previous anger seem like a child’s tantrum. And the focus of this atomic level of pissed-offedness was me.

  “You have something that belongs to me, little cat. You will give it back.” Her voice was low, dangerous.

  “No.”

  “You. Will. Give. It. Back!”

  I shuddered beneath the raw power of her words. It took every ounce of my own force of will to say, “The contents of this bag are not yours. You stole them. You have no right to them.”

  Anani’s eyes narrowed. I was sure she was about to open a can of major league Mesoamerican whup-ass on me, but then suddenly she laughed, the sound filled with genuine amusement.

  “Now perhaps I see why my Balam is so enamored of you, little cat. There is more to you than meets the eye.”

  “Maya...?” Balam’s voice was weak.

  “Yeah, it’s me,” I called to him, not taking my eyes off Anani. Then I said, “And he’s not ‘your Balam’ anymore.” Okay, not the most politic thing to say, but I couldn’t help it.

  The amusement vanished, replaced by naked hatred. I’d definitely hit a nerve and knew that inside all of the hoodoo power ansd light show, Anani was a woman scorned by her lover and she blamed me. I was so gonna be toast if I didn’t do something quickly.

  Anani cocked her head to one side, studying me like a science student sizing up a frog the best place to start the dissection. “So you have the totems. What will you do with them?”

  Good question. I hadn’t thought that far ahead.

  I looked at Jaguar Boy for guidance. H
e cocked his head to one side. Looked at me. Looked at the cauldron. Jaguar Baby pawed my ankle and nudged me, also looking at Evaki’s cauldron.

  “I will take your body, little cat,” Anani purred. “I took it once. I can take it again. And this time ... I won’t give it back. And Balam will do anything I want. If you are lucky, I will let you watch.”

  She wasn’t bluffing. Even though I held the totems in my hand, she was still powerful behind imagining. I could feel her poking and prodding at my mind, seeking to untether it from its moorings and send my spirit into the ether again. Only this time I’d never get my body back.

  No fucking way.

  I threw the bag with the totems into Evaki’s cauldron like a slam dunk in a basketball game. They caught in the vortex, swirling around and around until they vanished into the depths of the cauldron. I heard Anani howl in fury as the bag disappeared.

  I looked at Balam as he lay on the ground, powerless to do anything against her. He stared at me in agonized helplessness, knowing that soon he would be nothing but a pawn for Anani’s crazy-ass megalomaniacal plans.

  I could spare him that.

  And I would.

  Anani’s psychic claws dug into my mind as she started to rip my spirit from my body in preparation to take over my body for the second and final time. I felt my very essence start to detach from my physical being—

  And threw myself into the cauldron.

  The last thing I heard as the world exploded into a white-hot flame beyond imagining was Balam screaming my name.

  Then there was nothing.

  Chapter Twenty

  At first I floated in emptiness. A great, vast sea of nothingness. I didn’t mind. It was very soothing, kind of like being in a sensory deprivation tank. It didn’t strike me the least bit strange that I was conscious of being surrounded by nothingness. Stranger things had happened over the last few days. At least, I thought they had. I didn’t really remember much of anything and didn’t care. I felt unbelievably mellow, so relaxed I barely even registered relief at being alive.

  After I didn’t know how much time had passed, sensation started returning to my body. Just a little bit at a time, little prickles and tingles in my limbs, kind of like when your foot or hand falls asleep and the blood starts circulating again. I let it happen without forcing it, enjoying the feeling of warmth moving through me. I was not in any particular hurry to move.

  Maya.

  I heard my name. Although maybe it was more accurate to say I felt my name. I knew the voice was feminine, although how I knew I couldn’t tell you.

  Maya, my daughter. Wake up.

  Whoever it was, she spoke in a language I didn’t recognize at all, yet totally understood.

  Well, heck. I opened my eyes with reluctance and saw a lot of light. So much, in fact, I hastily shut my eyes again, afraid of being blinded.

  Open your eyes, my daughter. You will not be harmed.

  I knew the voice was telling the truth so I opened my eyes again, blinking a few times before my sight finally adjusted to the brightness around me.

  I was lying on the ground in what looked like an endless field of soft mossy grass surrounded by a golden radiance that shimmered and flickered, little tongues of flame licking at the edges. The light warmed me from head to toe, bathing me in the kind of well being I get after a particularly good massage. I felt strong, invigorated. Energy thrummed through my body and mind.

  I sat up, stretched and looked above me—

  --where a funnel of silver and black spiraled around and around straight up into the sky.

  Realization hit as the floodgates of my memory opened and the events of the last few days came roaring back.

  I was in Evaki’s cauldron and I was still alive. Or, at least, something closely resembling that state.

  You are alive, my daughter. Your selfless act of bravery for the sake of your world and for another one of my children pleases me greatly.

  Unless I was totally mistaken, I was having a mind-meld chat with the goddess Evaki herself.

  I heard/felt a ripple of laughter. You guess correctly. You have won the loyalty and affection of two of my most reserved guardians—”

  I snorted. I couldn’t help it. “You mean Jaguar Baby and Jaguar Boy? They’re about as reserved as kittens on catnip.”

  They are not always so. Underestimating them has been the downfall of many who would enter my realm without my consent.

  I thought of the violence of their attack on Anani and nodded.

  “So if I can ask ... why aren’t I burned up to a crisp and all that?”

  You sacrificed yourself willingly. Those who do so with a pure motive are reborn.

  “Am I still me?”

  Your essence is still the same, but your potential has been realized. You will find yourself anything you want to be when you return to your world. Remember this when you are confronted with Anani for the last time.

  There was a brief pause. Then: You hold the heart of one of my shamans in your hands. Treat it well.

  I nodded. That would be an easy promise to keep.

  And now, before you leave, I ask that you return that which belongs to the others whose spirits have been trapped here by that witch who would dare to take what is mine.” There was a soft thud as something fell to the ground by my feet. I knelt and picked up Anani’s leather bag. Opening it, I removed seven different totem figures, including Balam’s.

  “How do I return them?”

  In answer, there was a series of shimmers in the air around me. Suddenly six men of varying ages appeared in front of me, two in loose cotton pants, several in loinclothes and the rest buck-naked. I was so far past embarrassment at this point it didn’t even faze me.

  They all looked at me expectantly. I opened my hands to reveal the totems and their faces lit up with a radiance that rivaled the walls of Evaki’s cauldron.

  As each one took his totem from my hands, he would incline his head in thanks before stepping back to make way for the next shaman. I felt like Dorothy – or maybe the Wizard? It had been a while since I’d seen the movie-- handing out goodies from her bag at the end of The Wizard of Oz.

  The last shaman took his totem, leaving only Balam’s in my cupped hands. I closed one fist around it and wondered what was next. I didn’t have long to wait.

  All six shamans lifted their hands skyward and said something in unison before pulling their hands downwards in an abrupt yanking motion. The whirling dervish of silver and black power suddenly began to lower itself to the ground.

  A rushing noise flooded my ears as the tip of the funnel touched down on the ground near us. I could feel the power of wind sucking me towards it, my white skirt whipping around me with no regard for modesty. Several of the shamans checked me out. One of them winked at me. Then, one by one, they all stepped into the funnel, spiraling up and away into an ebony darkness at the mouth of the cauldron far above.

  Your turn, Maya.

  “There’s no place like home,” I muttered.

  Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward and entered the whirlwind, spinning around and around, up and up, in an exhilarating rush. The world roared around me in a vortex of sound and motion as the energy of the storm vibrated through me, become part of me. I suddenly realized the vastness of my own potential and laughed with the sheer joy that came with the knowledge I call the power of lighnting to me and ride the very winds themselves.

  I would never be impressed with a rollercoaster again.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  I’m not sure what I expected as far as grand entrances once I left Evaki’s cauldron. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure how I got out of the whirlwind in the first place. The last minute or so was one big blur. But all of a sudden I just found myself standing in front of Evaki’s cauldron again, still clutching Balam’s totem in one hand and wondering what my hair looked like after my wild ride.

  Everyone was still pretty much in the same place and position they’d been right before I�
�d thrown myself into the cauldron: Anani glaring up at the cauldron still dripping blood; Balam lying on the ground, Jaguar Boy a few feet behind him; and Jaguar Baby crouched at the dais. This made me think this was one of those ”different passages of time” situations, like mortals who wander into a fairy mound and lose a century or two.

  Me, on the hand?

  Oh, things had changed.

  I could feel raw power coursing through my body, as if lightning had taken the place of the blood flowing through my veins. I looked down at my hands and wondered at the sparks of blue fire crackling from my fingertips.

  Balam’s face lit up when he saw me. Jaguar Baby capered in glee, chasing his tail and making that funny burbling, chuckling noise of his.

  Anani, on the other hand, looked at me with a hatred that should have melted me where I stood.

  “You stupid little bitch,” she hissed. “I have had enough of you!” She raised her hands, firing magical mojo at me with both barrels. Without even thinking, I waved one hand in front of me and deflected her puny fire harmlessly off into the trees.

  “William Shatner had a much better line delivery in Star Trek III,” I said observed. “Plus, he won. You’re not going to win.” I stared at Anani, letting her see the power that was now mine, holding my hands up and letting raw energy play in my palms.

  Read it and weep, bitch.

  Her expression registered uncertainty for the first time since I’d had the misfortune to know her.

  “No!” Anani shot another bolt of magical fire at me. I laughed and batted it aside with ease. I could have hit her with fire of my own, but I chose not to.

  “You can’t win, you know,” I said, walking down the ziggurat to the ground and approaching her.

  Anani flung another bolt at me and shrieked, “I will destroy you!”

  “No,” I replied calmly. “You won’t.” I let the fire run through me as I walked steadily towards her, my entire body outlined with blue flame like the Human Torch. “You are finished. No one here wants what you have to sell.”