Ivy steps up, and that sour scowl she’s donned lets me know she heard every word. “What’s this? I think not. Carlotta, as a civilian you are welcome to offer as many tips as you wish, but I strictly forbid you from putting yourself in any dangerous situations. You’re unarmed and untrained. Leave this to the professionals. You are not one of us.”
How I hate when she uses my formal name. And how I hate it even more when she reminds me I’m an untrained professional.
Everett wraps an arm around my shoulder and navigates me back into the crowded foyer before my vocal cords can unleash their fury.
“That woman!”
“Is right.” Everett steps in front of me. That stern look on his face makes me realize he means it. “You need to keep safe, Lemon. You’re my top priority, and I’ll step in myself if I think you’re putting yourself in a dangerous situation.”
I can’t help but bite down on my lower lip. Everett is alarmingly sexy when he’s being overprotective.
“You have nothing to worry about,” I assure him. “That’s because I’ll be dragging you with me on each of my adventures. You make a mighty fine bodyguard, you know that, Baxter?” I came this close to calling him Essex before resisting the urge. The venue is questionable at best, and the last thing I want is to say it for the first time at a horrific crime scene.
The crowd erupts in murmurs and shouts as Pepper Patrick’s security force hustles her back out. I spot Lainey behind them as she claps her hands over her head in an effort to garner everyone’s attention.
“No one is allowed to leave the building before giving your information to the sheriff’s department!” she shouts. “They are stationed at the door, so please form single file lines. There are six sheriffs available to take your information! Pepper Patrick has announced that due to unforeseen circumstances she’ll be staying on in Honey Hollow until she is cleared to leave—and before her departure, she has agreed to do a quick reading—to be announced!”
The room erupts with cheers, and I feel ten times worse for poor Rhonda.
The brilliant blue macaw swoops over the crowd and lands on my sister’s shoulder as she makes her way over.
“The bird!” I squawk to Everett. “It’s sitting on Lainey’s shoulder. Here, give me your hand.”
Everett is quick to clasp onto me. It turns out, we discovered last month that if he’s holding my hand he can hear the dead, too. My body must act as some supernatural conduit. Just my luck.
“Did you hear that?” Lainey practically beams. “She’s coming back!”
“And Rhonda Gilbert is dead,” I say in an effort to temper her enthusiasm.
The bird lifts its beak a notch. “Rhonda Gilbert is dead! Rhonda Gilbert is dead!”
Everett shudders a moment. “Geez,” he whispers.
“I know. I can never get used to it.”
Lainey winces. “Me either. But guess what? Pepper Patrick is staying at Mom’s B&B!”
Just as I’m about to come down on my sister for her unbridled passion for the author at this horrific time, my other sister Meg jumps over her back as if she were about to tackle her to the ground.
Meg was born blonde but dyes her locks a shocking stark black. It really does bring out the ice blue in her eyes, though.
“You found another one, huh, Lot?” She attempts to slap me five, but I outright refuse.
Keelie comes over along with her twin sister Naomi. Keelie is a perky, bubbly blonde, and Naomi—well, she too has dyed her blonde locks black, but on Naomi it looks anything but scary. Both Naomi and Keelie are unfairly gorgeous women no matter what color their hair might be.
Keelie picks up my hand. “Lottie, tell me we’re going to solve another case!”
The macaw flaps its enormous wings, batting Lainey in the face, and she tries to wave it off as if it were a fly.
“Solve a case! Solve a case!”
Keelie pulls her hand back as if she were plucking it from a fire. “What the heck was that?” She glances up toward the ceiling, looking every which way.
“That was me.” I clear my throat. “Solve a case!” I say a little too cheerfully. “My throat’s just raw from crying, that’s all.”
Keelie makes a face. “Whatever, sister. Just be sure to hunt me down before you get to the good part. And by good part, I’m talking naked yoga and pole dancing.”
Meg gives a little hop. “Oh hell, mark me down for the fun stuff, too.”
I can’t help but make a face at the two of them. “This isn’t going to be fun.”
Lainey moans while massaging her shoulder that the bird is currently digging its claws into. “You know what’s not fun? This ache in my back.” She glances to the door and waves Jana March and Willow over. “I’m so sorry this has happened,” she says as they fill in our circle. “If you need me to find another wedding planner, I totally understand.”
“No way,” Jana is quick to refute the idea. “We’re still on.”
Willow is quick to nod. “And I’ll keep the flower shop going as long as Felicity needs me to. I live for that place.”
Lainey gives an appreciative shrug. “Thank you both. I’m sure Rhonda would have wanted it that way.”
The crowd begins to disperse as Jana and Willow take off to speak with Noah. Lainey gives me a quick embrace.
“I’d better get back to work. This is a real mess.”
“Okay, but don’t overdo it. You were a part of this nightmare, too,” I say, gently shoving the bird off her shoulder and it flies toward a beam up by the ceiling.
Meg grunts, “I’d better head back to Leeds. The boss wants me to train the girls to do a wrestling routine. They’re even talking about opening up a jelly pit in the back.”
Everett tips his head back. “Female wrestling at its finest.”
Meg slaps him five. “That’s what I’m talking about. This one’s a keeper, Lot. Good move kicking that fake cop to the curb. Why deal with a stubby little badge when you can have a man who knows how to wield his gavel?” She and Lainey take off, and I can’t help but scowl at the horny judge by my side.
“Female wrestling at its finest? Really, Everett?”
A soft chuckle bounces through him, but his lips never crack a smile. “I was employing sarcasm, Lemon. But if you’re ever up for wrestling it out in jelly, I’m your man.”
“That might just be the sweetest thing anyone’s said to me all day. And I mean sweetest literally. I’ve seen that spa tub in your master bath, and as a baker I do have access to industrial-sized vats of jelly. You like raspberry?” I cringe as I realize what just flew from my lips. I can’t help it. I talk when I’m nervous, and it just so happens that discovering corpses makes me very darn nervous.
Everett’s lips curl at the tips. “Raspberry is my second favorite flavor.”
“What’s your first?”
His lids hood a notch. “Lemon.”
A group of men walk in wheeling a gurney in front of them. “Coming through!” they shout. Their dark blue windbreakers are emblazoned with the word Coroner in all caps, and I shiver at the sight of it. No matter how many times I’ve seen them, I can never get used to their presence. And I suddenly feel like an animal for flirting shamelessly with Everett.
“It’s starting again, Everett. And sadly, I’m afraid this will never end.”
Everett warms my back with his strong hand as he pulls me in close.
Sometimes, there are simply no words.
Chapter 4
The Cutie Pie Bakery and Cakery is quiet the next morning. In fact, all of Main Street looks like a ghost town. If it weren’t for the soft music playing over the speakers, it would be crickets in here. And despite the scent of fresh baked chocolate chip cookies filtering through the air, it doesn’t do a thing to make me feel better. I wrap my arms around myself as I stare vacantly out the lattice windows. I can remember a time when Honey Hollow felt like the safest place on Earth, devoid of any sort of crime, and here we are with an entire slew of murders
on our back.
I slept in past my alarm this morning, just taking a moment to snuggle with my sweet Himalayan cats, Pancake and Waffles. They were both gifted to me by Nell Sawyer, my maternal grandmother, whom I didn’t even realize was related to me until she passed away. It turns out, Carlotta, my biological mother, was her niece that she raised as her own. And since Nell is my best friend Keelie’s grandmother, that makes us family, but, of course, we’ve been that all along. How I wish Nell were still here. Surely she would know what to do about my increasing penchant of stumbling upon bodies. And even if she hadn’t a clue, she would still be the greatest support in the world.
The door chimes and I look over, hopeful to find Nell herself strolling on in, but it’s not Nell. It’s that wily niece I was talking about.
“Carlotta—” I start to head over and freeze a moment as that oversized bird glides right through the glass and lands on her shoulder.
“Oh, you—get away.” She’s quick to shoo the beautiful creature, and it flies over and finds a home on the register. Carlotta shares my supersensual gift, only she’s never actually had the misfortune of stumbling upon a body. And not only that, but she hasn’t had a deceased creature or person appear to her personally—or at least not recently, but she’s certainly privy to seeing the ones that appear to me.
“How is Felicity holding up? Is there anything I can do?” I ask as Carlotta plops down on one of the pastel blue seats. My ex, Bear, helped Nell and me put the bakery together. It was his idea to paint the furniture in every shade of pastel, and I happen to love the mix and match look. The butter yellow walls always feel as if they’re giving me a hug when I step inside in the morning. On the left, there’s an open walkway to the Honey Pot Diner, and the large resin oak tree staked in the middle of it with its branches wrapped in twinkle lights extends right over the ceiling of my café as well. It makes for perfectly magical ambiance, and the customers seem to love it. Nell owned the Honey Pot Diner—heck, she owned almost all of the real estate on Main Street.
Carlotta growls as Lily brings her a cup of coffee and a cranberry scone.
Lily hitches a free strand of hair behind her ear. “I heard Felicity can’t even get out of bed. That detective you dated grilled her for hours, and now she feels like a suspect in her own mother’s murder.” Lily scowls at me before heading back to her post.
“Noah was just doing his job,” I point out.
“Oh yeah?” Carlotta grunts. “Was it his job to shut down the flower shop and scour it for clues—for a crime that wasn’t even committed on its premises?”
I scuttle over to the window and, sure enough, The Enchanted Flower Shop is surrounded with patrol cars.
“It’s just routine,” I say, trying to calm Carlotta’s budding anger as I traipse right back to her. “Did you talk to Felicity? Is she going to keep the shop open?”
“Oh, of course, she is. She has Willow to help her. That’s about as good as having Rhonda there. Felicity and I hardly know how to answer the phone, but Willow knows how to put in the orders and deal with anything that has to do with the files on the computer. As soon as Felicity is feeling up to it, Willow will show her the ropes. Closing it would be foolish. That place is a cash cow. Do you know what kind of a markup we get away with? It’s murder, I tell you. And don’t think I didn’t mind the pun.” She blinks a quick smile. “So go ahead and ask me.”
“Ask you what?” It’s safe to say I’ve been leery of this woman who bore me ever since we met last January.
“Who did it.”
The giant bird swoops over and lands a talon over her scone and, sure enough, the sweet treat is quickly crumbled to pieces. Thank God there wasn’t a patron in here sitting close enough to spot the culinary madness. The last thing I need is rumors circulating that I sell brittle scones.
“Who did it?” the bird squawks unreasonably loud. “Who did it?”
“My goodness.” I wince as I take a seat next to Carlotta. “Must it say everything twice?”
“I don’t see why not. Rhonda did.”
“All right, get to the nitty gritty. Who did it?”
“I don’t know. That’s for you to find out.” She takes a careful sip of her coffee. “But that daughter of hers is creepy, weird, and so are all of her boyfriends.”
“Boyfriends?”
“That big bumbling Bear for starters. He’s got a roaming eye. Anyone can see that.”
I don’t say a word. It’s not important to mention that Bear was my first love. Like ever.
“And that Simon, the comic shop owner slash UFO chaser? He’s a real nutcase. But the one that came before the nutcase, he’s the scary one.” Her eyes bug out as she shudders.
“What’s his name?”
“Ringo…Bingo? I don’t know. But, believe me, it’s something equally ridiculous.”
“Ringo Bingo?” I look to the sweet beautiful bird. No matter how intimidating its size might be, it’s an amazing specimen that demands my attention. “Does that ring a bell?”
Its head juts and pecks, but it says absolutely nothing.
“Okay, I’m giving you homework.” I look to my bio mother. “Find out his name. I saw Felicity speaking to some unsavory looking, unkempt—”
“That’s him!” She snaps a finger my way. “Boho Jojo. Something like that.”
The door chimes, and a small crowd presses its way inside.
“Keep thinking,” I say as I get up to greet my customers and freeze once I spot a couple of blonde ponytails in the back. Cormack Featherby and Britney Fox.
Dear Lord, as much as my supersensual abilities might feel like a curse, their presence trumps my voyeuristic talent to see the dead any day of the week.
Britney lifts a freshly painted red fingernail my way. “Class just got out. I recommended they come in for a quick calorie or two.” She winks my way and leans in. “Got to keep those wheels spinning, if you know what I mean.”
“Funny.”
Britney happens to own an entire slew of Swift Cycle gyms, and she just opened one down the street a few weeks back. As much as I wish Noah’s ex would hop on her broomstick and head back to Ohio, it doesn’t look like that will be happening anytime soon.
Cormack muses at the cookies in the display window. “Lolly, please box up a dozen or so of Noah’s favorite yum-yums. Brit here says you’d know exactly what they are.”
My mouth falls open. “It’s Lottie,” I say as I head behind the counter and pick up a box, quickly filling it with the hard biscotti he’s only tried once and quickly eschewed.
“Here you go—all his favorite yum-yums,” I say, handing them over. “Usually Noah comes in and orders them himself.”
Cormack turns to Brit, and they share a chortling laugh. “You might say I’m trying to win back my man. Brit here is totally fine with this. I would never want to step on anyone’s toes.” Her celadon green eyes widen as she looks my way. “And you’re really a lucky girl, Molly. Essex is such a great catch. How in the world you got him to commit, and with a ring even! Hey, let’s see it.” She cranes her neck, and I’m quick to hide my very naked finger. That’s right. Thanks to Everett’s plan to trick his family into believing we’re engaged a few months back, Cormack thinks the same by default.
“We don’t do rings.” I frown as I say it. “Too materialistic.”
Cormack tips her head back and laughs, exposing a row of perfectly straight white teeth that look as if they were plucked right out of the mouth of some A-list Hollywood starlit. “Well, anytime you want to have a gab session about that hunk of a man and everything he’s capable of—and I do mean everything—let me know. We can exchange notes.” She shakes her shoulders when she says it. “Hey, I know! We should totally double date! Noah just loves the two of you to pieces.” She plops down a twenty on the counter. “In fact, I’ll head over and suggest it right now.” She swings her perky little ponytail right out of here in an attempt to snag my man, and my adrenaline hikes to unsafe levels.
<
br /> “Down, girl.” Britney folds her arms over her chest. “You’re not over Noah, are you?”
“Your presence sort of closed the door rather abruptly on our relationship. I guess you can say I haven’t quite healed yet.”
She rolls her eyes. “And you’re already bedding Essex?”
My ears pique when she calls him by his proper moniker.
“What did you just call him?”
“Relax.” She’s back to averting her eyes. “I’ve never slept with him. Cormack explained the entire asinine name thing to me. There isn’t a man on this planet who tells me what to call him and when.” She leans in, and a single strand of creamy blonde hair falls over one eye as if it were required by law to be there. “If you’re smart, you’ll get a backbone and start commanding that two-man circus you’ve got going. You’re the boss, Lonely. Not the other way around.” She takes her coffee from Lily and heads out the door.
“It’s Lottie,” I call out after her. But I don’t think the fact she called me Lonely was an accident.
Great. Now I have a potential double date with my ex, and I have Noah’s wife doling out relationship advice to me. What else could possibly go wrong today?
The door chimes and in walks everything that is wrong with this world. Curtis Vanderlin has an arm wrapped around Rigby Emerson’s shoulders as they make their way over.
Rigby looks decidedly angry and rightly so. Her aunt was just slaughtered in cold blood.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were his ex?” Her tiny elf-like features are knotted up with rage.
My head inches back, and a choking sound emits from my throat.
Curt nods over at me with that silly smirk I’ve come to loathe almost as much as I loathe the one who wears it.
“I told her how special you were to me, Lot. I told her I still have feelings. Rigby and I have an honesty policy. One hundred percent truth, one hundred percent of the time.”
“Well then, she should be well aware of the fact you are a one hundred percent idiot,” I’m quick to inform him of nothing but the truth.
New York Cheesecake Chaos (MURDER IN THE MIX Book 8) Page 4