What Love Has Lost

by McCalester, Mindy

  I know that Nathan came back to my life because he wants to set things right. All I want is closure from him! Yes, I got my closure with him, but it seems as if this boy is taunting me while expecting more from me. Well, he's not going to get it. There's no way that he's going to prance his egotistic self into my life and expect us to fall in love again. That's so typical Nathan. He's probably going to tell Grady that he'll be staying at a hotel for a couple of days and then return as he expects forgiveness and kindness from me!

  No, I'm not giving him the satisfaction that he needs! He already took that away from me!

  I bet he will show at my doorstep with a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates. Ha, as if his generous gifts will soften my heart into pieces. As if! I will not fall for his stupid act, again.

  ♠♣♥♦

  Cooped inside my room, I decide to imprison myself and take a stroll outside.

  Before heading outside, I grab my pants, boots, and a thick jacket. I cautiously open my door (it's the middle of the night), I check to see if the coast is clear. I try not to shuffle my feet while leaving (I mostly do that when I'm nervous) and quietly close my door. I grab the house key, just in case, before exiting the room. Sighing in relief, I casually walk into the hallway and out the building.

  I enjoy walking outside in the middle of the night with snow everywhere. The dark, starry skies and the snow actually complement each other. I check my phone to see what time it is. It's only two o'clock. Mm, a Starbucks latte shall brighten my day, but they're closed. Sighing, I ruffle my bangs out of my face and decide to turn back home.

  "Ah, but it's cold outside." I softly sing to myself as I let out a small chuckle. As my head faces the ground, I accidentally bump into someone.

  "Oh, I'm sorry, ma'am." The man says politely. A small smirk comes across his face as my eyes outline his physical feature. I'm somewhat dazzled by his facial features because of his broad jawline with trinkets of hair, which is placed perfectly. My eyes gaze at his luscious, pink lips, which grabs girls' attention. Then, my eyes wonder upwards to his soft, pink cheeks, which are below his gorgeous, dark blue eyes.

  "Are you all right?" the young man asks. I shake my head and let out a forceful laugh.

  "I'm good." I recover. "Look, I'm sorry for running into you in the middle of the night. I just had a rough day and I thought that going outside would be a good remedy."

  The young man rubs the back of his neck and nods. "Well, I just want to know if you're all right. I probably ran into you, roughly." He says, making his voice sound angelic.

  I shake my head. "Again, it's no problem."

  Watching him nodding and smiling, he politely excuses himself. "I should probably head home. I bet my wife is worried."

  He's married?

  "Yeah, I should probably go back inside because my friends are going to be so worried about me." I let out a nervous chuckle. Can anything in my life go right? From the corner of my eye, I watch the nice man return to his house with his wife, children, and possibly a dog. To me, he seems like a dog person.

  Walking into the warm building, I pause at our entrance and swiftly finding the house key. I check every pocket that I have, and I still cannot find the damn key! Oh no, what if I dropped it whenever I bumped into that stranger? Without hesitating, I quickly run outside the building and try finding that exact spot where I left it.

  I keep searching; however, my attempt fails! Almost giving up, I remind myself that we keep a spare key. I know that keeping a spare key is a good back-up plan. I rush towards the front door again as I bend over and find the spare key under the doormat. As my hopes escalade, my luck ends up crashing and burning. Fuck, Nathan has the spare key!

  "Are you looking for this?" a familiar voice echoes through my brain.

  "God?" I ask as my eyes are trying to maintain visual focus towards the mysterious figure, who is standing beside me. The familiar voice laughs. Oh, I know that laugh anywhere from a foot mile radius! "Nathan, I told you to stay away from me."

  "You didn't say that. I just told you want you wanted to hear." Nathan proceeds while my eyes can see a clear view of him. His voice is tantalizing. His facial feature is vividly attractive. Why am I thinking about him in a positive feedback whenever I loathe him?

  "Give me the key!" I command, trying to snatch the damn contraption away from him, but he pulls it back in record time.

  "No can do, sweetheart." Nathan confesses.

  Oh no, where is he going with this?

  Becoming annoyed, I slump onto the wall and slowly slide down as my bottom connects to the wooden, cold floor. "What do you want from me?"

  "Hmm," Nathan pauses as I distinctively watch him pace back and forth in the narrow hallway. "I want you to do everything I say from now on."

  "Hell no!" I protest. I can imagine Nate howling and embarrassing me to this day.

  "Will you let me finish?" Nate questions. While I'm ignoring him, I grab my legs and place them close to my chest. Waiting for Nathan to continue, I still hear his feet pacing back and forth onto the wooden pavement. "I want you to obey my commandments until the day of Rhiannon and Grady's wedding. If you do continue, obeying my orders, then I will completely disappear out of your life."

  To my excitement, this deal catches my attention. "So, you're saying, if I follow your orders correctly, you will leave for good?"

  "I didn't stutter, did I?" he wiggles his eyebrows, from what I can see in this distinct light.

  Welcome back, Nathan Hampton.

  I flick out the fuzz out of my jacket before getting up from the cold floor. Sometimes, I regret on sitting onto the hard floor because my bottom always numbs. I always hate the feeling of having muscles cramping. "Um, can you help me?" I order.

  "Hey, don't change this deal around, Inn." Nathan spats. Overall, this is going to be one hell of a torture from him. God knows what Nathan will come up with stupid needs and such. I'm just praying that I can go through it without any hassle, or pain (whichever is better), and that Nathan can keep his promise by disappearing. He'll be out of my life in no time! Besides, Rhiannon and Grady are getting married in three days after New Year's Day!

  I don't bother arguing with Nathan. If I continue on arguing with him, he won't leave as soon as possible! I hear Nate walk towards the front door and unlock it with the spare key. "Ladies first..."

  Just hope this torture will end very soon!

  ♠♣♥♦

  The next morning, Rhiannon surprises us by blowing a trumpet and waking everyone in the apartment. To my dismay, I fall out of my bed. Sure, I'm clumsy but it's not an everyday routine to hear someone play a loud instrument, early in the morning!

  "What the fuck, Rhi?" I practically yell in Nate's ear, which wakes him up. Geez, he doesn't wake up easily while someone plays a trumpet, but he wakes up when someone shouts in his ear!

  "Wake up, kiddies! We are going on a road trip!" Rhiannon announces, still blowing onto that contraption. Nathan chuckles as he starts ruffling his messy hair. I watch him as he continues ruffling his hair.

  God, when he does that, it is utterly sexy. My teenage hormones are practically screaming at me to kiss him; touch him in any which way. Oh my god, what am I saying?

  "C'mon slow pokes! We need to hurry up before the traffic approaches!" Rhiannon continues with her rampage and storms into every room in the apartment.

  "Uh, do you want to get ready first, or shall I?" Nathan suggests. Moreover, I'm still staring at Nathan as if I'm in love with him or something. "Or do you want to go in there...together?" he whispers the last part in my ear.

  A wave of shock tingles through my entire body. I swear, whatever this boy is doing to me; he is doing an absolutely, fan-fucking-tastic job. He's hypnotizing me with his charm. He's pulling that innocent boy act and wants me to fall in love with him again.

  Do not give him the opportunity to fall for him!

  A small smirk forms onto his egotistic face. He's showing a couple of his pearly whites, bas
king the moment of what he is doing to me. I will make sure that this body, mind, and soul will not surrender to him.

  Chapter Six

  A Partridge and Rhiannon's Family

  There are plenty of ideas in my mind to kill Rhiannon Marie Evers. There are times that I love the girl; however, there are times when I just want to smack a book across her pretty head. Of course, Rhiannon is the one who woke us up, early in the morning, with a damn trumpet. Of course, Rhiannon is the one who drove through the snow at eighty miles per hour, when there is slippery roads. There are slow signs everywhere! Yet, she tends to avoid the conception!

  Now, she stops at a destination where her private jet is. Even though she specifically yelled 'Road Trip' throughout the apartment, this surely does not seem like a road trip to me! Thus, this makes me want to smack Rhiannon across the head some more!

  Have I mentioned that she comes from a wealthy family? Anyways, Rhiannon Evers' great grandfather is the founder of Coco-Cola industries, and her father just so happens to be running the family business. Her brother (yes, I forgot to mention that Rhiannon has two siblings) is working with her father. Rhiannon is the youngest child in the family. She has two older brothers, Reed and Royce Evers.

  Rhiannon slams onto the breaks, making everyone shift forward as we arrive at her private airport. "Goody, we arrived just in time! Aha, I am so ready for all of you to meet my family. Oh, this will be the best weekend for all of us! I cannot wait for you guys to meet them."

  Nathan, Grady, and I look at each other with concern eyes, wondering if Rhiannon has gone too far. Mentioning this before, Rhiannon is a unique person. She's very random and unpredictable - such as myself. However, I cannot be so unpredictable, if someone compares Rhiannon to me.

  Anyways, we watch Rhiannon exit the car and rush towards her private plane. Grady decides to grab the car keys out of the ignition; Nathan and I decide to grab the luggage out of the trunk.

  Rhiannon can get easily excited. She will do anything! Lord, help her; she will do anything. Seriously, she will plan to throw a surprise party, without telling a soul. She will help volunteer at a community or a club, because she has compassion towards helping others. She will volunteer to chaperone a high school dance, even though she's in college.

  "Are you guys coming or what?" she whines while standing onto the steps as she waits for us in the frigid cold. Can one person be so damn lazy because Grady, Nathan, and I are the ones who are actually transporting our things from the car to her plane? I know it sounds mean to discuss about Rhiannon, but sometimes the girl goes to the extreme.

  "Hmm, let's see...Look what we are doing!" I spat.

  Rhiannon groans. "Hurry up!"

  "We're trying!" Nathan, Grady, and I shout, still grabbing our suitcases out of the trunk.

  ♠♣♥♦

  Once we got in the private plane, Grady starts being so fascinated with the utility. We all watch Grady in amazement. First, he starts messing with the captain's radio. Rhiannon warns him to stop messing with the important buttons and such. Knowing Grady, he will listen, but he's being an idiot for playing. Second, he goes to the back and screams that Rhiannon's bathroom looks neat and clean.

  I place a hand onto my chin, looking bored or annoyed.

  "Look, the flusher for this toilet looks totally rad!" Grady exclaims as he continues to become more engrossed with the fancy items in this plane. Suddenly, we hear Grady flushing the toilet numerous of times. Rhiannon complains and tells to him to stop because he might destroy it.

  It amuses me to have friends, such as Rhiannon and Grady.

  From the corner of my eye, I see Nathan either laughing or coughing. I cannot help but form a small smile across my adorable face. No, it does not mean that I have intimate feelings towards him. It just means that Nate can make me smile sometimes, that's all!

  Suddenly, we hear a bell ding throughout the cabin. "This is your captain speaking. We will be flying out of Montgomery, Alabama to Denver, Colorado. The flight will be one hour and forty-five minutes. Smoking is prohibited during the flight. Please, keep your seat belts fasten at all times and enjoy the ride." The captain explains through the intercom.

  Somehow, Grady surprises us. "That was freaking awesome!"

  We all stare at Grady, dumbfounded. Grady comes from a poor family. He has no siblings; therefore, he's the only child in the family. His father is a drug-addict as his mother left him. Throughout high school years, he lives with his mother and her new boyfriend, Glenn. Glenn is a good man to Grady. He treats Grady as if it's his son. Glenn is a police officer, so he works on the late shifts as well.

  Grady's mother struggles with her job. She's an accountant at a local bank.

  In the end, I'm just happy for Grady to find the perfect soul mate. Grady can explain to his children about how he landed on a hot wife or something. I think Grady will become a great father. He has the potential. He's a great guy. He's always there for his friends, when needed the most. He's the guy who will let any girl cry on his shoulder. Grady is the perfect guy for any girl.

  ♠♣♥♦

  "This is your captain speaking: we have landed on Denver airport. Have a great holiday season." The captain announces, and at the same time, wakes me up because anything can wake me up very easily. Yes, I'm a light sleeper. Some people say that I snore, but honestly, I don't snore!

  Slowly rising up from my comfortable spot, my eyes avert to the pillow that I slept on. Yes, I fell asleep on Nate's lap! My eyes widen - due to the fact - I was lying onto his lap the whole time. I'm scarred for the rest of my life! Nay, I'm already scarred for the rest of my life. I'm already sharing a room with a devil, and now, I'm sharing a deal with the devil!

  "Ahem," someone clears his throat as it disrupts me from my rants. I look over and see Nathan stand there before me with worried look in his eyes. "Aren't you coming or are you going to be like Grady, being all fascinated by Rhiannon's family private plane?" Nathan explains.

  I nod my head, vigorously. I slowly walk towards Nate's lean body and proceed to exit out of the plane while Nathan follows. "So, do you think my lap was comfortable for you?" Nathan whispers into my ear. A set of tingles goes through my body, just the same as this morning.

  Goddammit, this boy is so frustrating!

  "Ha, you wish Hampton." I seethe. Nathan's chuckles echoes through my brain as it increases the heart rate inside me. I can sense pebbles of sweat, forming onto my forehead. However, I force myself to make it less noticeable. Moreover, I don't want it to ruin my makeup.

  "Mm, I can sense that you're withering away from the truth and the lies." Nathan continues on whispering as we both stop our tracks, being left behind by Grady and Rhiannon. "Inna, I know you. Stop running away from the truth and tell me that you want me, just as much as I want you." Nathan presses his body against mine.

  This boy is making it more complicated!

  "You're still holding onto our past. You replay those memories that we shared together."

  No, I don't want you, so go away, and leave me alone!

  "Say it," Nathan continues, with his lingering words and hypnosis charms. "Say what you feel towards me. Say that you still love me. Say that you want to be with me. Just say it, and I will leave you alone, for good. If you say those words that I am asking, then I will postpone the deal and keep my commitment to vanish out of your life." Nathan finishes as he waits for an answer.

  Come on, Inna; give the boy what he wants to hear. You want him gone, and he'll vamoose sooner than you know it. If you give him the benefit of the doubt, we'll be even. He gets what he want, and you get what you want. Tell him the truth.

  I inhale, deeply, before proceeding. I turn around and make eye contact with his. "You listen to me, Hampton. You are wrong. I don't grudge against the memories that we shared. I don't love you anymore. I don't want to be with you, no matter how frustrating you are at times. I don't want you. I don't love you. I will never be in love with you, ever again."

  Turning
around, I replay the venom words inside my mind. Of course, they are lies.

  ♠♣♥♦

  How can I be such a coward? I'm in Denver, Colorado, with the most gorgeous place to visit because of their beautiful scenery with the Rocky Mountains, covered in snow. The words that I said to Nathan, yesterday, is very harsh, and I regret it. I regret to this day that I spoke those awful words to him.

  I promise myself that I will not give him the benefit to take control of me. He says that he will postpone the deal and leave me for good. Is that what I want?

  Well, that's what I've wanted in the first place. Now, I'm not so sure. What if he's playing a trick on me? What if he's saying all that, just to make me believe that he will keep his words; yet, he will do the opposite? What if...What if he's telling the truth?

  Ah, snap out of it, Inna!

  Right now, us four with Rhiannon's father and her two brothers are in the living room, catching up with things. Rhiannon and Grady are sitting next to each other, holding hands. Her father sits across from them. Nathan is sitting on one chair, beside me. The two brothers are sitting on each end of their father. Rhiannon continues to brag about the wedding and how she plans it.

  She mentions that I'm helping her with the wedding. She and I pick out the most beautiful décor for the winter wedding. She's also religious. She wants to get married in a Baptist church, where the choir sings, "Here Comes the Bride." She has an imaginary bubble inside that tiny head of hers.

  Her wedding gown is gorgeous. The invitations are beautifully designed as well. Grady and Rhiannon has a tall wedding cake, which is beautiful. Rhiannon says that the wedding cake is Red Velvet. Yum, Red Velvet is my favorite!

  Then, Rhiannon continues to babble about the orchestra and the choir in the wedding. I don't remember that we agreed to hire an orchestra and a choir! Nevertheless, this is Rhiannon's big day, so I won't try to ruin this for her. If this is her moment, then she deserves to be happy. She deserves a moment where a bride has the spotlight for a day. It's a moment that every bride to be cherish.