“Come now. You owe me a whole lot more than that, don’t you?” He took a step closer to her and she backed up.
“I’m committed to the school,” she said quickly as he advanced another step, backing her against the door. “That’s all I want, to stay with the kids.”
He placed his hand on the door beside her head, leaning in uncomfortably close. “And what, I’m just supposed to—what is the expression?—put my tail between my legs? Just act like this humiliation never happened?”
“I’m sorry that everything happened this way, with all the publicity. I think there are ways to turn it around, turn it in our favor.”
There was a loud crack against the door as he slapped it with his open palm. She jumped but tried not to show any fear. It was easier than she would have thought, because she didn’t really fear him. That was the lovely part about never having really given him her heart this time around. It had stayed with Shay.
“What games are you playing, Jessica? Hmm? What more games are you playing with my business?”
“It’s our business. I know you haven’t forgotten that I own part of this school.”
He smiled tightly. “Not in writing you don’t. You only have a part in it out of my benevolence, which I can assure you is quickly waning.”
“Don’t be this way. I’m sorry I hurt you, but we can still be partners. We can still work together. For the kids.”
Staring at her for a long moment, he finally blinked and looked away. He straightened up and took a step away from her, and she could sense his mind racing, trying to figure out how he could profit from her sense of guilt.
Before he could formulate some awful proposal, there was a sharp rap on the door. She was again startled but almost immediately heard Shay’s voice.
“Jess?” he said as he turned the handle.
“Let me guess. Little drummer boy?” Anton said, rolling his eyes.
Shay opened the door and stepped halfway in. “You okay?”
Jessica nodded.
“Go ahead,” Anton said dismissively, “take her. I’m done with her.”
Shay lunged so quickly for Anton that Jessica didn’t have time to register the ensuing scuffle between the two men. She was pushed back onto the desk and heard grunting and wrestling and one punch. Then Gavin and Conor were filling the small space, pulling Shay up and with them back out of the room before she knew what had even happened.
After a moment, Anton stood up. The corner of his mouth was bloody and he wiped at it with the back of his hand as he looked at her.
“I didn’t mean for all this to happen,” she said softly. “I loved you once, you know?”
He shook his head, no longer interested in conversation.
“Why, Anton, were we ever together? What did you see in me?”
Silence engulfed the room for so long that she finally stood up from the desk to leave. But then he spoke.
“The way you dance, Jessica. It was the grace and tenacity and pure heart in your dancing. I always saw that. I believed in you from the start. And you threw it away over that fool—the SFB director—and his careless comments. And when you came back to the city, I knew you could be a shining example for the kids of this school. Turned out you are an good a teacher as you are a dancer. That’s something.”
Compliments had always been difficult to come by with Anton, so these revelations were overwhelming. Tears came to her eyes and she had to swallow down her emotions.
“Then let me teach. I want to be a part of this, to make it a success.”
Anton again watched her for a long moment. Instead of speaking, though, he brushed past her and out of the room.
CHAPTER SIXTY-NINE
The next couple of hours were a busy scramble as Gavin and Conor took Anton aside to coax him into going along with their plan, and Jessica got to work on her side of things. While Shay waited impatiently in an empty dance studio, Jessica changed into a black leotard with spaghetti straps and a short fuchsia wrap skirt. She pulled her hair up into a smooth bun and applied stage makeup. Soon, her class of eight teenagers—four boys and four girls—arrived for their dress rehearsal. They all greeted her excitedly as she assured them that she was back for good. Shay watched the interaction with satisfaction, happy to see Jessica in her element. Her eyes shone with pride as she spoke to the students. He was struck by the fact that they were all minorities, either Hispanic or Asian, or African American. It was likely she had handpicked them for this very reason.
There was only time enough for the kids to warm up, run through the short piece they were to perform at the festival, and get into their costumes and makeup before they boarded the shuttle bus Felicity had arranged to take them to the Embarcadero. Jessica gave Shay a quick kiss and climbed onto the bus, opting to ride with her students.
The timing worked on Gavin’s side as well, as Shay watched him walk Anton to his white Mercedes CLA at the far end of the small parking lot. Gavin clapped him on the back familiarly before turning toward the car that awaited him. Shay watched as Anton got into his car and wondered what magic Gavin had devised to have established a rapport with the loathsome man.
“We ready?” Gavin asked with an easy smile.
“Em, sure,” Shay said. “But why don’t you ride in my car and fill me in on a few things.”
Gavin nodded amiably and got into the waiting Lexus. Shay followed him and soon their trail of vehicles was headed back toward where they had come.
“What is it you’ve masterminded, then?” Shay asked.
“That’s too strong a word, for sure. I’ve just helped our friend Anton see how things can work to his advantage.”
“Spell it out.”
“I made it clear to him that it would be to his benefit to help smooth all this over. Because we are now headed to meet a very highly regarded journalist and photographer that are keen to supply some good publicity for his school. Only catch is that he has to play along. He has to turn the tables and say he was the one that didn’t want to let go, but now he understands that you and Jessica were never really done. And he has to, in his own way, give his blessing to you two.”
“And he’s willing to do that for a spot of publicity?” Shay asked skeptically.
“No, of course not. He’s got that very large Russian ego, hasn’t he?” Gavin laughed.
“Well?”
“Oh, yeah. The deal is this: over the next four months, Anton will teach Jessica everything he can about running the school. Then he will get an offer from the Ballet de l'Opéra national de Paris for a choreography position. He will sell Jessica the rest of the business and leave the city.”
“You’ve got to be fucking with me.”
“Not this time, Seamus.”
“How on earth?”
Gavin shrugged. “I know people, man. I know a lot of fucking people, and they all seem to want to do me favors. So, I called upon a few. Does this deal work for you?”
Shay was still trying to understand all that Gavin had made happen but he nodded slowly.
“I’m glad you got your girl back. I think there’s a song in all this, don’t you?” Gavin asked.
No one had ever been the kind of friend to him that Gavin was, and Shay was having a hard time formulating the words of thanks and gratitude that were owed.
“Ah, we can play around with it when we’re back on tour,” Gavin continued.
“Gav, I don’t, em,” Shay said, swallowing hard, “I don’t know if you understand—”
“No worries, man. You’d do the same.”
“No, what I mean—”
Gavin slapped him on the knee a couple times. “We’re good. It’s all good.”
Shay nodded again. “Tell me something?”
“We don’t need to go into all—”
“It’s not about this.”
“Oh. Okay, then.”
“You remember that time you took me out joy riding?”
Gavin grinned. “We had some times, didn’t we?”
“But that one time when you came round just as Danny Boy and I were headed out. You were bloody insistent on getting me to change the plan, to go with you instead.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Did you know where he and I were going? What I was going to get myself into?”
There was only a slight hesitation before Gavin nodded. “You know Danny Boy. He can’t keep his mouth shut. He had been bragging about bringing you into the scene. I couldn’t let that happen. Couldn’t lose my drummer.”
Shay looked down as he took in confirmation of what he had always suspected. At thirteen years old, Gavin had had the presence of mind and goodness of heart to help him when he hadn’t even realized he needed it.
“How can I thank you for that, Gav? How do I thank someone for saving my life?”
“You don’t,” Gavin replied. “You’re my brother, Seamus. And I’d do anything for my family.”
Still not looking at him, Shay felt the weight of that statement. They had both been damaged as kids by the people who were supposed to be their family—Gavin by the mother who abandoned him, and Shay by the parents who had never been there. But they were made whole again when they found a friendship with each other. It was amazing how two broken boys could have grown up to have known what real caring and love was despite it all.
“I’ll tell you something,” Gavin said, “you may be moving stateside, but I still expect you to be Daisy’s godfather, you know?”
Shay looked at Gavin in surprise now. He thought Conor would have taken that role. But at the same time, the idea of being a part of Gavin’s newly formed family in this way felt right. They were friends without any reservations or history of betrayal. Gavin would reward that.
“I’d love to,” Shay said.
“You know me, there won’t be any religious ceremony,” Gavin said with a laugh. “So, consider it done.”
Shay smiled. “Got it.”
They were nearing the Embarcadero now. The spot where they would all gather was at a spit of a park called Rincon. It was right on the waterfront and its defining feature was a huge art installation called Cupid’s Span. The sixty-foot-high fiberglass and steel drawn bow and arrow plunging into the ground was a nod to San Francisco’s romantic reputation. With it positioned between the iconic cityscape and the Bay Bridge, and with the afternoon light approaching that magic hour, the spot was perfect for their photography shoot.
“Gav?”
Gavin was staring out the window, distracted by his own thoughts now. “Hmm?”
“How’s that fatherhood thing feel?”
He turned to Shay with a smile. “It’s the most amazing thing, Seamus. It’s the fiercest, sweetest love you’ll ever feel. Nothing else compares to it. I highly recommend you work on that for yourself. You’d be good at it.”
Shay wondered about that sometimes. He worried he might have inherited whatever inferior genes his parents had that allowed them to function at such a low level. At this stage in his life, however, he had to admit that he had very likely escaped that fate. And with Jessica by his side, he could ensure there was no doubt about that.
CHAPTER SEVENTY
Felicity was waiting for them with the equipment she’d sourced, and was accompanied by Danny Boy, Rolling Stone magazine’s John Riley and photographer Gloria Nuñez. Introductions were made all around as Gavin returned to his naturally gregarious self. He and John reminisced about the wild times they shared years earlier when the reporter had traveled with the band on tour for an in-depth piece. Conor examined and tuned the acoustic guitar Felicity had somehow procured, while Shay and Danny Boy worked to get portable speakers set up and connected to Jessica’s phone. As this was going on, Jessica had her students prepare to rehearse their piece of Helgi Tomasson’s ballet 7 for Eight.
As the Artistic Director of the San Francisco Ballet, Tomasson had choreographed the ballet in 2004, setting it to seven movements for eight dancers, and using four Bach concerti. Jessica’s students would perform a short piece of it at the Stern Grove Festival, prior to a full performance by the San Francisco Ballet.
The concept of the photo shoot was to showcase the diversity and skill of the students in this unique setting. The story Riley would write pushed their unique connection—through Jessica—to Rogue. It would talk about fostering the special artistic spark especially vital to youth who were trying to find their place in the world, whether it be through a love of music, dance or some other medium. A sidebar would paint a sweet picture of Shay and Jessica’s relationship, along with a conciliatory quote from Anton about the enduring power of art and love. He would hint at his “regret” that his relationship with Jessica had been officially over for some time and wish her well. Anton’s presence at the photoshoot would send the message that he approved of the way things now were, including Jessica’s reunion with Shay.
“Let’s get started,” Jessica said. She looked to Shay who was in control of playing back the Bach.
“When you’re ready,” he told her.
She hesitated, looking to Anton who gave her the slightest nod of approval. “Ready,” she said, with renewed confidence. Though she wasn’t to be a part of the dance, Gavin had wanted her to dress the part, including wearing pointe shoes. His vision was that the magazine spread would include a photo of her instructing the students as it would further introduce her to the world.
Though the concrete was not a suitable dance floor and would, in fact, tear up all the dancers’ ballet shoes, the performance made for a striking event. The photographer circled the group as the music played, getting shots from all angles as the afternoon light cast a warm glow upon them. Soon, crowds gathered, watching at first with amusement and then with appreciation. The growing audience applauded after each run through of the mini performance, so fixated on the spectacle that they didn’t realize three of the band members of Rogue were watching along with them.
It was only after the photographer was satisfied with what she’d taken and things were breaking up, that Conor pulled the acoustic guitar from its case and began strumming. Slowly and indiscriminately at first, then with more purpose. The crowd tittered upon the realization of what was happening as the song turned into a paired down version of “Start Again.” There were screams of delight as Gavin began singing with infectious joy, and Anton took this as his cue to leave. He had fulfilled his part of the bargain so far and would do no more.
Shay, sitting on a short stone wall, watched Gavin and Conor and wished he could join in. He settled for enjoying the moment as a fan. That is, until Jessica made her way to him on pointe, putting a funky twist on the elegant tiptoeing to go along with the rhythm. She stayed in front of him, swaying her hips and arms and legs in eye-catching contemporary ballet moves as Gavin sang about not starting over but starting again. When she bent slightly at the waist and beckoned for Shay to join her with a wiggle of her finger, he smiled but didn’t move.
Conor sensed the moment and in addition to strumming his guitar, alternated slapping the body of it to pick up the beat. Soon the crowd around them was clapping in time.
Jessica held out her hand and pouted when Shay still hesitated. When the crowd started shouting random encouragement, he finally got up and was rewarded with cheers. Shaking his head, he stood, unsure what to do with an audience like this. But Jessica pointed from her eyes to his and he did as she commanded, focusing on her alone. She kept a hand on his bicep as she stretched out one leg in a graceful arc, winding it around his waist long enough to elicit howls.
That woke Shay. He took control then, holding her hand above her head and sending her in one pirouette after another before guiding her into a dip. She turned the dip into a back handstand, from which she lowered herself into the splits. Shay reached down to help her up, but pulled her with what seemed like enough force to send her flying into his arms in a move that wowed not only the crowd but him. It was all Jessica’s doing. She was strong and elegant and conveyed effortlessness even though she was working in
credibly hard. He gently put her down and she was once again on pointe, but coaxing him to dance with her as if they were in a club, their bodies pressed together and moving as one. She worked the move into something sexy and alluring, with eyes only for him.
When the song ended, Jessica’s smile was all he could see. She was pure joy and there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for her. Even dance in front of a hundred strangers on the Embarcadero. The clicking of Nuñez’s camera, and the clapping and begging for more from the crowd was muted to his ears. Nothing else mattered except this moment with Jessica so triumphant and happy in his arms. It didn’t occur to him that Gavin had worked this out in advance with Jessica, having picked her brain for the ways in which the couple most connected. His manipulation of the day’s events had been masterful, and would lead to a captivating Rolling Stones cover photo that encapsulated the afternoon. The shot managed to capture Jessica in Shay’s arms as her students looked on in the unfocused background on one side while Gavin and Conor were visible on the other side.
CHAPTER SEVENTY-ONE
It wasn’t until midway through their celebratory group dinner at an Italian restaurant in the city’s North Beach district that Shay noticed Danny Boy retreating into himself. The table was loud and overflowing with wine and bread and pasta along with good cheer, especially from the students who had been surprised to be invited to join them. John Riley and Gloria Nuñez were there, too, though in a friendly rather than professional capacity.
The afternoon had come off better than Shay had dared to hope. He and Jessica hadn’t stopped holding each other in one way or another since that dance ended. The high of that moment had lingered and then been replaced by the good food, drink, and company at the restaurant. But when Shay looked at his brother now, he saw the tell-tale signs of him itching for some sort of escape. At first it would be this turning in on himself, but soon it would involve a hunt for something more. Danny Boy had fed those urges in the last few months with random acting out that seemed to have come from no rational plan, like stealing Conor’s guitar. And showing up at Conor’s house before dawn. And climbing a lighting rig in the middle of a concert. Shay could sense something more was coming. He just had to try to prevent it, to provide some kind of distraction to steer him away from giving in to whatever demons were pulling at him.
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