by Susan Simone
‘We spend too much time together.’
‘You’re not going.’
‘Yes I am. I kind of have to.’
‘You’re in charge; you don’t have to do anything.’
‘I can’t send someone undertrained for this. It’d be a death sentence.’
‘Exactly. Damn it Stone! I can’t lose you again!’
‘Paige,’ he ran his hand down his face. ‘I know what I’m doing. Nothing’s killed me yet. I’ll be fine, I promise.’
‘If you don’t come back I swear to God I’m going to kill you.’ He laughed and I threw my arms around his neck in a giant hug he answered, squeezing me so tight I almost couldn’t breathe and lifting me off my feet.
‘Stay off your ankle.’ I watched him gather some men and leave still suiting up. Please God take care of him.
With Stone gone I couldn’t stay calm anymore. I started pacing the floor walking the room over and over again. The injured were settled and no new information came. There was nothing to do but wait. I couldn’t take it. I wasn’t strong enough. The love of my life was running head long into a danger I knew entirely too much about. My ankle hurt but I kept walking. I kept walking even as my limp got progressively worse. Stone’s mother took me by the arm at one point and had me sit down next to her handing me water. I was up again after a few minutes leaving her to stare worriedly after me.
What was taking him so long? I wanted to throw something I had so much pent up frustration. I kept trying to tell myself that I had no idea how long such things were supposed to take so I didn’t know if he was late or early yet, but I kept going back to wishing he would come through that door. What was taking him so long?!
I tripped over my own tired feet and Stone’s father picked me up before I could protest and put me in a chair; propping my ankle up on a nearby cushion. When I tried to get up again he put his hand on my shoulder keeping me still. Actions speak louder than words. It was clear I wasn’t going anywhere.
A bloodied man was thrown through the door clutching a package to his chest. I was out of my seat before Stone’s father could stop me and hurried over to intercept him. These wounds were more than superficial. I recognized the welts and burns that matched my own scars. He was muttering incoherently gripping the package in his bloody white knuckled hands. Terror in his eyes. I remembered that terror. He wouldn’t let me see to his wounds until someone took the package from him. I opened it slowly, and cried. There was a lock of Stone’s hair and a letter.
“We have your son. Give us the girl and we’ll leave quietly. You have one hour. An escort will be arranged at that time, or if the lady is anxious she may wander the halls.”
No. No no no no no. God, please! This can’t be happening! This was it. He was going to die. Even if I went they would kill him, there was no saving him. I fell back on my knees and sobbed holding the lock of hair to my chest. Stone’s father carefully took the letter out of my hand and read it out loud. There was arguing all around me, men pushing and shoving. His father was yelling over the din making big gestures, and his mother was crying. I knew what they were fighting about. They believed this note. They thought that if I went they would have a chance at saving him. I wanted to believe that too. I almost got up and left that minute, but the truth kept me still.
Someone grabbed me and started to propel me to the door and someone else blocked the way. I let them drag me around like a rag doll unable to care what they did. Stone’s father stepped in and pulled me away sitting me in a chair at the table while he admonished his men. I was looking at the maps of the house while I repeated my mantra in my head. No. Not Stone. Anybody but Stone. I couldn’t let this happen but I was only one woman. I would need back up.
Frantically I pulled out a piece of scrap paper and searched for a pen then scribbled out a quick note rushing over to Stone’s father.
“Do we know where they are?” I wrote praying he would understand my rudimentary writing skills. He shrugged and escorted me back to the table. He pulled out a map of the east wing and pointed to a sort of mid room. The room went from wall to wall but there was another room in front and in back that it opened into. “How many are there?” He cocked his head and took the paper and pen from me.
“Nine or ten.” We had at least twelve men in this room that could carry a blade. Most of the injuries would not hinder them.
“Can we get men into this room without being seen?”
“Possibly. Why?”
“We can take them down. We don’t need to release anybody.”
“But these men are injured. It might not be that bad but they won’t fight as strong. Need distraction. Take by surprise.”
“I can give distraction.”
“What?” He narrowed his eyes and hesitated before giving me the pen back.
“I’ll go. I’ll be the distraction.”
“NO!”
“It’s me they want.”
“You go, won’t save him. They kill anyway.”
“I know. They think we trust. They think we stupid. I can get in that room. I can make distraction.”
“Not safe. Richard wants you safe. No. We send someone else.”
“They won’t take someone else. Only me.”
“No. I will not sacrifice you.”
“We stay here, he dies anyway. I go, try this, he might live. Your son live!”
“What if you die?”
“If Richard lives then no matter. Do you know what they have taken from me? My home, my family, my dignity all gone. They will take nothing else! I go.”
“If you die he will not forgive me.”
“But he will live!” His father closed his eyes and muttered his lips barely moving.
“How will you know when we are ready?”
“Give me sign. Something I can see.”
“Rock thrown?”
“No. They see.”
“Flash of light?”
“Yes. Must be when I face this door.”
“What about city guard?”
“If they come, they help. If not, we help us.”
“I will send men one at a time so no one caught easy. You cannot move until we are ready.”
“I can wait. They will hurt me, do things, touch me. Men must let them or all is lost.”
“That is not easy.”
“No. It will be hard for everyone. Very important. Life and death.”
“What will you do?”
“I know how to hurt them. They think I’m weak.”
“Are you sure?” he pleaded with his eyes.
“Yes. We wait little time to make them think we think, then I go.”
“If you change your mind I won’t be mad.”
“I won’t change my mind.” I walked away and saw to the injured man while Stone’s father gave orders to his men. There was more fighting but I ignored it as much as I could. This man was going to die because he tried to save us. He was tortured and dragged through the house to deliver a message and he was going to die for it. I made him as comfortable as I could and held his hand. It was all I could do. I was no healer.
Twenty Six
Time passed much faster this time. It hardly seemed I sat down with the dying man at all before Stone’s father was tapping my shoulder and telling me it was time. The remaining men and maids watched me grimly as I got up. I checked the dagger in my boot to make sure I could reach it easily; I tightened my robe and took a few deep breaths. I left my cane behind believing it would only hinder me and I probably wouldn’t need it much longer anyway.
There were no hugs, no goodbyes, or good lucks. Stone’s mother cried and I believed her torn between her son’s wishes and his life. Stone’s father pleaded with me again to drop this and stay, but I couldn’t. He walked me out, his arm around my shoulders, and watched me disappear down the dark hallway. I knew where I was going, but I thought it best if they didn’t know that, so I wandered aimlessly waiting for the hands that I knew would come.
It wasn’t
long before I was swept off my feet. Two men grabbed me, their hands achingly familiar, each taking an arm and dragging me backward through the deserted house. I should have fought more maybe, put on a better show, but it wasn’t in me. I was calm. I knew what I was doing, I had a purpose.
Suddenly I was pulled to my feet, turned around, and thrust into a room. It was obviously an underused space with bare stony walls and hard cracked floors. Torches were lit all along the wall, but still the space was overtly dark, the light only just illuminating the satisfied faces around me. There was a large vibration on the floor making my ankle ache and I looked around. Stone was being held down by four men and he struggled to get free. He looked at me, terrified and betrayed, yelling at me to run, leave, get away. I couldn’t help the tears that fell down my face. I didn’t want to die, but I wanted him to live more. I smiled at him sadly and shook my head.
‘Now it’s your turn to live.’
“No!” he yelled and his face fell to the ground. He was trying so hard to get free, to save me, but it wasn’t his time for that. I reluctantly turned away unable to look at his face.
I stood in the middle of the room. Other guards were being held down or chained along the walls, and the skeleton man stood in front of me watching me with his dead eyes. He leaned back against the wall casually playing with a long dagger. It looked like one of Stone’s. The light caught the blade and my eyes followed it like a beacon. He smiled and waved it around experimentally watching my head follow it. Laughing he walked up to me murmuring words I couldn’t hear and gently dragged the hilt of the dagger down my face and between my breasts. He circled behind me and I closed my eyes willing myself to stillness as I felt the dagger poke under my butt.
Suddenly he wrenched my head back by my hair and brought the blade to my neck. I held perfectly still while he slowly rubbed the blade up and down my neck. This wasn’t torture to him. I knew all too well it was his version of foreplay. I wondered if he was planning on raping me now, forcing Stone to watch, or if he wanted his fun later when he had me alone. I wouldn’t allow these thoughts to take me over. Stone’s life was on the line. I needed to play the game. I never felt so dirty in my life as he slowly reminded me of everything he did to me. What was taking them so long? Come on! Give me the signal! I prayed so hard I thought I would cry.
He came around front and turned my head so I had to see Stone. They had pulled back his head forcing him to watch. I met his eyes and stared into those tortured depths begging for his forgiveness with every breath. I startled and gasped when the skeleton man ruthlessly pinched my nipple. Stone closed his eyes to shut out the nightmare in front of him. Would he ever forgive me? Would life be worth it if he didn’t?
The skeleton man waited until Stone opened his eyes and gathered my gown around my neck pulling me towards him. His stinking mouth was inches from mine when I caught a flash of light out of the corner of my eye. Thank God! He would not have me this time. I drew back my head like I was afraid and spit in his face. Shocked he stepped back wiping the slime from his eyes. He reached back and hit me hard enough to put me to ground. I lurched to my knees seeing my only chance. If they wanted a distraction, I would give them a distraction they would remember for the rest of their lives.
Carefully I gripped the dagger in my boot and pulled out the newly sharpened blade. The skeleton man stepped forward and lifted his foot to kick me and I caught the back of his ankle with the blade slashing as deeply as I could praying I hit flesh. He lost his balance and fell backwards. I launched myself to my feet and leapt on him screaming like a mad woman. The blade landed before I did, digging deeply into his jugular. I pulled back and stabbed again, hitting his spine. He fought me weakly for only a minute or two and went limp. It wasn’t enough for me. I stabbed him over and over again. This one for Bear. This one for my house. This one for Stone. This one for Sugar. This one for me. One for each of them, for each time they came for me.
There was movement all around me but none of it mattered. I was bathed in warm blood, still stabbing and stabbing taking out all my rage. I ignored the vibrations and the feet nearby, the swords and blades slicing so close they could have taken off my ear and just kept stabbing until I was sobbing and couldn’t lift the blade anymore.
Strong hands covered mine, gently urging me to let go of the blade. I turned my head and Stone was looking at me, tears in his eyes. ‘Let it go, Paige,’ he said. ‘Let it go. He’s dead. Let it go.’ Shaking, I let go leaving the dagger imbedded in his chest. I put a hand on Stone’s face leaving a bloody handprint, he caught it in his.
‘Stone.’
‘I’m here.’
‘I told you I was going to kill you if you didn’t come back.’ He closed his eyes and chuckled. I threw my arms around his neck and he gathered me into him; holding me as tight as he could while I just cried. His chest was rumbling with soft words and I melted into him. Something shifted in the air making me look up and we were surrounded by the men of the house and the city guard just staring down at us, at me with a strange sense of awe.
‘Oh, I’m sorry,’ I said coming back to myself. ‘What happened? Did we get them?’
‘Most of them. It’s over.’
‘Oh good,’ I slumped against him. ‘I think I hurt my ankle again.’ He laughed and buried his face in my hair.
‘You’re a mess. Let’s get you cleaned up.’ He got to his feet with me in his arms and carried me through the house. It seemed suddenly the halls were filled with people, mostly uniformed men. I hid my face in Stone’s chest unwilling to face the masses. His parents met us by the stairs and exchanged a few words. I was vaguely aware of a procession following us.
Stone took me to his room. He stood in the doorway talking to his parents while the maids held a sheet up and cleaned me and changed me into a clean nightgown. I was arranged like a rag doll on the bed with covers and pillows still in shock. Stone sat on the edge of the bed when the maids left. He talked with his hands and voice to those that came, but I was oblivious. All I could see was his face. We were both alive. It was almost too much.
The healer came in after a while and checked me over. For some reason he bore no resemblance to the skeleton man anymore. He was just a gentle old man. Stone snapped in my face getting my attention.
‘Hey. Are you alright?’
‘Oh. Yes. Things are just moving so fast. How did I get up here again?’
“Adrenalin,” the healer said. “She won’t feel a thing for several hours yet. Tomorrow she’ll hurt like hell.”
“What about the ankle?” Stone asked.
“Just irritated it. There’s no new damage, but she should stay off of it for a bit. Nothing serious really, just a bit of shock that will wear off in time. I suggest rest, good food, and willow bark tea. When she’s thinking clearly tell her she did a good job with the injured. Some of them would have died from blood loss if she hadn’t stepped in.”
“Thank you.” The healer left and the room cleared at a glance from Stone. ‘Paige. What were you thinking?’
‘I’m sorry. I—I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I had to do it.’
‘You could have been killed!’
‘So could you.’
‘Why do you keep sacrificing yourself? Don’t you understand that you’re worth more than that? Don’t you understand how cold and dark this world would be without you?’
‘I had a plan.’
‘Dad showed me your notes.’
‘Maybe you will understand better now, but I know what it is like to be their prisoner. I know what they do. I couldn’t leave you there. We had to do something drastic or we were all going to die. You were going to die.’
‘I died when I saw them bring you in. And the way that they touched you.’
‘He was reminding me what he could do.’
‘What?’
‘That wasn’t a show for your benefit. That was foreplay for him.’
‘Oh God.’ He got up and paced the room for several minutes
. ‘He was the one, wasn’t he? He was the worst. You’re wrong it was a show. He wasn’t reminding you he was showing me.’
‘I’m sorry,’ I cried.
‘Oh no. No. Don’t cry. Don’t apologize.’ He climbed on the bed and wrapped his arms around me kissing my neck.
‘Are we too familiar?’ I laughed through my tears.
‘Absolutely.’
‘Isn’t this a bit improper?’
‘The door is open and as far as I’m concerned they can kiss my ass. I’m just so grateful you’re alive. Tonight I need to hold you. You know if you hadn’t killed him I would have.’
‘He’s really dead?’
‘Very dead. A little overkill but well done. How do you feel about that?’
‘I don’t know. I took a life, but he had no soul so what kind of life was it? Please don’t leave me.’
‘Who said anything about leaving? It’s okay to rest. I’m not going anywhere.’
Twenty Seven
It was afternoon when I finally woke up from the first deep and dreamless sleep I’d had since Bear died, or really since before Rinald died. Stone was sitting reading a book and a tray of food was waiting patiently by the bed. Nothing else had happened in the night. The men in black they were able to detain had all been executed and the others had scattered to the wind. We stayed at the house another day and no one would let me get out of bed. Dinner was served in Stone’s room so we could talk without giving me an excuse to get up. For all the arguing and taking sides, when all was said and done most were grateful for my intervention, though I believe Stone had a harder time coming to terms with it. He had forgiven me, but he was haunted by the experience. For himself he had no injuries other than a few nasty bruises.
We left in the morning saddled on Basil’s strong, willing back. If we made good time we would be at the palace in time for dinner. Stone warned me it would probably be a large affair because he had sent a runner on the day before to announce us. I was still exhausted but I had it easy. All I had to do was lean against Stone and I could sleep as much as I wanted.