by Anna Brooks
“Come here.” He takes me to the attached bathroom that is just as bright as his bedroom.
Steam begins to fill the large room and after he checks the temperature, he pulls me into the door-less shower. Just as I’m about to step under the spray, he tugs my towel and lets it fall. The warm water feels wonderful as it cascades down my body from four different jets.
Strong fingers massage shampoo into my hair and I roll my shoulders to relieve some tension from my near death experience. When the flower smell hits me, I open my eyes to find his gaze on my chest. I clear my throat and he looks at me and shrugs. “You’re beautiful; I can’t help it.”
“Is this your shampoo?”
“No.”
“Why do you have flowery shampoo?” The thought that he keeps this for women pisses me right off. I don’t have a say in his personal life and I don’t even know what we are, but still. I can’t help the cattiness from spewing out.
“I had them bring it up for you.”
Well now I feel stupid. “Oh.”
He smiles and leans me back to rinse the suds out of my hair. “I’ll leave you so you can finish showering.”
I want to tell him to wait, but logically I know I shouldn’t. He kisses my nose, then steps out and wraps a towel around his swim shorts before leaving. I push down my underwear and take off my bra, then wash quickly. Regretfully, I shut the spa shower off and wrap myself up in the softest towel known to man, then brush my teeth and dry my hair with the stuff that was set out on the countertop.
By the time I make it back into his bedroom, Alex is sitting on the end of the bed in a pair of long gray pajama pants. And that’s it. He doesn’t even realize how sexy he is.
“I set your suitcase right there.” He points to it sitting next to the dresser. “Do you need anything else before you go to sleep?”
“No, thanks.”
“Okay.” He stands and hesitates before taking a step toward the door. “Goodnight.”
“Where are you going?”
“To sleep in the other room.”
“Why?”
“Because I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I already ruined tonight and I don’t want to make it worse by assuming you want to sleep next to me.”
“I do, though.”
His hands rest on his hips and he drops his head for a second before lifting it up again. “You tempt me, Josey. I’m not… I don’t think I can control myself if I’m in a bed with you. Don’t ask me to.”
“I’m not asking you to.” I loosen the towel and let it slide down my naked body. “You tempt me too. I shouldn’t want you, but I do. I didn’t come to a whole new city running from one man only to fall into the arms of another. But sometimes things happen that we can’t explain, Alex.”
He steps closer to me. “This isn’t just a casual thing for me Josey. I don’t do this.” He motions between the two of us. “I’m far too busy and I have so much shit on my plate right now that I’m not sure at the moment I could be the kind of man you deserve.” I try to talk but he shakes his head. “That doesn’t mean that I don’t want to try. That I wouldn’t make you a priority if the time was right. Shit, I’ve never done this before.”
“You’re a virgin?” I cover my mouth as soon as the words leave it.
He laughs and looks to the ceiling to catch his breath.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude; I just can’t believe that someone as hot as you and as rich as you has never…” Shut up, Josey.
“No. I’m not a virgin. I’ve screwed women before. I’ve had sex with them. I’ve fucked them.”
“Oh.”
He reaches out and frames my face. “But I’ve never cared about one enough to make love to her. I’ve never shared my space with anyone. I’ve never left a business trip to be with one. I’ve never been around a woman who makes my chest hurt.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.” I mimic him and hold his face. “You’ve been hurt enough already, haven’t you?”
“Don’t, Josey.” The clipped words make me jump.
“I’m sorry.” My thumbs rub across the smooth skin of his jaw before I drop my hand. “What are we doing?”
His nonresponse is all the answer I need.
“I get it. There will be no hard feelings. Let’s just have tonight.”
“I don’t know if I can do it, Jo. It’s not fair to you.”
“What’s not fair?”
He stabs himself in the chest. “Me.”
“Why?”
“There are things going on in my life right now that I can barely handle. And fuck, I want to get lost in you and have you take it all away. There’s a part of me that thinks I could do it, that we would be so fucking good together. But I also don’t want to make promises I can’t keep. I don’t want to hurt you. And I don’t want you to think I’m using you.”
“I don’t mind.” I move to the bed and lie down then spread my legs.
His sweat pants tent in the front and he scrubs his hands down his face. “Damn it.”
“It’s okay, Alex. I don’t need the complications of a relationship either. I’m trying to get a fresh start over here in Portland, but there’s something between us. Can’t we just enjoy tonight and not worry about tomorrow?”
He crawls up the bed and settles between my legs. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. I’m positive.”
His head falls and rests between my breasts. The soft breaths from his mouth become heavier, and his tongue snakes out and flicks at my nipple. “Fuck, Josey. I want you so bad.”
“So take me.”
A rumble sounds in his throat before he sits up and pulls his sweats off, kicking them onto the floor. I lean up to meet him as he’s coming back down to me and our lips fuse together. My entire body tingles from the contact of his tongue against mine, neither fighting for control, rather seeking acceptance. My hands grab at him, squeezing and tugging, desperate to get him closer.
His dick bobs against my thigh, the wet tip seeking entrance already. I raise my hips, but he pushes them down with a hand and pulls away from my mouth. “Let me make you come first.”
“I already did.”
“That was hours ago.”
He begins to make his descent down my body, his lips kissing and sucking across my collarbone and his hands kneading and sliding between my breasts and down my side. “I didn’t get to take my time earlier, and I want to kiss every single inch of your skin before I take you.”
Who am I to argue? It’s not like I could anyways, because he spreads me open and twirls my wetness around with his finger, then sucks it into his mouth. “Just needed a snack to hold me over.”
I pant and try to ask him what he’s talking about, but he begins kissing down my thigh and makes good on his promise to kiss every inch of me. Unhurried, his mouth worships my body, lifting my leg to pay attention to the skin that I didn’t even realize was sensitive, right below where my butt meets the back of my thigh.
“Oh, my god, Alex.” I squirm beneath him, not sure how much more I can take, when he lowers my leg and lifts the other to give it the same treatment. “You have to stop.”
My leg falls and his mouth is between my thighs sucking on my clit before I even blink. “Holy shit!” His finger penetrates me and that’s all it takes to make me shatter. I sink into the mattress a little further as I lose control of my senses and my brain becomes foggy.
A breath that was trapped in my lungs escapes. “Damn.”
He rests his forearms on either side of my head. “I could do that for hours, Josey. You’re absolutely heavenly.” His lips whisper over mine. “Fucking exquisite.”
He reaches between us and rubs himself against me, toying with my entrance and then finally sliding inside in one long, smooth, slow stroke. “Fuck, fuck. Josey, you’re perfect.”
“You are, too.” And man, do I mean that. He just fits. Nothing has ever been so… right.
I urge him on by lifting my hips, needing more. As much
as I love the time he spent on me before, I really just want him to let loose. His eyes don’t leave mine, and every time he slides back in, his jaw clenches. Moisture beads on his forehead and his grunting becomes uncontrolled.
My legs wrap around his lower back. “Alex?”
“You okay?”
“Fuck me.”
His hands wrap around mine and he raises them above my head and kisses my neck. Then he fucks me like I asked. His hips pound and he growls against my skin. Each time he thrusts against me, my clit begs for it even more, so when he begins to go even faster, I tighten around him and throw my head back as I come for the third time in one day. “I’m coming, Alex.” He sucks on my neck and continues hammering into me while I swivel my hips and ride out the rest of my orgasm.
My head falls to the side and my sated body moves as one with his. “Shit, fuck.” He curses and warm wetness lands on my stomach. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
He releases my hands and I sit up and watch him stroke himself as the last few drops land on my rib cage.
“Damn it, Josey. I didn’t use a condom, but I swear to you I’m clean. Are you on the pill or anything?”
I shake my head. “I’m clean, too, but I stopped taking anything a while ago.” The thought of getting pregnant scares the shit out of me. “I’m sure it’ll be fine, since you, ya know…” I point to my stomach.
“I’m so fucking sorry. If something happens, I promise I’ll help you. I’d never abandon a baby or leave you to deal with it on your own.”
“It’s okay.”
“Fuck that was good. You’re amazing, Josey.” He kisses my head. “Stay put.”
I collapse onto the unbelievably soft mattress and almost fall asleep before he comes back a minute later with a warm wet washcloth. He wipes my stomach off and I giggle as he dries my ticklish sides.
After tossing the towels away, he crawls into bed with me and we snuggle under the blankets. His arms wrap around me and I intertwine our fingers. “Whatever happens, just know that I’ll always be here for you. If you ever need anything, just call.”
“You act like you’re never going to see me again.”
He stiffens behind me and I roll over to my side to look at him. “Alex?”
“Go to sleep, Josey.” He scatters kisses on my face and the soft strum of his fingers up and down my arm lull me into one of the deepest sleeps I can remember having.
* * *
Six Weeks Later
“Josey,” Mr. Russell hollers at me through his closed door. I grit my teeth together and push myself out of my seat.
Maybe it’s not fair that I started this job with a major chip on my shoulder, but Ryan Russell is the biggest dick face I’ve ever met. And I swear I’m going to take my letter opener and stab him in the eye if he looks at my boobs again.
Without knocking on the door, I step into his office and put on a fake smile. “Yes?”
“Clear my schedule. I have a potential client coming in who demands my attention.”
“Mr. Russell, you have three meetings this afternoon and two of them have already been rescheduled twice.”
He snaps his head up from the papers he’s rummaging through. His beady eyes shoot daggers into me and his pointer finger jabs in the air at me. “I didn’t ask your opinion. I said clear my schedule. If you’re not competent enough to do that, then I’ll have to find someone who is.”
“Fine.”
I have been a paralegal my entire life, but never have I ever worked for such a condescending prick. When I took this job, I was under the assumption that I would be working on legal cases and not being a coffee bitch. But life doesn’t work out that way, does it?
After getting yelled at by everyone that I had to reschedule, I go to the restroom and take a little while longer than usual just because I don’t want to go back out to my desk. By the time I get back out, Mr. Russell’s door is closed and two male voices are muffled from inside. His appointment must be here.
I sit back down at my desk and grab my phone to pass the time, since the only things I do are answer his phone and schedule appointments. And get his coffee and dry cleaning.
I’m immersed in my game of solitaire, contemplating if I should undo my move to try and cheat.
“I don’t pay you to play games on your phone.”
My phone slips from my hands and I whip my head up at a very angry Mr. Russell.
“Go get us some coffee.”
For some reason I don’t stand up fast enough and he leans into me and pokes a finger at my forehead. “Can you hear, you damn moron?”
His anger makes me freeze in place, and my eyes begin to burn, when suddenly he’s out of my face.
“Ever. You ever fucking touch her or talk to her like that again, I will destroy you. There’s not a dirty trick in the book money can’t buy, Ryan, and I’ll gladly lose it all if you fucking touch her again. We clear?”
Holy shit. Holy shit.
Mr. Russell doesn’t answer, and Alex slams him against the wall. “I said, are we clear?”
“Fine.”
Alex releases him and without turning around to face me, sticks his hand out in my direction. “Let’s go, Josey.”
“You can’t be serious?” Mr. Russell admonishes.
“Dead.” Alex wiggles his fingers. “Jojo. Let’s go.”
At the mention of my nickname, I grab my purse and phone, then take Alex’s hand and follow him to the elevator. Right before the door slides shut, a hand wraps around it, and I scream when Mr. Russell sticks his head in. Alex wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me close to him.
“You’ll regret this, Owens.”
“No I won’t.”
Mr. Russell scoffs at him and then angles his head at me. “You sure you’re better off with him?”
Instead of answering, I squeeze tighter to Alex, his strong body bringing me security in this crazy fucked up situation.
“Leave us.” Alex commands.
“You know why he was here to see me, right, Josey?”
“We’re done.” Alex lets me go and pushes Mr. Russell out of the elevator so he falls on his ass.
As the doors are closing, he stands up and wipes his hands on his pants, then looks at me. “Murder.”
I gasp at the same time the door closes, and Alex hangs his head.
“What?”
“Josey—”
“Alex, what the hell?”
He doesn’t answer, but shoves his hands into his suit pants pockets and rocks back on his heels. As soon as the door opens, I run out and onto the street. He chases after me, and when I turn a corner, I stop to catch my breath.
“You fucking left me in bed and never called.”
“You never called me, either, Josey.”
“Now you show up and I find out you’re being charged with murder? What the fuck, Alex?”
“I told you I had a lot going on and I didn’t want to drag you into my shit. Look,”—he looks around and runs a hand through his hair—“can we not do this here?”
“Do what?” I push past him.
“Fuck, Josey, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
“Murder?” I whisper.
He rubs a hand on the back of his neck. “It was a long time ago.”
“Is it true?”
“It was a long time ago; I was seventeen. It wasn’t my fault, I swear.”
“So it’s true.”
“Josey, please. Can we not do this here?”
I look at him, really look at him. His beautiful green eyes plead with me and I remember how much our time together meant. There’s no way I believe that he killed somebody. “How could you just leave me?”
“This is why. This, right here.” He motions between the two of us. “Because I knew once you found out you wouldn’t want to be with me, and I didn’t want to drag you through this with me.”
“Why didn’t you just tell me?”
A homeless man runs into Alex and then makes his way down the alley past
me. “Can we please not do this here?”
“Fine.”
He holds his hand out for me and I hesitate to take it.
“I would never, ever hurt you.”
Knowing he’s telling the truth, I link our hands together and follow him back to his vehicle. He helps me climb up in the seat, and the drive back to his place is silent. After the valet comes around, we take the elevator up. I make myself at home and plop down on his couch.
He stands in front of me and wastes no time talking. “It happened when I was seventeen and I swear to you it was self-defense. I really don’t want to get into the details, but he was a distant relative, and now his mom is suing me because she finally got sober enough to realize I had money.”
“Oh my god.”
“Both she and her son had addiction issues, and at the time it happened they didn’t even consider me a suspect.”
“So what’s happening now?”
“She says she found evidence and she’ll go to the police if I don’t give her money.”
“How does she know?”
He sits down next to me and rubs my thigh. “She doesn’t. She’s making it up. All she wants is money.”
“Why don’t you just give it to her?”
“She’s not getting shit.” His palm squeezes my flesh. “I worked my ass off to get where I am, and I’ll be damned if she’s gonna get a penny of it.”
“How much does she want?”
“Half a million.”
“Dollars?”
“Yes.”
“Holy shit,” I pant.
“It’s not even the money, it’s the principal.”
He goes to the kitchen and comes back with a couple of bottles of water.
“So you’d rather have your name dragged through the mud than pay her?”
“I don’t have anything to hide or lose. Why the fuck not?”
I take a swallow of water and set the bottle down, then stand in front of him. “Because I don’t want you to be in jail when our baby is born.”
His eyes widen and he looks at my stomach, then back at me. Then back down one more time. “What?”
“I’m pregnant.”
“Oh, my god.”
“But you’re not getting one more single chance, Alex. You already fucked up once, and this is the only time you have to make it right.”