by Frank Redman
Chomp.
No doubt I was going to love this dog.
We entered the pantry, stepping over a large basket full of potatoes.
Jenny led us into the bright kitchen. Light pinewood cabinets covered the walls and Baltic brown granite countertops provided contrast. Brass pots and pans loomed over the center island, but judging by the quantity of canned foods in the pantry, they were probably meant more for decoration than cooking.
The kitchen led to a butler’s pantry and then the formal dining room. These rooms were dark, but crystals on a large chandelier hanging in the dining room twinkled, reflecting light from the kitchen.
As we stepped into a long hallway, voices could be heard at the other end, but not loud enough to pick out words.
Jenny whispered, “That’s where the study is.” She reached into her jacket and pulled out her gun.
I didn’t think that was a good idea, especially if the three bad guys in the study had guns. I doubted Jenny would be able to shoot all three before they shot her, and us. And they would be trigger happy upon seeing her armed.
Or, they may just shoot anyway. And we’d be walking into the room defenseless.
I didn’t tell her to put the gun down.
We snuck down the hallway. French doors opened into the room, but were nearly closed, so that only a thin slice of the room could be seen.
The voices grew louder as we approached, but still too soft to understand.
Tyler sneezed. Sorry.
“Aha! Zey are here!” said a man in a thick German accent.
“Jenny! Run!” There was a loud smack followed by an “Oomph.”
“Daddy!” cried Jenny.
“Wait!” yelled the German. “Don’t make me kill your father! I want to talk to you. A nice little chitchat. Your father said you would have a gun. I suggest you drop ze gun.”
Jenny looked at the pistol in her hand, but didn’t drop it.
“He saved your life, zis loving father of yours, by telling us you had a gun. I can zen warn you. If not, and you walk into ze room, my two comrades would shoot you on sight. Zey are not too smart like that. Zey see someone with ze gun, and zey shoot! Before zey are shot. Hmm, maybe that is a good plan.”
The direction of the German’s voice changed. “Tell her to drop ze gun.”
“Jenny, leave the gun on the floor, honey. There are three men in here armed.”
Jenny looked at me.
I said quietly, “If there are three guys in there with guns, our best chance is to negotiate, see what they want.”
She thought about that for a moment, then ejected a chambered round, catching it in the air, and ejected the magazine. She pressed the round into the magazine, shoved the mag in her jeans pocket and put the gun on the floor. “Okay, the gun is on the floor.”
Jenny obviously knew how to use a gun. Maybe she could actually take them. But they were professional killers. And just because she could snatch ejected rounds out of the air, didn’t mean she could aim. Still, I was impressed. If she knew how to cook those cans of Wolf brand chili, there wouldn’t be a more perfect wife in the world.
The German said, “Please come join us. We are having a nice visit.” Someone snapped fingers and then heavy feet walked across the floor.
Jenny looked at me. I didn’t know what to do either. I’m an IT geek, not a superhero.
I got down on one knee, eye level with Tyler and cupped his muzzle with my hands. I knew he would understand everything I was about to say to him, and I also knew that Jenny would think I’m some sort of freak.
She’d be right.
“I need you to stay here. If you go in there, they will shoot you. I don’t want to take a chance of that happening. We need to talk to these people so we can find out what the hell’s going on. But if you hear us scream, then run in there and bite someone’s ass. Preferably not mine.”
“Or mine,” Jenny agreed.
Tyler locked eyes with me. I understand. I want to kill them. But I have no chance against a gun. Humans hide behind weapons. Cowards. I mean no offense.
I nodded. He was right. Humans hide behind weapons. Yet you could also say that without the higher intelligence of humans we wouldn’t have the weapons to begin with. But that certainly doesn’t make us nobler. In fact, the opposite.
I didn’t admit to him that if I saw a 90 lbs. growling beast jumping for my jugular and I had a gun, I’d shoot. That may make me a coward, but I’d be a breathing coward.
I stood and walked with Jenny into the study.
As soon as we entered the room, a humongous man aimed a silenced pistol at my head and a gigantic man aimed a silenced pistol at Jenny’s. I could not tell if either of these men were the two that chased Tyler and I. They seemed bigger in person, yet I had only seen the killers in the dark and from a distance.
Another man pointed a gun at a figure on the floor, I assumed to be Jenny’s father, Mr. Meredith. The man was much smaller than the goons, splinter-thin with bright white skin, a long thin nose, thin lips, and slits for eyes. He smiled.
Mr. Meredith lay in a fetal position so both of his hands could plug the hole in his right thigh and keep the blood in. It didn’t work as blood seeped between his fingers and pooled on the floor. A lot of blood. I wondered if the femoral artery had been pierced. I didn’t know how long it would take a person to bleed out. Five minutes? Fifteen minutes? He looked bad. His greyish hair matted with sweat, and his skin was pale except the red swelling of his left eye.
Tears shimmered in Jenny’s eyes. She stepped toward her father.
The presumed leader of this group raised his hand and shouted, “Nein!
Jenny stopped.
I stepped forward and yelled, “We need to help him!”
“Nein. He is already dead. He just doesn’t know it yet.”
“Who are you people?”
“I am Francisco.” He pointed to the goons and said, smiling, “This is Jose and this is Pedro.” To Jenny, he said, “You are very pretty. These pictures are inadequate.” He gestured at the various family pictures in the study. “You are much more appealing in ze flesh.” The corner of his mouth curled upward. He snapped his fingers.
One of the goons approached Jenny.
“Don’t worry,” said Splinterman. “He is only going to pat you down for concealed weapons and will not touch you inappropriately. I on ze other hand…”
I thought about impressing them with my bravado and saying something like, ‘If you lay a hand on her…’ but this wasn’t the movies and they weren’t going to hogtie me to keep me still, after which I would have deftly produced a razor blade from my mouth and sawed through my restraints and rescued us all in a barrage of bullets with the gun I wrestled away from Francisco that I didn’t know how to shoot well.
The goon took the clip from Jenny and patted me down, finding nothing of interest.
“Very good,” said Splinterman. “Now we can have our chitchat. I like that word, chitchat. Your father has some very important information, my information in fact, and I want it. He is stubborn.”
Splinterman shot Mr. Meredith in the other leg.
“Aaugh!”
“Daddy!” Jenny fisted her hands and looked as if she was going to charge the lunatic.
Splinterman aimed the silenced pistol at Jenny and fired, missing over her left shoulder.
Jenny clapped a hand to her left ear, evidently hearing the bullet wiz by.
“Maybe you can persuade him otherwise,” said Splinterman, still smiling. “Maybe he will be sensible instead of making me hurt you. I am in a… how do you Americans say it? A win-win situation. I get ze information. If he does not tell me, I have fun with you, and I get ze information. In fact, I hope he does not say anything.” The disgusting man let out a high-pitched cackle.
I wished I had some trained spider monkeys.
Jenny’s father looked at her beseechingly. Staring. “Jenny, I love you, there is no time for me. Just do what he says. He’s right,
I’m already dead. The data he wants is on a flash drive on the fourth bookshelf by the wall. Give it to him.”
She looked in the direction her dad indicated. “No. I can’t.” She made a fast swipe at her face to remove a tear.
“Yes. I will see you again. It is not forever. I will see you in Paradise. Now I can be with your Mom, and I will someday be with you again. Trust me. But I want you to have a full life here first. Get—aangh—get the data. Please.”
I looked at the large bookcases, just now seeing them. Funny how walking into a room at gunpoint and seeing a dying man on the floor keeps you from noticing your surroundings.
The study was large, with a ten-foot ceiling. One wall was all windows, with heavy green drapes. A massive U-shaped cherry wood desk sat next to the windows with a bank of four flat screen computer monitors. Another wall was covered with family pictures, a beautiful woman in some of them—obviously Jenny’s mother. She looked just like her.
Mr. Meredith and Splinterman were by the desk. The goons stood next to us by the door.
Jenny grabbed my hand for support. She led me to the bookcases on the opposite end of the room and said without moving her lips in a whisper loud enough that only I could hear, “Get Tyler.”
I couldn’t think how that would possibly help. I did not want to call Tyler’s name and thus alarm Splinterman, making him think our savior was going to walk into the room. I had no doubt he would shoot whatever entered the room if alerted first. I gambled that seeing a dog walk straight to us would be less threatening and make him not as inclined to be trigger happy.
I had seen Mr. Broxton snap his fingers and then Tyler appear at his side from wherever he had been. I hoped the dog would do the same for me.
I waited until Jenny picked up the flash drive and then I snapped my fingers. Tyler trotted into the room straight to my side standing on a carpet runner. I didn’t know Jenny’s plan, assuming she even had one, but I prayed it would work. I couldn’t see how we were going to get out of this either alive or with Jenny unmolested. I felt like the bottom had disappeared from under our feet, dropping us into an abyss from which we had no hope of ever returning.
Jenny squeezed my hand uncomfortably tight. She looked at her father. “I love you, Daddy.”
Her father managed a weak smile.
She stepped toward Splinterman, then thrust out the flash drive with her free hand and yelled, “Here, you worthless son of a—”
“Thank you my sweet—”
He disappeared—the whole room disappeared!
Chapter Ten
We slid down a polished metal tube. Not fast, but with enough speed to keep us from braking with hands and feet.
Tyler tried to dig his claws into the tube but slipped and went the rest of the way on his haunches.
I turned sideways to make an awkward attempt to see if Splinterman or his goons followed, but the opening had closed. After what seemed to be two seconds but was surely more like three (my timekeeping skills are not as accurate as Jenny’s), we ungracefully slid to a halt as the tube opened into a small room with a tile floor.
I jumped up. “Woo! What was that! Did you see the looks on their faces? Did you see the look on mine?”
Tyler panted with excitement, face grinning. I don’t know if he actually enjoyed the slide or if he just fed off my enthusiasm. I patted him brusquely on the side as his tail wagged.
Jenny didn’t smile. Oh yeah, her father was bleeding to death right in front of us, and we left him there with a maniac who’d already shot him twice.
And there I cheered.
My score on the Idiot Index climbed in dramatic fashion.
“I’m sorry, Jenny. I’m sorry about your dad.”
She walked to a console on the wall and pressed a button. A panel slid down closing off the tube, like a small garage door.
The barrier also closed us off from helping her dad. Forever.
“And I’m sorry about my selfish reaction just now.”
She made brief eye contact and flinched a smile.
The first thought that popped into my head was that I’d blown it. Followed quickly by how silly I am to think there was anything between us to mess up. Followed again by another revelation about how selfish I am.
And it was the second time within a few seconds I’d thought of myself instead of her loss. I know about loss. I’ve lost a lot in my life already, which has given me a greater empathy for others. I don’t know why my thoughts at that time indicated otherwise.
And now Jenny had lost a lot. Her dad… and it seemed like her mom was no longer living either.
Sometimes life sucked.
Jenny grabbed some keys from a workbench next to a small tunnel. “We need to put some distance between us and them. That is, assuming you want to leave. You can stay here with them if you want.” She walked off.
Well, at least she talked to me.
Tyler and I followed. I wanted to ask where we were going, where does the tunnel lead, why was there a tunnel, what were we going to do next, did she know who those people were—oh no! I’d left my backpack in her car. The data from Mr. Broxton’s computer was in my backpack.
A large bang boomed behind us as something heavy crashed into the panel door.
All three of us twirled around. One of the goons must have jumped into the tube to chase us, slamming against the door.
“Crap,” said Jenny. “They’ve already figured out how to open the trapdoor.” She turned back to the tunnel and ran, holding a flashlight in front. “Come on!”
Since both Tyler and I had intellects more advanced than your basic paramecium, especially Tyler, we ran after her. The sound of our shoes slapping the floor echoed like reports from a semiautomatic pistol.
Jenny yelled between breaths to be heard over our footfalls, “We need to call 911.”
I responded in like volume, “We should get clear of your house first. And my backpack is still in your car. I have to get it.”
“Crap.”
Another thing we had in common in addition to both being human was a similar vocabulary.
The tunnel ended at a metal gate. Jenny unlocked it with a key, then locked it after we exited. We were now in a sewer.
We went left and followed this section of tunnel as it curved. I wondered if you could develop a phobia about having a phobia many people have. I wasn’t claustrophobic yet, but I was sick of being in so many tunnels in one night. Craziness.
This one ended at iron bars set horizontally in the concrete wall, making a crude stepladder. A manhole cover capped the top. The thing weighed over a hundred pounds. Here was my chance to impress Jenny with my brute strength, acquired from years of sitting at a keyboard. Yeah.
But I was being too hard on myself. I really was in good shape.
Jenny looked at me with one eyebrow raised.
Tyler looked at me with both eyebrows raised. Want me to get that for you?
I looked at both of them and said, “I guess I should get that, huh?” Then I said in a lowered voice, but enough to be heard, “Impress the lady. Drive with the legs.” I pretended to spit on my palms, then slapped them together and swiftly rubbed.
I looked at Jenny and winked, then almost laughed at my stupid macho act. Grabbing the first of the iron rungs, I climbed as high as I could go without bending over, and took an extra step to force up with my legs.
Then I had a sudden insight: “Where does this lead, a street? Am I about to get tread-head?”
In spite of everything else, she laughed. “It might look good on you.”
Taking that as a no, I lifted the lid, trying my hardest not to grunt. I pushed the lid to the side and climbed up. It was a storm drain.
I looked down at Jenny and said, “All clear.” Then realized I’d have to carry Tyler up the steps. Joy. He was way too big to tuck under an arm and climb. I’d have to be able to grab the next rung with at least one free hand or we’d both be going nowhere. The manhole wasn’t wide enough for me to
put him on my shoulders, even if I could climb while making sure he didn’t slide off.
“You don’t happen to have some rope and a harness, do you?”
Jenny patted her jeans pockets. “Nope.”
“Bummer.” I looked around me, hoping to find a miracle or an angel. I didn’t see any. “What time is it?”
Jenny looked at her watch. “Three o’clock.”
Three AM. Ouch. Angels must be sleeping.
“Okay, Tyler. Climb up.”
He sat.
Sigh.
I climbed down into the tunnel. “We’re going to have to both climb with him. If you can kind of grab under his front legs and keep him from falling backwards, I’ll try to push up on his back legs.”
“Ooookay.” Jenny held the small flashlight in her teeth.
I stood Tyler on his hind legs. Jenny took two steps up, then wrapped one arm around his front shoulder. I lifted Tyler to the first rung.
I said, “Tyler, I need you to keep your back legs stiff,” as if he could understand me. Which he could, but Jenny didn’t know that.
Tyler said, If you drop me, your butt is going to have new holes.
I said to Jenny, “Go up another step and I’ll push.”
She did so. I squatted underneath Tyler and pushed up on his hips.
“Let’s take another step on three. One, two, three. One, two, three…”
No matter how hard I tried to reposition, my face was in the rather unpleasant location of being right next Tyler’s rear end. I petitioned God for a gas-free climb to freedom and fresh air.
We ascended in this manner until Jenny could roll out of the way and Tyler could get his front legs on the ground and climb out.
I looked around, trying to get my bearings. “Where are we?”
“Two streets over.”
“Let’s see if we can get back to your car, if those goons aren’t close. Then we can get out of here and call 911.”
“This way.”
The three of us ran up the street toward Jenny’s car, trying to stay in shadows and close to landscaping that could provide cover. Lucky for us the streets were deserted so we didn’t have to dodge headlights.
This was a very well-to-do neighborhood. I’m sure the residents weren’t accustomed to seeing two people dressed in black and a dog running from one hiding spot to the next along the street. Thankfully no one saw us.