I made excuses in my mind, a bit of uncomfortable role-playing. I could’ve easily taken advantage of her, but it wouldn’t have been right for either of us.
Sure, completely poised and beautiful, I could’ve easily been attracted to more than her body. She had a powerful presence about her. She wasn’t the typical woman who couldn’t make a decision. Kaci knew what she wanted and made decisions quickly. She had such an amazing strength and character about her, completely unabashed, opposite to a bitchy or whiney female trying to paw her way to the top.
“You’re beautiful, charming, and incredibly sexy. Nothing is wrong with you. But right now, I can only be a friend, a mentor, a business partner. Sex would complicate things, and I’m not looking for a relationship.”
“I didn’t ask you to screw me. I asked you to share my bed. You’re too tall and the couch will kill your back. Besides, I don’t want to be alone.”
“Okay, then.”
When I came out of the bathroom, I found she had changed into a t-shirt and shorts. I was grateful it wasn’t a piece of irresistible lingerie.
Just the smell of her, the touch of her skin on my arm, I found way too tempting. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d slept with clothes on, but I happened to be grateful for the layers of fabric between us, which kept me from jumping the ledge into a passionate abyss and taking her with me.
***
The smell of coffee woke me from a dream. Fully awake, I realized somehow I had made it to the couch to sleep with no recollection of how I got there.
“Did I kick you out of the bed?” She laughed. Her face flushed with a brightness, which had been missing from before. With her hair in a ponytail, she wore running clothes and ear buds were hanging around her neck; obviously, she’d been out for a run.
She handed me a cup of coffee and took a seat across from me, bouncing into the dark, rich leather chair.
Not to give my lack of memory away, I laughed. “You don’t remember telling me to move?”
“No, did I do that? Actually, I remember falling asleep quickly and sleeping sound until sunrise, Then I went for a run.”
“I guess I moved to the couch when you fell asleep. I don’t remember. So, you’re ready for your interview with Zeik?”
She nodded, but her eyes widened, conveying a bit of anxiety. “I don’t know which of my drawings to take and my portfolio will only hold so many.” She stood and walked to her drafting table in the corner. The location perfectly suited a quiet time of sketching flanked by two open windows, with heavily carved walnut trim. She had pulled the red silk window covering to the corner, allowing the morning sun to come through.
I instantly realized she would appreciate the east facing view of the penthouse and began to picture her in front of the patio working creatively.
“I want to show you something. Then I’ll take you to brunch at my favorite spot before you go meet with Zeik.”
“You’re going to brunch wearing those clothes?” She covered her mouth with the back of her hand, trying hard to stifle her laughter at my running shorts, t-shirt, and socks, which didn’t match.
“Yes, I am, but I’ve always got a plan. Go get ready.”
Kaci packed up her drawings and showered. When she reappeared in a grey pencil skirt suit with a pink silk tank top, I knew she had mentally prepared for the interview and was ready to take on the business world. She looked focused and confident.
“Ready?”
“I am, but I still can’t get over you going looking like that. I mean, I look together, but you look like yesterday, refried.” She giggled.
“Okay, fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. I do have a plan.”
We took my car to the penthouse at the Millennium, a short drive away from the bar, so I’d be close enough to her in case she would ever need anything. I left the car with Vinnie, the head of security and explained to him the changes taking effect. He looked around me and took a long gaze at Kaci standing outside the glass door in the hallway.
“She really must be a special lady for you to go to all this trouble. I remember when you helped Alex. How’s she doing by the way?”
“She’s fantastic. She and Grayson are getting ready for twins soon. They got back from a trip to Italy a few weeks ago and won’t be traveling anymore until after their little girls are born. I’m going back to Dallas in a couple of weeks. I’ll be sure to tell her you asked about her. Please look after Kaci. She’s innocent to the world, and other than me, she’s got no one since her Grandpa passed.”
“Say no more. I’ll be here.”
I escorted Kaci up to the penthouse. When I opened the door, she saw the chef putting the final touches on our brunch and turned to me and smiled. After which, she took inventory of the penthouse. The beautiful view from the open glass doors held her attention. She walked outside in a trance. I left her alone and took the opportunity to shower and change.
Comfortable in worn jeans, t-shirt, and flip flops, I reemerged to find her standing on the balcony enjoying the nice breeze.
“Could you make this place a home?”
“Is this yours?”
“This is yours, Kaci, for as long as you want it. I put it in the contract. Didn’t you read it?”
“Yes, but my mind’s foggy. Maybe I should read it again to see what other twisted stuff you threw in there.”
“Hey, nothing twisted. This isn’t twisted; it’s what I like to call doing the right thing. I want to stay over the bar. I need a change in my own life. We’re helping each other.”
“But I don’t know what to say; thank you doesn’t cut it right now,” she said, while fighting back the tears.
“It does when you mean it.” I reached out and held her in my arms. “How old are you, Kaci?”
“Twenty-five. Why?”
“I have a sister, Zoe, who is a little bit older than you. You look a lot like her. I would hope someone would’ve helped my sister if the opportunity had presented. Someday, you’ll have the chance to help someone, and I’m sure you’ll do it without even thinking because you’ll remember this day. Now, let’s eat before the chef gets insulted.”
***
Apartments and penthouses were dwellings. Period. A place that echoed within the night. The loft above the bar held a different kind of distraction.
With Kaci at the interview, I took the liberty of moving my personal things to the loft. I’d owned a series of apartments and lofts in this building and the surrounding area over the years, while I’d made my way up the business ladder. I’d bought my first penthouse here five years ago, but sold it when I moved to Dallas to be closer to my brother and sister and their families.
Okay, I’d admit it. I wanted to be closer to Monica. I wanted to experience what it could be like not to have a long distance love affair. Ready to settle down, I could’ve given her everything, satisfied her in every way, and she broke my heart and shattered my trust all in one swift move.
I’d never forget the shocked look on her face when she saw me in the restaurant, while she was secretly out with her ex, all nice and cozy. She tried to pass it off as a business lunch. I didn’t buy it.
***
I heard the key in the penthouse door and watched it fling open. The beaming of Kaci’s face could’ve melted concrete.
“I did it! I got the job, and he wants me to start next week! Thank you!” She dropped her portfolio on the sofa and ran to me. Her arms wrapped around my waist. When she let go, she took a long look around and noticed the change in the decor. All of my personal items had been boxed up and removed.
I’d also phoned a designer for the suggestion of a top-of-the-line drafting desk, had it ordered, and delivery scheduled for later that evening. With my things on their way to the bar, I only had one more item to tackle, convincing Kaci to pack up and put Charlie’s things in storage. I was very curious to find out if she would allow me to do it.
“Harrison, what did you do?” She walked around and touched the
empty bookcase.
“I moved my personal things to the spare room at the bar. This place is ready for you to move in. The movers are lined up to start whenever you are. Even tonight, if you want. Jim said call him.” I handed her his business card.
She walked around the penthouse for several minutes, taking inventory of the space. I noticed the sadness quickly return to her face. “Let’s go get it over with.”
***
The movers boxed her personal items from the loft. She agreed to have Charlie’s things put in storage until she found the strength to go through them. When she directed the movers to the drafting table, I secretly went behind her and told them to leave it.
A new job deserved a celebratory dinner. During the meal, we threw ideas back and forth about the changes I wanted to make at Logan’s, and she gave me her two cents worth. She thought having a jazz singer at least once a week was a great idea. She also liked my idea of building a small stage for open mic night.
She had become comfortable in speaking of Logan’s in the past tense, as if it had been years since she had been there. That made me happy; I knew she could let go and move on.
The new drafting table caught her eye the moment we entered the penthouse. “You did this for me? Why do you keep doing so much for me? I can’t ever repay you.”
“You don’t have to, simply pay it forward. Remember that. I saved your other table because I want to start the Charlie Logan Architectural Scholarship. You’ll pick the deserving recipient, and one day, when you’re ready, you might want to give a young kid a start with your old table. It’s in storage with Charlie’s things. Here’s the key.”
“I’d like that. Thank you.” She took a seat on the sofa and looked around at her new home with an admiring smile.
“Here are the spare keys to the car. Vinnie has the other set. When you get all settled in, call me. I’ll be in Bartending School for the next two days. I’ve got Randy’s crew lined up to get Logan’s ready for Charlie’s service on Thursday, like you planned. If you need anything…”
“I know, I’ll call. I’m so grateful for everything, Harrison.” She sat on the sofa and didn’t offer to move.
I quietly let myself out.
CHAPTER FIVE
The days flew by like a furious wind, while I got Logan’s ready for Charlie’s service. The classic black baby grand piano fit perfectly in the back corner of the bar. Kristin, the interior designer, completed my vision with new long red velvet drapes flanking the windows and corner booths.
With the new jazz singer and piano player hired along with four more bartenders and a full line of house wines, Logan’s had been revamped into a sexy jazz club.
“Who are you?” I heard Kaci ask in a fiery tone of voice.
I couldn’t make it out of the back room before Luke had a chance to return her bite.
“I’m Luke Anderson. What’s it to you, and we aren’t open yet,” Luke retorted with a pissy attitude.
“I’m Kaci Logan, and this is my bar.”
“I’m so sorry. I’d didn’t mean to be an ass.” He extended his hand. Thank goodness, she met him halfway and shook hands.
“Hey, I see you two have met. Kaci, the bar school recommended Luke. He’s been an instructor there before. He helped me hire a full team including a sommelier, which means our idea of a jazz bar is coming together. In fact, I’d like both of you to meet Nola.” I paused while she made her entrance into the bar. “Nola, I’d like for you to meet Kaci Logan and Luke Anderson. Kaci is the namesake of the establishment, and Luke is the new general manager.”
“Pleased to meet you both. Kaci, may I offer my condolences.” Nola paused and embraced her. “Is there somewhere you and I could visit for a little bit before this afternoon’s service?”
“Sure, why don’t we go upstairs?”
The ladies left Luke and me to get everything ready downstairs.
“Dude, you didn’t tell me she’s smokin’ hot. Are you two…?”
“No, we’re friends. She has no family and had put her life on hold to help Charlie with the bar. She has run this place for almost a year. I’m making sure she gets her life going.”
“So, no boyfriend?”
“Luke! Focus on work, will you?”
“K. Fine, but I’m still going to keep my eyes open, and she’s on my radar.”
I gave him my best gritty eye, but he seemed like a nice guy with a clean background. He had a business degree and had managed to do quite well in restaurant and bar management. I didn’t intend to police Kaci’s friends and relationships, but a little hovering couldn’t hurt.
The memorial service rendered a packed house, and Nola managed to create quite a buzz with the songs she chose to sing for the service. She and Kaci hit it off well. I kept to the agreement and dimmed the lights promptly at nine o’clock and had a round of toasts to Charlie. Many of his life-long friends came out to pay their respects. It was a bit shocking to see Kaci put his leather journal out for friends to read or sign, a way of gaining closure, I supposed. We said our good-byes, and somehow, the moment made everything seem so final.
***
A few weeks later…
“I cannot believe you bought a bar,” Grayson exclaimed. “Do you even know how to pour a beer?” He laughed almost uncontrollably in my ear over the phone.
I heard him whisper to his wife, Alexandra, “My stupid brother bought a bar.”
“Hey, I heard that man. You aren’t muted,” I responded, but I laughed with him.
I explained the renderings of the last couple of weeks. Then we moved on to the latest happenings in Dallas. Their babies were due in a few more weeks.
I had hoped Monica and I would’ve added to the baby factory right away, but hell, we didn’t even make it long enough to get to the altar.
“When are you coming back to town? I’d like us all to get together again before it gets baby crazy.”
“Not for a couple of weeks.”
“Hey, Alex wants to tell you something. Hold on.”
There was a pause as I waited for Grayson to hand the phone to Alexandra.
“Hey, stranger,” she greeted me.
“Hey back at ya, preggo.”
“You’re funny. Cooper calls me wide-n-stuffed, which is worse.”
“I’ve not heard that one. It fits.”
“Shut up. I wanted to let you know that Monica’s in Chicago. You need to call her. I know what you think happened, and you’re wrong, Harrison.”
“Hey, sis, I love ya, but stay out of it, okay. I’m not calling her.”
“See you in a couple of weeks. As soon as these babies are able to travel, we’ll come up and see the bar.” She giggled.
I knew she meant well. “Deal.”
I missed them. Chicago had always been my home, my roots, but since Grayson and I had fixed our relationship issues, I missed not being near him.
With a tall, cold beer, I took a seat in my favorite corner booth and cleared out a ton of emails on my laptop.
Luke closed up the bar and left.
An eerie feeling came over me. I’d never felt more alone. Kaci’s role had progressed at the firm, and she didn’t need me to hold her hand any longer. I had friends who came in to see me and wanted to check out the changes in Logan’s, but for the most part, my life had drastically changed and left me fading into the woodwork. I no longer had an existence.
I remembered back to the night I met Olivia Balcone at a Bears game. She won my heart right off the bat. We placed a bet on the game, and she lost big. I didn’t let her off the hook, and I didn’t think she wanted me to. We came to Logan’s after the game with all of my friends. She had a few to many and danced on the bar that night. I took her home with me, and she didn’t leave until we broke up almost two years later.
At first, our relationship amazed me. Great chemistry, similar likes and very hot sex. She could even hold her own in the business world. She had a great job as a pharmaceutical rep, and her Italian fam
ily had great roots.
We never argued over the simple things that destroyed most relationships. In fact, everything seemed to be fine, until I had to start traveling quite a bit for a merger I had in negotiations. A work commitment prevented her from going with me. I tried every way in the world to get her to quit her job, but she refused. The reason why wouldn’t evolve until weeks later, and it had nothing to do with her job.
I returned home a couple of days early from the business trip to California. I wanted to surprise Olivia and take her to the Cayman Islands for a long weekend. The atmosphere would’ve provided a beautiful backdrop for a proposal. I was certain she was it for me.
Only, I soon discovered there would never be “the one” for her. When I opened the door to the penthouse, I heard her laughing while on the phone. She didn’t share with whom and I didn’t ask.
We had crazy sex that night. She wanted to be tied up, and she’d bought all kinds of sex toys. At first, I thought she had gotten some great girlfriend advice or something.
“What’s with the bondage business? You watch some crazy pornos without me?” I remembered asking her.
Her response took me by surprise. “Not exactly. My friend Bella took me to this special club. I want us to go,” she said with a coy smile.
“You want us to go to a sex club?”
“Yes, I think you’d love it.”
“I’m not into that!” I said.
“Fine, I’ll go without you. There are plenty of Doms there who can collar me.”
She threw on her clothes and disappeared for the rest of the night. My inability to accept the change in her signaled the beginning of the demise in our relationship. I cancelled the trip and tossed out any thoughts of a proposal.
Later that weekend, Grayson came in on leave from the Army. He and Olivia hit if off more than she and I ever did. They started sneaking around and screwing around and didn’t think I knew, but their chemistry had sparks, noticeably thick. The harder they tried to stay away from each other in front of me, the more I wanted to publicly call them out.
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