by Erin Coyne
ti nye ZNA-yesh gdye MOZN-no po-smo-TRYET kho-RO-shii breik-dens?
?
I’m a big fan of Tsoi.
ya bol-ZHOI po-KLO-nnik TSO-ya.
.
That pop star always gives autographs to his fans.
E-ta pop-zvyez-DA vsyeg-DA da-YOT svo-IM fa-NAT-kam av-TO-gra-fi.
.
I’m a total music freak!
ya vo-ob-SCHE mye-lo-MAN!
!
Prerecorded music (for singers to essentially
perform karaoke style on stage)
mi-nu-SOV-ka
Recorded song (used for pop stars to lip-synch on
stage)
fa-NYE-ra
Guitar amp
pri-MOCH-ka
Rehearsal (slang)
RYE-pa
This is short for
(rye-pye-TI-tsi-ya)
The Legends of Leningrad
lye-GYEN-di lye-nin-GRA-da
The rock scene in Russia real y took off in the late ’70s/early ’80s just before and during the glasnost era. Before that, there was only the “official”
Soviet music scene, which was pretty awful, and a local underground that mainly comprised the aforementioned bards like Vysotsky and Okudzhava. There were the be-boppin’
( stilyagi) in the ’50s and various counterculture movements throughout the ’60s and ’70s, but they
were listening mainly to Western records smuggled into the country and sold on the black market. When homegrown Russian rock final y took off, it was in the Leningrad Rock Club, and those early years spawned the original Russian Monsters of Rock.
Akvarium
This band real y annoys the hel out of me. Some of their early stuff isn’t half bad, but ultimately their legendary lead singer
( Boris
Grebenschikov), often referred to simply as БГ ( BG), developed an obsessive interest in Buddhism and eastern mysticism and came to consider himself a deep intel ectual type. The result was less rock and more esoteric, artsy themes accompanied by melodies influenced by reggae, jazz, and folk music. Not surprisingly, it sucks. But, hey, if you’re an aging hippie who, despite fal ing victim to male-pattern baldness stil sports a ponytail, you might just get into these guys.
Alisa
Alisa used to rock hard, and they often performed their concerts clad in tight black denim and leather, black nail polish, and Kiss-like stage makeup. Unfortunately, they started getting old and flabby, and for a while turned to more jazz- and folk-inspired music. Their newer stuff is a little more hard rockin’ and isn’t real y that bad despite the blatant nationalist themes, but it’s just kind of depressing to watch punks get old. I feel the same sense of despair every time I see an interview with John Lydon.
Kino
The lead singer of Kino was
( Viktor Tsoi), whose angst-fil ed lyrics and untimely death in a car accident in 1990 has made him into a kind
of Russian Kurt Cobain. His cult status in Russia has led to creation of the Tsoi memorial wal just off Arbat in Moscow where you can almost always catch a few local stoners drinking port wine and leaving behind cigarettes as sacrificial offerings to their god, and apparently there are current plans to erect some sort of monument in his honor in St. Petersburg. In fact, Tsoi is stil so admired that in 2000 some of the hottest rock and pop artists in Russia released a rockin’ tribute album cal ed
(Kinoproby) on which they covered some of Kino’s greatest hits. In addition to
his music, Tsoi is also sometimes remembered for his starring role in the cult classic
( Igla), or The Needle. I have to admit that I have a soft
spot for him, but then I am prone to agonizing bouts of crippling depression.
DDT
Original y from the Uralic backwater of Ufa, DDT managed to skyrocket to international acclaim though hard work, gritty lyrics, and a whole lotta soul. Now, they may be considered total y old school by some, but I personal y think that
( Yuri Shevchuk) is stil one of the baddest
mofos around. He’s doing a lot of solo work these days, and most of his new stuff is both cynical and political without being clichéd. If you ask me, that just never goes out of style.
PC speak
PC sleng
PC
There’s a good reason that every Russian living in the U.S. seems to work as a computer programmer. Russians kick ass at this shit, and they are known to be some of the most skil ed hackers around. You know that last virus your computer caught? Likely it was created by some Russian teenager just goofing around after class. So why can’t they come up with their own words for PC speak?
My operating system fucking crashed again.
mo-YA o-pye-ra-TSON-ka o-PYAT piz-DOI na-KRI-las.
.
My computer is infected with a virus. moi kom-PYU-ter za-RA-zhen VI-ru-som.
.
I don’t know how
to use a Mac.
ya nye u-MYE-yu
YU-zat mak.
Мак.
From the English verb
“to use.”
I’ll photocopy it for you.
ya te-BYE ot-KSYER-yu.
.
From the brand name Xerox.
I’ll scan it for you.
ya te-BYE ot-ska-NI-ru-yu.
.
From the English verb “to scan.”
You can fax it to him.
Mo-zhesh ye-MU po-SLAT po FAK-su.
.
For some reason I can’t attach this file.
CHTO-to nye mo-GU pri-a-TTA-chat E-tot fail.
.
Both from English words: “attach” and “file.”
If you download the program, I can install it for you.
YES-li ska-CHA-yesh E-tu pro-GRA-mmu, ya po-mo-GU
te-BYE u-sta-no-VIT.
.
Also...
Cell (phone)
mo-BIL-ka
SMS
es-em-ES-ka
СМС-ка
To text
tyek-sto-VAT
The World Wide Web
myezh-du-na-ROD-na-ya syet
The Internet is becoming increasing popular in Russia, and there has been an explosion in Russian-language websites offering everything from explicit sites to satisfy your porn addiction to online term papers you can download and plagiarize, to pirated films where for a smal “membership fee” you can see the next Hol ywood blockbuster even before Hol ywood does, and al from the comfort of your lousy windowless cubicle. As with music, the vast majority of Internet terms are taken directly from English.
I met my fiancée online.
ya po-zna-KO-mil-sya so svo-YEI nye-VYES-toi v on-lAiN-ye.
.
I really liked her profile.
mnye O-chen po-NYA-vil-sya ye-YO PRO-fil.
.
I posted on a forum.
ya za-po-STIL-sya na FO-ru-mye.
.
We got to know each better in a chat room.
mi po-zna-KO-mi-lis po-BLI-zhe SI-dya v CHA-tye.
.
She sent me a PM.
o-NA na-pi-SA-la mnye v LICH-ku.
.
My posts were so stupid that the moderator
banned me.
o-I pos-TI BI-li na-STOL-ko du-TATS-ki-ye, chto mo-de-RA-tor me-NYA za-ba-NIL.
.
I flamed some idiot and got banned.
ya SDYE-lal ka-KO-mu-to i-di-O-tu fleim i po-lu-CHIL
ban.
.
Now the fucking site won’t accept my log-in and
password.
tye-PYER E-tot YO-ba-nnii sait nye pri-ni-MA-yet mo-YO
I-mya POL-zo-va-tye-lya i pa-ROL.
.
So later, we chatted on ICQ.
TAK chto, po-TOM mi ob-SCHA-lis v AS-kye.
.
We still haven’t met IRL.
mi ye-SCHO nye VSTRYE-ti-lis v re-A-lye.
.
She has
sent me some pics by e-mail.
o-NA mnye FOT-ki SKI-nula po MI-lu.
.
If NE1 doubts our love, they should see all the
emoticons we use.
YES-li kto-nit som-nye-VA-ye-tsya v NA-shei lyub-VI, o-NI
bi u-VI-dye-li ka-KI-ye mi is-POL-zu-yem SMAI-li-ki.
.
I just registered on odnoklassniki.ru
ya TOL-ko chto za-rye-gi-STRI-ro-val-sya na od-no-KLASS-ni-kakh TOCH-ka ru.
Odnoklassniki is one of the most popular Russian social networking sites
You can read all about it on my blog.
MOZH-no o-bo VSYOM pro-chi-TAT na mo-YOM
BLO-gye.
.
And not surprisingly, a blogger is cal ed a
(BLO-gger).
I spend a lot of time on the web.
ya MNO-go VRYE-mye-ni pro-vo-ZHU v sye-TI.
.
My username is...
moi nik...
...
I also have my own page on Live Journal.
u me-NYA TO-zhe yest svo-YA stra-NI-tsa na zhi-VOM
zhur-NA-lye.
.
The blogging site Live Journal is pretty popular in Russia and is
often referred to simply as
( ZhZh).
I’ll send you the link to my web page.
ya te-BYE po-SHLU SSIL-ku na mo-YU veb-stra-NI-tsu.
.
Do you have an e-mail address?
u te-BYA YEST A-dryes e-lyek-TRO-nnoi POCH-ti?
?
My e-mail is…
moi e-meil…
…
Note that the symbol @ used in e-mail addresses is pronounced as
( so-BACH-ka).
I am so sick of spam.
mnye tak na-do-YEL spam.
.
Netspeak
ya-ZIK pa-DON-kov
The Russian Internet has a language al its own, and it’s cal ed
( yazik padonkov), which literal y translates to something along the
lines of “scumbag language,” and this name, like most of the language itself, is sometimes spel ed in various creative ways, such as ( iazig padonkaff). There are two main sources for this slang: Russified English and phonetical y spel ed Russian. Because of this, it can be a little tricky to read at first, but you’l get used to it after a while. Some of the most common padonkov terms are:
Hi!
prye-VYED!
From the Russian
.
Hey there, bear!
prye-VYED, myed-VYED!
This is actual y a famous and widely quoted line from a comic strip.
Sorry for the OT.
SO-rri za off-top.
.
Misc.
flud
Some forums have a section dedicated to discussion of al kinds of
miscel aneous crap. That section is cal ed the
(flud), or the
( flu-DIL-ka).
Y’all have posted a lot of crap here!
nu i na-flu-DI-li tut!
This is usual y the criticism when people have posted a bunch of random stuff outside the designated area.
Pet name for Google
GO-sha
Pet name for Yandex (the largest Russian Web portal
and search engine)
YA-sha
ROFL!
a-ba-SSA-ka!
Fucking kewl!
pyes-DA-to!
From
.
A+
pyat BA-llov
5
This is a reference to the five-point Russian grading system.
FO (Fuck off)
u-BYEI se-BYA ap-STYE-nu
From
, or “kil yourself against a wal .”
That’s so cool, I’ll take two
a-khu-YET, DAI-tye dvye
GR8
ATS-tskii
From
.
(You have my) respect! rye-SPYEKT!
Funny as Hell
a-fi-GYEN-ski
So Fucking Stupid
f TOP-ku
Die in a Fire
VI-pyei IA-du
From
, or “drink poison.”
Beautiful Beyond Belief
gla-MUR-nyen-ko
You the man!
za-CHOT!
Don’t Give a Fuck
i nii-PYOT
2 Kewl
ni-pa-DYE-tski
From
.
2 Drunk 2 Type
fgav-NO
From
.
LMAO
pats-to-LOM
From
.
Beyach
STSU-ko
From
.
OMFG!
u-zho-SNAKH
Comments, please
KO-mmyen-ti, pliz
First! (as in “First poster to comment on a thread”)
PYER-vii-nakh!
You crack me up
rzhu-ni-ma-GU
From
Old Freaking News
ba-YAN
A post of some kind of creative value
kri-a-TIFF
From “creative.”
Author
aff-TAR
Refers to an Internet writer, either a poster on a forum or a blogger. From the Russian word
.
The author is on fire!
aff-TAR zhzhot
From
.
The author rules!
aff-TAR rulz!
From the English word “rules.”
We rule!
mi RU-lim!
Also from “to rule.”
LOL
r-ZHA-ka
Like English Internet language, yazik padonkov makes frequent use of abbreviations and acronyms.
ZFB
This stands for
, a transliteration of English “the fucking best.”
This is a direct transliteration from the English “IMHO.”
KG/AM
This stands for
, translated as “the post is shit and the author is an ass.”
Similar to LOL. It doesn’t real y stand for anything, though. I guess it just looks like laughing in some way.
Azh/KZ
This stands for
, translated as something like “the author is on fire, and the post rocks.”
PPKS
Stands for
, the equivalent of the English ITA.
If you turn on the Russian keyboard and hit the keys that correspond to the Latin letters PS, this is what you get. Hence, it means “PS.”
CHAPTER 8
SPORTY RUSSIAN
SPOR-TIV-NI RU-SSKI
Ah, sports. The Soviet Union was legendary for them and for al the gold medals Soviet athletes won in the Olympics. Although those glory days may be fading into the past, sports are stil a pretty big deal in Russia, especial y soccer and hockey, even though the best of the players have fled abroad for greater fame, more lucrative endorsements, and far better training facilities. Sports in Russia are reputed to be very closely connected to organized crime—no surprise, real y: Where there is money to be made, there are always people looking for their cut.
I’m into sports
ya u-vlye-KA-yus SPOR-tom
Who do you root for—Dinamo or Spartak?
za ko-VO ti bo-LYE-yesh—za di-NA-mo ili spar-TAK?
—
I’m rooting for Russia.
ya bo-LYE-yu za ro-SSI-yu.
.
Who’s the favorite?
kto fa-vo-RIT?
?
I always pull for the underdog.
ya vsyeg-DA bo-LYE-yu za an-dyer-DOG.
.
Let’s grab a beer at halftime.
da-VAI za PI-vom vo VRYE-mya PA-uzi.
.
What half is it now?
ka-KOI sei-CHAS taim?
The opposing team sucks balls. so-PYER-ni-ki—pi-de-RA-si!
—
We got beat in overtime.
nas ob-i-GRA-li v do-pol-NI-tyel-no-ye VRYE-mya.
.
Real fans don’t like glory hunters.
na-sto-YA-shi-ye bo-LYEL-schi-ki nye LYU-byat kuz-mi-CHO-va.
.
Do you think he dopes?
kak ti DU-ma-yesh, on pri-ni-MA-yet DO-ping?
He’s open!
on ot-KRIT!
The Olympic Games
o-lim-PI S-ki-ye I-gri
What are Russia’s chances at the Olympics this year?
ka-KI-ye u ro-SSII SHAN-si na o-lim-pi-A-dye v E-tom
go-DU?
Do you think Russia will win any gold medals?
kak ti DU-ma-yesh, vi-i-GRA-yet li ro-SSI-ya zo-lo-TI-ye
mye-DA-li?
?
Honored Master of Sports
za-SLU-zhe-nii MAS-ter SPOR-ta ro-SSII
This is the title given to Russian most accomplished athletes, similar to a Hal of Famer.
The major sports
GLAV-ni-ye VI-di SPOR-ta
Soccer
fut-BOL
Like most of the world, Russians cal soccer “footbal .” If you want talk about what Americans cal footbal , it is
( a-me-ri-KAN-skii
fut-BOL), or American footbal .
Goalie
vra-TAR
Fullback
za-SCHIT-nik
Halfback
po-lu-za-SCHIT-nik
Uh-oh, the ref is pulling out the yellow card.
O-pa! KA-zhe-tsya RYE-fe-ri prye-dya-VLYA-yet gor-CHICH-nik.
.
That dipshit just kicked the ball into his own post!
E-tot loch TOL-ko chto za-BRO-sil myach v svo-I vo-RO-ta!
Holy shit! He totally scored a hat trick!
yob! On vo-ob-SCHE o-FOR-mil khet-trik!
Goooooooaaaaaaal!
gooooooool!
Please, oh lord, let us win the penalty shootout.
GOS-po-di, dai nam VI-i-grat SYE-ri-yu pye-NAL-ti.
.
Fuck! Another draw!
blyad, o-PYAT ni-CHYA!
World Championship of Soccer
chem-pi-o-NAT MI-ra po fut-BOL-u