“I’m so sorry to put you out like this,” Kristina said quickly. “I can always make other arrangements…”
“That is not why I bring it up,” Emma interrupted her. “I bring it up because I realize that you and my son have a relationship of sorts?”
Kristina shook her head. “I wouldn’t call it a relationship… we’re friends…”
“You don’t sound sure,” Emma said with raised eyebrows.
“I… guess I’m not,” Kristina said with a sigh. “It’s complicated.”
“Most things concerning Keith usually are,” Emma nodded. “But I do know this much… if he brought you here, it is because he cares for you.”
“He feels guilty for bringing me into this,” Kristina said. “There’s a difference.”
Emma seemed to consider that. “Yes, guilt is a part of it,” she conceded. “But there’s more there.”
“If it’s all the same to you,” Kristina said slowly, “I’d rather not believe that.”
Emma looked at her carefully, and then she gave her a small smile. “Will you help me set the table for dinner?”
“Of course,” Kristina nodded as she rose and followed Emma into the kitchen.
Chapter Eighteen
Keith
Keith stood on the corner of the street while his take out meal was being prepared. He felt himself bounce on the soles of his feet as his nerves increased. He wondered what his mother would tell Kristina; he wondered if they would have anything to talk about; he wondered if it had been a mistake bringing Kristina there.
His mind raced with uncertainty as he retraced the moments that led to his decision. He had just calmed himself down when he had received the second call from Kristina. He had hoped that it would turn out to be nothing, even as he answered the phone, but her voice had betrayed that hope from the first. She sounded worse than she had that morning when she had called him the first time. Once Keith heard what the note that had been thrown through Kristina’s window had said, he had almost flown into a full-fledged rage. He had dashed his lampshade against the wall, obliterating it with one blow.
Once his breathing had calmed down, he had picked up the phone without thinking and called his mother. “What is it, darling?” Emma has asked with concern. “You don’t sound good.”
“I need a favor, Mom,” Keith had asked. “A big one.”
“Of course,” Emma had replied readily. “You know you can ask me anything.”
“I have this friend… she needs a place to stay for a few days,” Keith had gone on, stumbling over his own words. “Somewhere safe.”
“What is she running from?” Emma had asked.
“She’s not running,” Keith had replied. “I just need to make sure she’s safe.”
There had been a moment of silence. “What are you keeping her safe from?” Emma had asked, cutting to the heart of the matter.
“The Rusted Chains,” Keith had replied through gritted teeth. “They’re tailing her.”
“Why?”
Keith closed his eyes; they felt weighted down with regret. “Because of me,” was all he said.
He had expected his mother to continue questioning him, but she seemed to cut their conversation short. “I’ll get the spare room ready,” she said.
“I’ll have her there within the hour,” Keith said before he hung up.
He had driven from his place to the campus and then to his mother's house, all the while trying to maintain some semblance of calm so that he wouldn’t overly agitate Kristina. He knew that she was already shaken up; he didn’t want to make that worse. Still, he had been unable to resist the urge to ask for the note that had been tied to the brick. He knew he had to see the words in order to truly believe them.
He could still see the words, almost as though they were etched at the back of his eyelids. ‘Do you know what happens to little girls who fuck big bikers named Keith’, the note had read. ‘They die. So I’d be careful… there are monsters in the night and they’re watching you now.’
His name had been written there clear as day, further proof that he was the one who was solely responsible for dragging Kristina into the middle of a growing gang battle. Keith couldn’t believe he had been so naïve as to believe that this wouldn’t happen again. He thought about all those times he had sworn off women just so that he could avoid this very situation. It was almost as though the moment had crept up on him while he wasn’t looking and made him do the very thing he had sworn he would never do again.
“Hey man?” a voice yelled from the corner. “Your food’s ready.”
Keith took the package that was held out to him and made his way back to the house. He didn’t want his mother telling Kristina more than she needed to know. He didn’t want her pity, and he didn’t want her to know more about him than she already did. It set a bad precedent, and he didn’t want her to feel as though their relationship was more than it was.
When he walked through the door, he was greeted by the sound of chatter and mild laughter wafting through from the kitchen while the sitting room stood empty. Sighing, he moved into the kitchen to find Emma and Kristina sitting by the circular table with large glasses of lemonade in hand. The sight of them sent a wave of calm over him and Keith was able to push aside his worry and anger for a moment. He joined them at the table and set the takeout in its center.
“You started without me,” he said.
“Just the conversation,” Emma said. “It’s a good thing you got here when you did. I was starting to get hungry.”
They tucked into the dinner in silence, and it gave Keith some time to reflect on the comfort that had crept in between his mother and Kristina. The awkwardness of the moments before he had left them had disappeared. Now there was the sense of ease that pervaded through the air. Even in silence he could find no tension or discomfort.
“What did you’ll talk about while I was out?” Keith couldn’t help but ask. Simple curiosity forced the question from his lips, but he also wanted to make sure that his mother hadn’t divulged more than she should have.
“Just this and that,” Emma replied with an evasive smile. “Do you know that Kristina is graduating with a degree in sociology?”
“I didn’t know that,” Keith said, forking noodles into his mouth.
“What do your parents do, Kristina?” Emma asked conversationally.
“My mother is a doctor,” Kristina replied. “And my father is a lawyer.”
Emma raised her eyebrows, and Keith wished that she didn’t look so impressed. “I never went to college myself… I only had the one brother, and he died in his twenties. I always nursed the hope that Keith would go on day…”
“Maybe he still can,” Kristina suggested.
“That life is not for me,” Keith said more harshly than he had intended. “I knew it then and I know it now. More so than ever.”
Kristina fell silent and looked down at her bowl of noodles, but Emma seemed unperturbed by Keith’s rough nature. “He always felt like the college route was too rigid…”
“He’s not wrong,” Kristina said slowly. “Sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision in going at all.”
Emma looked at her with curiosity and Keith had to admit that it surprised him, too. “Do you really?” Emma asked.
“Yes,” Kristina nodded.
“Why is that?”
“I just… feel as though maybe I’ve missed out on things because of it. I wish that I had taken a few years off after high school… I wish I had travelled a little, seen the world... and then maybe I would have been more able to appreciate the college experience.”
“That… makes sense,” Keith said after a moment. “You can still travel the world, you know.”
“I know,” Kristina nodded. “But it’s different now once you’ve got a fresh degree in your hands. You almost feel obligated to go out and get a job, start paying off the loans and contributing to society in some way.”
“Fuck society,” Keith sai
d. “The only thing you should be concerned with is yourself.”
“Keith!” Emma exclaimed as though she were ashamed. “That language has no place at the dinner table.” If it had been any other day on any other moment, Keith might have laughed it off. “Sorry,” he mumbled instead and focused once again on his food.
“I’m sorry about him, Kristina,” Emma said, shaking her head in Keith’s direction. “I raised him better than that.”
Keith didn’t look directly at her, but he could see the smile that Kristina was trying hard to keep off her face. “Don’t worry about it, Emma,” she said easily. “I’ve heard the word before… even at the dinner table. My parents swear like sailors.”
Emma laughed at that. “Do they?”
“You’d expect them to be more dignified,” Kristina went on. “But they’re not.”
Emma smiled. “Well that does make me feel a little better.”
Keith rolled his eyes and reached for the pitcher of lemonade. “Do you have any booze in the house?”
“Just beer,” Emma replied.
“What about some tequila?”
Emma frowned at him. “No, I don’t,” she said. “It’s getting late, and Kristina looks tired. Maybe we should just say goodnight? I’ll take care of the dishes.”
“Fine,” Keith said shortly. “I’ll show Kristina to her room.”
He rose, and Kristina followed him. He heard her thank his mother, and then they moved out of the kitchen and into the narrow corridor where the rooms were located. “This one is yours,” he indicated, as he pushed open the door. He usually crashed in this room whenever he decided to spend the night at his mother’s; the last time had been months ago now. The room was small, but Emma always kept it clean and tidy. Keith set down Kristina’s duffel bag by the bed and turned to her.
She looked particularly small in the room beside him, and Keith was conscious of what a giant he must seem to her. He was very aware that he should be saying goodnight and leaving her to the room, but for some reason he couldn’t bring himself to leave.
“Thank you,” Kristina said slowly. “You’re doing so much for me.”
“I’m the one who brought you into this mess,” Keith said quickly. “I should be the one to make sure you’re safe. I would do it for anyone,” he added quickly, hoping she would understand what he meant by that.
“You would?” Kristina asked.
“Yes,” Keith said firmly.
Kristina nodded as understanding flooded through her face. “Got it,” she said, as she turned and sat down on the bed. Again, Keith knew it was time for him to go, and yet he stayed his ground.
“I’ll be in tomorrow to check on you,” he said.
“You don’t have to do that,” Kristina said quickly. “I’ll be fine here. I have to go back on Tuesday anyway. My classes start up again.”
“I’ll assign someone to you.”
“Excuse me?” Kristina asked.
“Once your classes start… you will need someone watching over you…”
“Why?” Kristina demanded.
“I think we’ve established why,” Keith said incredulously.
“That’s unnecessary.”
“That note was real, Kristina,” Keith said forcefully.
“I’ll admit I was terrified a few hours ago,” Kristina said calmly. “But it was just a threat. I don’t think they’re really going to hurt me.”
Keith felt the need to take a deep breath. “You are severely underestimating these men, Kristina,” he said fiercely. “They are capable of much more than people could even imagine. These guys… they don’t pay attention to things like the law. It’s a nonentity for them, which makes them much more dangerous than any other criminal out there.”
“Is that the kind of gang you belong to as well?” Kristina asked.
Keith sighed, knowing he had walked right into that one. “I… we… take loopholes,” he conceded reluctantly. “But we don’t deal in the same kind of trade that the Chains deal in. Their trade is much more brutal, and that makes them brutal as well.”
“They’re not going to do anything to me,” Kristina said again. She sounded as though she were trying to convince herself.
“You don’t know them,” Keith said through gritted teeth. “You don’t know this world. You have no idea… no idea… this is not some high school drama. When shit goes down in this part of town… people do die.”
“I’m not an idiot,” Kristina snapped as she stood suddenly, throwing Keith off guard for a moment. “So don’t treat me like one.”
“I didn’t mean—”
“Goodnight,” Kristina said abruptly, cutting him off.
Keith stared at her furious face for a moment, and then he nodded once, before turning and leaving the room.
Emma was sitting in the living room, waiting for him. “Is everything ok?” she asked.
“Everything is fine,” Keith said testily, and Emma’s eyebrows rose immediately. Keith sighed and took a seat opposite her. “I’m just… stressed out,” he said shortly.
“And how is Kristina?” Emma asked pointedly.
“Shaken I think,” Keith replied. “But like all strong women, she doesn’t want to show it.”
“You seem to be a little worse off than she is,” Emma observed gently.
Keith dropped his head for a moment. “I can’t believe this is happening again.”
“You should have told me about her,” Emma said.
“There was no need,” Keith said stubbornly. “We’re not together; she’s not my girlfriend. She’s just a girl I happen to know.”
“Kovic wouldn’t be so interested in her if she was really just a girl you happen to know,” Emma said shrewdly. “You and I both know that.”
“Mom…” Keith said warningly.
“This is all a big, stupid mistake,” Keith said. “Kovic saw us together one time, and he decided that it meant something.”
“I think you’re the one who decided it meant something by how much time you’ve been spending with her,” Emma said gently.
“How do you know how much time I’ve been spending with her?” Keith demanded.
“Kristina and I were talking before dinner.”
Keith sighed. “I knew it was a bad idea to leave you with Kristina.”
“Don’t be rude.”
Keith smiled. “I’m not being rude. I’m being honest.”
Emma gave him a look, and then she returned his smile. “I like her.”
Keith felt delight flood through him, and immediately he felt like an idiot for having the feeling at all. He shouldn’t want his mother’s approval, mainly because there was no relationship in existence for her to approve. He was not a boy who needed permission. He was a man who knew he had made a mistake.
“I wouldn’t get too close if I were you,” Keith said, hardening to his new purpose. “She’s not going to be around for long.”
Emma sighed. “I wish you’d stop being so cold all the time, Keith. It’s not a uniform you’re forced to wear every day.”
“Unfortunately, I choose to,” Keith snapped. “I can’t believe you of all people are pushing this?”
“What does that mean?” Emma asked defiantly.
“More than anyone else I know, you were the one who saw how much Natalie’s death cost me,” Keith said, looking his mother in the eye. “You alone knew how much I suffered after I was forced to bury her. I can’t believe that after all that you’d want me to go through the same thing again.”
“You’re assuming it will be the same thing again,” Emma pointed out.
“And it will be,” Keith went on. “If I pursue a relationship with Kristina… which is exactly why I’m not going to.”
“So that is the only reason,” Emma latched onto his words.
“No,” Keith said quickly, trying to correct the mistake. “That’s not the only reason.”
“That’s what you said.”
“But it’s not what I meant,
” he insisted. “It is a part of it, but the bigger reason is that I don’t want a relationship period…and especially not with Kristina.”
Emma seemed taken aback by that. “And why not?” she asked.
“Come on, Mom,” Keith said as he shook his head.
She stared at him for a moment. “You’re going to have to explain that to me, because I don’t know what you mean by it.”
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