“Only de Lawd knows fo’ sho’. But ain’t no way she gonna hab dat chance iffen you and me git hitched.”
She lowered her gaze to their entwined fingers. “I know you’re right.” But that didn’t lessen the hurt.
At least she could still have morning coffee and prayer time with Shaw. They’d shared their lives as close friends over the years since she returned to Penbrook for good. Closer than most husbands and wives, she imagined, but not able to go for walks together, hand in hand, arm in arm. They would share their lives in this manner, she imagined, until one of them died.
1905
I don’t know what Annie is thinking to allow my granddaughter to marry at fifteen. But it’s done now. Her husband, Elijah, is a drunkard and a sloth. But I have given them a cabin on some of the most prime Penbrook land, lest my darling Henry’s daughter be left in the cold. Henry would never approve. If only he were here to look after his little girl.
1910
How can a human feel such pain and still remain alive? My darling Shaw has succumbed to a lung infection. He is in the hands of Jesus now. I rejoice for him, but I weep for my own loneliness. How long must I live without him? I am not a young woman anymore. I’ve had my share of the good and the bad life can afford. Shaw was the largest part of the good. I shall count the days until we are reunited in heaven.
1912
Rae’s third baby is born. It is only too obvious the boy is not Elijah’s. I’ve had to bribe the fool to keep his mouth shut and raise little Andy as his own. He will not harm Rae or her new son if he wants any more money from me.
1917
Daniel tried to join the army, but he is terribly nearsighted and they didn’t want him. Praise be to God.
Andy stopped reading. His eyes scanned over what he’d read. Rae. Elijah. Andy. Miss Penbrook’s diaries had suddenly begun detailing his own life.
1918
Andy is the light of my life. He comes to my door often. I’m teaching him to read. He’s the brightest child I’ve ever seen. His skin is light, but not light enough to pass. If it were, I’d send him north to a school where he would have a better chance in life. But then perhaps, God’s will is that the lies end. If only the people God created could see past color into the soul the way He does.
Andy’s heart pounded inside his chest.
1922
I have no choice. I must send Andy away or Elijah will kill him in a fit of rage. Daniel and Lois have readily agreed to take him in. My granddaughter wept bitterly and clung to the boy when I told her what must be done. But she knows it is the only way to save him. His life will be spared. And he will have a future that is worth more than tending fields.
Who knows if perhaps my little Andy is the very reason God delivered Daniel from the mouth of the lion?
Overwhelmed, Andy leaned back in his chair and let the fact sink in that Miss Penbrook was his great-grandmother. Henry Jr., his grandfather. All of his sketchy memories of childhood seemed clearer now. He remembered Miss Penbrook giving him cookies and lemonade, listening to his stories, and applauding his genius. The memories came back with more clarity now that he knew who the old woman in his mind happened to be.
He had question upon question to ask her. But more than anything, he wanted to gather the frail old woman, his great-grandmother, in his arms and squeeze out all the hurt she’d endured in her lifetime.
He shot to his feet and raced down the hall to her room. Stopping before her door, he composed himself. His light tap elicited no response, so he opened the door and slipped inside.
The old lady lay facing the window. Bathed in light, her face shone.
Andy caught his breath at the expression of rapture on her face. “Miss Penbrook?”
She remained still. Andy stepped closer. Tear sprang to his eyes. She stared, but didn’t see. Now he understood the smile on her lips. Miss Penbrook had seen the face of Jesus.
He took her cold hand and pressed it to his lips. “Thank you, Catherina. Thank you for everything.”
Laying her hand back on her chest, he called for Delta.
Andy left the room, his mind still spinning from the discovery that he had a full heritage. Black and white, rich and poor. Young and old.
Three days later
The burial took place in the little cemetery at the edge of the woods behind Penbrook House. In a letter of instruction, Miss Penbrook had hand picked each of the mourners she wanted to attend her funeral. She was laid to rest next to Shaw in the old slave cemetery.
At the old woman’s request, Andy gave the eulogy. Now he understood the reason for the diaries. He stood at the graveside and took in the sight of his large family.
“On a hot Georgia day in 1852, a woman name Naomi stood on the auction block. They were selling her, apart from her baby. In a moment of desperation, she snatched her four-year-old daughter and tried to run away. A woman named Madeline Penbrook saw the tragedy playing out before her and dared to change the lives of a slave woman and a little girl named Catherina.”
Epilogue
Andy smiled down at his daughter as she squirmed against his chest and made cooing baby noises. He knew she wouldn’t be satisfied with him for long. But for now, he relished the warmth of her little body, the soft scent of her recent bath.
“Let’s let Mama sleep for a few more minutes, little one.”
At the sound of his voice, the baby stopped squirming and stared back at him with curious assessment. Wild love swelled his chest every time he looked at his baby girl.
“Cat’s awake?” Lexie’s sleepy tone spoke from the bed
Andy smiled and nodded. “Only for a few minutes.”
“Why didn’t you wake me?”
The baby let out a hungry wail. Andy chuckled. “We were just about to.”
He walked to the bed and laid his beautiful daughter in his wife’s arms. “Catherina Carmichael, you are loved.” He sat on the edge of the bed and marveled at the sight of the two females in his life.
He stroked the baby’s satiny head as she latched on to her mother’s breast. The decision to name the baby after Cat had been an easy one. He and Lexie had agreed that in many ways the elderly woman had saved their marriage. To be sure, Andy’s trip south had been life-changing. In the aftermath, he’d reconnected with his wife. Had reconnected with the Rileys. And most important, had reconnected with God.
Though Andy had returned to Chicago after his great-grandmother’s funeral, his thoughts often turned to Georgia. Along with several thousand dollars, Cat had willed him the Penbrook diaries, minus those she’d set aside for Jonas. The inheritance had been more than he ever dreamed he might receive.
Andy hadn’t been surprised that Cat had willed Penbrook to Daniel Riley. Indeed, Andy would have been afraid to accept if she’d willed it to him. Especially after his run-ins with the Klan; specifically, his half-brother, Sam.
A year after Rafe and Ruthie’s deaths, no one had been arrested for their murder. Andy had strongly suggested that his southern family pursue justice. But in spite of their bitterness, no one was brave enough to follow through. Perhaps they would, some day. But for now, fear kept them quiet and a murderer stayed free.
A soft snore captured his attention. Lexie had fallen asleep with Cat at her breast. His lips pulled into a smile at his wide-eyed daughter. Now with a fully belly, Cat obviously wasn’t ready to go back to sleep. She stared up at him with beautiful brown eyes. Her lips puckered and she cooed as though longing to share all the love in her heart. Enchanted, he lifted her in his arms and walked across the room to the rocking chair.
In this baby he saw all that was good about the world. The innocence of a child who had never known bigotry, who would never have to hide who she was.
He prayed that her soul would stay as pure and unfettered as it was this day. Only God knew the future for Cat, but Andy intended to do all he could to see that she lived, loved, hoped, dreamed, had all the opportunities to be all she was created to be. Unlike her pred
ecessor, his Catherina had been born free. And with God’s grace, Andy would see to it that she remained free.
THE END
Table of Contents
Copyright
Part One: Shame
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Part Two: Bitterness
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Part Three: Darkness
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Part Four: Light
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Epilogue
The Color Of The Soul (The Penbrook Diaries) Page 26