“Definitely,” he said, grinning. “In the best possible way.”
“Actually, Rennie suggested it. We’re both a little fanatical about Christmas and this seemed like a fun way to earn extra money.”
“If money’s tight I’d be happy to—”
“Ah-uh,” she said, covering his mouth with her finger. “I love you for offering, but don’t.”
I love you. Those, of course, were the only words he heard. “Are you working full-time for your aunt?”
“About thirty hours a week right now. That still gives me about twenty hours a week to do this. Most jobs only take about five hours, so I can fit in four clients a week.”
“Sounds like you’ll be pretty busy between now and Christmas.” He didn’t want to be too demanding, but the guy who was usually chained to his desk was eager to tear himself away if it meant he could spend more time with her.
“I suppose I will. They’re doing a little Christmas concert at Ainsley’s school.” She linked her hand with his. “I’m really looking forward to that. It’ll be her first time on stage. I don’t know who’ll be more nervous, her or me.”
Kevin couldn’t help but feel she was trying to avoid making plans with him. “That sounds like fun. Mind if I tag along?”
“Somehow I couldn’t see you front and center in a crowded little room with a bunch of other parents capturing the moment with cell phones and cameras.”
“I am a parent, Bree.” He tried not to sound defensiveness when he said, “I understand how much your daughter means to you, and I know if we’re going to have a future, Ainsley is going to be a huge part of that. I want her to get to know me. I want to get to know her. Is that okay?” When she didn’t respond, the doubts that surfaced while they were making love came back with a vengeance.
“You’re not saying anything. Does that mean you don’t want me to get to know your daughter?”
“I didn’t say that.” She tapped his arm with the palm of her hand. “Of course I want y’all to get to know each other, but we need to take this slow. She’s just a little girl. Danny is old enough to understand these things. Ainsley isn’t. All she knows is that me and her daddy aren’t living together anymore. She doesn’t understand why and I don’t think she’d understand why her mama’s spending so much time with another man.”
“I’m not just any man,” he said, trying to rein in his frustration. “I was an important part of your life once. I’d like to be again.”
“I want that too.” She twisted to face him. “You have to believe me. I just need some time to adjust to this.”
He knew she was being reasonable. There’d barely had time to catch their breath before falling into bed together, but he’d never been good at putting on the brakes. He was more of a peddle-to- the-metal kind of guy. Especially where Bree was concerned.
“Fine, take all the time you need. I won’t pressure you.”
She turned to face him, stroking his cheek with her palm as she smiled at him. “Finding you again has been the best possible surprise. When I moved back home, I didn’t even consider the possibility of us reconnecting. As far as I knew, you were happily married.”
He rolled his eyes, tightening his grip on her. “I don’t know that I ever would have described myself as happily married.”
“My point is,” she said, obviously choosing her words carefully, “we’re getting a second chance here. Can’t we just be grateful for that, enjoy every second of it, and let the future take care of itself?”
He’d tried that once before with her and he wound up broken-hearted and alone. This time he wanted to be more pro-active, to ensure she knew exactly how he felt about her, leaving no room in her mind for doubt.
“You know me well enough to know I’m not a patient man,” he said, smiling to soften the warning. “When I want something, I go after it. And I want you in my life.”
“I want that too, but we’re not kids anymore.” Her lips curved slightly before she said, “We have kids of our own now and they’ve both had to deal with a lot of upheaval in their lives lately. They’re feeling vulnerable and confused. It’s our job to make them feel safe and secure.”
Just hearing how concerned she was about not only her own daughter, but also his son reinforced what he already knew. She was a great mother. She’d be the best step-mother Danny could ask for and he couldn’t wait to raise a child of their own together. He knew he was getting ahead of himself, but the way he felt about her, he couldn’t see this playing out any other way.
“Why are you looking at me that way?” she asked, looking self-conscious. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“I’m thinking Ainsley’s lucky to have a mama like you.” He brushed his hand over her tousled hair. “And I’m lucky too. Lucky I got to be your first lover and I’m telling you now, I want to be your last, Bree.”
She closed her eyes as she turned into his hand, pressing her lips to his palm. “I want that too and I believe we’ll get there in due time.”
* * *
Waking up to Bree’s warm body the next morning, knowing she intended to spend part of the day at his house decorating the tree made it difficult to think about going to work.
“I’m gonna call in today,” he said, kissing her bare shoulder. “I’ll hang out here with you, and maybe after you finish with the tree, we can go shopping for a new bed for my room.” He understood why she wouldn’t want to make love in the bed he’d shared with this wife. No way would he think of sleeping with her in the bed she’d shared with her husband.
“You can’t just take the day off,” she said, rolling on to her back. “Can you?”
“I can do whatever I want,” he said, scraping the stubble on his chin against her soft cheek. “I’m the boss, remember?”
She chuckled. “Yeah, but when was the last time you played hooky?”
“Uh, never.” He buried his face in her neck, inhaling her sweet scent. “All the more reason for me to do it today. I can work a bit from home while you’re decorating the tree, then we can do some shopping and pick Ainsley up from school, maybe take her out to dinner?”
Looking uneasy, her eyes wandered to the pattern she was tracing on his bicep with her fingertip. “I’d love to spend the day with you, but…”
“You’re not ready for Ainsley to know we’re dating?” He shouldn’t be surprised, given her speech last night. “Fine, you can pick your daughter up on your own. But I’d still like to spend some time with you today.”
“I’d like that too.” She smiled, kissing his lips. “But are you sure you won’t be shirking your responsibilities?”
He rolled on to his back, dreading the conversation he’d been putting off since he walked in the door last night. “So, I got an interesting call yesterday.”
Bree curled into him, laying her hand on his chest as she covered his legs with hers. “Tell me about it.”
“Uh, it was from the governor’s office.”
She sat up, staring down at him, wide-eyed. “The governor’s office? Are you serious?”
“They’re looking to appoint someone to the Texas Court of Criminal Appeals until the next election. One of the judges is ill and can no longer perform his duties. It would be unusual for them to choose someone like me, since I have no judicial experience, but apparently the governor has followed my career and feels I’d be an ideal candidate.”
“Oh my God,” she squealed, sitting up as the sheet slipped down. “Kev, that’s so exciting. You said you weren’t loving private practice anymore. This could be the answer you’ve been looking for.”
He may have agreed with her a few weeks ago, but now that she’d come back into his life, he couldn’t think about walking away from her or his son. “Yeah, but…”
“But could you leave your practice?” she asked, frowning. “I mean, how would that work?”
“I have great attorneys working for me,” he said, holding her hand against his chest. “If I wanted to, I could work out a part
nership deal with them, but that’s not my biggest concern.”
“What is?”
“Baby, this is in Austin. We’re talking about a three- to four-hour commute.”
Her face fell. “Oh.”
“I know you love your life here and I couldn’t ask you to leave that behind. Besides, it would make it difficult for me to see Danny. And the last thing I want is for him to start questioning my commitment to him.”
“But how can you turn this down?” she asked, biting her lip. “I know nothing about what you do, but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that this is the opportunity of a lifetime.”
Of course she was right, but he’d made the mistake of putting his career before his family before. He didn’t want to make the same mistake with her. “I don’t have to make a decision right now. They’re going to give me a bit of time to think about it. I just wanted to be honest with you, to let you know the offer’s out there.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about this last night?” She scooted back on the king-sized bed, putting more distance between them. “You should have told me before we slept together.”
“Why?” He reached for her, feeling his throat constrict when she inched her way to the edge of the bed. “This may be a moot point. I haven’t even decided what I’m going to do yet. Believe me, I don’t even want to think about leaving you. Last night just reinforced that.”
“I can’t stand in your way, Kev.” Her eyes filled with tears. “I won’t do that to you.”
“I’m a grown man,” he said, sighing. “I make my own decisions. Whether I choose to pursue this opportunity or not, it’s all on me. Besides, even if I do go, it may be temporary. It’s an elected position and there are no guarantees I’ll be elected next term.”
He knew he was arguing against it, instead of for it, which told him all he needed to know. Leaving Bree and Danny didn’t feel right. Not now, when they were still trying to figure out where they stood.
“Please, you’re the most charismatic man I know when you turn on the charm. It’s what makes you such a good lawyer. No way would they not vote for you.”
Grasping at straws, he said, “It’s far from a done deal, Bree. Even if I do want the position, the Senate still has to approve it, which they may not, given the fact I have no judicial experience.” He didn’t want this to cause a rift between them, especially since he didn’t think he could move to Austin without leaving his heart in Arlington.
“I have to take a shower and get to work,” she said, wrapping the sheet around her as she stood.
“I’ll make us some breakfast,” he said, trying to ignore the pang of uneasiness he felt.
“Don’t bother. I lost my appetite.”
* * *
The hot water mixed with her tears as Bree watched the shampoo swirl down the drain. She should have known it was too good to be true. She wasn’t lucky enough to get a second chance with a guy like Kevin.
Maybe if she’d had the backbone to stand up to his father years ago, things would have turned out differently. They would have been married with a few kids of their own by now and the decision would have been easy. Of course she would have gone to Austin with him. This was the chance of a lifetime for him and she knew there was no way he could turn it down. But there was no way she could leave her aunt and uproot her daughter again, especially since there were no guarantees about their future.
Kevin opened the door, stepping into the huge frameless shower behind her as steam billowed around them. “I’m not gonna let you do this,” he whispered in her ear, pulling her body against his as he wrapped his arms around her. “I won’t let you pull away from me. We’ll figure this thing out together. Whatever’s best for us, that’s what I’ll do.”
She leaned her head against his shoulder, closing her eyes. She was grateful the rainwater shower head spraying down on them made it impossible for him to see her silent tears. She didn’t want him to feel guilty about making a decision she knew would be best for his career. “You’ve worked too damn hard to let an opportunity like this slip through your fingers.”
“I’ve lived too damn long without you. I’m not letting you slip through my fingers again either.”
Bree knew no matter how this turned out, there would be no happy ending. One of them would have to make a huge sacrifice, which could only lead to bitterness and resentment down the line.
Turning into his arms, she wrapped her arms around his neck, “You have to take this. Your son will understand. I’ll understand.”
“It’s not that simple and you know it,” he said, touching his forehead to hers. “You and Danny mean everything to me.” He ran a hand over her wet hair before adding, “I know you haven’t been a part of my life for a long time, but my heart hasn’t forgotten what you meant to me. We may have changed, but the way I feel about you hasn’t. I still love you. I think I always have.”
“I feel the same way.” Which only made letting him go again more difficult. She knew how hard it was to try and get over him, to live without him. She didn’t know if she was strong enough to do it again, but she didn’t have a choice. “You’ll be coming back to Arlington as often as you can to see Danny. We’ll see each other then.” It wouldn’t be nearly enough, but it was their only option.
“It’s that easy for you?” he asked, drawing back to look her in the eye. “You can send me away just like that?”
She knew he was hurt, but wasn’t it obvious to him that she was doing this because she loved him so much? She couldn’t stand in the way of his future. “No, this isn’t easy for me. I’m trying to help you realize there is no other option, Kev. You have to do this. If you don’t, you’ll spend the rest of your life with regrets and we both know regrets are like poison. They slowly kill you.”
His eyes never left her face when he said, “That’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? Minimizing regrets? I guess you think I’d regret not taking this job more than I’d regret leaving you?” Shaking his head, he pushed the door open. “After all these years you still don’t know me at all, Bree.”
Chapter Eight
By the time Bree made her way downstairs, Kevin was gone. Apparently, spending the day with her wasn’t as appealing as it had been when they woke up.
She followed the scent of coffee into the kitchen, smiling in spite of her foul mood when she found a bowl of cereal waiting for her on the counter. He remembered she liked Fruit Loops. Of course, now she was more health conscious than she’d been as a teenager, but she still appreciated his thoughtfulness. He was clearly trying to send her a message. He knew her. They weren’t strangers who’d had a one-night stand, they were each other’s first loves.
Pouring a cup of coffee, she made her way to the stainless steel fridge for some milk. She admired the pictures attached to the shiny surface with various magnets. Danny’s school picture caught her attention. She was surprised to find he looked nothing like his father. Kevin had dark hair and skin with light eyes. Danny had light hair, fair skin, and dark eyes.
As her eyes scanned the other pictures, she noted he didn’t look like his mother either. Trena had green eyes, fair skin, and auburn hair. She supposed she shouldn’t be too surprised. Ainsley looked exactly like her and nothing like Lyle. And she’d met many of kids who looked nothing like their parents, but exactly like their siblings.
She took the picture of the three of them off the fridge, studying it closely. They were all smiling, but the smile didn’t reach their eyes. It seemed they were smiling to please the photographer and Bree couldn’t help but wonder if that’s the way it had always been. Were they ever happy together or were they just putting on an act?
Replacing the picture, she reached into the fridge for the milk, starting when the back door opened and Mrs. Foster walked in.
“Bree.”
Her eyes scanned Bree. Thankfully, she was fully dressed, but she still felt naked as Kevin’s mother put two and two together. “Hello, Mrs. Foster. Lovely to see you again.”<
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“I’m sure it is,” she said, raising an eyebrow. “Is my son here? I brought these for him.” She held a small box. “I was cleaning out the attic yesterday and found some of his old awards. I thought he might like to have them.”
“No, he’s at work.” Bree was grateful she had a legitimate excuse for being in Kevin’s house when he wasn’t. “Rennie hired me to decorate Kevin’s house for the holidays. I was just about to get started on the tree.”
Lenora’s gaze fell to the bowl of cereal. “Don’t let me interrupt your breakfast.”
Busted. “Uh, I was just…”
“You spent the night with my son, Bree. That much is obvious.” Lenora set the box down beside the granite breakfast bar before pulling out a chair and sitting down. “I guess that means we have to have a little chat, doesn’t it?”
Lenora Foster was an intimidating woman. Almost as intimidating as her husband, but if she could handle John, she could handle his other half. “With all due respect, Mrs. Foster, what happens between your son and myself is our business, no one else’s.”
“Ah, but that’s where you’re wrong. You both have children to consider.”
“And I can assure you that we’re both putting our children first.”
Bree put four slices of toast in the toaster, in case Mommy Dearest wanted to join her, before filling another mug with coffee and setting both on the breakfast bar. She tried a few cabinets before she finally found the sugar and sweetener, setting them both down in front of Lenora.
Lenora watched Bree pour milk into a small pitcher before extracting the honey, butter, and jam from the fridge. “You’re a good mother, Bree. Anyone can see that.”
Stunned by the compliment, it took Bree a second to find her voice. “Thank you.”
“You have a lovely daughter who obviously thinks you hung the moon.” She smiled her thanks when Bree set a plate of toast with a knife down in front of her. “I watched you and Rennie with your girls at Thanksgiving. It’s obvious you two are very much alike.”
Fast Break (Texas Titans Holiday) Page 8