I was shaking with shock and my voice came out too shrill, ‘What shall we do?’ I asked. ‘We can’t just leave him here.’
‘Sit a moment,’ Cutch said, ‘whilst I think.’
My legs were weak, I almost fell down. I watched as Cutch dragged the boy by the armpits to the side of the road. There was a dark wet patch on the road that I could not help but look at, like the tongue finding an ulcer, my eyes kept being drawn there. He was someone’s son, I realised. Yet I’d seen his soul depart with my own eyes. Nausea rose in my throat.
‘That’s it,’ Cutch said. ‘It’s all we can—’
A tremor on the ground. I strained to hear, but my ears had been deafened by the shots. ‘Can you hear anything?’ I said, scrambling to my feet.
‘Horses,’ Cutch said. ‘More than one. Quick, we’ve got to get out of here.’ He ran for the cover of the trees where he’d tethered his horse. My legs were like straw, would not work to my command. I ran for Blaze, who was grazing distractedly, a little way up the road, with the horse belonging to the dead boy. Blaze was pulling up hurried mouthfuls with his teeth. I reached for him but he skittered away.
‘Here, come,’ I entreated. But he ignored my desperately reaching hands.
Round the corner came four horsemen, cantering. I dare not stay, I ran into the woods. The two at the front were unmistakeable. Constable Mallinson and Jacob. I’d know them anywhere. I stumbled away from the road. I could not explain why I was dressed in men’s clothes, why there was still the smell of smoke on the muzzle of my gun. I pushed the gun into my belt, leapt into the forest, running as fast as I could.
Shouts behind me. They had found the body. ‘Fetch the horses,’ Mallinson’s voice.
‘Where’s the other rider?’ another voice said.
I tried to move silently, creeping on the soft leaf-fall, taking care not to step on a twig.
Behind me I thought I heard my own name, but my heart was beating so loud in my chest I could not be certain. A branch knocked off my hat. I lurched back to retrieve it. My hair. No one must see my hair. I jammed it on, and crept forward through the trees.
A flash of tan and white. I let out a gasp and stumbled.
Just a startled fox. It ran for cover. But I’d made a sound, and they’d heard it.
‘Hey!’ A shout from behind. ‘Over there!’
I pelted through the trees, uncaring now if anyone heard me. Panicked I dared a glance over my shoulder. A figure was weaving through the trees after me.
‘Stop! Or I’ll shoot.’ Jacob shouted.
Over a tree root. Round a large oak. Heart thumping like the knock of the devil. Where next? There, where the trees are thickest. No hiding place. He was gaining on me. Don’t stop. Think of Ralph.
He was right behind me, I could almost feel the thud of his boots. From tree to tree. Run. Give him no clear place to shoot.
The edge of the woods came upon me with no warning. I burst out, like a pheasant from its cover. Breathe. I couldn’t breathe. Legs like lead. The open road, with fields either side. Nowhere to hide. I hesitated.
The ditch. The voice was clear as a bell in my head.
I did not have to decide, I threw myself into the ditch, under the shadow of the trees.
I lay motionless, the blood beating in my ears. The water seeped cold fingers into my clothes. I buried my face under my cloak, dragged grass and weed to cover as best I could.
I heard Jacob’s boots land on the hard, packed earth and his breath rasp in his throat. Silence. I imagined him searching the landscape for any sign of movement. I dare not inhale. I sipped in air then held it.
A crunch of stones as he swivelled. His footsteps moved closer. Please God, don’t let him see me.
A shout from the woods. ‘Jacob?’
‘Coming.’ The footsteps moved away up the road, I let my breath out slowly.
‘Anything?’ Constable Mallinson, panting.
‘Bastard got away. Lost him in the woods somewhere.’
‘Found Katherine Fanshawe’s horse wandering the road, but no sign of her.’
‘Are you sure?’ Jacob asked.
‘I’d recognise it anywhere. Downall’s got it on a leading rein. Maybe the highwayman’s finished her too. Would solve a barrel load of problems if he had.’
‘Don’t, father.’
‘Just saying, that’s all.’ The voices wound their way into the woods, drifting away from me.
So they wished me dead, did they? The cold seeped into my heart just as the water was seeping into my clothes. I waited until there was total silence before I sat up. I heaved myself to my feet, keeping to the edge of the road out of sight.
I had walked about a mile when I heard another horse. My heart sank. My powder would be wet and my gun useless. I had only a knife to protect me. I lay down on the verge in the shadow of a hedge.
Only when the horse was nearer did I recognise it.
‘Cutch!’ I hissed, still unwilling to make a noise. He turned; saw me. ‘Get me out of here,’ I said, in no mood to tarry.
‘An “if you please” would be nice.’
But I was already climbing pillion behind him. I sat side-on, my hands around his waist.
He looked over his shoulder. ‘When you and Blaze didn’t appear, I was worried. I thought I’d better come back for you, in case…’
His eyes told me that he knew what I had been unwilling to admit to myself for all these months. ‘There’s nothing the matter with me,’ I snapped.
My tone made him kick his horse on, but we still rode slowly back to the manor.
No lights were showing, so I guessed all the servants, including Abi, were in bed. He helped me down. I was shivering now with cold, for my clothes were sodden. The stink of the ditch hung in my nostrils. I was exhausted. A voice in the back of my head was telling me I had gone too far, that I just wanted to curl up somewhere safe and warm.
‘Are you sure you’ll be all right?’
‘Just don’t tell anyone,’ I said. And it wasn’t the highway robbery I meant.
14: The Quickening
The next day I slept late. My body seemed sluggish, my stomach churned. I felt unlike myself, so much so that I could not bear to get out of bed. My back ached like the devil. I must have dozed because next thing, Abi was shaking me awake.
‘Where’ve you been?’
I was still groggy. ‘Nowhere,’ I mumbled.
‘You and Cutch weren’t in your beds last night when I came up, and I searched everywhere. I was worried to death. I waited till gone midnight.’
I did not answer; just slid out of bed and reached out with my toes for my wool slippers.
‘Kate, it’s too dangerous,’ Abi said. ‘Forget the debt to the Diggers. Highway thieving isn’t the answer. Aren’t we in enough trouble—’ Her hand clapped over her mouth as I stood up in my thin cotton nightdress. She looked me up and down as if she had never seen me before. Her face was stricken, as if with amazement.
‘What?’ I said. ‘What are you looking at?’
‘Your belly. We have had scarce any food these last months, yet still your belly is swollen.’
I looked down at my belly, rounded under my nightgown. Her words brought me up short. I placed my hands on my stomach as if to protect it.
‘Your breasts too, they are heavier.’
‘No they’re not.’ I said the words, although they sounded thick, like they were glued to my mouth. I hunched my shoulders, trying to look smaller. I already knew what she would say.
‘And you’ve been riding, like a madwoman.’ Her eyes widened, then narrowed into accusation. ‘In this condition! You fool. Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘I was going to. I just wasn’t sure…’
‘A child. And you thought I would never notice? This changes everything. And Thomas missing. Doesn’t he know you’re having his babe?’
I shook my head. ‘Not Thomas’s,’ I said.
Abi’s eyes widened, her voice came out as a wh
isper. ‘Whose then, Kate?’
I rubbed my hands over the swelling. It seemed impossible there could be another living thing in there. I looked up. ‘Ralph’s,’ I said.
‘Are you sure? Could it not be—?’
‘No.’ I bit off her question with my reply. ‘I have never… not with Thomas.’
‘But when did you… I mean—’
‘The night of the rebellion.’
‘Lord have mercy.’ Abi slumped down on the end of the bed, and pulled at her apron with her hands. ‘I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.’ She shot me an accusing look. ‘Who else knows?’
‘I noticed the changes, but I don’t know… I guess I did not think it could happen to me. I don’t feel old enough… I mean, I still can’t take it in.’
Abi was already counting on her fingers. ‘The night of the rebellion…that’s five months! Kate, you’re five moons grown already! And you, still riding out!’
‘I feel fine.’
Abi did not hear me. She could not take her eyes from my stomach. ‘That means the baby will come in May. And then what will you do?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘If it’s not Thomas’s, what will your stepfather do if he finds out? Adultery, it’s a sin for a woman. It will be the death penalty, or transportation.’
‘Then he mustn’t find out.’
‘But he’ll be back, soon as he finds Thomas. Even if he doesn’t.’ She backed away, as if she wanted to put distance between us.
I couldn’t take it in. Nothing seemed real. But a part of me was rising up in jubilation. ‘Aren’t you pleased for me? Ralph’s child. He will be your nephew.’
‘I’m not ready to be an aunt.’
‘It’s a gift! So much sadness, yet Ralph will live on in his child. Come here, give me your hand, I want you to feel where the babe lies.’
I took hold of her hand and pressed it to my stomach. ‘I can’t feel anything,’ she said, pulling her hand away. ‘Maybe it’s some other disease of the stomach. Maybe you’re not having a baby after all.’
‘No. I know what my body tells me. I just thought it might… that it might go away.’
‘You haven’t tried to—’
‘No. Don’t say things like that. Don’t even think it.’
Abi’s face was white, as if the blood had drained away. Suddenly I feared for my child with a visceral terror.
I grabbed her by the arm. ‘Swear to me you will tell no one.’
She stood and backed away from me. ‘Truth will out, Kate. How can it not?’
‘You will not tell a soul. Swear on the Bible. It’s Ralph’s baby, your brother’s child, Abi. Is it not a wonder?’
‘It’s a disaster,’ she said.
15: An Investigation
It was real. The vomiting, the strange flutterings, they had all been signs. I was a woman, and hadn’t even known. Ralph had taken over my body, just as he’d taken over my thoughts. Was this what he was trying to tell me? Sometimes I thought I could feel him watching me. It was too late anyway, to wish it otherwise. The baby kicked, as if it wanted to be heard. Already I could not imagine the feeling of not having Ralph’s child inside me.
Abi laced me tightly to hide the bump because Downall was obliged to show around some more prospective buyers that had ridden from Oxford. I kept to my chambers, glad he was busy. I was dreading him challenging me about my riding out dressed as a man.
This time the prospective buyers were an elderly couple, accompanied by an impressively dressed footman and lady’s maid. But true to form, as they toured the yard, my impression of Downall’s demeanour as I watched them from the window was that they would not be buying. Not if he had his way.
As soon as they had gone I heard the doorbell clang again and male voices in the hall. Anxious, I brushed down my skirts and went down.
‘Ah, there you are,’ Downall said. The knowing look on his face made my mouth dry. ‘The constable and his son have some questions for you.’
‘Pray be seated. This might take a little time.’ Constable Mallinson said. How stiff and self-satisfied Jacob looked, in his neat white cravat and immaculate twill breeches.
I turned to Downall with questions in my eyes but he avoided my gaze.
‘We found your horse on the London road,’ Constable Mallinson said. ‘Last night. Running loose. It was only later we noticed that it was carrying a man’s saddle. Did you lend your horse to anyone Mistress Fanshawe?’
I knew I had to keep my wits about me. ‘No,’ I said carefully. ‘No one.’
‘Then what was he doing loose on the road?’
‘I’ve no idea. Perhaps he escaped my stable boy?’
‘Cutch, isn’t it?’ Jacob said, with distaste. ‘We will talk to him later.’ Jacob had never liked Cutch. He used to be jealous of Ralph’s friendship with him. It did not bode well. And the fact they were questioning me like this made me as alert as a hunted deer.
Constable Mallinson turned to me. ‘So you did not go out last night?’
I hesitated, searching for the right answer, but before I could utter a word, Downall interrupted my thoughts.
‘Lady Katherine was at home all night, Matthew.’ He smiled at Constable Mallinson. ‘I can vouch for her. I was here with her. Until late.’
I turned to look at Downall in astonishment, but he had deliberately turned away. What was he playing at? He hadn’t been here at all. Worst of all, I did not want to be rescued by him.
‘Are you sure, Jack?’ Constable Mallinson asked, ‘Because Jacob says he saw someone riding her ladyship’s horse.’
‘I couldn’t be certain,’ Jacob said. ‘It looked like a man, but—’
‘A man,’ Downall seized on the word. ‘Could have been our groom, I suppose. But I told you, the Lady Katherine did not go out all evening.’
Jacob was staring at me, and I hoped he could not see how I was shaking inside. He knew that I had attempted highway robbery before, a little more than a year ago. Ralph had told him, and in those days Jacob had been admiring, almost worshipful of my daring. But these last few months Jacob had changed, become bound in by convention, by the law. Would he tell his father? My hands grew slippery with sweat. I stood, and stroked my palms down my skirts. I could not afford to be arrested. What would happen to my baby if I was?
‘Then you have heard nothing yet of the murder of a young man on the road – the brewer’s apprentice, Will Pierce?’ asked Constable Mallinson.
‘I know no one of that name,’ I said. Though my thoughts could not help but drift to the image of the man’s soul drifting up into the sky and dissipating like mist.
‘He’s the cousin of the Sopers who own the hiring yard,’ Jacob said.
‘So? Half the village are cousins of the Sopers,’ I said.
Constable Mallinson took a step nearer and pinned me with his eyes. ‘Ned Soper says maybe he wasn’t killed for his purse. Strange how the highway thief seems to target those who are most outspoken for Parliament. Soper says Will Pierce had no purse worth stealing, but he was ever railing against the King. Soper thinks it could be personal.’
He was implying the Sopers and I had history. My stays were so tight it made me breathless. I fought to stay calm.
Downall muscled his way between us. ‘Now come on, Matthew, you know me for an honest man. I can assure you that we at the manor know nothing of any of this.’ A few more persuasive words followed from Downall, and with each assurance, instead of relief I became more uneasy.
‘Gentlemen, if that was all you came for, then I’m afraid we can’t help. Sad for the young man, of course, but I’m afraid we’re rather busy, so if you wouldn’t mind…’ Downall stood and with a gesture of his arms indicated that they should leave. I inwardly resisted Downall’s use of the word ‘we’, but could do nothing about it.
Jacob looked disgruntled, but Downall had swiftly changed the subject. He was talking pleasantly to Mallinson of how his men were about to dam the river and flood the fie
lds to irrigate them, all the while surreptitiously shepherding them both towards the door. The two men progressed to the hall and I made to follow them, until a hand took me firmly by the sleeve.
I turned. Jacob towered a good foot above me. ‘You know something of this, I’d swear it on my father’s life,’ Jacob said.
‘Leave it, Jacob. I know nothing.’
His eyes bored into mine. ‘I know what you did in the past. That you turned highwaywoman. Ralph told me.’
‘Those days are over, or had you not noticed? Ralph’s dead. Why would I want to murder anyone? I’ve seen enough bloodshed.’
Jacob took me by the shoulders. His fingers dug into my collarbone. ‘Take care, Kate. You may protest, but I feel it in my bones. You’re hiding something. And it’s my duty as assistant to my father to make sure the law is obeyed.’
I was hiding so much, the baby, my pact to pay the Diggers, but still I tried to laugh it off. ‘Such pomposity! Where did that come from Jacob? Where is the sweet youth that used to sit on the hay wagon with Ralph and Abi for the meetings of the Diggers?’
‘Don’t talk to me of the Diggers. I was a youth. I’ve outgrown that nonsense now.’
‘And Abi? What about her?’
A red stain crept up his cheek. He had the grace to look embarrassed. ‘She surely doesn’t expect—’
‘Jacob!’ Constable Mallinson appeared at the door. ‘You’re supposed to be interviewing that Cutch fellow.’
‘Coming, Father.’ He shot out of the door.
Poor Cutch. I could not warn him. Of course he couldn’t have known that Downall had given me an alibi. I prayed Cutch would say nothing, but I followed Jacob towards the stables, intent on conveying a silent warning to Cutch. Halfway across the yard I was intercepted by the looming figure of Downall. He stepped in front of me, barring my path, a righteous expression on his face.
‘Robbery’s a sin. Thou shalt not steal, says the good book, as you well know. So if you value your freedom,’ he said, his mouth twisting into a false smile, ‘you’d best come within.’
Lady of the Highway Page 10