Star Wars - Adventures in Hyperspace 002 - Shinbone Showdown

by Ryder Windham

“Only if you promise not to leave me here… sir.”

  Han picked up TC-72’s head. As the droid began apologizing to the farmer, Chewbacca stepped down from the Falcon’s landing ramp. The Wookiee saw the decapitated droid, and then noticed how all four Gamorreans were glaring at Han. Chewbacca barked a question.

  “No, Chewie. Everything’s under control. But if you’re done loading the cargo, give me a hand with the droid, I hate to admit it, but she just saved my neck.”

  As the Millennium Falcon rose away from the planet Gamorr, Chewbacca threw back his head and let out a braying laugh.

  Seated in the cockpit beside Chewbacca, Han shook his head with disbelief. “You knew the farmer was a female? And you didn’t tell me?”

  Chewbacca’s laugh became a honking bark.

  “Yeah, really funny,” Han muttered as he adjusted the flight controls. “If the farmer had taken my head off instead of the droid’s that would have been a riot.”

  The Falcon left Gamorr’s atmosphere and entered space. A few minutes later, Chewbacca angled the ship toward the nearest hyperspace portal. Han said, “Coordinates are set for the jump to Tatooine?”

  Chewbacca nodded. Han pressed a switch to activate the Falcon’s hyperdrive. Outside the cockpit, the surrounding stars appeared to suddenly elongate and extend past the ship. But just as the Falcon leaped into hyperspace, a loud crash of metal echoed from the main hold.

  Han said, “Didn’t you tell me the passengers were belted in?”

  Chewbacca answered with a moaning bark.

  “Well, putting the Gamorreans in the main hold wasn’t my idea,” Han said as he scrambled out of his seat. “The droid said she’d make sure they behaved themselves.”

  Chewbacca followed Han out of the cockpit, leaving the computer systems in control of the Falcon’s journey. As they ran through the passage tube that led to the main hold, they heard another crash from ahead. Although they had dealt with many problems on their ship before, neither was prepared for the sight that waited for them.

  Chewbacca had reattached TC-72’s head to her body just before liftoff from Gamorr. He was surprised to find her body once again headless, but still belted into the seat beside the engineering station where he’d left it. As for the three Gamorrean guards, all three had left the curved seat beside the hologame table.

  One Gamorrean had broken through a modular wall panel to get to the shipment of snoruuks in the freight-loading room, and let loose a few hundred snoruuks. The other two Gamorreans were playing catch with TC-72’s head.

  Han gasped. “My ship!”

  And then Chewbacca noticed the hologame table’s surface was cracked.

  The outraged Wookiee roared.

  Chewbacca’s roar startled the Gamorreans. TC-72’s head fell past one Gamorrean’s outstretched hands and landed upon a cluster of moving mushrooms. Han stepped past the snoruuks and grabbed TC-72’s head. “You said the guards would behave!”

  “It appears I was mistaken,” TC-72 replied. “But I don’t believe they meant any harm. They’re relatively young Gamorreans, and still very playful.” “Playful? Have you looked at yourself lately?” Han held TC-72’s head so her photoreceptors could view the wires sticking out of the neck of her seated body.

  “Oh, my,” TC-72 said. “I believe my logic circuits have been damaged.”

  “Some help you are. How about your translator functions? Are they still working?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Tell the guards to clean up this mess,” Han said, “and if they don’t do a good job, Chewbacca will be eating roasted Gamorreans for dinner.”

  TC-72’s head translated Han’s words to the guards. The Gamorreans looked nervously at the Wookiee, then bent down and began scooping up the snoruuks as fast as they could.

  After all the snoruuks were returned to the cargo containers, Chewbacca locked the Gamorreans up in one of the Falcon’s smaller holds. He rejoined Han in the main hold. Han handed TC-72’s head to Chewbacca and said, “See if you can fix her again, so she’s in one piece when we meet Jabba.”

  Chewbacca glanced at the cracked hologame table and whimpered.

  “I’ll help you repair it later,” Han said. “But from now on, we don’t transport Gamorreans, talking droids, or walking plants.”

  Chewbacca barked in agreement.

  Jabba the Hutt was sitting in his private box at his arena on Tatooine, watching his prized gundark fight off a group of unusually large womp rats, when Han Solo and Chewbacca arrived. It was the day after the Millennium Falcon had returned from Gamorr with Jabba’s new guards and the snoruuk shipment. As Han and Chewbacca approached Jabba, they noticed TC-72 standing beside Bib Fortuna at the back of the box.

  “All right, Jabba,” Han said. “You mentioned a Wild Space job?”

  Jabba plucked a three-eyed gorg from a jar. He tossed the gorg into his mouth and swallowed it whole. Then he looked at Han and said, “As I recall, I told you I might hire you for a long-haul to Wild Space. But first, we have to settle a small matter of what you owe me for your trip to Gamorr.”

  “Excuse me? Did you just say I owe you?”

  “You heard me, Solo,” Jabba said. “You went to Gamorr because you were working for me. However, while on Gamorr, you attempted to conduct your own trade with the snoruuk farmer, who was my contact. It is my understanding that you offered her two bolts of Trevella cloth and a bantha hide.”

  “How’d you hear about —” Before Han finished his question, he suddenly knew the answer. He looked at TC-72. The droid gazed back at him and shrugged. Han sneered and said, “Well, aren’t you the chatty one?”

  Returning his attention to Jabba, Han said, “Did your droid happen to mention that your lovely Gamorrean contact had no interest in any of the stuff I was offering?”

  Jabba made a clucking sound at the back of his throat. “Han, my boy, did you read the datacard that Bib Fortuna gave to you before you left for Gamorr?”

  “Sure,” Han said. “I mean, I read most of it.”

  Jabba smiled. “Then you know I require a small fee from anyone — even friends like you — who wants permission to conduct business with my contacts.”

  “Friends, huh?” Han said. “I’m so glad we’re not enemies. So, how much is this fee of yours?”

  “Ten thousand credits,” Jabba said.

  Han and Chewbacca were stunned. Chewbacca gasped. Han said, “Ten?”

  “What can I say?” Jabba said, “I am a generous fellow! And because we are friends, I will simply deduct this sum from your next job.”

  “You’re too kind,” Han said through clenched teeth.

  Just then, a terrible screech came from the arena floor. Chewbacca’s eyes flicked to the fight below. He was glad to see the gundark now had only one opponent.

  “So tell us, Jabba,” Han continued. “What’s the Wild Space job, and how much will you pay after the deduction?”

  Jabba gestured to Bib Fortuna, who stepped forward and handed a new datacard to Han. “Deliver seeds and soil to Shinbone, and bring back some gems for me. You’ll receive five thousand credits. No haggling.”

  Han frowned at the offer. “The seeds don’t walk, do they?”

  “No,” Jabba chuckled. “No snoruuks this time. And you won’t need a translator either.”

  “Fine,” Han said as he pocketed the datacard. “Let’s go, Chewie.”

  As the Millennium Falcon traveled through hyperspace, Chewbacca grumbled.

  “I’m not happy about this job either, pal,” Han replied as he readied the ship’s controls for the hyperspace exit. “Flying for Jabba is becoming a real pain. Our ship smells like a greenhouse.”

  The smell came from the Falcon’s cargo, which included ten metric tons of soil and seeds. Chewbacca grunted, then barked a question.

  Han replied, “No, I don’t know what kind of seeds we’re delivering. I never asked.”

  The Falcon dropped out of hyperspace. The ship had arrived in orbit over the planet Shi
nbone. Shinbone was a mining colony world in the Instrop sector, part of the vast region known as Wild Space, which was mostly unexplored. Because Shinbone was far from any major hyperspace route, the journey from Tatooine had required several stops and detours.

  Han placed a datacard — the one Bib Fortuna had given him — into a slot on the navigational console, and a readout appeared on the console’s datascreen. Han said, “The shipment goes to a guy named Torkil Mux. Jabba is funding Mux’s mining operation. Mux should have fifty kilograms of gems for us to bring back to Jabba. There’s our destination.”

  Chewbacca looked at the coordinates on the datascreen, and then they began their descent.

  As the Falcon angled down through Shinbone’s atmosphere, a small object bumped against the back of Han’s right boot. “Well, look what I just found,” Han said as he picked up the object. “A stowaway!”

  Chewbacca turned his head to see Han holding a small, wiggling snoruuk.

  “I wonder what it tastes like,” Han said. He raised the snoruuk to his mouth, and was about to bite into it when Chewbacca roared angrily, startling Han.

  “Sorry, pal. Did you want the first bite?”

  The Wookiee roared again, then barked at his friend. Han replied, “You’re being ridiculous, Chewie! Snoruuks may move around, but they’re food. It’s not an intelligent creature! It’s just a wiggly mushroom.”

  Chewbacca growled and released the flight controls as he snatched the snoruuk from Han’s hand. The snoruuk had stopped moving. The Wookiee tilted his head back and let out a mournful groan.

  “Chewie, stop behaving like a —” Han gasped. “Oh, no! Look out!”

  The Falcon was diving straight toward a rocky mountaintop. Chewbacca dropped the snoruuk as Han seized the flight controls. A moment later, there was an awful cracking sound as the Falcon’s energy shields struck a stone pinnacle. The engines whined as the ship veered away from the mountain.

  Emergency lights flashed in the cockpit. “Aft port landing gear is damaged,” Han shouted as he struggled to regain control of the Falcon. “Hold tight, this is gonna be bumpy!”

  As Shinbone’s surface appeared to race up at the Falcon, Chewbacca checked a datascreen and barked at Han.

  Han looked offended. “I am heading for Torkil Mux’s mine!”

  Chewbacca activated the Falcon’s landing jets. Only five of the ship’s seven landing legs extended. Han said, “We’ll land on a slope to help balance things out.” He jockeyed the controls, guiding the ship to a touchdown on a rocky hill.

  From the cockpit, they could see a mining camp. A beat-up spaceship rested beside a small structure, and a long tent was stretched out near the mine’s entrance. Tall, slow-moving creatures with twisted, stubby legs and pale gray skin were hauling dirt and heavy stones out of the mine. The creatures paused, turning their heads to face the Falcon, but then resumed their work.

  Chewbacca looked for the snoruuk but couldn’t find it. He muttered sadly.

  “Chewie, I know that Wookiees like to take care of plants. But in case you didn’t notice, your interest in that edible fungus nearly got us killed!” Climbing out of his seat, Han added, “Come on, ya big lummox. The sooner we unload the shipment and repair the landing gear, the sooner we can leave this place.”

  Han stepped down the Falcon’s landing ramp, then moved under the elevated ship to inspect the damaged landing gear. “Aw, bantha fodder! The freight elevator hatch got hammered, too. It’ll take hours to fix!”

  Chewie joined Han to inspect the gear. Hearing footsteps, they turned to see an Arcona and a K4 security droid approach from the structure next to the beat-up spaceship. “The Arcona must be Torkil Mux,” Han said. “Stay here, Chewie, and watch my back while I talk with him.”

  While Chewbacca remained under the Falcon and kept his eyes on the security droid, Han walked up to the Arcona. “Jabba sent us for a delivery and pickup. Are you Torkil Mux?”

  “I am,” the Arcona replied with a slight bow. “You got here fast. I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow.”

  “We took some shortcuts,” Han said with a shrug.

  Looking at the Falcon, Torkil Mux asked, “Why did you land on this hill, and not closer to my camp?”

  “We, uh, had some trouble with the landing gear,” Han answered. “And we need to fix the freight elevator hatch before we can unload your soil and seeds. It’ll take a while.”

  “Take your time,” Mux said. He pointed to the long tent. “The shipment goes to the greenhouse.”

  Just then, a short gray-skinned worker began shifting away from the others. The K4 security droid noticed the creature’s movement. Turning quickly, the droid raised its blaster-rifle arm and fired.

  Watching from below the Falcon, Chewbacca saw the droid fire a stream of laserbolts into the ground in front of the short creature. The creature stopped, wobbled slightly, and then slowly shifted back toward the other workers. Chewbacca barked anxiously at Han.

  Keeping his eyes on Torkil Mux, Han called back, “Nothing to worry about, Chewie. I’m fine.” Lowering his voice, Han said casually, “Quite a setup you have here, Mux. Looks like you know how to keep your workers from stepping out of line.”

  “I couldn’t have done it without Jabba’s funding,” Mux said with a smile. “Meet me in my headquarters when you’re done, and I’ll have Jabba’s gems ready for you.”

  Torkil Mux and the K4 droid walked back to the structure that served as Mux’s headquarters. Han moved under the Falcon and returned to Chewbacca’s side. The Wookiee barked a question.

  “I don’t like the way Mux treats his workers, either, pal,” Han replied. “But for all we know, those creatures could be dangerous criminals! Anyway, it’s none of our business, and we don’t get paid to ask questions. Let’s just get the tools we’ll need to fix the hatch and landing gear.”

  It took Han and Chewbacca almost three hours to make repairs. While they worked, Chewbacca paused occasionally to watch the slow-moving laborers. He could not help feeling sorry for them.

  When the repairs were finished, Han said, “Mux should have Jabba’s gems ready for us by now. You guard the ship while I go tell him we’re ready to unload the cargo. Be right back.”

  As Han headed for Mux’s headquarters, he kept his distance from the laborers. Even though he had told Chewbacca that the creatures might be dangerous, he thought, They sure do look harmless.

  Inside Torkil Mux’s headquarters, Han found the K4 droid standing beside Mux, who was seated behind a table. On the table was a small crate filled with gems of various sizes. Mux said, “Here are Jabba’s gems. Have you unloaded the seeds and soil yet?”

  “No, not yet.” Han looked down at the gems. “According to the datacard I got from Jabba’s assistant, Jabba is expecting a lot more gems than what you’ve got here.”

  Mux sighed. “These gems are all that I’ve found on Shinbone for the past three seasons. Please remind Jabba that mining takes time.”

  “Sure, I’ll tell Jabba, but I doubt he’ll be very happy about it. Hutts aren’t known for their patience.”

  Mux sighed again. “When I get my new laborers, I’ll double my efforts. Would you like my droid to carry the gems to your ship?”

  “Thanks, but I can handle it.” Stepping out of Mux’s headquarters, crate in hand, Han thought, Mux didn’t seem very, concerned about Jabba. But that’s Mux’s problem, not mine!

  Han was carrying the crate of gems to the Falcon when he noticed movement near the greenhouse. He was astonished to see Chewbacca following the short creature that the security droid had nearly shot earlier.

  The creature led Chewbacca into the greenhouse. Han was about to call out to his friend when he heard the Wookiee howl.

  Han dropped the gem-filled crate. By the time it hit the ground he’d already drawn his blaster and was sprinting toward his friend. Holding his blaster in front of him, he entered the greenhouse fast.

  He found Chewbacca standing beside the short creature. Bot
h were facing a row of long, raised planting beds. “Chewie!” Han called out. “I heard you howl!”

  Chewbacca glanced at Han, and then reached out to push gently at Han’s arm, silently urging him to lower his blaster.

  Han reluctantly holstered his weapon. “You gave me a scare, pal. Why did you leave the Falcon?”

  Chewbacca nodded toward the raised planting beds. Han followed his friend’s gaze. Then he gasped.

  Inside the planting beds, greenish-blue plants grew up from the dark soil. Except for their color, the plants looked exactly like the short creature that had led Chewbacca into the greenhouse.

  Han thought of the shipment of soil and seeds that were still on the Falcon. He shook his head. “Mux told me he was getting new laborers,” he said. “He just didn’t bother to mention he was growing them.”

  Looking away from the bizarre plants, Chewbacca grunted at Han.

  “I don’t like the situation either, Chewie. But there’s nothing we can —”

  Chewbacca interrupted with a series of sharp barks.

  “Forget it.” Han turned and stepped out of the greenhouse. Chewbacca barked again as he followed Han out.

  “No, Chewie!” Han answered sternly. “We’re here on a job, remember? We did not come to Shinbone to… to… to rescue a bunch of walking plants.”

  Chewbacca grabbed Han by the upper arm, spun him around, and barked again.

  “You think we should leave with soil and seeds, and take the plant people with us? Oh, that’s just brilliant!” Gesturing to the small crate of gems that he’d left on the ground, Han continued, “It’s bad enough that Jabba’s gonna be angry because we won’t have all the gems he’s expecting, even though that isn’t my fault. But if we don’t do this job exactly like Jabba asked, imagine how much trouble we’ll be in!”