by Shelly Ellis
“Lee, I can take it from here. You go ahead back to your room and I’ll see you in the morning.”
She shook her head before flopping back onto the sofa and cuing up her iPad. “Nope, I’ll stay.”
“Lee, really, I’m fine. You can go.”
“I don’t think so, capitán! If you’re still going strong, so am I. That’s what I get paid to do, right?”
He raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, have it your way. I’ll admit . . . it certainly makes the long nights a lot less lonely having someone burning the midnight oil with you. I’m usually by myself. Nothing like arriving home when everyone from your wife to your housekeeper is snoring.”
“Charisse never waited up for you?” Leila asked quietly.
“She did . . . in the beginning. But I guess it got old waiting for me to come home or . . .” His words drifted off.
“Or what?”
“She got tired of pretending to care,” he answered honestly. He then returned his attention to his laptop.
“I used to wait up for Brad a lot too,” she began with her eyes downcast. She set her iPad aside. “After a few years, I stopped waiting, but not because I got tired of it. I found out he came home so late because of the women he was seeing, not because of work. After a while I just felt stupid, you know? Here I was spending night after night alone, staring at the clock, waiting for my man to come home. Meanwhile, he was spending those hours in someone else’s bed.” She leaned back on the sofa. “Later, I would spend those hours alone thinking about what my life would be like if I had made different decisions. What would have happened if I had divorced Brad years ago or if I had never married him at all?”
Evan nodded, not looking up from his computer keys as he typed. “I know what you mean. I’ve had those contemplative moments too. Solitude tends to do that.”
“Have you ever wondered what life would have been like if we would have ended up together?” she suddenly asked and then immediately regretted it.
Evan’s eyes darted up from his laptop. His fingers paused mid-motion. He stared at her as if she had just announced she was reincarnation of Houdini.
Why did I ask that? This was not an appropriate conversation to have with her boss, let alone a married man, but the question was already out there. She couldn’t take it back.
His look of astonishment gradually faded. It was replaced by irritation.
“I make it a habit not to wallow in things that are in the past or things that were never a possibility,” Evan muttered before returning his attention back to his work.
“Why do you think it was never a possibility?”
“Because you didn’t think of me that way. You made that pretty damn clear, remember? You just saw me as a friend, almost a brother.”
“That’s what you think? That I just saw you as a brother?”
He looked up again and held her gaze. “Are you about to tell me that you saw me as more than that?”
She thought about it, considering his question before she answered. Had there ever been a time when they were younger when she’d felt more for Evan than just friendship or a sisterly love? Leila could recall a few fleeting moments when she’d admire the way his strong arms had looked in a T-shirt or how his butt looked in a pair of jeans. That certainly wasn’t sisterly. She could also remember moments when she would inexplicably lash out at some girl he was dating or wanted to date, when she would roll her eyes whenever he would rave about how beautiful, smart, or funny some other woman was. That wasn’t very sisterly either. She could even remember one night when he had driven her home after a party and she’d wondered, just before she’d climbed out of his car, whether she should just lean over the armrest and kiss him. But of course, she hadn’t. She’d waved good-bye, made some joke, and told him she’d see him in class the next day.
So why had she held back? Why had she never let those fleeting moments and feelings develop into something more?
“It’s not . . . it’s not that I never thought of you in that way, Ev. I just couldn’t let us be more than what we were.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.” She shrugged helplessly. “Maybe it was because I hated how everyone assumed that we would end up together. Everyone in Chesterton acted like it was inevitable that we’d hook up and get married. They didn’t treat us like we were friends, but like we were a couple. It didn’t matter how many times I said there was nothing going on between us. It annoyed the shit out of me to have my life scripted out like that!”
“But what we had was a good thing, Leila. We were close. That was something people admired. There was nothing to be annoyed about.”
“I was a codependent mess and you were lost in puppy love, Ev. Admit it!”
“I wish you would stop calling it that. It only pisses me off when you do.”
“But it’s the truth! It was puppy love because it didn’t have any potential. Be honest. And even if it did, your father would have nipped it in the bud. He hated my guts.”
“He didn’t hate you.”
“He didn’t want me around you!”
She could see from the uncomfortable look on Evan’s face that he agreed with her, even if he didn’t want to admit it.
“Look, you tried your best to hide it . . . to shield me from him, but I know how your father felt about me. He never would have named you as his will executor or made you the head of his company if we had ended up together.”
“You don’t think I knew that?” he shouted, his exasperation now morphing to anger. “But I didn’t care!”
She stared at him, now dumbstruck.
“So what if I wasn’t CEO! So what if he disinherited me! I wanted you, Lee! I loved you . . . like a grown man loves a woman. It wasn’t puppy love. I knew the risk, but I would’ve married you anyway. I would’ve made the sacrifice. That’s how badly I wanted to be with you.” He sighed gruffly. “But that doesn’t matter now, does it?” He returned his attention to his computer screen and the stack of papers in front of him. “It’s all ancient history. Like I said, I prefer not to wallow in the past.”
The hotel suite fell into silence.
He had been willing to sacrifice all that for her? Leila had had no idea.
“Of course, you didn’t,” a voice in her head chided. “Just call you Miss Oblivious.”
Leila felt like a knife was being twisted in her chest.
“I’m sorry, Ev.”
“Huh?” he answered distractedly after typing a few computer keys, now engrossed again in his work.
“I said that I’m sorry.”
He looked up at her.
“If I could go back ten years and do it all over again, I would do things differently.” She shook her head. “I wouldn’t have been so blind and naive.”
He tiredly ran his hand over his face again. “Lee, we can’t—”
“No, Ev, please let me finish! Let me get this off my chest. I should have . . . I should have chosen you,” she whispered, knowing in her heart that she meant those words. “I would have been happier with you than I ever would have been with Brad. You did love me. You always made me feel special. No one else has ever made me feel that way.”
Evan lowered his gaze and didn’t say anything for several seconds. Finally, he looked up at her. “Lee, I’ve learned to let it go. All we have is the here and now, right? It’s better to focus on the present.”
She didn’t reply.
“Come on. Let’s get through this stuff so that we can both get to bed before midnight.” He tossed aside a folder before picking up another. “So much for this business trip being like a vacation, huh? Sun, sand, and relaxation, my ass,” he murmured as he pulled up a spreadsheet on his screen.
She watched him work, but she could tell something had changed. He no longer seemed focused on what was in front of him. He looked unnerved, and frankly, so was she.
He’s married. He’s my boss, she silently reminded herself. But he’s also Evan, the man who’s loved me
and wanted me for . . . for forever. And I . . . I want him too.
Leila let that realization settle into her. She wanted Evan. She couldn’t deny it anymore.
She hesitated only briefly before rising from the love seat and crossing the hotel suite’s living room. She sat on the edge of the ottoman in front of him and he looked up at her again.
“What?” he asked.
She tugged the papers out of his hands and set them on the end table. She removed his laptop and set it beside the papers.
He furrowed his brows in confusion. “What are you doing?”
“What do you think I’m doing?” She cupped his clean-shaven cheeks and closed her eyes. “I’m kissing you, Ev,” she said, before bringing her lips to his. Their lips melded together perfectly, as if sculpted from the same flesh.
Leila had caught Evan off guard with the kiss, but it didn’t take long for him to return it or for it to deepen. This had been building up between them for months, maybe even years. Now that they had started, there was no going back.
He pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her possessively. She could feel the heat of his searing touch through the fabric of her blouse. Their tongues delved inside one another’s mouths and they savored the tastes and smell of both the new and the familiar. Evan tasted like the chocolate he had been nibbling on earlier and smelled just as good.
He tugged her bottom lip between his teeth and she moaned against his lips. His mouth shifted to her neck and then her collarbone, leaving a trail of kisses. When he began to undo each pearl button of her blouse and his mouth descended, she arched her back, inviting his licks, nips, and kisses, enjoying the thrill of his lips and tongue on her skin.
To give him better access, she shifted, swinging one leg to the other side of the armchair so that she was straddling him. Her skirt shimmied higher up her thighs, giving him a tantalizing peek at the black silk panties she wore underneath. He grabbed her bottom and eased her forward on his lap and she felt his erection press urgently against the zipper of his pants and into her groin.
“Lee?”
“Yeah?” she murmured breathlessly as they kissed.
“I’ve wanted this for a looooong damn time,” he said as he tugged off her blouse, leaving her in nothing but her black lace bra and her skirt.
Instantly, she was happy she had decided to forego wearing panty hose that day. One less article of clothing he’d have to remove.
His fingers skimmed the lace edging of her bra, then the tops of her breasts, reverently, and her skin started to tingle and gooseflesh all over again.
“If I could tell you how many times I’d fantasized about doing this, about seeing you topless, you’d think I was the biggest damn pervert in the world,” he said.
He lowered the straps off her shoulders, pushed down the front of one of the cups, then the other. In the cool air of the hotel room, her brown nipples hardened.
“Damn,” he said, licking his lips. “They’re just as beautiful as I imagined.”
He eagerly lowered his mouth to one of the nipples and she breathed in sharply. She closed her eyes. When he tugged the brown nub between his teeth, she moaned again.
One breast wasn’t enough. Evan hurriedly removed the entire bra, tossing it onto the hotel floor. She tugged off his tie and was just as fast at getting off his shirt.
He cupped her bottom again and showed equal attention to each breast, suckling them and licking them until she arched her back again, dug her nails into his shoulders, and bit down hard on her bottom lip to stifle her moans.
She felt the hem of her skirt being pushed up even higher, up to her waist. Then she felt him roughly pull down the waistband of her underwear.
“Let me show you what love from a grown man feels like,” he whispered just as she felt his fingers tease the slick wetness between her thighs. Leila cried out and lowered her head into the crook of his shoulder. She moaned as he massaged her clit, alternating between slow and fast. The hand between her legs and the mouth on her breasts cast a wicked spell on her body, making her slowly lose control.
Evan shifted from massaging her clit to plunging two fingers inside her over and over again. Her hips met those fingers stroke for tormenting stroke, until she was almost bucking on top of him. The tingle that had started along her skin now sank deeper and coasted all over her and she whimpered and moaned yet again. Her vision started to blur. When the orgasm rocked her, she threw back her head and shouted into the quiet hotel room.
He eased her off of his lap and back onto the ottoman soon after. He rose to his feet. She was still dazed and trembling when he returned to the living room less than a minute later with condom packet in hand. She had no idea where he had gotten it and wasn’t about to ask as he pushed her back so that she lay flat against the ottoman cushion. He tugged her panties down her hips, then her legs, and let them fall to the floor. He then knelt between her thighs and spread them wide. She watched as Evan lowered the zipper of his pants and put on the condom, now eager to enjoy what she just had. Her body was more than ready for him, even if her mind was still catching up to all of this. But Evan abruptly paused.
“Lee, you know I still love you, right?” he asked, as he hovered over her. “The years and everything that’s happened haven’t changed a thing. I still—”
He stopped midsentence when she raised a finger to his lips and shook her head.
“Less talking, more loving, Ev,” she said as she wrapped her legs around his waist. “We’ve talked enough.”
She raised her lips and kissed him again. She was sucking on his tongue when he joined their bodies with one thrust that almost sent them both flying off the ottoman. She cried out again. The second thrust was more controlled but just as deep. She felt him ease himself inside her, filling her body and her heart. Leila gazed into the soulful dark eyes she had always admired as they slowly rocked and grinded. They hungrily kissed again, devouring one another. Just their moans and whispers broke the silence of the room. It was like the rest of the world outside of the room had disappeared.
Leila’s heart pounded like a steam engine. The tingle she had felt earlier was now a raging fire that sent her nerve endings into overdrive so that his every touch sent her purring. She wanted this moment to last forever, but she could tell from the pressure that was building up inside her again that it wouldn’t and couldn’t.
The deliciously slow rocking suddenly picked up in tempo. Evan’s hands shifted from her back to her hips and bottom, as he plunged harder. He bit down hard on his bottom lip—so hard that the pink skin now was virtually white. He closed his eyes.
Leila started to tremble again. She gripped his broad shoulders to steady herself, but it was of little use. She was quaking all over, feeling her legs and her arms rapidly turn into putty. When the shockwave finally crested over her, she closed her eyes and shouted his name. Her back arched. The muscles in her legs and arms clinched. She bucked her hips with each spasm.
Evan came soon after. She felt him swell inside her then he cried out. He tightened his hold around her back and her hips. He collapsed against her chest and took gulping breaths. He shuddered and his body convulsed with each tremor. Leila cradled him in her arms until the shudders subsided.
When he peered down at her seconds later, he was smiling. At that moment, Evan looked like the happiest man in the world.
Chapter 20
EVAN
Evan sailed through the doors of Murdoch Conglomerated with a grin on his lips and a hop in his step.
“Good morning,” he almost sang to the security guard at the front desk. He then strode toward the elevators.
“Uh, g-good morning, Mr. Murdoch!” she cried belatedly as he pressed the up button. He was foregoing his private elevator today to be one with the people. An eager smile was on the guard’s bright pink lips. “Y-y-you have a good day, sir!”
He nodded and boarded the elevator, which was already crowded with people from the lower parking garage.
“Good morning,” he said to everyone as the doors closed. Several mumbled their replies, though the elevator fell into an uncomfortable silence as it ascended floors. He was used to it. No one wanted to make small talk when the company CEO was around. Now he remembered yet another reason why he used his private elevator.
When the elevator finally hit the twelfth floor, the others in the compartment all stepped back or shifted aside to let him out first.
He chuckled. “You all have a nice day.”
“You too, sir,” a few murmured.
He said, “Good morning,” a few more times as he made his way to his office, drawing a mix of greetings and panicked expressions as he passed. Finally, he saw her through her opened doorway.
Leila sat at her desk, typing away on her computer. Her delicate brows were drawn together in concentration.
He tried his best to play it cool and to look casual for the sake of office appearances, even as the world around him seemed to go into slow motion. The symphony in his head started to play, building up momentum as it reached its crescendo. As he neared her office, she looked up at him and the face he had seen in his dreams all last night, greeted him in the light of day. His heart and his dick swelled simultaneously. He felt like a giddy teenager.
Look casual! Look casual, damn it, he silently told himself as he stepped into her office.
“Morning, Leila,” he said, glancing down at the BlackBerry he held in his hand.
“Good morning, Evan. Happy Hump Day!”
He almost dropped his phone. He stopped midstride and stared at her in amazement. Had she actually said that at the office? “What?”
She chuckled. “Happy Hump Day . . . Happy Wednesday, Evan. How are you today?”
Shit. That’s what she meant by “Hump Day.” For a second there, he thought she was talking about . . .
“Good. I’m good,” he said, regaining his poise. “Any surprises I should know about on the schedule?” He then pushed open his office door and strolled inside.
She stood up from her desk, quickly grabbed her notepad and pen, and followed him through the doorway. “Well, the meeting you had with Mr. Stuart from Antwerp Inc. that was scheduled for two p.m. was canceled. But he wants to try to reschedule it for next week, if that’s possible. I told his assistant that I’d get back to her later today with a few possible dates and times.” She glanced at the words scribbled on her notepad. “The contract you had the company lawyers review came back yesterday. I forwarded their changes to you. It’s in your email inbox.”