She had been totally his. Their ardent kisses and intimate caresses, which only exist between two experienced lovers, could only be explained by a mutual desire that they felt for each other. Hers was long lasting, given her insistence; his, on the other hand, was just spur of the moment, something whose flame was consumed by the wind. Even with all her impetuosity, Lorena was not only beautiful, but also very intelligent. In other circumstances, he would have indulged, but now, after getting married, it would be impossible. It was better for things to happen this way. Once she married Atílio, Lorena would not have time to bother him, and soon everything would be peaceful again!
• • •
The month of November had ended.
Carolina waited for her friend to announce her wedding to Atílio, but the bride made no manifestation. Nobody knew any of the details of the ceremony. Only during the week prior to the wedding did the invitations arrive, and the surprise of the invited guests concerning that matrimony doesn't even need major comments. Although the news was sudden, all the guests were defeated by their curiosity to see the bride of the honorific Count of Assis.
• • •
Finally, the eighth of December of 1884 had arrived. Lorena was dressed in white, as the most virtuous of the brides, for her pregnancy could still not be noticed. She was already at the door of that little chapel called Nossa Senhora de Copacabana, where all were waiting for her. Even though it was a small ceremony with few guests, it was impossible for such an event not to attract the attention of some of the curious people of that parish. There she was, ornate with a long train and a beautiful bouquet of flowers, arm and arm with her father. From her point of view, Lorena could glimpse the figure of the groom who, anxious, was already waiting for her at the altar. She looked around searching for her friends’ faces, her relatives and other acquaintances, which were all waiting expectantly for the beginning of the ceremony. She took some more steps while she heard the noise of the old pipe organ playing the wedding march. However, those who contemplated the scene could not imagine the great anguish that filled the spirit of the young lady. Behind that white gown, the train and the tiara, there was a shadowy, heavy and dark mourning in her soul. Hidden under the bouquet of white roses — a funeral crown prepared for her tomb. As if in a supposed final judgment, Lorena weighted her actions, everything she had lived through months before the Cassino since she had seen Rafael again and known Atílio. Would that be her destiny? To get married with a man she didn't love and have to renounce her romantic ideals? And thinking about that, she arrived at the altar.
When Mr. Gaspar gave her to Atílio, Lorena realized that it was a one-way street. She knew she didn't love him, but what to do? To become the shame of her parents? The man standing right by her side was giving proof of his great generosity, accepting her in such conditions — deflowered and expecting a child from another man. She could not even pay attention to the priest’s sermon. She would say yes, I do, and then all would be finished. She felt like she represented a false image of a virtuous woman to all guests present. And the most absurd in all of this is that Atílio also knew about it! Kneeling by the altar, she dared to look to her right hand side, and her eyes crossed exactly with those of Rafael. He didn't look away and, Lorena, shyly, closed her eyes. It was then that Atílio’s voice, approaching her ear discreetly, alerted her:
“Lorena, it is time to say yes or no.”
The young lady, suddenly regaining her consciousness, returned to the reality of that moment. The priest asked the same question again, the one she had always dreamed of saying yes, I do, but having Rafael by her side.
“Yes, I do!” she consented.
When leaving the chapel, some of the guests threw rice grains on the newlyweds and wished them happiness. Atílio greeted some of his friends, while Lorena hugged Mercedes who, by the way, was extremely thrilled.
“Lorena, you have no idea how happy I am for you! I wish you all the happiness!”
“Thank you, my friend!”
Her parents, especially Mr. Gaspar, were also taken by emotion.
“Dad, please, don't cry like that!” Lorena hugged him.
“I’m the one who I thought would suffer more than him...” Mrs. Teodora commented. “In fact, I already told him that you are not leaving and that we will be able to see you often.”
“My daughter, you can always count on me for anything you may need! Always! Your mother and I love you very much”, Mr. Gaspar declared, taken by emotion.
“And me? Can’t I wish happiness to one of my great friends?” a familiar voice asked.
The bride recognized who was speaking. It was Carolina.
“I’m still upset with you! Don't you think that we deserved a little more consideration? You should have let us know about this marriage!”
“Carolina, again with this story? I already explained myself to you!” Lorena answered.
“That’s ok, then! It is water under the bridge. Now, let me hug you!”
While she felt Carolina’s arm around her, she saw that Rafael was approaching.
“All the happiness to you, Your Grace!”
“Why are you calling me that, Rafael?” Lorena asked suspiciously.
“Because this is the conventional title, Mrs. Countess.”
“But I waive friends of such formalities.”
“Rafael likes to joke, Lorena”, Carolina said, hugging him.
“So I’ve noticed”, agreed the bride, glaring at him.
“Lorena, come!” Atílio called her. “It is time for us to go.”
“Goodbye, my friends!” She hugged them again.
“This time, let us know of your return!” Carolina said, smiling.
And it was in that sumptuous colonial construction with baroque style that Lorena Duarte Valão quit being simply another one of the many eligible ladies of the Court. She had married Mr. Atílio da Veiga Santiago, one of the most coveted men in all of Rio de Janeiro. The dream of so many years now had become a reality. A title of nobility was now given her because of her wedlock with a son of the nobility. And may she honor the good name of the family she was now a part of with her own life. Now, she was Mrs. Lorena Duarte Valão Santiago, the Countess of Assis!
Chapter XIX
An old lady was running hurriedly, leaving the room. Her face seemed to be constrained by the scene she had just witnessed, and she carried rags stained with blood gathered in an old bowl. While she went down the stairs, she couldn't forget what she had seen. How could someone go through something like that? Mrs. Lorena, Mr. Atílio’s wife, had been suffering a lot since the last hours, and that little girl didn’t deserve to go through that! She was a young lady from a good family, and didn't even look like she had completed twenty years old. Poor thing!
A little more than a week prior, Lorena had started to feel weak and without energy even to get up from the bed. She was already in the last month of her pregnancy and felt like the birth of her child was fast approaching. It had been a while since she had been away, living in one of the properties that belonged to the Santiago family, which Atílio thought to be wise, so that no suspicion could be made about the birth of the child. All it would take an acquaintance would be to do the math and his wife’s reputation would be compromised. It was a farm next to the city of Campos dos Goytacazes, which Lorena didn’t even had the energy to get to know, due to the many cares her pregnancy required.
Finally, mid-June, Lorena started to feel the first birth contractions. It was a stabbing, sharp pain. She screamed and agonized with much fear, and not even Atílio, with all his patience, could calm her down, so he preferred to take care of his wife’s delivery himself. He called in Mrs. Diná, the old midwife, well known in the region, to help him out.
Meanwhile, in the house kitchen, Leontina, a very old black and simple woman who took care of the house chores had the consideration of doing the sign of the cross when hearing the young lady screaming again. Teobaldo, one of the chubby slave’s sons, laughed
when he saw his mother blessing herself.
“Why are you doing the sign of the cross, my mother?”
“God have mercy! I’m the one who didn't want to be in her place, poor girl! I had all of yous in easy deliveries, thank God!” the slave said, lifting her hands towards heaven.
“What I have is pity of us, all slaves of these white people!” the lad spoke, revolted. “Her children will boss us all around, and our children too.”
“Don’t be ungrateful, Teobaldo! Mr. Atílio has never let us suffering in the coffee farms. He is good as his father was, may God rest his soul! Now, that old Mrs. Veridiana, I am not sure! That one has a deal with the devil!” and saying that, she made the sign of the cross again.
Another scream was heard coming from the bedroom.
“Jesus Christ!” Leontina exclaimed. “God bless the Miss with a good delivery!”
Atílio was in the room, supporting his wife, while she was getting weaker by the minute, with all the fatigue and pain: her legs opened, her body soaked with sweat due to her efforts to push the fetus out of her body, and the bed, with big blood stains, produced a strong and nauseating odor: all that represented the life cycle that was starting again.
“Atílio, I want my mother! I cannot take this pain any longer!” Lorena sobbed.
“Calm down, sweetheart! It will not take much longer. Push a little more. Come on!”
One last scream and behold the new baby was born. It was a boy. However, there not no crying, just silence.
“Lorena didn’t even have time to know about this news, for she had fainted from the pain. Atílio took the baby in his arms, all shrunken and without any vital signs... it was a stillbirth. Better this way! Atílio thought, with coldness. How would his future be, seeing a child who didn't belong to him grow? Life couldn’t be more generous! He had done his part, taking care of his wife and delivery, but nature hadn’t allowed that the little one survived, what to do? Thinking about it, he displayed a half smile.
“Good grief, Dr. Atílio! Why are you smiling?” Mrs. Diná asked, shocked. “Poor little angel! He didn’t see the light of day... And his mother, poor thing, how is she going to react to this?”
“I’m the one who got lucky in all of this!” he answered quietly, not taking his eyes away from the dead child.
“Holy Mary!” the old lady said, doing the sign of the cross herself. “How can you talk like that, when your child was born dead!?”
“It’s not my child, do you understand? IT IS NOT MY CHILD!” he screamed, uncontrolled.
“But Dr. Atílio...”
Lorena’s husband simply remembered all the humiliation he had suffered those past months, seeing his wife’s stomach bulge with a child that was not his, and the long weeks that he had to sleep in a separate room, when all he wanted was to feel her, sleeping next to him. How many times he had wanted to hate her for having giving herself to another man!
The worst had been to put up with the suspicions and complains of Mrs. Veridiana about Lorena’s pregnancy. As an experienced woman, the fast growth of his wife’s belly made his mother turn his life miserable!
• • •
“You must tell me what is really happening here, Atílio!”
“There is nothing to say, mother.”
“Do you think, by any chance, that I am an idiot? This woman’s stomach is not a belly of only a few months!”
“I already explained that Lorena’s pregnancy is facing complications. Don't you forget that I am a doctor?”
“What I cannot forget is that I have a stupid son who is capable of doing the worst foolishness because of a shameless woman!”
“I won’t accept you to talk like that about my wife!” Atílio said, exasperated.
“I’m in my house and I will say as I please! This child is not yours! Confess, Atílio, or deny it, if you can!”
He was quiet, seating at the edge of the bed.
“And you still insist that I have no reason to suspect. You’re lying to your own mother, in order to cover for this vulgar woman.”
“I don’t want to argue with you any more. And this is the reason why I don't want to continue this conversation” and, getting up from the edge of the bed, he turned his back to her and opened the bedroom door.
“Cuckold!”
What had he just heard?
“What did you say, mother?” He turned to her, baffled.
“You heard me well! That you are a cuckold, a wittol! If your father were alive, he would have said the same.”
Atílio clenched his fists. For the first time in his life, he thought about dishonoring his mother. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
“Alma! ALMA!” he shouted.
His sister came running, for she had never seen Atílio raising his voice, let alone screaming like that.
“What’s going on?” she asked worriedly.
“Put Lorena’s clothes in a suitcase, and I will do the same with mine. I won’t stay a minute longer in this house! Unless my mother apologizes to me and to my wife.”
“Don't waste your time! You know very well that I spoke the truth”, Mrs. Veridiana interrupted him dryly.
“The only truth I know, mother, is that you are making mine and Lorena’s life miserable! Don't you realize that I see it happening? Your insults, your sarcasm, your constant bad mood! There is no nice gesture that Lorena does that may not evoke an answer with splinters and poison. I want to emphasize to you beforehand that Lorena has never complained about your rudeness, never!”
Alma was trying to calm her furious brother down. He was visibly affected.
“Brother, please, reconsider it!”
“I cannot stand this anymore. I’m done!”
Then, Mrs. Veridiana left the room, while the other woman tried to convince him to stay.
“Please, Atílio! Don't leave me here alone with mother”, his sister was begging.
“You are the one who should also leave this house, taking your husband with you. He is not less of a victim than Lorena.”
“Try to understand that our mother would die if we left her alone. I know that she is harsh with everyone, but that’s her way to say that she loves us, Atílio!”
“You are a good soul!” he said, making a pun with his sister’s name.
“So, what do you say? Will you give another chance for our mother to apologize?”
“She is too prideful to apologize. Give Lorena and me sometime, and we will see how things work out. Mother may take back her words, even though I believe that’s impossible. She is too inflexible. What I just heard hurt me tremendously, you can’t even imagine!”
Alma hugged her brother. They had always been close together, and now this sudden detachment provoked by their mother’s unfounded suspicion had generated all this mess.
“Well, if I cannot change your mind, all I have to do is to support you. But do you already have an idea of where you two are going?”
“To our state in Campos dos Goytacazes. Lorena at least will be more tranquil enjoying the peace of the countryside.”
And on the next day, they left Laranjeiras.
• • •
Atílio came back to his senses again, and realized he was still in the bedroom, holding the dead child of an unknown father, whose name was, to him, completely ignored. Many times he had asked his wife about the name of the man who had gotten her pregnant, but the answer was an absolute silence.
He examined the tiny corpse extremely carefully, searching for features of Lorena and of the cursed man that had stolen her heart. After completing the task, he placed his eyes on the unconscious body of his wife, without knowing how she would react to that fatal news. However, that didn’t matter anymore, because now Lorena was exclusively his. It was the first time, in many years of profession, that Atílio became happy with someone’s death. Especially him who, at this graduation, had sworn the hypocrites’ oath[43]...
He was so pleased with the death of the little creature, that
he didn't mind singing to him a lullaby, as a thanksgiving act. Enthralled by the future he foresaw with his beloved, Atílio knew that once the child was buried, her happiness would come back, and he would finally be able to gain his wife’s heart. There would be no more stains from the past, but only the expectancy of complete happiness in the future. While he was absorbed in his thoughts, Atílio was still rocking the child back and forth in his eternal slumber singing an old melody, as if the little angel could hear him. What for Mrs. Diná, witnessing that morbid scene, represented an act of disorder and craziness, for Atílio, it represented his deliverance. His and Lorena’s.
The Count of Assis only interrupted his chilling lullaby when he heard the choked voice of his wife extending her arms to the child. She had gained consciousness and, although still weakened, she wanted to breastfeed him.
“Give me the child, Atílio!” the mother requested.
“No!” he said, retracting.
“And why not?”
“Because it will be too strenuous for you”, he answered, with a heavy voice. How could he tell her the truth? He thought.
“I want my child, Atílio!” she insisted. “Give him to me now!”
Atílio gave her the corpse. The little body was already cold, pale and hardened. Lorena thought that was strange, for the child wasn’t moving or showing any reaction. Her husband simply informed her with coldness:
“I did what I could, but he was born dead.”
When she heard the news, the mother couldn’t believe it. She looked astonished to the boy and to Atílio, seeking an explanation; and, when she realized what really had happened in those few seconds, she dropped the child on the bed, with an expression of horror on her face, running like crazy through the bedroom, crying, sobbing, and screaming:
The Countess Of Assis - Romance, revenge and ambition during the Second Reign Page 14