My Blue Eyes

by Maxim Daniels

  “She is so beautiful Mary,” I said smiling.

  Mary beamed with pride, “Yes, she is. She has a little bit of both of us in her. You should see her throw a ball.”

  “Please tell me she doesn't throw like you Mary.”

  Mary proceeded to slap me on the arm laughing, “Hey now. You've never seen me throw a ball.”

  “I kid Mary!” I focused in on Ellie. “Tell me what part of me you see in her.”

  Mary sat back on the bench and crossed her legs, getting ready to reminisce. “First thing, is your eyes. I’m sure you noticed them. When she was first born, they looked green, and I was so disappointed. I wanted her so badly to have your eyes. After a couple weeks, they turned blue. I was so happy! She has your lips and your smile. Every time she gives me a little grin, I see you. Thankfully she has your personality too. She is so sweet and always wants to help out. Actually Darrel, she has more of your traits than mine. The way she watches me sometimes, I swear she gives me the same look you used to give me. You know…that look you have where you can just tell someone how much you love them by looking at them.”

  Mary paused and looked at me, “I miss that look Darrel. The first time I saw it was when we were at the creek that first time. I was soaking in the rain and you were just staring at me. I fell in love with you then. What I wouldn't give to feel that way again.”

  I responded with an uncomfortable laugh, “I remember that time. Man it feels like it was so long ago.”

  “It wasn't that long ago Darrel. Do you think if you weren't with Amy, we could be together again?”

  I took a deep breath, “Don’t do this Mary.”

  “Don’t do what?”

  “Please don’t go down that road. I’m with Amy.” I turned my head slightly towards her, “I am so deeply in love with her.”

  Mary responded by rolling her eyes, “I know you are. How could you not be? She’s drop dead gorgeous and sweet as can be. She’s lucky to have you. I just wish things would have been different.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Mary slightly shook her head, “If I would have been able to get the same therapy here that I did in Minnesota, everything would have been different. It would have all been different.”

  “Well, the good thing is you’re better now.” I placed my arm around her and gave her a slight hug.

  I should have known better than to do that. Mary took this as an invitation to sit back into my arms. Just like she did when we were together. It made me a little uncomfortable, but we stayed like this while watching Ellie play with her new friend.

  “I miss this too Darrel. Your big arms wrapped around me. I always felt safe in them.”

  “Yep,” I said. “We were so in love back then.”

  Mary sat up and looked me in the eyes, “I've never stopped loving you.”

  I sat up straight. This was starting to get out of hand. Mary put her hand on the side of my face and I worried she was going to try to kiss me. She didn't though. She got up and went over to Ellie. She said something to her and picked her up. She sat down on the park bench and held Ellie on her lap.

  “Ellie,” Mary said quietly looking at her. “This is your daddy.”

  Ellie smiled and looked at me, “Daddy?”

  I don’t even know if she knew exactly what this all meant. I didn't care. Hearing Ellie say Daddy made my heart melt. I grabbed her from Mary and held her close, resting my lips on the top of her head.

  “What do you think about that Ellie,” I asked.

  She looked at me again and smiled, “Daddy!”

  She stood up on the bench a hugged me around the neck. It was a moment I will never forget. Maybe, just maybe, she understood the emotion of finding out I was her dad.

  Coach Bradley’s party finally started. It was good seeing him and most of our team from my senior season. I introduced Amy to everyone. They were all very impressed. Amy stayed close to me, displaying the same proudness I felt being with her.

  Matt and Carly were there too. They were both in a good mood. They informed Amy and me they were getting married at the end of October. Matt tried to convince me that Amy and I should get married at the same time. Have some type of double wedding thing. I wasn't too big on it, but noticed Amy gave it some thought. I easily convinced her it wasn't a good idea, because I wanted our wedding to be all about her and me. I told her she deserved to have the day to be all about her.

  After all the introductions, we took to our assigned seating arrangements. This turned out to be more of a formal party than I expected. Coach got up at the mic to accept his gift the school had purchased for him. He gave a nice speech that included more than a couple mentions of me.

  He turned his attention towards me and spoke from the heart. He talked about how much of a pleasure it was coaching me. He talked about how devastated he was when he found out I hurt my knee the first time. And then even more devastation with every knee injury that pursued. He went on to mention the recent job I accepted coaching the varsity team in Andalusia. He then went on to shock me with his next statement.

  “Darrel, I know this is a long shot, but remember, I am the athletic director now. My first duty is finding a new head coach. If for some reason, you get the itch to return here with your beautiful fiancé, the head coach job is yours. I couldn't think of anyone better for the job. I just want to give you something to think about.”

  I laughed out loud. It was an honor to have him want me to be the next coach. I looked at Amy and she had a worried look to her. I quickly reassured her I wanted to live in Andalusia.

  The party turned out to be a very good time. Matt and Carly came back to the house for a night cap. I still hadn't told them about Ellie. When I did, they were both completely at a loss for words.

  Matt spent the next hour trying to get me alone. I knew he was worried about me. He was finally able to when Carly and Amy left to get more alcohol.

  “Please tell me you are not even remotely thinking about moving back here,” he said.

  “Relax buddy. My home’s in Alabama,” I said trying to reassure him.

  I could tell he was still worried sick, “Seriously Matt. We are leaving in three days to go back home.”

  “You say that now Darrel, but you have a kid. I know you. I've known you my whole life. You are not one to avoid an obligation. Promise me right now you are not moving back here.”

  “I’m not Matt. I promise.”

  Matt was still not convinced. “It’s just that I know how hung up on Mary you were. Even when you started dating Amy, I knew you were still into Mary. Are you still into Mary?”

  “Not at all,” I tried to respond convincingly. “That was then and this is now. You have no idea how much I love Amy. Seriously, would I propose to someone if I wasn't one hundred percent certain I wanted to be with her?”

  Matt let out a frustrated sigh, “I’m freaking out Darrel. Thank God Amy is here. What would you do if Mary tried to convince you to be with her? She has the upper hand. She has your kid.”

  I threw my hand up in the air, “Seriously Matt! It’s not going to happen. Yes, we have a child together. Yes, I am going to miss Ellie like crazy. Yes, I am going to want to be with her every day. But I can’t! Hopefully, Mary and I can work out some sort of arrangement to where I get to see her as much as possible. Is it going to be hard not seeing her every day? You’re damn right it’s going to be hard.”

  Matt shook his head, “I promise, I will hunt you down and kill you if you don’t stick to your word.”

  I laughed, “I’m really not happy with Mary. I’m pissed she kept Ellie from me for all these years. It is what it is though. I will make it work out.” I looked at Matt with all seriousness, “Brother, you need to understand, I love Amy and never want to be without her.”

  We both stood up and hugged it out, “I believe you Darrel. Oh, and congratulations on the kid.”

  We both laughed and proceeded to talk about the unexpectedness of me being a father. Matt jokin
gly called me Dad every chance he got. It wasn't going to get old being referred to as a Dad.

  The ladies finally made it back with the liquor and we proceeded to get stupid drunk. Matt and I reminisced about all the things we used to do in our home town. Amy and Carly just took it all in, surely storing everything we said to hold against us at a later time.

  As the night wore on, the alcohol finally took its toll on us. I made Matt and Carly stay the night. Thankfully, there was still an extra bed available in one of the bedrooms.

  I was finishing up my nightly routine in the bathroom when Amy walked in with such a look of passion in her eyes. I had never seen this look before. She stepped between me and the sink counter and wrapped her arms around my neck, staring at me without saying a word. I noticed she had dug out one of my old shirts from my drawers and was using it as nightgown. She scooted herself onto the counter and spread her legs, revealing she was wearing no panties. This was so unlike her, I thought. She was pretty straight and forward with sex. Never wanting to do it anywhere with a bit of risqué involved. Even though the bathroom sink wasn't all that risqué, it was for Amy. She slid the shirt off of her, revealing her beautiful breasts. She grabbed my shirt from the bottom and slowly pulled it off over my head. I dropped my boxers and proceeded to enter her. We made love there until it started to get too loud. I picked her up, still inside her, and carried her into the bedroom. She didn't want to do it on the bed, so we finished standing up. I rested her back against the wall as I continued to slide in her. She moaned like never before and when she finally reached her plateau, she bit down on my shoulder letting out a muffled scream. This caused me to climax simultaneously as we both enjoyed the ecstasy of going at the same time. I don’t know what got into Amy, but I can honestly say it was the best sex I have ever had.

  Chapter 49

  I woke up early the next morning and Amy was lying there, just staring at me. When I looked at her she smiled and kissed me softly on the lips. There was a difference to her this morning. She seemed so happy and content. Maybe the deviation from our normal sexual position brought a renewed desire to her. Whatever it was, I liked it. She whispered, "I love you," and we spent most of the morning having sex, after sex, after sex. We did it so much I think we were both rubbed raw. This was confirmed later in the day when she told me it was hurting her to walk. I didn't know if I should feel proud or concerned.

  Mary had left a message asking if Amy and I wanted to spend the day with Ellie. She had some things she wanted to do after finding out early Sunday morning she got the job at St. Elizabeth’s. I jumped at the chance and called Mary back. She agreed to drop her off at noon.

  I was super stoked about getting to spend the day with her, free of worry from Mary trying to reminisce about when we were together. Amy, being the kid lover she is, decided to plan out the entire day. It was nice, because I had no idea what to do for our little get together.

  Mary dropped her off at noon, right on the dot. Since there was really nothing to do in my hometown, Amy suggested we take a two hour trip to St. Louis and visit the zoo. I was worried Mary wouldn't like the idea, but was pleasantly surprised when she said it was okay. I told her I hoped we would be home by 9:00 PM and I would call her when we got home.

  Mary left her diaper bag with a supply of pull ups and wipes. She said she was starting to potty train Ellie, and she had been doing well, so hopefully I wouldn't need to use them. Mary surprisingly didn't seem nervous with the idea of being apart from Ellie. I guess she just trusted me.

  We arrived at the zoo around 3:30 PM and the car ride down was great. Amy led us all in song the majority of the way down. Unfortunately, Ellie favored Amy over me and spent most of the other time talking to her. I don’t know what I would do without her.

  Neither one of us thought about bringing a stroller. Big mistake. The zoo did have ones you could rent, but this was my daughter, and I didn't want her using some rented stroller. Big mistake.

  After an hour of trying to walk with a three year old, carrying a three year old and carrying her on my shoulders, I was exhausted. Amy was having a hard time walking due to our rendezvous under the sheets this morning. We managed to see all the animals after about four hours and two hundred dollars later. The St. Louis Zoo is supposed to be free, but like a new Dad, I bought Ellie anything she asked for.

  This was quite possibly one of the most enjoyable days I have ever had. I connected more with Ellie and surprisingly connected even more with Amy. Just when you think you can’t love anyone any more, something just happens. I would compare it to one of those “Test Your Strength” games you see at the carnival. You know, the one where you hit it with a big hammer hoping to ring the bell. Well, my love for her was already ringing the bell. After last night and today, I shot the bell completely off somewhere into the stratosphere. I knew she felt exactly the same too. I could tell by her look, her smile, her touch and her everything. Ellie could tell it too. You could tell she was enjoying spending the day with two people so much in love.

  We got back home a little later than expected. Mary was waiting at my parent’s house when we got home. I was expecting her to be upset, but she wasn’t. Ellie slept most of the way home and was still asleep when we pulled in the driveway. Mary came walking over to the car.

  “Did you guys have a good time?” she asked.

  “It was awesome Mary,” I responded. “I think she is more than worn out. She is so beautiful just sleeping there.”

  Mary went to get her out of the car seat and paused, “You know, I don’t want to mess with waking her up, getting the car seat out, putting it back in my car and then making her get back in the car seat, only to have her fall asleep again. Would you like to keep her for the night?”

  “Really!” I replied in shock. “I would love to, but where would she sleep?”

  Mary laughed, “I know this awful, but she sleeps with me every night. Just let her sleep between you and Amy.”

  Amy looked at me and gave me an ‘I don’t care’ shoulder shrug and facial expression.

  “That would be great Mary,” I said.

  Mary said she had a pair of pajamas tucked at the bottom of the bag in case I asked to keep her for the night. She had planned all along for it. I unbuckled Ellie and picked her up. She didn't wake up, but instead wrapped her arms around my neck as I carried her inside. I was in heaven. I remembered when my dad used to say his favorite thing about being a parent was when he would have to carry us to bed. He said that moment when your child places their arms around your neck is something he wishes he could feel for the rest of his life. If he was in heaven looking down, he would be smiling now.

  We got inside, and Amy and I were ready for bed as well. Amy changed Ellie’s pull up and put her pajamas on while Ellie continued to sleep. I was a little uncomfortable having her laying between us. I was fearful I would roll over on her or something, so I stuck an extra pillow between Ellie and me. I gave her a kiss on the forehead and leaned over to give Amy one too. As tired as we were, we spent the next two hours whispering in conversation.

  “I love this Darrel,” Amy whispered.

  “Love what.”

  “This. Both of us lying here with a child between us.” Amy started to laugh, “Although, when we have our own kids together they will not sleep in our bed. How many kids do you want Darrel?”

  “I don’t know. I guess I've never really thought about it. I already have one, so maybe three more will do.”

  Amy wanted to laugh loud, but concealed it to a light chuckle, “I was thinking more on the lines of two more. I hope we have all boys. I like boys, but I think I love this little girl.”

  “Three boys would be nice,” I chuckled.

  “Two Darrel. Two.”

  “I guess I will just have to hope for twins after our first one then.”

  If I didn't know any better, I would have thought Amy was in a hurry to get our family started. My plan all along was to wait a couple years after getting married so we
could be comfortable financially with our jobs. I knew I was going to have to spend the next school year working my baseball team into shape, which would mean plenty of late evenings. Finding out about Ellie would put a detour into some of my plans. It was a good detour.

  Mary and I still hadn't worked out how I would get to spend time with her. I would sure enough find out the following day.

  Chapter 50

  I had the best sleep of my life last night. Yes it sucked waking up every thirty minutes worried I had rolled over on Ellie, but it was nice having her there. Every time I woke up, I made sure I leaned over and gave her a kiss on the head.

  We woke up bright and early and Ellie was in such a good mood. We laid in bed for almost two hours snuggled up, laughing and talking. We were finally forced to get out of bed when the doorbell rang. I went to get the door and Mary was standing outside.

  “Did I wake you up?” she laughed.

  “No, we were awake. We were just lying in bed talking.”

  “Isn’t she great in the morning?” Mary smiled. “Listen Darrel, can I come inside and talk to you for a second?”