For a while, it had been interesting not being the daughter of an earl, just being a girl. The pirate who'd stolen her had seen her that way. Just a girl—one he'd seduced.
She was just learning how to live, how to be herself, how to conduct herself in the world without such strict rules and limitations. There was another world with the absence of rules. Here, in the Caribbean, there was a world without rules at all. All the people here—perhaps not as much here in Port Royal as in the pirate ports—were true to their own selves, intentions and their ambitions—including the women.
Sarah couldn't get Clara out of her mind, this girl that had taken her place in this world, persevered and won. All those people in Tortuga Bay looked up to her for guidance and direction. She was the leader of the whole town—even Madame Guerier, who ran her business with prosperity. It was not perhaps a business Sarah wanted to be involved with in any respect, but she respected the women who thrived. All those women in Isla Rosa who ran businesses, had open shops, and survived. That was impressive, much more so than being married off for someone else's benefits, treated like livestock.
Before coming here, she'd never known that there was anything else. There was no leeway for another life back in England. If she was deemed disgraced, she would be hidden away from everybody, and she would spend the rest of her life that way, an embarrassment to the family, kept somewhere where she wouldn't cause any problems.
She wasn't ready to go back, unable to bring herself to embrace the purpose she had back in England. She wanted romance; she wanted excitement. As frightened as she’d been when their ship had been boarded and she had been presented to the captain, there had also been something inordinately exciting about it. A handsome pirate's conquest. He had been rather handsome with his dark eyes and intense gaze.
Obviously, he’d had no plans on keeping her, but it had given her an indication of what things could potentially be. It was with him she had negotiated her release in Isla Rosa. He hadn’t actually wished her any harm, and had agreed to her wishes. He might actually be the first person to ever have been concerned about her wishes.
This new pirate, the one that everyone in Tortuga Bay had called Lieutenant Havencourt, was preparing to sail in the morning. He was taking her back to her family and to the life that now sat so badly with her.
Chewing on the edge of her thumbnail, she wondered what to do. Nerves bubbled in her stomach, nerves that screamed a warning in her mind. She didn't want this. She didn't want to go back. But he didn't see this place the way she saw it, the good she saw in the Caribbean. He saw nothing but the harshness, the embarrassment of being judged by all. But he wanted to go back to a future he embraced, and the bosom of his family. To be restored to all the things he'd lost, as she would be, but unlike him, she would lose something she hadn't had before—freedom.
What she had to face was if she was able to go back, be the person she had been. This had been bothering her from the moment he'd appeared on that beach in Isla Rose, threatening to steal her away.
This felt like a turning point, the decision that she would have to live with for the rest of her life. If she went back, it couldn’t be undone; she would have to accept her fate and all the limitations that it placed on her. But she did have another choice, one she didn't quite understand. A life without love, when there was that shining potential of love, to be happy the way Clara was. That felt true; it felt real, as opposed to the contract negotiation that her father had conducted for her, including land transfers, wealth distribution, and of the long-standing mutual benefits.
If she went back, she would never know love, but instead, be a vessel for her father's ambition. What she'd seen here had changed her, opened her eyes to a different fate. She was not ready to give up. Could she live with herself if she didn't try?
It wouldn't be impossible to find her way back to Tortuga Bay. There were fishermen who could take her there, or to another port where the pirates occasionally visited. She could make her way there, could probably negotiate a way back. She knew Clara Rossi and could ask to speak to her.
Walking to the wardrobe, she pulled out the plain dress she'd arrived in. No one would think twice about her in this dress—just another girl. Pulling it on, she breathed a sigh of relief, feeling like she was being true to herself in this plain dress, with simple lines and basic tailoring. Beautiful things were unimportant and they always came with a price—a very steep one.
Sneaking down the back stairs, Sarah made her way to the back door. The kitchen staff had been sitting around a table as she dashed across the doorway without anyone noticing her, quietly opening the door and stepping outside. Excitement flared in her blood as she ran out onto the street, forcing herself to walk so as to not attract attention to herself.
She would ask in the taverns, which could be a dangerous strategy, but she knew what to watch for now. She knew when men were lying and she knew when they had dishonest intentions. She trusted her judgment these days; it had served her well during her time in the Caribbean.
Chapter 10
A brusque knock on the door disturbed Joshua's peace. "The admiral wants to see you," a youth said. Joshua could hear the boy's steps retreating down the corridor. Then he heard running and he felt the cloying fear that something was happening. Fortunes could change at a moment's notice in the Caribbean, especially if the Spanish were attacking.
Adrenaline coursed through him at the thought. If the Spanish were here, it would be all-out battle. For a second, he imagined himself on a ship, one of many, engaging in battle with splinters flying, smoke stinging his eyes, and the jarring cacophony of noise that resulted from battle. Surely, they would want his experience then as all capable men would be needed. But the girl bounded through his head. His mission was to keep her safe, and that commitment probably outweighed the need of assisting with the protection of the town. He would have to save the girl. What would he do if that were the case? He would have to collect her and find a way to safety.
Grabbing his coat, he strode to the door. But then, the admiral would not be here if the Spanish were raiding. As he looked around, he saw urgency, but not the panic he would expect. No, the Spanish were not here—something else was going on.
The door to the admiral's office was open and men were inside, awaiting instructions. Something had definitely occurred. "Havencourt," the admiral said as he spotted him. "The damnedest thing. This girl is missing."
Joshua felt unease crawl up his spine. "What do you mean, missing?"
"We cannot locate her. My men have searched the town and there's no sign of her."
"The Spanish must have come for her," Joshua said with astonishment, because he wouldn’t believe it if it wasn’t for the fact she was gone.
The admiral huffed. "I hardly think a Spanish galleon could sail into port without us noticing."
Joshua raised his eyebrows and cleared his throat. "I'm not sure that is an assumption that can entirely be depended upon." More than once had the inhabitants of Tortuga Bay had cause to sneak into Port Royal.
"Is that so?" the admiral said, raising his chin in displeasure. "You are aware that this has been done?"
"Into this very fort."
The admiral threw him a dismayed glance. "It will greatly displease me if you are telling me we've had pirates sneaking around inside our fort."
"Then I shall refrain from telling you."
He considered Joshua for a moment, the muscles in his jaw working. "No, we've learned she was asking around in the taverns for a way off the island. It appears she has run away."
Now it was Joshua's turn to be dumbfounded. He swore. How could she be so stupid? What could possibly have possessed her?
"Do you have any insight into the actions she's taken?" the admiral asked.
"No," he admitted.
"Perhaps she's formed an attachment to someone inappropriate."
"I didn't observe any attachments along those lines as I watched her,” Joshua replied. “I cannot accou
nt for this irrationality."
"Perhaps her experiences have been harsh enough that she has become disturbed. Or assumes that her welcome back into the bosom of her family is unlikely. I can assure you that is not the case."
"If you could avail me a ship, I can retrieve her."
The admiral nodded. "I think that would be for the best. The vice-admiral would not condone any other action, at this point."
A ship and crew were prepared for him, and again, he took the helm of a ship—this time a naval ship, although not currently on official duty. The crew were mariners, but again, not on official naval business. They took orders well and the ship sailed smoothly away from Port Royal.
Now the question was if she had headed back to Isla Rosa or to Tortuga Bay, but on a fishing vessel, they would be slow enough that he could catch them either way. No, he had not observed her having a sweetheart in Isla Rosa, or any other attachments she'd be running back to. Her actions seemed utterly illogical, to give up the safety and privilege of her life to pursue one with peril and most likely abject poverty.
The mainsail was dropped and he felt the tug of the wind on the ship. The day was bright and the breeze stiff enough to fill the sails. A white, foamy wake trailed behind them as they picked up speed. The breeze streamed through his hair and it felt exhilarating.
Joshua stood on the quarterdeck and surveyed the men going about the business of managing the ship. He wondered if he would have been a proper captain by now if it hadn't been for the unfortunate turn of events, his descent into piracy. Perhaps that had been inevitable, for as much as he loved the naval life, he had grown increasingly disgruntled with it and the policies instituted. The truth was that he wasn't sure that, despite the unfortunate incident, he would have been able to live with the things they did, particularly the protection of the slave trade and the men who operated it that had become endemic in this part of the world. Parliament felt this trade was vital to economic interest, hence, it continued even though many, including himself, found the business repugnant.
For this reason, he would never officially be welcome in the Royal Navy again, but it wasn't something he could bring himself to regret.
"Ship ahead," a boy yelled from up in the crow's nest. Bringing up his spyglass, Joshua scanned the horizon, seeing a merchant ship. Heavy and slow, they stood no chance—outclassed, outgunned and outmanned.
Somehow the girl had managed to talk a captain into taking her where she wanted to go. He had to appreciate the gumption and the sheer negotiating skills to achieve that. Or maybe she was just lucky to find a captain going her way.
By the direction of the ship, she was clearly heading back to Tortuga Bay, a place she knew little about, although she had revealed how impressed she was by Clara more than once. What exactly was going through the girl's mind? That she was going to find a sisterhood of female pirates? This girl had nothing to offer. As the cosseted daughter of the aristocracy, she had precious little of value to offer. Her skills with embroidery or servant management were hardly going to come in handy, were they?
It would take some time, but sure as day, they were steadily encroaching on the ship. He almost wished he had colors to fly, but the standard British flag flew at the stern.
"What do we do?" the sailing master said. "Should we bare guns? It's a merchant ship. I doubt they'll have much to come at us with."
"I’m sure that won’t be necessary." Although the captain of the merchant ship would see fairly quickly that it was a ship built for fighting following them. The British flag would avoid undo distress and hopefully any attempt to protect themselves.
As he expected, the merchant ship slowed as they approached, meeting the ship clearly in pursuit. The sailing master ordered the last of the sails lowered as they pulled alongside. Joshua could see the captain of the ship standing on the quarterdeck, surveying them.
"By your leave, I will come aboard," Joshua called when in shouting distance.
"If you must," the man with a white beard called back.
Slowly, they maneuvered close enough that the ships could be drawn together and a plank extended.
Joshua stepped across the planks. He'd done this so many times, it hardly fazed him boarding another ship. That sickening stench of fear was muted, but still there. Being chased down and boarded was to no one's liking.
"What has you interfering with our business? Naval ship without the royal seal."
"Admiral McKenna has lent me the ship," Joshua said, "as a passenger you carry, has not received leave to depart Port Royal."
"Is she a prisoner?" the man asked, clearly trying to protect the girl. In a quick span of time, the girl had secured the protection of what was clearly a wizened sea dog. Noteworthy.
"We are concerned for her safety. We believe she is acting irrationally due to trauma experienced in recent months."
"Or perhaps the girl seeks to escape an untenable position," the man said, eyeing him warily, as if it was him the girl was trying to flee. Now he wondered what the girl had told them, which could be any preposterous claim.
"She is the vice-admiral's daughter," Joshua said, and the man paled, even beneath his weather-beaten face. "I am returning her to her father."
"I see," the man said.
Joshua would have no more trouble from him. Raising the vice-admiral's ire was in no seafaring man's interest. "Where is she?"
"William, can you ask the lady to come on deck."
"Yes, sir," a young man said and disappeared below.
They waited a while. Silence reigned across both ships as all waited for Miss Lancaster to emerge. What kind of claim would she lodge then? No doubt, she would call him a liar, and he had no interest in standing here haggling with her.
She emerged looking regal, even in the plain dress he had initially found her in, a stiffness of spine he hadn't seen before. Yes, she was going to put on some kind of verbal claim.
Joshua's patience ran out. He marched over to her and as she tried to back away, he grabbed her and lifted her over his shoulder again—exactly as he had the first time. It was the most effective way of dealing with her, he decided. Protests squealed from her and again she pounded his back, ordering him to put her down.
Before anyone had time to react, he stepped over the planks between the ships and jumped down on his.
"Withdraw the plank and set sail," he ordered, dropping her down again. He made a saluting gesture to the other captain and watched the men push the two ships apart. Slowly they drifted away and the men went about the work of hoisting the sails again. He left her where he'd dropped her without another word and returned to the helm.
"You can't just kidnap me," she yelled. The men ignored her.
"You forget that I am a pirate. Boarding ships and carrying young women away is often what we do. It is, after all, what happened the first time you met a pirate, so how are you surprised?"
With pursed lips, she marched to the captain's quarters and slammed the door. With an eye roll, he ignored her. Her disapproval was hardly going to plague his conscience.
Chapter 11
"You have no right to do this," she said, glaring at him as he entered the cabin. "You have no right to chase me down and steal me off a ship. No right at all."
"Actually, your father would insist. He would hardly encourage you running away. Which is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. What were you thinking? What exactly are you hoping to achieve?"
"That is my affair. I'm choosing a different path from the one intended for me. I don't want to go back; I don't want to go back to that life."
"You mean the life where you are respected, where you are treated as a meaningful person, where you have everything in the world you could possibly want?"
"Except freedom. I've never been allowed to do what I want, and I never will be. I'm set to marry a man three times my age. I have no choice, no choices at all. And once I'm married, I am my husband's property." Her voice was turning shrill in frustration.
&nbs
p; "But to choose abject poverty instead is completely insane."
"Insane?" she repeated, already incensed without him insulting her. She stood in the middle of the cabin with her arms crossed tightly. Her mouth was a thin line, the corners of her lips drawn down with her displeasure. "You have no right to make decisions for me," she said again in a stern voice. How dared he interfere? From the moment she'd met him, he hadn't even bothered to listen to her for even a second.
Picking up a bowl, she flung it at him, which he easily evaded. Unsatisfied by this, she picked up a wooden cup and threw it, hitting him in the leg.
"You're being utterly childish," he accused. "How should anyone take you seriously if this is how you act?"
"Childish? Who are you calling childish? You're the one who's childish if you see a title and a big house as something worthy of pursuing as a goal."
"As opposed to running away to a pirate port with some ridiculous notion that you're going to find freedom. What you will find are people who use and abuse you. The Caribbean is not a kind place for women, particularly women who aren't protected by husbands."
"Perhaps you put too much faith in being protected. All my life I've been told I was too stupid to make a decision for myself. I can and I have. Should I just accept that—that you or my father knows better what gives me happiness? Is that your answer? You care nothing for my happiness and let's not pretend that you do."
"Perhaps you need protection from ill-conceived notions that happiness is found in Isla Rosa or Tortuga Bay."
"Clara did," she stated.
"Clara. You need to get over your high regard for Clara. Yes, what Clara has achieved was extraordinary, but she's also the daughter of the man who established the township and she had more help than you know. How do you think things would've gone for her otherwise? And what of the child? How is the child going to fare? That little town is a small place to be that child's entire world. Not to mention practically being born an outlaw."
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