Finding Our Way Back (A Well Paired Novel)

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Finding Our Way Back (A Well Paired Novel) Page 20

by Rice, Marianne


  She’d painted the sunrise one morning, coming up over the ocean and the tips of the vines. It took careful planning, watching the weather and to see when a good morning would be, and asking Mia to come stay with Jerry for a few hours.

  The end result was spectacular. The sunrise had been okay that morning, but Jenna had seen enough to visualize a grand one with more purples and pinks in the sky.

  The paintings had been sitting in her bedroom ever since with the plan to hang them behind her table of pottery at the holiday craft fair.

  Headlights from a car coming up the driveway shone through the front window of the barn. Grace had texted an hour ago, but Jenna’s hands had been buried deep in clay, so she never responded.

  Figuring it was her, she slowed the wheel and picked up a rag to wipe her hands.

  “Is this a bad time?” Carter stuck his head through the door, scanning the area until he spotted her in a dimly lit corner.

  “No. Come in.”

  The pitcher she’d been working on was actually coming out pretty well, and she didn’t want to be rude, but she didn’t want to lose momentum.

  “Just give me a few minutes to finish this piece and wash up.”

  “Mind if I watch, or do you need your artistic privacy?” he asked with a smirk.

  Rarely did she like an audience when working. Carter hovering over her would make her nervous.

  “The side door is unlocked. Make yourself comfortable, and I’ll be there in a few.”

  He nodded before slipping out.

  The free-flowing creativity was lost, but with only the handle and smoothing of the sides to finish, she hoped it would look halfway decent. It didn’t take long for her to finish and place it in the drying bin to fire in the morning.

  While at the basin washing up, another set of lights shone on the barn. This time she met the visitor in the driveway.

  Tristan.

  Her heart did that fluttery thing it often did around him. It shouldn’t. She’d known him for more than half her life.

  “Hey.” He closed the door to his catering van and nodded to Carter’s truck. “I didn’t know you’d have company this late at night. Sorry.”

  His lip twitched, and he glanced sideways at the house, the reflection of the television casting light onto the dark porch. He propped a container against his hip.

  “It’s almost midnight,” she said unnecessarily. Of course he knew.

  “I’m on my way home from an event and thought I’d stop by to see ... how today went.” He held out the container. “I have leftover spinach ravioli with alfredo sauce.”

  One of her favorites.

  “You could have called.” She took the container and set it on the bottom step.

  “I could have.” He nodded in agreement, once again his gaze flashing to the house. And the twitch. The twitch was back. She could have put him out of his misery and told him Carter had done the same thing.

  Stopped by unannounced, uninvited. Not that they weren’t welcome.

  “I was driving by and saw the lights on in the house and the barn. I figured”—he shrugged—“I’m sorry if I’m disturbing your ... night.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and shuffled his feet.

  “You’re not.” She moved closer so she could see the hazel of his eyes. “And don’t apologize.”

  Keeping his body rigid, his hands tucked in his pockets, he lifted his gaze to meet hers. “How did the meeting with the attorney go?”

  Jenna couldn’t help her wide grin. “Amazing. Jerry wrote me the sweetest letter before he died.”

  “Really?” The hands came out and reached for hers. “That must have been hard to read. Are you okay?”

  “I am.” She welcomed the gentle tug of his hands and stepped closer to him. “It was so sweet. I cried for a solid hour after reading it and have been in the barn ever since.”

  Tristan turned his head and stared into the lit windows of the house, and then to Carter’s truck.

  His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed on his words. “I’m glad you’re not alone.”

  “He just got here ten minutes before you.”

  “Is he ... is staying the night?” Tristan dropped her hands and moved away. “I’m sorry. I have no right to ask you that. I’ll go. I just wanted to make sure you were okay after the meeting. I would have called earlier, but they only sent half the order of shrimp, and two of my waitresses called out—”

  “Hey.” This time she reached for his hands. “Don’t apologize. It’s nice to know you ... people are looking out for me.” And it was. While her parents had always been there for her, it was friends her own age she needed to fill the emptiness she felt after Tristan left.

  After she pushed him away.

  “Besides. It’s a good day. A really good day. Remember how I told you I was going to start searching for apartments?”

  “Yeah. Did you find one?”

  “No need to. Jerry left me the deed to his house. And it’s paid in full.” She smiled so wide she thought she’d crack her face.

  “Seriously? I’m so happy for you. You’ll have a piece of Jerry with you forever.” Tristan pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head.

  With his arms wrapped tightly around her and her face buried into his warm chest, she felt more at home than ever. He knew the exact words to say to her. Owning the home wasn’t about relieving the stress of having to find a place to stay. It was about her connection with Jerry.

  Tristan got it. He got her. So well.

  Too well.

  “Jenna?” Carter called from the porch.

  Tristan dropped his arms too quickly and moved away. “You were very special to him.” He stroked her cheek with his knuckles and turned to the house. “Have a good night,” he said to Carter and walked away into the dark toward his van.

  “Am I interrupting something?” Carter asked when she joined him on the porch.

  “No. He was on his way home from an event and stopped by to check on me. All you guys keep doing that. It’s very sweet.” She picked up the ravioli and brushed past him, holding the door open. “I’m starving. Have you eaten yet?”

  “I ate dinner about six hours ago, but I could always eat again.” He patted his flat stomach.

  “There’s pulled pork, a rotisserie chicken, baked mac and cheese, and spinach ravioli.”

  “I didn’t know you loved to cook so much.” Nope. Never needed to. She had Tristan for that. Had Tristan.

  “I have friends who like to bring me food.”

  Carter narrowed his eyes at her as if trying to read her mind. “I see.” He took the ravioli from her and carried it to the kitchen.

  She got plates from the cabinet and two forks from a nearby drawer while he opened the fridge. “Wine, orange juice, or water seem to be the three choices.”

  “I’m fine with water. I think it’s still warm enough. Tristan said—” Jenna cleared her throat and looked away from Carter as she felt her cheeks turn red. While technically she hadn’t done anything wrong, she still felt the burn of shame in her belly mentioning another man in front of Carter.

  “I can heat it up if you’d like it warmer. Or feel free to choose something else from the fridge.” She set the plates down clumsily and went back to the tiny pantry for a serving spoon.

  They ate their midnight snack in uncomfortable silence. Normally Carter was good for filling airspace. He could ramble on and crack jokes for just about anything. Tonight, however, the air was full of ... something.

  He didn’t seem angry or jealous as they ate. Instead, his facial muscles were relaxed and almost void of any expression at all.

  When their plates were empty, she waited for him to break the silence.

  He didn’t. Maybe he was tired. Tired of her? Possibly. She hadn’t done anything to make him want to be with her.

  “I have plenty of food. Are you sure you don’t want anymore?” She slid the dish closer to him.

  “I’m good. Thank you.” He stood, t
aking the ravioli with him, and covered it before putting it in the fridge.

  “It will only take a minute to wash the plates.” She picked them up and brought them to the sink and took her time scrubbing and rinsing.

  She joined him in the middle of the kitchen, toying with the hem of her loose shirt. Why did she have to be so awkward? She liked Carter and was being unfair to him.

  “I’ve been thinking.” He stepped closer, taking her hands in his. They were clammy as if he was as nervous as her.

  Please don’t ask to take our relationship further. “Thinking is good. Sometimes. Sometimes it’s not good if you’re overthinking and you don’t—” Jenna cut herself off before she rambled like a blubbering idiot.

  “This may be the worst possible time to bring this up,” he started.

  Yes. It was. Jerry had only been gone for a week, she inherited a lovely home, and her heart had decided it was in love with her ex-husband. Shit. Really? Now? Now was when she had to have this epiphany? Nonononononono. This couldn’t be happening. There was no way she loved Tristan.

  Well, she’d always love him. He was her first everything. But she wasn’t in love with him, was she?

  “It’s been a long day,” she agreed.

  “I’ll make it short then.” Carter brought her hands to his lips and kissed her knuckles.

  Nope. No tingles and butterflies.

  “Carter.”

  “I like you.”

  “I like you too.” But not in that way.

  “I have a lot of fun with you.”

  “I have a lot of...” No. This wouldn’t help her situation any. Better to let him talk while she processed a way to let him down gently. She stared straight ahead at his chin as he continued.

  “You’re beautiful, intelligent, but most importantly, you have a huge heart.”

  A sweet, gorgeous man was spouting poetry, and she was thinking of ways to break up with him. What the heck was wrong with her?

  Not her. Him. No, not him. There wasn’t anything wrong with Carter other than ... he wasn’t Tristan.

  “We’ve had a lot of fun together the past few months, but I think our dating has come to an end.”

  “Wait. What?”

  “I know when to respectfully bow out.”

  “You’re...” It wasn’t exactly breaking up since they weren’t in a relationship.

  Carter dropped her hands and toyed with the collar around her neck. “I know when to throw in the towel. I could put up a fight, but you don’t react the same way to me as you do to him.”

  Jenna snatched her head up so their eyes met. “I don’t... I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “I’ve seen it.” His gentle blue eyes were not accusatory. If anything, they were filled with amusement. “I can’t say I’m not jealous. I live for the day a woman looks at me the way you do at him.”

  She shook her head vigorously. There was no way he knew. She’d only just figured out her feelings seconds ago.

  “We have a past history is all.”

  “He’s still in love with you, and I’m not the kind of person to get in the way of a reconciliation.”

  “We’re not ...we haven’t...”

  “It’s okay. I’m not mad.”

  “I haven’t even kissed him. We talk. That’s all.”

  “You’re not kissing is more potent than all of our kisses put together.”

  Damn. He was right, and she felt terrible that he could sense the connection between her and Tristan.

  “I want you to know, even though we were only dating, I never ... I never did anything with Tristan or any other man. I’m loyal.”

  “I know.” He stroked her hair, his friendly eyes dancing with amusement. “I know.”

  “I’m sorry, Carter. I never meant to hurt you. To be honest, I don’t know what’s going on. This wasn’t planned. I don’t know. I just don’t know how I’m feeling or what I’m supposed to feel.”

  “Follow your heart. That’s what I’m doing. You need to promise we’ll stay friends. I can take the high road and accept you’re with Tristan, but I won’t let him cut you out of my life. Your friendship means too much to me.”

  “Never. He wouldn’t do that. I won’t do that.”

  “I trust you. A jealous boyfriend, not so much. You’ll need time. I get that.” He took his keys out of his pocket and leaned down to kiss her cheek. “I’ll see you around.”

  “I’m sorry things didn’t work out between us, Carter,” she said to his retreating back.

  He spun around and walked backward to the door, a wicked smile on his lips. “It only means there’s an even more perfect woman out there for me, right? You set the bar high, Jenna. I won’t settle for any less.” He gave her a two-finger salute and left.

  Dragging her feet to the living room in disbelief, she dropped to the couch and rested her elbows on her knees. Her phone sat on the coffee table and lit up with a text.

  Tristan. A smile wrapped itself around her heart and squeezed.

  If you can’t sleep and need someone to talk to, I’m up as well.

  She picked up her phone and typed a reply but didn’t send it. She needed time to process her new revelation.

  Whether she wanted to be or not, she was in love with her ex-husband.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  It had been over a week since Tristan had seen Jenna or even sent her a text. No matter how badly he wanted to, he respected her too much to interfere with her new relationship.

  All he could do now was offer his friendship. Not that he’d been much of a friend lately. Since he booked his events months in advance, he didn’t have many opportunities to be spontaneous.

  It wasn’t like he could take time off whenever he wanted. And he really, really wanted.

  Wanted Jenna.

  The entire time he unloaded his trays from his van to Coastal Vines’ tasting room, he contemplated asking Alexis about her. It had taken the willpower of Thor to not stop by Jenna’s house, to not keep texting, and now to not harass her friend for updates.

  “Our holiday craft fair brings in quite the crowd, so tonight may be busy.” Alexis set out a line of wine glasses while Tristan prepped his food.

  “I brought two hundred butternut squash ravioli and enough brown butter sauce to feed an army.”

  “In that case, I hope no one shows. I’ll help you with the leftovers.” Ben gave him a cordial slap on the back before kissing his wife. “You sure you don’t need me tonight?”

  “I’ll be fine. Go have fun.”

  “Poker night. Hard to fit in guy time during the busy season,” Ben said to Tristan.

  “You any good?”

  “No. Thankfully, no one else is either. Except Cam. He’s a card shark but goes pretty easy on the rest of us. Maybe sometime—” An elbow from his spry wife shut him up.

  Tristan figured what that was all about. He was still on Alexis’ shit list. Which meant Jenna hadn’t said anything positive about him.

  “Have fun.” Tristan looped a hand towel in the band of his apron and continued to prep.

  As guests arrived, he and Alexis worked in tandem. It was their third wine pairing, and they’d quickly developed a rhythm working together. Too bad she still believed him to be scum.

  When the bell chimed above the door signaling more guests, he glanced up and put on his welcoming smile.

  Jenna. With her hair down and swirled around her shoulders, she looked like she stepped out of a photo shoot. Damn. He always loved her hair.

  She made eye contact with him and smiled shyly. Mia and Lily followed behind, both glancing up at him and then to Jenna.

  A mischievous grin erupted on Mia’s face. It only took that one time to learn their names and their personalities. She was definitely the spunky friend.

  She shoved Jenna from behind, pushing her up to the bar. “Let’s get ourselves some good seats.”

  “Tristan. It’s lovely to see you again. Everyone is still raving about the fo
od at my wedding. I can’t thank you enough for saving our wedding day.”

  Breaking eye contact from Jenna, he shifted his attention to Lily who took a seat to Jenna’s right. “You made a beautiful bride. I’m sure you could have served peanut butter and jelly and everyone would still be raving about your wedding.”

  “Oh, he’s good.” Mia settled into her stool on the other side of Jenna.

  “Wait until you try my ravioli.” He winked at her.

  “Spinach artichoke?”

  “I gave you the rest of those. Butternut squash this time.”

  Mia turned toward Jenna. “You already sampled his ravioli?”

  He couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. “We were married, you know.”

  Shit. Crap. His eyes widened in concern as he read Jenna for a sign he’d screwed up.

  “His ravioli has improved since the last time I sampled it.” This time she wore the mischievous grin.

  This was good. Real good. But he didn’t want to mistake it as a sign of something more if she was just being playful. Leave it to him to read too far into things.

  Placing a ravioli in the middle of each plate, he tossed her a wink. “I’ve been perfecting my recipes over the years. It’s a delicate balance between sweet and savory.” He slid a plate in front of Mia and Lily. And then Jenna.

  “I like it spicy and ... hot.”

  Tristan choked and pounded his chest with his fist. She did not just say that. Mia snorted. He raised an eyebrow and tilted his head to study his ex-wife. Her smirk said it all.

  Yeah. She totally said that.

  Praying the shaking in his knees wouldn’t travel to his hand, he picked up a bottle and squeezed a stream of brown butter sauce over her ravioli. “Let me know how you like it.”

  “Do you two need to get a room?”

  “Mia! Don’t be rude.” Lily picked up her fork and pointed to her plate. “Can I try some of that delicious sauce?”

  “Party pooper. Squirt me up some of that sauce as well, chef boy.”

  “Chef boy?” He liked Jenna’s friends. He liked how they had her back and were able to tease as well.

  “Hey! No eating until I tell you about the pairing.” Alexis filled Jenna’s glass then started on Mia’s. “Who’s driving?”

 

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