I introduced Troy to Amy. This was the first time he met her. He was quite impressed. He too knew she was way out of my league. He kept complimenting her to the point I think he had a hard on. Who knew he was so flirtatious with the girls when Sharon wasn't around. I asked him if Mary called again, not to mention her. He promised.
The rest of the year, my relationship with Amy remained mostly physical, or so I thought. When you lose your parents forever and your first love, you lose your ability to emotionally attach with people. This was the case with Amy. I liked her, I just didn't love her. She, on the other hand, had fallen head over heels for me. What complicated the relationship, was the fact Matt and Carly were going hot and heavy. Most of the time, when Carly was around, Amy was around. I didn't always mind. She was extremely helpful throughout my rehab. The sex was great because I didn't have to do much. She was worried about hurting my knee, so she always insisted on being on top. Sometimes I felt guilty. She had become such a pro at it, easily satisfying me and herself. The blow jobs became more frequent too. She could have no doubt won a blow job contest if there was such a thing.
I remember this one night in particular when she told me she loved me. Unfortunately, I couldn't reciprocate the feeling. It was a rough moment. She asked if I loved her and I shook my head no. I told her I wanted to, but I just wasn't there yet. Mary was the only girl who I ever said those words to, besides my mom. I didn't mention Mary in my response, but explained how the loss of my parents had affected me. She said she understood. I think she was just saying that though. I’m sure when you get the nerve to tell someone you love them, and they don’t reply the same thing back, it can be horrific. She pretended to be cool with it. She even invited me to spend a couple days of Christmas break at her parent’s. She said they were dying to meet me. Thankfully, I had an out since Troy and Sharon were coming down to spend Christmas with me. Once again, Troy had come through for me. I knew meeting her parents would only intensify her feelings towards me. My best bet was to avoid it at all cost.
You can only avoid meeting your “girlfriend’s” parents for so long. I had completed a crazy amount of rehab and was ready to play the first week in May. Coach had relegated me as the designated hitter for the remainder of the year. It was fine with me, just as long as I played. I knew my knee wasn't completely healed, even though I passed all of the tests necessary for me to resume all normal activity. It hurt like hell during the test. I was able to hide the pain. The fear of not playing the rest of the year had my adrenaline pumping. I tried to hide it during practice. Coach knew something was amiss though. I had a noticeable limp when I ran. I told him I was just getting used to my old running form and felt no pain. He warned me not to screw up my future by coming back too early. I shrugged it off.
Her parents came up to watch my first game played in over six months. It would have been nice to meet them before the game. My nerves were intense with the eager anticipation. I had a good game for my first game back. I went two for four with two singles. I swung the bat well and made solid contact. The second game was more of the same. I went two for three and stretched a single into a double. It was a stupid move on my part. The pain I felt in my knee was difficult to hide. Coach took me out of the game once I scored. We ended up winning both games.
I met her parents after the game and they were both super nice. Very down to earth for such high class people. I could tell Amy was nervous. She had confided in me she had never had a boyfriend serious enough to introduce to her parents. I had been feeling guilty with the fact we were on such different playing fields with our emotions. Truth is, I should have ended it with her a long time ago. I was selfish and felt like I was using her to help me avoid thinking of Mary.
Today was different though. I guess her vulnerability in showing her nervousness with me meeting her parents made me see her in a new light. After her parents had left and it was just us two, I felt different. I started to get that queasiness in my stomach. That feeling of being with someone for the first time. We had been together for almost a year, but it suddenly felt brand new to me. I was actually starting to fall for her. The only thing left for me to do was let my feelings go. To let myself feel love again. I had to let what Mary and I had go. I was finally feeling ready to move on.
I told her I loved her that night. She cried and asked me over and over again if I really did. She was so happy, refusing to let go of me the entire night. She was clingy. Not in a bad way though. I felt happy for her. She was an awesome person and the three simple words I told her made her more alive. I felt happy for me.
My heart felt whole. I was in love again.
Chapter 39
I finished my sophomore season strong. Compiling a .402 batting average and ten home runs. My knee held up for the most part. The same couldn't be said for the summer league.
I was invited to play in the upper echelon league that year. I was able to play the field and the coach was instructed to only play me at third. It was a new position for me. I had been a shortstop since I first played pee wee baseball. I did well. I fielded everything that was hit to me, but struggled to make any play that required me to make a quick adjustment. I lost some arm speed too. Most of my throws were from my back foot since I was unable to plant firmly on my left while making the throw. The summer season was winding down and after my last game, I knew there was something wrong with my knee. I went in for a routine checkup and found I had once again tore my ACL. I was devastated to say the least. Coach was shutting me down for the fall and more intensive physical rehab ensued. The doctors agreed I should be ready for the start of the season if everything went right.
I was the only one at fault for this injury. I shouldn't have lied about the pain I felt when they completed my final test. I was so hell bent on getting back to the field, I compromised any future of playing professionally. The good news was that it wasn't the MCL too.
It was hard watching my teammates practice and play games. I took more of a coaching role during the fall. I was pretty good at it, especially with the younger players. Coach even joked about me hanging up the cleats and getting serious about coaching. This wasn't going to happen, but at least I had a fall back plan.
I spoke with my college advisor about becoming a coach. It was also time for me to pick a major. She said if I wanted to be a coach, then I should consider a major in education, possibly physical education. I thought about it, and it’s exactly what I did. Most of the coaches in my high school were PE teachers, so I figured this to be the best route.
The good thing about being an education major, was that Amy shared the same major. She wanted to be a kindergarten teacher due to her love for kids. She had been volunteering at a local daycare center since her freshman year and was great with them.
I remember going to the center to pick her up one day and they were outside with all the kids. I sat in my car watching as she played with them. She was so alive and looked like she was born to work with kids. She was so beautiful. Her long curly blonde hair bouncing around every time she chased after a kid. The relationship was definitely more than just physical. I had never thought about having kids of my own anytime soon. That day I could picture us as parents. The thought excited me a little bit. All of my siblings had kids and I loved each and every one of them. I was certain I would make a good parent too. I guess I was just a little emotional over the prospect of not playing pro ball. The thought of settling down with Amy someday made me comfortable.
As the first semester of my junior year dragged on, I spent every available opportunity with Amy. It was nice having your girlfriend go to a party with you and not have to worry about her freaking out. We were fully committed. I trusted her and she trusted me. I mentioned earlier how much out of my league she was. It was a common occurrence at any of these parties she would get hit on. I should have been jealous, but I never was. I knew who she was going home with. The seriousness and trustworthiness we had in each other was comforting. If we were back in my hometown, it mig
ht be a different story. Since most of the people down here had that southern drawl, it wasn't foreign to most of the people. I knew the guys back home would have been drooling over this southern bell. Hell, Troy did every time he met her. I was a lucky man.
Last Christmas, I avoided going home with Amy. This year was different. We were much more serious now, and Matt and Carly would be there too. Amy always talked about how magical Christmas was at her house. Every year, her dad would have professionals come and light up the house like a winter wonderland. She said sometimes, when the temperature was expected to be colder, her dad would hire someone to cover the yard with snow from a snow machine. The extended forecast was predicting below average temperatures this year and her dad was all giddy to do it this year. I thought it was a little of an overkill. Who was I to judge though? Amy held her dad in high regards and everything he did, he did for them.
Troy and his family usually came down to visit over Christmas. I told him my plans and he was a little disappointed. He joked around about me and Amy’s relationship getting serious. It was all in good fun. He said he would plan on coming down the first of January so he could make sure I had my shit together.
This would be my first time spending Christmas without any of my family around.
Chapter 40
I agreed to go back with Amy over Christmas for an entire week. We arrived at her house on the twentieth of December, and she was again a nervous wreck. I would be the first guy to ever stay at her house over the holidays. I tried to get her to relax. She was so concerned about me feeling comfortable and wanting me to like her family.
I drove her car because she was shaking like a leaf. Matt and Carly were already at Carly’s parents’ house as he planned on staying the entire break there. Amy’s nervousness was so uncanny. It made me feel appreciated she was like this. I tried to calm her down.
“You need to chill out Amy. Why are you so nervous?”
She shook her head and stared off in the distance, “I don’t know Darrel. I told you, I have never had anyone stay with me at my parents’ over the holidays. I just want you to like them.”
I placed my hand on her knee, “I've already met them, and I thought they were great. Relax. By the way, I find it hard to believe you never had a serious boyfriend. What gives?”
She grabbed my hand and held onto it tight, “I’m so much a little daddy’s girl. He always kept me so busy during high school, I didn't have time to date. Don’t laugh, but the first time I ever had a beer was at the party we met at.”
I laughed out loud, “Are you serious! Why didn't you tell me that? God, now I feel guilty we slept together that first night.”
She hit me on the leg, “Stop it Darrel. It’s not like I was drunk or anything. There was just something about you.”
“Oh do tell,” I teased.
“No, you will just think I’m stupid.”
“Come on Amy! I've always wondered what you saw in me. I mean, look at you. You’re drop dead gorgeous and I’m just a dumb ball player who doesn't know my head from a hole in the wall.”
She scrunched her nose, “I’m not telling.”
I grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze, “Well, I’m glad you stuck with me even though I might have been emotionally distant at times. I love you.”
She returned a squeeze to my hand and placed her other one on top as she looked at me and smiled, “I love you too Darrel.”
I didn't pry anymore. She would tell me in time. She was more relaxed now and it continued as we pulled into her drive. She wasn't kidding when she said her dad did it up for Christmas. My God was it spectacular! It was close to dusk, so the lights and all the animation was in full display. There was a row of trees that blanketed the drive leading up to the house. Each tree was wrapped in bright white lights and the sound of Christmas tunes could be heard. I was at a loss for words with how beautiful it was. As we approached the house, there were a slew of cars wrapped a block long around the circle drive that covered the entirety of the front of the house. The house was lit up with different colored lights. There were animated Santa’s, reindeer, snowmen and elves galore. Off in the distance, you could see the snow machine. We were going to have a white Christmas for sure.
Amy’s nerves started to pick up once we unloaded our bags from the trunk. It didn't help that her parents decided to have some sort of party before we arrived. Amy told me she had no idea what was going on. We made our way to the door as she took a deep breath before opening it. We walked into a sea of people dressed in holiday attire.
Amy wasn't the only one nervous now as these strange people quickly approached us. Her parents made their way to us first and greeted Amy with a big hug. I was next. They were definitely a huggy feely type family. I had only met her parents once before. Their affection definitely put my nerves at ease. I could still tell she was nervous though.
Amy proceeded to introduce me to everyone who was there. There were aunts, uncles, grandparents and family friends. Her two brothers were the last to greet me. They were twins and were sophomores in high school. Amy rarely talked about them. I could tell why. They seemed like a couple of smug pricks. Far from the sweet southern girl Amy was. They gave me a shake of the hand and nod of the head before running off to do whatever they did.
The rest of the night was spent conversing with the many guests. Amy never left my side. I was so thankful for this. I was not one who liked being stuck with a bunch of people I didn’t know.
By the end of the night, I felt like one of the family. Amy and I spent a good two hours sitting with her parents in front of the fireplace talking. They wanted to know all about me. I tried to give them what they needed. When the conversation came to my parents, I started to break down a bit. The previous two Christmases were the most difficult since my parents passed. It was always made easier when Troy was with me. I didn't have any family with me this year, so it made it that much more difficult to survive. I had to excuse myself for a bit to go compose myself. When I returned, I took a seat next to Amy again. I knew my eyes were red from crying as I hid in the bathroom for a few minutes. Her mom came over and sat down next to me.
“You look like you need a hug Darrel,” she said in her sweet southern voice. “Can I give you a hug?”
I nodded my head and she hugged me. She hugged me tight, just like my mom used to. I returned the embrace and tried to hold back the tears. I couldn't. It had been almost two and a half years since my mom passed and there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think about her. Having another mother hug me this way brought on the flood of emotions. She pulled away from me and wiped my tears with her fingers while looking me in the eye.
“Darrel,” she smiled. “I’m so sorry for your losses. I want you to know, from this day forward, if you ever want to talk or just need a hug, you let me know.”
“Thank you Mrs. Middleton,” I replied. “I might end up taking you up on that offer.”
She laughed, “Mrs. Middleton is my mother-in-law, Darrel. By all means, call me Beth.” She stood up and placed her hand on my cheek staring at me. “Now Amy, you didn’t tell me he had these beautiful blue eyes. My Lord, they’re as clear blue as the sky.”
“Mom,” Amy responded with embarrassment.
Her dad got up and gave me a pat on the shoulder and kissed Amy goodnight, “Am I correct in assuming you two will be sharing the same bed?”
I gave Amy a questioning look as she responded, “If that’s alright.”
He nodded his head, “Just be respectful Amy.”
Did I hear this right? They were going to let us share the same bed the first night we were here. This just made this trip a whole lot better in my mind. Her parents were awesome! This would turn out to be a Christmas to remember.
Chapter 41
Amy failed to mention everyone has to be out of bed by 6:00 AM every morning. Apparently, even if your parents are filthy rich you are still required to do chores. My parents weren't rich and I never had chores growing up. I
would be damned if I was doing them now, but I did.
Amy said I could have stayed in bed. I’m sure that would have went over real well with her dad. One would also think the only girl in the house would get off having the easy chores. Wrong again. Amy was responsible for feeding the horses when she was home. I knew she had horses, just not a whole stable full of horses. It was crazy. She said their house sat on fifty acres of land and most of it was fenced in. The horses had the run of the place during the day.
Having never dealt with horses before in my life, Amy had quite an amusing time watching me. She failed to remind me horses have teeth and they were not afraid to use them. I don’t know exactly why I put myself in such a vulnerable situation. She said she told me to avoid the horse name Jaws. Unfortunately, I did not hear her say that. I walked by his stall and noticed my boot was untied. I stopped in front of his opening and bent down to tie it. Jaws took this as an opportunity to remind me horses bite and clamped down on my back with a mouthful of teeth. I yelled bloody murder as he held on for only a few seconds before releasing me as I fell to the ground trying to comfort my aching back. Amy rushed over laughing hysterically before bending down to check my wound. Jaws didn't draw blood, but it hurt like a mother fucker. The only way to describe the feeling was, it felt like getting bit by a fucking thousand pound horse. There is no pain to compare it to.
My Blue Eyes Page 16