by Marie York
I was still pissed at him, but my desire to let my inhibitions go even if it was just for a night overrode all my other thoughts. He held his hand out to me, and, willingly, I accepted it, shocked at how good it felt. His hand was large, and it completely engulfed mine, but nothing had ever seemed to fit so perfectly. It was as if it belonged there.
Bronx guided me through the groups of people to the middle of the dance floor, his hand running down my arm to my waist, and pulling me hard against him. I let the music control my movements, enjoying the way it took over completely.
Bronx’s body synced with mine, swaying with the beat. He tightened his hand on my waist as we continued to grind against one another, and the fire he started continued to build as desire shot straight to my core. It was a feeling that I had never experienced before. It had been a long time since I was with a guy, but this was different from anything I had ever felt with Pauly. I was so desperate for Pauly to like me, and desire me, that I found myself doing anything he wanted just to make that happen. The opposite was happening with Bronx. I wanted to resist him. The last thing I needed in my life right now was a guy. I had Joy to think about, and I would not let her be hurt by becoming attached to some guy who would never stick around. Unfortunately, my body disagreed with my logic because there was this undeniable pull that made my resistance to him next to impossible.
It was as if my body was drawn to his, two lost souls finally finding their way home. His fingers traced the bare skin of my shoulder, trailing its way to my neck. He brushed my hair out of the way, and traced the tiny star tattoo I had just behind my ear.
“Does this mean something?” he asked against my ear, and then pressed his lips to where the tattoo was.
I turned my mouth to his ear. “I don’t step down from a dare. Or, at least, I never used to.” I pulled back, catching his chocolate brown eyes. No matter all the reasons I should have, I couldn’t seem to look away.
He ran his thumb across my lip, and I swallowed as I tried to ignore the delicious sensations running through my body. “I dare you to kiss me,” he said, as he licked his lips.
I watched, mesmerized, as his tongue swiped across first his top then his lower lip. They were glistening with moisture, and everything inside of me told me to walk away. To get out before it was too late, but, for once in the time since I had Joy, I told those stupid voices to shut the fuck up and I crushed my lips to his.
Part 2
Scarred
Chapter 8
Bronx
It had been a week since Kenzie’s lips were on mine on the dance floor. A week of dealing with a raging hard-on every single time I thought about her. After she kissed me, she took off. By the time I got out of the club, she was already gone. So, I had walked back to my car home, and tried to sleep off the massive boner I had.
It was pointless. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw the low cut of her dress, the way it hugged her perfect ass and how it stopped just shy of her mid-thigh.
If I could have, I would have had her up against the nearest wall, but once she ran out, I remembered the words she spat at me that had me going to find her in the first place. Some sleazebag knocked her up, and the thought of her going through that alone sent a raging anger through me that made me see red. How could anyone do that to her? She wasn’t a girl you could dismiss, which is why I found myself walking to Lou’s a week later.
The girl had gotten into my head and, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t shake her. An elderly couple was coming out, and I held the door for them before going inside. I scanned the small place, looking for the girl with the bright green eyes and killer smile, but she was nowhere to be found.
“Can I help you?” A woman with an orange glow and way too much makeup asked.
“I was looking for Kenzie,” I said. “Would she happen to be here?”
“Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry to say, but you just missed her. She left here about twenty minutes ago.”
“Do you know where she was going?”
“She was taking her daughter out for the day. Didn’t exactly have a destination. She does that sometimes. Just goes out and walks until something catches her interest. But, let me tell you, there’s not much that can catch that girl’s attention,” she said with a wink, and I had the distinct feeling that we were not talking about Kenzie going for a walk.
“Okay…If you can just tell her Bronx stopped by, that’d be great.”
She gave me a wink. “Sure thing, cutie.”
I headed for the door and, with nowhere else to go, went for a walk myself, hoping I might bump into Kenzie and the kid.
A few hours later, hot and tired, I got back to my car. There was a piece of paper under the windshield wiper, and I prayed it wasn’t another goddamned ticket. I would just toss it in the glove box with the rest of them. I walked over to it, ready to do just that, when my eyes caught bubbly handwriting.
Meet me tomorrow at the gym. You know which one.
Kenzie
I folded the paper in half, and shoved it into my pocket, wondering what the hell this girl was planning.
* * *
It had been almost two years since I stepped foot into this gym. A few times, I thought about coming here to shower, but there were outside showers at the beach, and it was good enough for me. I hesitated outside the doors. It was all or nothing, and I was fucking ready.
Kenzie told me to meet her here for whatever reason and, after a week of not seeing her, I fought the urge to say fuck it and pushed through.
The feeling that I had every time I walked through those doors emerged through the darkness, and I felt like I was going home. Like the missing piece had finally been found. The smell of sweat and determination consumed my senses, as the sound of fists drilling into punching bags filled my ears.
I didn’t realize how much I missed it until I was completely surrounded by it. The thrill and excitement that had been long gone slammed into me at full force, just as I spotted Kenzie. She stood by the ring in a pair of tiny shorts, and a tank top, that made me want to throw a towel around her and carry her away from all of these guys. I could only imagine the thoughts running through their heads, and the only person I wanted to have any dirty thoughts about her was me.
“I got your note. What’s going on?” I asked, as I approached her.
I loved how her lips curled up at the corners when she saw me, and how she brushed her hair out of her face as if she wanted me to see all of her.
“I have a surprise for you,” she said, sticking her hands in her back pocket, and leaning back on her heels.
“What kind of surprise?”
She didn’t say anything, just nodded her head to something behind me. I turned around, and my heart nearly skidded to a halt. It had been two very long years since I had seen him. Two years since I let him down and never looked back.
“Ray,” I said, unable to believe that he was standing right there after all this time. He was still a stocky bastard with a salt and pepper buzzcut. He coached me from that very first day and, after I lost, I took off with not a single word. I disappeared off the radar because I honestly didn’t think he’d ever want to see me again.
“Bronx, it’s been a long time, brother,” he said.
My mouth parted, but I couldn’t manage to find words. I just stared at him, feeling like a piece of shit for taking off without a word. So, instead of speaking, I just nodded.
Kenzie joined us, and shook Ray’s hand. “I’m Kenzie. It’s a pleasure, Ray.”
“I appreciated the phone call,” he said.
She turned to me and bit her lip. “I hope you’re not mad. I just thought that maybe, if I helped you get back to the beginning, you’d see that it wasn’t so bad there and maybe it would be worth going back.”
It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me. I was too much of a gutless shit to pick up a phone and call Ray. And I didn’t know what to do without him.
“I’ll leave you two to talk. Stop by th
e diner later,” Kenzie said, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. She went to walk away, and I reached out, wrapping my hand around her wrist. I yanked her back to me. “Thank you,” I said, and, with a smile full of possibilities, she walked away.
“Ray, I don’t know what to say,” I finally managed. “I guess I fucked up.”
“You were on top, and you stumbled. And, instead of wiping off your wounds, you just up and quit.”
“I failed you.”
“You didn’t fail me. You worked your ass off to be there, but the other guy worked harder. It happens. You failed me when you took off. When you threw in the towel without even attempting to get back on top.”
“I was lost.”
“Well, it’s been two fucking years. Have you found your way yet?”
“I don’t think I ever really looked.” I scratched at my chin, and then met Ray’s eyes. “But, I’m looking now and walking in here was the first step. Seeing you just confirmed what I’ve been thinking for the past week. I’m ready to do this. I’m ready for a comeback.”
“Then, what the fuck are you waiting for? Get your ass in that ring, and show me what you got.”
Without a moment’s hesitation, I climbed through the ropes and went back to the place where I belonged.
Chapter 9
Kenzie
My heart had been in my throat since the minute I left the note on Bronx’s windshield. It really could have gone either way, and I was just thrilled that he wasn’t pissed at me. After our kiss, I wanted to help him. The anger I felt had evaporated, and I could see more clearly. He might have judged me, but that didn’t make him a bad person. How was he supposed to know about my past? I didn’t wear my scars for everyone to see like he did. I buried them beneath many layers, trying to forget they existed at all.
So, I decided to give Bronx the push he needed to get his old life back. It could have backfired. He could have stormed out of the gym, and never spoke to me again. Warmth spread through me, as I thought of the way he grabbed my wrist and yanked me back to him. How he uttered the words thank you, and how those two words held more emotion than any other words he’d ever said to me.
It was funny. I barely knew him, yet I felt like I had known him for years. It was unlike anything I had ever felt before, and I couldn’t wait to see him again. I stood behind the counter of Lou’s, and waited for table number three’s order.
Frieda came up behind me, and rested a hand on my shoulder as she passed. She leaned against the counter, and had that look of gossip on her face.
“So, how’d it go?” she asked. I had told her all about Bronx after I came back from putting the note on his windshield. Not that I had a choice. After he’d stopped by earlier that day, she wanted all the details, right down to his middle name, and I had no idea if he even had one. It made me realize that, even though I felt like I had known him forever, there was still so much about him that I didn’t know and I couldn’t wait to discover it all.
“It went better than expected.” I couldn’t hide the smile that was forcing itself wide across my face, so I let it show proudly.
She squealed with excitement, and I hushed her down with my hand. “Tell me all about it.”
“Not much to tell.”
“Sweetie, I have lived for over sixty years. There is always something to tell.”
I laughed, and then filled her in on all the boring details before getting to the heated thank you that had my heart pumping out of control.
“So, when are you seeing him again?” she asked.
“I told him to stop by here when he was done. And, I actually wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Of course. What is it, sweetie?”
I had thought about it for the past week, and wasn’t sure if it was the best idea. I was probably out of my fucking mind, but I knew what it was like to have nothing. “Bronx lives in his car, and the thought of him training all day and then sleeping in a car… Well, I just… I thought I might ask him if he’d want to stay here with me.”
“Oh,” Frieda said, crossing her arms over her large chest. “You barely even know the boy. Do you think that’s a smart choice? I mean, you have Joy to worry about too.”
“I know,” I interrupted her. “Trust me, I know how crazy it seems. But you took a chance on me, so I thought maybe you’d understand why I feel like I need to do this.”
Frieda took my hand and patted it. “I get it. Seeing anyone suffer a hardship is never easy. You can’t save the world though.”
“No, I can’t, but maybe I can save Bronx.”
“You do what you think is best. You don’t need my permission,” Frieda said.
“But, that’s your apartment.”
“No, sweetie. It is your apartment. As long as you and Joy are living there, it is yours and you are free to do what you’d like. I’m not going to tell you no, and I’m not going to tell you what I think you should do because this is a decision that only you have the right answer to. And, I think you already know.”
I nodded. “I do.”
“Just remember, Lou owns a shot gun. If I hear that boy so much as looks at you the wrong way, I will have him killed. You hear me?” I laughed, and Frieda waved her hand at me. “I ain’t kidding. You and Joy are my family, and I would kill for you. Never forget that.”
“I won’t.” Frieda held her arms open to me, and I gave her a hug. Frieda might not have been my mom, but she was the closest damn thing I had.
Frieda and Lou always wanted kids, but, after years of trying, they had to accept kids weren’t in the cards for them. I liked to think that we found each other to fill a void that we were both missing from our lives. With me, came a built-in granddaughter who they loved as their own.
The bell above the door clinked, and I turned, just as Joy squirmed her way out of Lou’s arms and took off running. “Momma! Momma!” she called out as she weaved her way through the tables.
“Hey, baby. Did you have fun at the park with Pappy?” I asked, giving her a kiss on the cheek.
She swiped the kiss off her face, and went into a long-winded description of her day at the park. It included everything from the seagulls they saw, and the dog they got to pet, down to the ice cream Lou bought her. I swore my daughter was going to turn into an ice cream.
“Sounds like you had fun,” I said, glancing up to Lou, who looked like he needed a nap and maybe a beer.
“You okay?” I asked him, and he nodded.
“I’m good. But keeping up with this one is harder than manning the kitchen back there. How do you do it?” he asked. Lou was used to hanging out with Joy in the diner, or at his house, when Frieda was with him. He rarely went out just the two of them.
“Now, do you understand why I drink so much of that energy stuff?”
“Makes perfect sense.” Lou sat down at the counter, and waved his hand to Frieda. “Water and something greasy,” he said.
“How about water and a salad?” Frieda said, placing a plate of leafy greens in front of him. She had been forcing him to change his diet ever since his doctor voiced his concern about Lou’s blood pressure.
Like a child, he frowned at the salad and pushed the leaves around with his fork. “This isn’t food. It’s rabbit food!”
“It’s still food,” Frieda said. “Now quit your whining and eat it.”
“Order up,” Rico called out and hit the bell.
I hurried over, picked up table three’s order and dropped it off. When I turned to head back to the counter, my eyes locked on Bronx’s. He stood just inside the doorway, a crooked smile on his face, and a new light in his eyes.
As soon as I saw him, I lost all control of my lips as they tugged wide across my face. Heat rose in my cheeks, and I felt like I was thirteen again with my first crush.
“Hey,” I said, finding my usual confidence.
“Hey to you too,” he replied.
“So, how’d it go?”
“Fucking amazing.”
A ti
ny gasp came from beneath us, and I looked down to see Joy shyly hiding behind my legs. She wrapped her tiny fingers round my leg, and then peered out. “I don’t think the soap worked,” she said. “I think you need the blue one.”
Bronx bent at the knees down to Joy’s height. “Sorry, short stack,” he said, and then reached out to lightly pinch her cheek.
Her grip tightened on my leg, and she quickly turned her head into my thigh. Bronx laughed, and stood back up.
“So,” I said, just as Frieda came over and scooped Joy up.
“Take a break,” Frieda said to me. “I got your tables, and Lou has this one.” She hugged Joy tightly to her chest, and swung her back and forth. Joy showed her approval by letting out a loud squeal.
“Thanks,” I mouthed to Frieda before she disappeared behind the counter with Joy. “Let’s go upstairs and talk,” I suggested.
“Sure,” Bronx said, and then followed me up the stairs into my apartment.
I had stepped out on a stage, and stripped down to nothing but a g-string, without a second thought, but being alone in my apartment with Bronx terrified me. Not because I was afraid of him, but because I was afraid of the way he made me feel. Just being near him caused my heart to race, and my core to tingle. And, how my desire for him, could only be described as finding water in a desert after being lost for days, desperate and unyielding.
“Do you want anything to drink?” I asked. “We don’t keep booze in the house,” I quickly added. “It’s either, water, apple juice, or milk.”
“That’s fine. Water would be great.”
I grabbed a cup from the cabinet, and then grabbed my filtered pitcher out of the fridge. I may not have been looking at Bronx, but I could feel his eyes on me, following me from counter to fridge and back.