by Anna Lewis
I shook my head, trying to strip the blush away from my cheeks. Everyone would be gone soon, including Ryan, leaving me alone with Markus. The one I actually wanted to be with. I needed to get my head in the game if I didn’t want to call out the wrong name in bed or anything. That would be killer, a crazy kiss before we got together was one thing, but a fantasy this late in the game was too much.
Come on, Cassie, I told myself strictly. Get back out there, say goodbye to everyone, then get back to fun with the most incredible man ever. Forget all about everyone else, they don’t matter.
I shoved the door open and stepped back out into the party, just to notice that I was much too late. Everyone was already gone… even better. No awkward small talk.
“Oh, it’s you again.”
I closed my eyes before turning back. It seemed that Ryan intended to be the first one in the party and the last one out. God damn it, couldn’t he take a hint? Didn’t he realize that he was the one person I actually wanted gone?
“What are you doing here, Ryan?” I asked coldly. “Isn’t it time for you to leave?”
“Why do you want me gone?” He touched my shoulder and I flinched. I spun around to glare at him angrily. My face was flushed all over again. “Is it because you know you want me?”
“No, don’t be so stupid. I just want to spend more time with Markus.” I folded my arms defensively across my chest. “I need to be alone with him.”
Ryan smirked and didn’t take the hint. He stepped closer to me and really invaded my personal space. “He knows about us already, what’s the point of hiding it?”
“Us? There is no us. We had one kiss, that’s it.”
“But what a kiss it was.” He was touching me now, I could feel his torso pressed up against mine. What I really needed to do was push him away, but somehow I couldn’t quite make myself do that. “I could feel that you wanted me, even then. It was just a shame that we had to stop.”
His face was moving in, and I was getting swallowed up by the heady, dizzying lust surrounding us. It was almost as if this wasn’t really happening, as if I was just imagining it...
And then his lips crashed against mine and I felt that familiar explosion of lust. God damn it, he was right. I did want him, really badly. It wasn’t right, it confused me so much, but I couldn’t deny it. Ryan had a raw sexuality, a deep magnetism that drew me in no matter how hard I tried. His lips felt incredible against mine, I wanted this moment to last for absolute ever.
“What’s going on here?”
Markus’s voice was like a sobering bucket of ice cold water being thrown over my head. I leapt back like I’d been electrocuted, and stared frantically at him. I wanted to cry and scream all at once, I’d screwed everything up with the man I adored. I had no one else to blame for this mess but myself.
“What are you doing?” Markus smirked, stepping closer to us. “I didn’t tell you to stop.”
I glanced towards Ryan who shrugged and smirked at me. “I’m game if you are.”
Game? Were these guys suggesting what I really thought they were? Was my dirty little fantasy seriously about to come true?
***
Before I got a chance to answer, Ryan was back holding me tight, sending that lust floating through me once more. It was powerful, chemical, and even more exciting knowing that the man I really liked was watching me.
Oh my God, I was insane, that was the only explanation for it. I must’ve gone mad. I was never into anything this crazy before, or at least I thought I wasn’t. Maybe I was always a freak and it just took these two men to unlock it within me.
“You’re crazy,” Ryan murmured into my mouth as his hand cupped my chin. “In the best way possible.”
I almost lost myself in the moment, I almost totally caved into Ryan, but then Markus crashed up against my back and I remembered that he was here. His hands ran up and down my thighs from behind leaving me gasping and panting with joy. I hadn’t ever felt so turned on in my whole life, I didn’t know what to do with myself. Ryan had his mouth running all over my neck and face, Markus’s hands were everywhere… he was claiming every single part of me, each curve, each peak, and it felt wonderful.
They were both consuming me, yet somehow there was still not enough of either of them. I wanted more, I needed it all, I was like a desperate crazed person with absolutely no self-control.
I ran my fingers down Ryan’s body until I found the zipper to his trousers. I held my hand there for a moment, trying to make a rational decision. If I took this step, it told the guys that I was truly in, that I was ready for what was to come. It wasn’t the smartest decision, but it was the one I desperately wanted.
Do it, Cassie, my wicked brain told me. It’ll be incredible.
So I slid my eyes shut and I just went for it. There was no point in second guessing myself anymore I was getting everything that I wanted. It felt too good, I was too overwhelmed with lust to turn my back on this now.
As Ryan’s trousers fell down and I shoved his underwear away with it, Markus was hitching my dress up and put his hands where I was aching for him. There was a deep pulse in my panties, one that needed to be explored, and he drew nearer to that hot, wet desire while panting and gasping into my ear.
I wrapped my hand around Ryan’s oversized, throbbing cock just as Markus’s fingers plunged into me, massaging me, feeling every damn delicious inch of me. It was all happening so quickly, yet not fast enough, I loved the sensations I had crashing all over my body, it felt utterly phenomenal. So much so that I could barely stand…
“Come on, let me take you to the bedroom.” I crashed into Markus’s arms, falling apart as he held me, and the two men deliberately took me into the one room where this would heat up yet another notch.
My heart was boiling hot with desire, my fingers were tingling with bliss, my lips felt rough and ready for action… my body was completely prepared for what was to come next, even if my brain hadn’t totally caught up yet. But that didn’t matter, I wasn’t interested in what my brain had to say anyway. This wasn’t the sort of thing that needed to be thought over.
As I cascaded into the comfortable bed sheets that were now very familiar to me, I couldn’t help but consider how different the situation was. This was a brand new sexual experience for me, and I enjoyed the way that made me feel. It thrilled me to know that my body was being opened up to another possible way to enjoy myself.
I’d spent far too long being closed off and sensible. Now was the time to shake all of that off, it was finally time to be free.
Ryan tore at the only item of clothing he had left on him, his shirt, before climbing over my body so that I could feel the weight of him pressed against me. I was acutely aware of Markus frantically taking off his clothing too, but I couldn’t look at him, not quite yet. Ryan had his lips on my neck, tickling a very erogenous zone of mine, then he moved them down to my chest. He was edging ever closer to my nipples, but he couldn’t access them because I had too much material in the way, so I heaved myself into a sitting position, and I whipped the dress up over my head in a split second.
Ryan smirked at me, and I smiled back, all the while tugging on the clasp of my bra. My nipples were standing to attention, basically screaming out for him, and I desperately needed to know how they would feel in his mouth.
The second they were free, Ryan pushed me back onto the bed and he took one of them in his mouth. I cried out loudly, my whole body buckled a little bit, this felt fucking phenomenal. I grabbed onto Ryan’s light-colored hair and arched further into him.
Then I spotted Markus, standing to attention right in front of me. My hands immediately slipped off Ryan, I wanted to get a feel of that cock instead. Sensing how badly I wanted to touch him, Markus edged his way closer to me, smiling the whole time.
I needed a taste, I wanted him close enough so that I could wrap my lips around him…
“Oh fuck!” I’d become so distracted by Markus, that it wasn’t until Ryan’s tongue wa
s buried deep into me that I recalled what this was. This was two hot men, both desperate for my body.
Maybe I wasn’t quite as plain as I’d always assumed I was!
Ryan ran his lips and his tongue all over my slit until he found my clit. There he circled and drew patterns, which caused my body to heat up and swell all over. This felt so good, so incredible, and I wanted to share that with Markus too.
Eventually he was near enough for me to just about lick him. It seemed to amuse Markus to see how much I needed him in my mouth, so he teased me, sending every part of me wild. I wanted to slide him into my throat, to feel him fill my lips completely.
“Bit desperate aren’t we, you dirty girl?” He looked so damn pleased with himself I wanted to laugh.
“Yes,” I panted. “Just come here will you.”
As I got exactly what I wanted, an involuntary moan escaped my mouth, causing me to hum along his length. Markus shivered, he grunted, he sounded a little animalistic actually. I adored that, it felt really good to do that to him… especially when Ryan was driving me ever closer to the brink of passion. The pressure was building, the pleasure was growing and swelling through my body, I was about to lose it.
And then Ryan hovered up over my body and he slammed his wonderful cock into me, sending me over the edge. I couldn’t contain it anymore, it was all too much. These two men had bliss swallowing me whole, crashing over me like a tsunami. I couldn’t control myself as I thrashed, as I writhed, it was wonderful. I was shuddering, buckling, collapsing and it felt amazing.
I couldn’t even scream out, I couldn’t even yell loudly with this bliss because I was still tasting Markus…
However he wasn’t being so quiet. “Oh fuck, Cassie, you’re wonderful. You have no idea what you’re doing to me. You feel so… so…” I couldn’t recall him being so vocal the last time we were together, but I had to say I really liked it.
As he exploded that sweet, salty desire into my mouth, dribbling some of it down my chin, my heart fluttered and hammered with pleasure in my chest. Ryan was still working me, causing the intense, powerful orgasm to continue. I was in Heaven, flying high, my head was utterly dizzy with desire. He wouldn’t be long either, I could tell from the way his thighs were tense and trembling. Soon we would all have fallen apart, and unfortunately that moment felt like it was coming for me far too quickly.
I never wanted this moment to end, and it didn’t feel like it ever would. I felt like my body would always feel this great, that this pleasure would never subside. With Ryan and Markus both in this bed I didn’t think I’d ever feel normal again.
There was a chance that I was the luckiest woman alive.
***
Oh my God, what have I done?
I bolted upright in the bed, fear and terror coursing right through my system. I just couldn’t believe it, how the hell had I let that happen? Why did I allow things to go so far?
I glanced down towards the bed, looking down at the two men that lay next to me. They were both so peaceful, sleeping happily with no demons whatsoever plaguing them… but then again, why shouldn’t they? Maybe this was the sort of thing that they did all the time, and I was just another girl in the ever revolving door of women they used for their games.
Shit, I needed to get out, I had to make my escape before the both of them woke up and wanted to have a super awkward chat about the whole thing. There was no way in hell I could discuss that. To be honest I just wanted to forget that it’d ever happened. I’d wrecked everything now, I’d totally messed up any genuine chance I had with Markus, and now I needed to escape before I truly broke down and wept.
I slid out from under the sheets and picked up my scattered items of clothing, cringing every time a memory flickered into my brain; lips, teeth, tongues, torsos, body parts everywhere. My entire body heated up with the utter shame of it all.
Tear pricked my eyes as I covered up my body. This was officially the most insane bold move that I’d ever taken, and I had a feeling that I would regret it forever.
With that thought in mind, I took one final glance at the two men I’d now have to strike off my list of people I could never be in the same room as alone again, then I scurried out the door like a terrified mouse, escaping the vicious, wild cat.
Or two of them, in my case.
This walk of shame was one I’d rather not have taken, I felt like every single person was looking at me, judging me, knowing exactly what I’d done. I kept my eyes fixed downwards so I didn’t have to look at anyone. I just didn’t like the horrible sense that I had inside, I hated the feeling that I’d done something wrong. By the time I crashed through the door to my apartment, there was only one person in the world that I felt comfortable talking to.
Ring, ring…
“Come on, Amber, I need you,” I muttered in frustration while hopping from foot to foot.
Ring, ring…
It wasn’t that early, was it?
Ring…
“Hello?” She finally answered sleepily. “Is everything alright with you, Cassie? It’s like the middle of the night.”
“It so isn’t,” I hissed a little angrily. “Look, I really need to talk to you. It’s so important.”
“Ooh, is it about the party? How did that go? Was it the most magical night ever? You looked incredible.”
I glanced down at the dress I still had on, just because I wasn’t totally sure where my original clothes were. Only this time I couldn’t see it in the same way, it looked a little trashy. “It didn’t quite go to plan,” I warned her before kicking off with the story. “Things got very complicated, very quickly.”
“Complicated how?” Amber was more alert now, intrigued to hear more. “What happened?”
I slumped onto the couch and slid my eyes shut, ready to tell my most shameful secret ever. “Ryan was there, to begin with.”
“Who’s Ryan?”
“Oh my God, don’t you remember anything? Ryan, the guy I kissed at the Christmas party? Markus’s friend?” The more I said it aloud, the worse it sounded.
“Oh no, did he tell Markus about it?”
If only that was the problem! “No, Markus already knew, I told him beforehand. It was just weird. They were like, competing over me.”
“That sounds hot as hell!” Amber exclaimed, not sensing any distress in my voice. “I bet that riled you up like mad, didn’t it?”
I couldn’t help but smirk just a little at that remark. It seemed I wasn’t as strange as I first assumed. Maybe I needed to stop worrying so much. “It did actually… which is how things took a turn for the crazier.”
“What do you mean?” She slurped loudly, clearly relishing this gossip session. Actually it felt good to be the one providing the information for once, usually I was on the sidelines listening to her fun stories.
If only mine didn’t have such a tragic ending.
“Well, we… slept together.” Silence. A silence rang out so loudly I almost freaked out all over again. “All three of us.”
“No. Fucking. Way.” Okay, so she didn’t sound judgy or pissed off which was a good thing. If anything, she actually sounded a little impressed. “Sensible Cassie had a threesome with her hot billionaire boss and his just as rich friend. Are you kidding me? Is this a joke?”
“Nope. No joke.” A giggle rose in my throat. Amber’s shock was enough to wash away at least some of the guilt. “It really happened. And trust me, I’m just as stunned as you are.”
“How was it?”
“Honestly, at the time it was absolutely amazing. I had the best time ever, but now… well, now I feel a bit weird. This morning I freaked out and ran off before either of them could wake up.”
“Why? I thought you were going to marry Markus!”
“He’s hardly going to want to marry me now, is he?” I laughed mirthlessly, hating the reality of that statement.
“Why not? He was just as involved as you, remember?”
“I know, but it’s different, isn�
��t it?”
“Why?”
Amber stumped me with that question. Why was it different? It hardly made sense, did it? “Dunno, just is,” I eventually mumbled childishly. “Just the way it is.”
“So now what are you going to do?”
Great, another question that I couldn’t answer. Now it was finally time to tell Amber the truth, but that was mainly because all hope was lost. “I really like Markus, I have done for a very long time.” The words felt bittersweet on my tongue. I’d had him, he was within my reach. I could’ve had everything I ever wanted and I threw it all away. “And now I think I’m going to have to quit my job. I don’t think I can face him every day, it’ll kill me. It’s been hard enough seeing him anyway, but now I know what we could’ve been and I allowed one night of madness to ruin it.”
“It doesn’t have to be the end though, does it?” Amber asked me a little desperately. “There are ways around it.”
But I couldn’t see any of them. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack, it just wasn’t there. “I don’t think so,” I told her sadly. “I think this is well and truly over.” And with that, my heart shattered into a million pieces in my chest.
***
I got into work super early the following Monday, because I needed to be the first there. I had to prepare myself for the utter humiliation that was to come. I needed to get myself totally ready for the worst day of my whole life.
I’m sorry, Mr. Smith, I practiced the speech again in my brain. I don’t think I can work for you anymore. I can either work out my notice until you find someone else… I desperately prayed that he didn’t go for that option. Or I can leave right now.
If I just didn’t look him in the eye, it’d be simple. I could just about get through it without totally losing my shit. I never wanted to leave this job, especially not under these unexpected conditions, but what else could I do? There was no way I could stay with my emotions all over the place, I’d end up going insane.