The Summer We Changed (Relentless Book 1)

by Barbara C. Doyle

  Dylan’s face lights up. “That reminds me.” He digs something out of his back pocket. It’s two rectangular pieces of paper. He passes them to her.

  She squeaks. “These say Madison Square Garden … and Relentless.”

  Ian grins. “We’re booked to be one of the performers that night. We all thought that it would be a good birthday present. Maybe you could snap some pics if you want, or just come and enjoy the show.”

  She jumps up, and wraps her arms around Ian and Dylan. “I told you guys not to get me anything, but this is awesome!”

  Ian looks over her shoulder at me and winks. I glare at him.

  “You should bring Will,” he tells her in amusement. “I’m sure he’d love the show.”

  She pulls away, giving him a warning glare. “Behave.”

  He sighs heavily. “Whatever you say, but you’re draining my entertainment for the night.”

  The large screen flickering indicates that the movie is about to start. I gesture for Tess to follow me, grabbing some pillows and blankets from the cab of my truck and moving them to the bed.

  It’s tradition to build our own little spot in the bed of my truck whenever we come. Usually, it’s filled with just about any junk food you could imagine. Last time we were here, Tess insisted we stop by the pizza shop and order dinner. We had enough food to feed everybody who showed up.

  Did we share?

  Hell no.

  Tess looks back in the cab, her eyes focusing on the guitar I have sitting on the backseat.

  “You brought Betty?”

  My eyes furrow. “Betty? You named my guitar.”

  She shrugs. “It needed a name, since it’s important to you.”

  I chuckle. “Yes, I brought … I’m not calling it Betty. I brought my guitar because I have something for you.” She gives me a look, but I shut it down. “I know you said no gifts, but I didn’t buy anything. I wrote something.”

  Her eyes widen a fraction. “You wrote a song?”

  I nod, smiling at her. “I know it’s not much, but—”

  She tackles me in a hug, holding me close to her. “Will, it’s everything.”

  Wrapping my arms around her waist, I smile into her hair. I breathe in her scent, taking in the familiarity of the raspberry apple lotion she uses, mixed with the green apple shampoo.

  I pull away first, brushing a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. She smiles up at me through her thick lashes, her blue eyes glistening in what light is coming from the lamps around us.

  She takes my hand and I entwine our fingers together. “You don’t usually write songs, and when you do, you never share them. If you wrote me something, then that means everything to me. Really. It’s the perfect birthday present.”

  I can’t help but laugh. “You haven’t even heard it. For all you know, it sucks.”

  We finish making our make-shift bed in the back of my truck, and Ian comes waltzing over. Dylan is already over talking, or flirting, with a group of girls a few cars down.

  Maybe one of them is Kennedy. I don’t know. Can’t say I care.

  “Well doesn’t this look all cozy?” Ian teases, glancing back and forth between us.

  His eyes land on me a little longer than I want.

  Tess shoves his shoulder, but doesn’t say anything.

  I look over at the concession stand, where there isn’t a huge line of people. Reaching into my pocket, I pull out twenty bucks.

  “Why don’t you grab us some stuff before the movie starts?” I suggest, giving her a smile.

  She looks at me with a weird expression on her face. “You willingly want me to leave you alone with Ian?”

  Ian snorts. “Think we’ll murder each other?”

  She shoots him a glare. “I sure as hell hope not, but you never know. Not with you two anyway.”

  I roll my eyes. “I’m not going to do anything. The line just isn’t that long, and I know you’re going to want popcorn and a few other things. I’m being considerate.”

  Passing me her candy, she give me the eye. “Fine, but don’t eat all the candy.”

  “Wouldn’t dream of it,” I muse. “I would hate to see it disappear like the rest did.”

  She sticks her tongue out at me.

  Ian looks between us, an amused smirk on his face.

  Not going to lie, I want to smack it off.

  But Tess wants us to play nice. She told me there’s nothing between them. I’m willing to let old feelings rest. It’s been a long time since I could look at him without wanting to match the black eye I gave him three years ago.

  Tess walks away, leaving Ian and I alone.

  Ian steals a piece of candy from the bag. I don’t stop him. I figure, it’s his funeral. If he doesn’t think she’s counted these, he’s an idiot.

  “So you going to give me the talk, or finally end this stupid war between us?” he questions, leaning against the side of my truck. Unwrapping the chocolate, he pops it into his mouth.

  Ian Wells, ladies and gentlemen. Right to the point.

  “She told me there’s nothing between you.”

  “I could have told you that.”

  I shrug. “I wouldn’t have believed you.”

  “No shit,” he muses sarcastically. “So does that mean you’re going to stop cocking your leg every time we’re both around Tessa? No need to mark your territory, bro. She’s always been yours.”

  It’s a bad analogy, but the picture is clear.

  Was I still threatened by him? Yeah.

  He was competition in one way or another. He’d always be annoying and arrogant, cocky and overconfident. Everything I’m not. He’s always somebody Tess will look up to.

  And that … that pisses me off.

  “Yeah, something like that,” I mutter. “And, for the record, I’m not your bro. I’m still pissed at you.”

  He goes to take another piece of candy, but Tessa is suddenly there smacking his hand away. It makes me laugh, especially seeing the murderous expression on her face.

  She’s cute when she’s angry.

  Like a kitten with its tiny claws out.

  She’s holding a bucket of popcorn, which looks like it’s glistening with butter. Extra butter, if I know her as well as I think I do. Under her arms are two bottles of water, a packet of Twizzlers, and a bag of Swedish Fish.

  She tosses the Twizzlers to Ian, who grabs them greedily. To my surprise, she hands me back my twenty dollars.

  I give her a look. “You didn’t spend any of your own money, did you? Tonight is on me.”

  She grins. “Actually, no.” She turns to Ian. “The girl at concessions told me it’s on the house if I got Ian Wells to go over and sign a few autographs and take pictures.”

  His eyes light up as he bites into a Twizzler, a smirk tipping up half his mouth. “Is she hot?”

  Tessa’s smile wavers, like she’s trying to hold in laughter. “Oh, yeah. I’m sure she’s a real fire-starter in the bedroom.”

  Ian and I both look over at concessions, and I see why she’s trying so hard to keep her composure.

  Ian frowns just as I burst out laughing. Tessa soon joins in, until we’re almost doubled over with our popcorn all over the ground.

  Because standing behind the concession booth is Mrs. O’Reilly. A sixty-something-year-old woman who is known to be the town cougar.

  I let out a loud snort, trying to catch my breath.

  Ian grumbles something under his breath.

  I slap him on his shoulder. “You better get over there. Wouldn’t want to keep your biggest fan waiting.”

  I think he mutters, “Oldest fan,” as he trudges over, giving Tessa a narrow glare as he passes her.

  “That was good.” After helping her up into the truck, I pass her the popcorn once she’s settled in. She sets it beside her, along with our drinks and candy, and waits until I’m settled in the spot next to her.

  There isn’t much room on the bed, but it’s comfortable. I notice how she cuddles in
to the blankets, tugging one over her legs as she fiddles with her water.

  “Comfortable?” I ask, popping some popcorn into my mouth.

  She gives me a small smile. “Yeah. You?”

  I contemplate telling her no—to readjust so we’re closer and touching. But I don’t push my luck.

  “Yeah,” I tell her quietly. “Happy birthday, Tess.”

  Her smile melts into a puddle of warmth.

  “I still think you have an awful choice in movies,” I add once the previews are starting.

  She shoves me, giggling. “You know you love Ghostbusters. Don’t forget I was there when you considered buying the T-shirt with the Staypuff Marshmallow Man.”

  And just like that, we were back.

  Will and Tessa.

  Two halves of a whole idiot.

  Throughout the movie, our hands would brush as we reach for popcorn. Our arms would brush whenever either of us shifted. When a breeze would blow she would move closer to me until my arm was around her shoulder hugging her into me. She cuddled into my side, her hand going to my chest. I tugged the blanket up over us, tucking it around her so she was bundled up.

  I don’t remove my arm from around her, it feels natural where it is.

  Her head rests on my chest, using her hand as a pillow. I lean my chin on the top of her head, trying to watch the movie. It’s hard when she’s this close, like she was during our movie night at my house.

  And it’s not until the night sky darkens the field, and the stars blanket the blackness that I realize … Ian never came back.

  I look over, seeing him hanging with Dylan a few cars down.

  Once he sees me, I swear he winks.

  Maybe he isn’t so bad after all.

  When the first movie is over, it’s after nine o’clock. Our popcorn is long gone, along with the candy we brought. Tess stifles a yawn, melting her body into me. My arm is asleep, still resting on her shoulder. I don’t mind though, because this is where I want to be.

  The sound of her phone beeping next to her turns her attention from the opening of the second movie. I keep watching as she reaches for it, but when her entire body stiffens next to me, I can’t help but look at her.

  “What’s wrong?” I whisper, squeezing her shoulder.

  She doesn’t even look like she’s breathing.

  “Tess?”

  She stares at the screen, but her eyes seem a million miles away.

  “You’re worrying me,” I plead, pulling away. I scoot over, so I can see her fully.

  She blinks, her eyes completely hollow. “I’m fine …” She doesn’t sound convincing enough, so I tilt her head so I can see her eyes.

  “Please don’t lie to me.”

  As soon as our eyes lock, her lip quivers. “I-I don’t want to be broken anymore, Will.”

  I don’t want to be broken anymore.

  The truest words ever spoken.

  Words never spoken out loud before.

  The message I got on my phone was from a dating app I signed up for ages ago. One that I forgot I even had a profile to. I signed up freshman year when I decided that I needed to get out and try meeting people. It seemed like no matter what I did to talk to people face-to-face, it never worked.

  The profile picture to the guy who messaged me seemed eerily familiar to the boy who broke into my freshman dorm. Same blond hair. Same beady brown eyes.

  It stopped my heart. My breath. Everything.

  For mere seconds, the world stopped spinning. Will disappeared from beside me, and the noise of the movie drowned out. It was deafening, being trapped in the possibility that the very boy who destroyed me two years ago was suddenly back in my life.

  But the longer I stared at his picture, the more I realized it wasn’t him.

  The hair and eye color was similar, hell his features were, too. But it wasn’t him. His skin tone was slightly different, his ears slightly bigger. It was the little things that differentiated him from my attacker.

  The boy who tried raping me.

  Rape.

  I hate the word, just like I hate the word victim. I was a victim, but I didn’t want to be one. The campus police called me one. The town police called me one. I called me one. Not anymore.

  For two years I spent every single day pushing away memories from that night, but they resurfaced anyway. For two years I jumped around guys. I made excuses as to why I couldn’t date. I put my life on hold, my feelings on hold, just because of one guy.

  In less than twenty seconds, that night hit me all over again stronger than it ever had.

  It tore me in half. Split my heart in two.

  One guy can completely change your life. Shatter you. Break you.

  And I let him.

  Staring at one picture reminded me of the person I’ve been trying to change, but never found the reason to. Why? My attacker was expelled from school. Arrested. Locked up. Yet I feared him. Feared all men. Feared intimacy. Feared happiness.

  I even feared Will for a short time, maybe even longer than I thought.

  After all, I told myself not to go after him, to even try, because of one guy.

  One experience.

  One night.

  My apartment feels ten times smaller somehow tonight. We left the second movie early, as soon as I told him I didn’t want to be broken. We packed up the truck in silence, and he drove us to my apartment. Not to my parents, or his parents, but to somewhere quiet. Where we could talk. Where I could finally, finally, open up to him. To someone.

  When we entered the tiny studio, I turned on the lights seeing my alarm clock’s red numbers flashing 10:46 p.m. on the screen. I took deep breathes with every step, summoning the courage to tell him everything. Not just about that night. Not just about that text. How I felt. Feel. How my emotions are a jumbled mess.

  Will sits next to me in bed. He’s a short distance away, only because my full size mattress doesn’t offer much room for the two of us. I put my face in my hands for a split second, letting my hair cascade down around me like a shield of protection. But I don’t need protection from Will.

  Straightening up, I move my hair out of my face. “I’m going to tell you everything, because it feels like I might combust if I don’t get this out of my chest. But it’s … it’s hard, because I don’t know how you’re going to react.”

  I will myself to meet his gaze, watching uneasily as he studies my face. His eyes are yearning to know the truth. The words that are about to be spoken.

  “We can …” I take a deep breath. “Can you stay? Can you promise that you’ll stay?”

  He doesn’t hesitate. “Of course.”

  “Can we get ready for bed first? I just need a minute to collect myself.” I swallow past the lump in my throat that’s begging me to spill. “If that’s okay?”

  “Anything, Tess. Do anything you need.”

  It doesn’t take long to wash off my makeup and change into my pajamas, all while Will is getting ready outside the bathroom.

  I stare myself in the mirror, a fire in my eyes that I haven’t seen in a long time.

  Determination. A realization that begs to be spoken.

  A truth that demands to be heard.

  It’s time.

  We lay side by side in bed, both of us in minimal clothes. I’m only wearing a ratty old T-shirt that I double as a night dress since it goes almost to my knees. He’s in his boxers and T-shirt, since he doesn’t have any pajamas here.

  He lives down the hall. He could go home. He could change into pajamas. But he doesn’t. He stays as is, because he promised to stay.

  I shift closer to him, only the ghost of exhaustion stinging my body. I’m too wired, like adrenaline is racing through my body. I can feel the warmth radiate from him. His body calling to mine.

  His hand grazes mine. I gulp.

  He turns on his side, his eyes illuminating in what little light is available from the small lamp on my nightstand. His skin appears tanner in this lighting. Smoother. Yet his
expression is rough. Hard. Tentative.

  I force myself to breathe evenly.

  Closing my eyes, just for a moment, I squeeze my hand. “This kind of goes back, Will. Back a while. For you to understand what happened tonight, you need to understand what a wreck I’ve been.” When he nods for me to continue, I begin. “I’ve always … I’ve always wanted this.” The words come out thick, hesitant—like I’m not sure I want to admit it, but know that it needs to be said. I gesture to my hands, our hands.

  I took a deep breath, flooding my lungs with the courage I needed to continue. Opening my eyes fully, I looked at him. Seeing through his hard exterior. “Even back in high school. But you were with Sheri, and it never seemed like the right time to tell you. I had a crush on you that I ignored, because you seemed happy being just friends. But I never really was.”

  His grip on me tightened, encouraging me to go on.

  I moved closer. “What I did with Ian isn’t something I regret. I really thought I had to do it to move on. Like it was what I needed. Obviously, I was wrong.” I laugh at myself, but it comes out quiet. “I always wanted it to be with you.”

  I could see his body still. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that. Maybe some things are meant to be kept to yourself.

  No, I argue with myself. He needs to hear this.

  “There were so many times I wanted to tell you, Will. But none of them were right. Everything got in the way, and feelings got jumbled. But then … that night happened.” My voice cracks. “I know it’s not my fault. Not really. But part of it is. It all happened because I upset Becky, and the rumors she started …”

  God, all the rumors.

  College was supposed to be different than high school. No drama. No bullshit. Just a fresh start to better opportunities. Will and I decided to live in the dorms, but we were placed on different floors than each other.

  My nerves of being randomly placed with a stranger made me act out to find somebody before selection happened. The Facebook group for incoming freshman had plenty of people to choose from, and I chose almost instantly after a two second conversation.

  I rushed it. I trusted her before I should have.

  And we weren’t compatible, not like we thought we would be. We were polar opposites. Her being a social butterfly—a total extrovert to my introvert. She wanted everything in the room clean and spotless. She wanted rules. Soon, I began to see that it was her way or no way.