Heart of a Rebel

by Glenna Maynard

  Apparently, the Undead Bastards killed Rumor because of our affiliation with the Dry Ridge Sinners. When that didn’t end our relationship, they took it upon themselves to take Grim. After he refused them, they grabbed my mother along with Baby and Colt. I don’t know what they did to her and Colt, but whatever it was had to have been gruesome, because both caskets were closed.

  The strangest part of all was Tread was there and swears he didn’t see or hear anything. Says the FEDS come in and raided their heroine stash. The only reason he was cut loose was because of his Black Rebel Riders’ cut. He wasn’t even aware Grim was near.

  The thing that kills me is there is no one to make pay or suffer for whom they have taken from my family.

  The Sinners and the Bastards are out of commission, at least for the time being. They are in federal and there is no getting to them. Grim isn’t talking much, he is eerily quiet.

  I have yet to tell him that Romeo isn’t coming back. Sort of thought he would return to Drag Creek once he received wind of Baby’s death. I know he loved her. I am not sure how Grim will handle the loss of his best friend after losing his children and his grandson.

  My mother has been right by his side since they came home. Cowboy was killed during the showdown and she doesn’t seem to bothered by the fact. I know she has always carried a torch for Grim. I guess it is fitting that they are together.

  Chelle has been my rock through this tragedy. Even though I wish to see her brothers in the ground, I know she is reeling from their arrest. She warned me about their interest in Baby. Romeo was warned too. We left her unprotected and she paid the ultimate price with her life and that of her son, my nephew.

  Grim has told me numerous times that I did all I could but I know I let him down. I let Baby down. I suppose the only decent outcome is that she and Striker are watching over us all along with Colt.

  What kind of sick bastard hurts a child? I watch every day as Chelle’s belly grows. I watch how she mothers Miracle, even though she isn’t ours really, but she is so gentle with her and patient.

  She told me, “It doesn’t matter whether we ever find our way to one another Rebel, what matters is that we take care of her and our son. No matter what, they are going to count on us whether we are lovers or friends.”

  She amazes me to be honest. She knows when to give me hell and when to just let me be, without trying to change me, or force herself into my life. Somehow, she has become my best friend. I never thought I would be saying that, but I am.

  **

  Four months later

  “Oh my fucking God! I hate you Rebel!”

  Ignoring her insults and screams, I wipe the sweat from Chelle’s forehead. She has been in labor now for the past thirteens hours.

  My mother called me late last night telling me to get my ass to the hospital. I haven’t left my woman’s side since I received the call. Grim and I have been working day and night to restore Skull’s scrapyard business. Miracle is with my mom and Grim until the arrival of Axel, okay I want to name him Axel, but Chelle is determined to name him Tommy after my brother, Thomas.

  We are still taking things slow. I have tried to take things to the next level but she keeps insisting it is too fast, maybe she is right, but I am ready to be committed to her and our child. In the back of mind though is the nagging thought—that what if, he isn’t mine. Is that why she holds back and won’t let me close to her?

  She clutches my hand and squeezes it tight as a contraction hits. The doctor said if she doesn’t begin to dilate on her own they will give her medication to help the process.

  “You are doing great,” I whisper in her ear.

  “Thank you,” she says being sweet again.

  All this time I have been insisting on having a DNA test, but now I am so invested in her and this child, I am afraid of what I might do, if the test comes back to say he isn’t my son after all. I even went as far as telling her we didn’t need the test, but she is insisting upon having it. I don’t know if it is to make peace with it herself, or to shove the truth of it in my face, that she never lied to me.

  “Oh God, they are coming closer together now,” she whines turning onto her side slowly.

  “Want me to get the nurse?”

  “I’m here,” a woman says from behind me. “Let’s check and see if you have made any progress.”

  I watch awkwardly as she performs a pelvic exam.

  Removing her glove she says, “Great news, you have made it to seven on your own, it won’t be long now.”

  It isn’t long either within the hour, Axel Thomas Black has made his debut. We compromised on his name. He didn’t cry for a moment when he was born and it was the most terrifying minute of my life.

  As I cradle my son in my arms counting his fingers and toes, I know that nothing will ever be more important to me than keeping him safe. I can’t help but wonder about my nephew Colt and what he would have thought of his cousin.

  “Do you think they are happy?”

  “They would want you to be happy today and to celebrate his birth,” Chelle whispers softly, with a dreamy twinkle in her eyes, as she breastfeeds our boy.

  “I know. I just wish they could be here.” I bend down, kissing the tops of both their heads.

  “Knock, knock,” my mother calls bringing an arrangement of balloons and flowers with her.

  She shoves the gifts in my hands before washing her own. Her face lights up once she has Axel in her embrace. I know she needed this. Losing Colt has crushed her.

  “Miracle wanted to come and see her new brother, but Grim talked her into helping him put up our Christmas tree. I just hope my ornaments survive her curious fingers.”

  One day I will tell Miracle the truth but for now she is a toddler and deserves to be given a happy childhood. Raising her with Chelle as our own was the best choice in the situation. I couldn’t let her go to foster care to live with strangers. The child has had her life turned upside down and been passed around to whomever was available one time too many.

  Having her around has been good for my mother and Grim too. I know she can never take Colt’s place but she is a child in need of their love, and they love giving it to her. I think she is already more spoiled than Baby ever was.

  Somehow, we have been able to pick up the shattered fragments of our lives and go on living and breathing.

  21

  Chelle

  AKA Lil Bit

  Breastfeeding isn’t only great for Axel, but it is great for making Rebel keep his hands to himself. He swears he isn’t just into me because of our son, but I’m not so certain. When I first met him, I thought it was fun to flirt with him. I never really thought he would be into me and I figured it would piss my asshole brothers off, if I got involved with a patched man from another club.

  It was stupid, but then Rebel opened up to me and talked to me as if I was a person and not just a piece of ass. He told me about his wife and how he felt pressured to give her a child, it was weighing heavy on his heart and his mind. One thing lead to another and we had an amazing night together. I never dreamed I would get pregnant; I was on birth control even.

  Axel suckles on my breast eagerly as I rub his baldhead. My breasts are huge, swollen and ache all the time. I never had very large tits until I started gaining my pregnancy weight. I was told breastfeeding is a good way to keep them once you start dropping the extra pounds gained during the nine months.

  I wasn’t lucky enough to only gain weight in my breasts, my ass, and my stomach. I gained allover. I feel as wide as a Mack truck, but Rebel assures me that my curves turn him on.

  Rebel comes over doting on our son. I know he said he didn’t need the paternity test, but I wanted him to know without a doubt he was the father. We received the results a few days ago; the relief Rebel felt reading the results was evident when he kissed me.

  He massages my shoulders with his strong, rough, calloused hands. Bending down, he sweeps my hair from my neck and whispers huskily in my e
ar, “I’m jealous that Axel is the only one getting to enjoy sucking on your nipples. You can only put me off for so long, Chelle Belle, but soon I’ll be the one licking, sucking, and biting on you.” Rebel started calling me that one day and it sort of just stuck.

  His breath tickles my skin, sending a shiver down to my bones. My cheeks are flushed with heat, as my belly grows warm with the thought of him having his way with me. The only problem is I want him to want me for me, not because I gave him a son.

  He wisely moves away as I burp Axel over my shoulder, he has learned to get out of the way. Sometimes Axel spits up, it’s more like projectile vomiting when I have forgotten to give him his stomach medication.

  Rebel once got a face full of baby puke. It was epic. I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes.

  Axel falls asleep quickly and I lay him back in his crib. His father and I stand together watching him sleep peacefully, every few breaths his mouth curves in a smile. He is such a happy baby.

  I lay my head on Rebel’s shoulder and sigh in content. “What you said about my putting you off…Rebel it isn’t that I don’t want you. You know that I am attracted to you. But. I don’t want you with me out of obligation.”

  ‘The only obligation I feel is the need to make you cum on my cock.”

  Fuck, when he says things like that I fall to pieces and find resisting him so damn hard, now that I am past my six-week checkup.

  “Chelle, you are smart, you make me laugh, I enjoy waking up every day knowing I am going to spend part of my day with you and our children.”

  He says children because we are raising Miracle, the daughter of Romeo. Well turns out she wasn’t his but she was his wife’s daughter. She is presumed missing or dead and Romeo felt she would be better off staying with us.

  “And you make my cock so fucking hard when you tilt your head to the side and laugh at me. I love the way my name rolls off your tongue in a purr. So what is it going to take? Want me to marry you, because I will in a heartbeat.”

  “I just want you to love me for me.”

  “I do Chelle, I won’t lie and say you are the only woman I love, we know that isn’t true, you have to share me with Miracle and Foxie. But they kinda like you so it should be good.”

  “Asshole,” I tease tilting my head to the side and laughing. I never knew I did that until he just told me.

  “See.” He takes my hand and places it over his throbbing cock. God, it’s even bigger than I remember. However, it has been over a year since I have had sex.

  Letting go of the temptation in his pants, I stand on my tiptoes to reach his mouth. “Goodnight Rebel.” The words are spoken so close to his mouth I know he can feel the heat of my lips.

  He sucks in a deep breath through his teeth, as I turn to go to my room. Rebel has his own room. I think my room used to belong to Dawn, there is a huge bookcase filled with romance novels in it.

  He grabs my arm with brute force. “You think you are just going to walk away and leave us both feeling unsatisfied. I need to bury my cock deep inside your tight little cunt Chelle.”

  My panties are soaked. I wonder if he knows the effect, his words have on me. The lust-filled tension is so thick in the air I can hardly breathe.

  Swallowing hard I repeat, “good night Rebel.”

  His mouth claims mine in a fiery passion and he consumes me, burning me with his desire. Rebel’s lips are achingly beautiful. His tongue wraps around mine and I melt into him.

  My nursing gown is pulled over my head and left in the floor. Rebel swoops me up with ease, carrying me to his room.

  “Get used to being in my bed, you are going to be sleeping in it from here on out.”

  I can only nod, my lips ae swollen from his torturous kiss. My fingers snake up under his shirt, digging into his fevered back. His perspiration from the heat is under my nails, as they glide back down to his bare ass. His jeans are shoved down to his knees. His firm length rests against my thigh searing my skin it is so fucking hot.

  The heating unit Romeo had put in while this cabin was his is too powerful. This small cabin gets heated up like the inside of a volcano. Rebel rolls off me enough to finish taking his jeans off.

  My lips are pursed wanting to taste his tongue again.

  Now that his jeans are off, he is free to pursue making love to me.

  “You better put on a condom; I can’t start birth control until I have my period.”

  “Fuck no, your pussy is all mine, and I intend to feel every fucking centimeter of it covering my cock as I fuck you.”

  A deep kiss shuts my mouth from protesting the issue further. Our fingers are locked together above my head as he rocks into me. His weight is crushing me but I don’t care, I am floating on cloud nine.

  We roll over awkwardly to our sides changing positions, he is spooning me from behind, as he locks his legs with mine like scissors.

  My pussy clenches feeling him deeper than before. Sharp teeth bite down on my shoulder blade, and then his mouth is grazing, licking and sucking on my neck, as he assaults my clit with a free hand. He is touching me everywhere, tingling all my sensitive spots.

  My ass fits perfectly in the nook of his pelvic bone.

  “Fuck, Chelle Belle I love those little squeaks you make when you respond to my touch.” Pushing against my shoulder, he shoves me over so I am laying on my stomach. “I am going to fuck you hard and fast until you cum for me and when you do I am going to cum all over this tight ass.” His hands clamp down on my ample bottom pinching me roughly with ownership.

  Face down ass up is my current position. Hands clenched gripping the sheets with white knuckles, my fingers ache.

  Hot kisses are planted down my spine. Skillful fingers massage my breasts while the others are fondling my clit. One, two, three times he pumps in me before I become undone. My orgasm takes hold and my eyes roll back in ecstasy.

  “That’s what I like to feel, your pussy tightening against my dick.”

  I squeeze him tight until he can’t hold his release in any longer. Pulling out, his dick jerks against my ass, his cum dripping between my cheeks.

  Rebel’s whole body trembles and shakes against mine as he collapses next to me fully sated.

  Part Three

  22

  Karly?

  Four months ago

  “Do I look like a Karly?” I ask Striker, I mean Nash, as I go through the color chart for my hair.

  “About as much as I feel like a Nash.” He laughs.

  “Cole isn’t a big stretch from Colt, so do you think he will even notice the change?” ‘Nash’ and I getting new identities is one thing but our son…I am not sold. I don’t want to confuse him.

  “He’s not so old that it won’t stick, it is subtle enough, he will catch on to it quickly. We’ve been over this Ba-baaabe.” He catches himself.

  “I know. What do you think of this one?” I point to a darker color.

  He shrugs, rolling his tense shoulders. “It’s your hair, do what you want.”

  “Yeah, but you’ll be looking at me all the time.”

  He stares at my hair and the sample comparing the two. “Maybe not quite so dark. Besides I think you are avoiding my question.”

  “I’m not avoiding it; I just don’t think that right now is the best time to talk about it.” Earlier today, he had asked me what happened during our time apart, the weeks he was in the hospital and the weeks I thought, he was dead.

  I want to be upfront about everything, I know I have to for us to stand a real chance at making this work. His reaction to it all is what I am nervous about. I slept with his father and I made out with his brother. He raped me and I lost our child. That isn’t something I can just forget either.

  “I thought it would be best if we discussed it during our therapy session.”

  “Are we seriously doing that?” With his brow arched, he flops down in a chair.

  **

  Therapy Session 1

  “Trust seems to be your great
est hindrance. Would you both agree?”

  We both nod honestly that we do.

  “What is your number one concern Karly?” Dr. Leedham asks tapping his pen against the desk.

  “I am afraid that when I tell him certain things that have occurred while we were split, that he will hurt me again. I—we lost a child because I was selfish and kept the pregnancy a secret among other betrayals and my husband turned to drugs. During that time, Nash raped me. It was what lead to the child’s passing.”

  “Nash how does hearing her concerns make you feel?”

  “Makes me feel like shit knowing I hurt her and that I let an addiction control me and take me away from my family. She fucked up too though.”

  “We are not here to blame and shame, only to make feelings known in a safe and healthy environment.”

  “This is bullshit.” Nash is lashing out because he feels put on the spot. I can see it in his eyes and in his movements. He keeps clasping his hands and getting fidgety.

  “Your anger is good. You are claiming ownership for your actions. Let it out.”

  “You have a punching bag?”

  The doctor laughs but I don’t think he is joking.

  “Maybe a day at a gym.” Dr. Leedham suggests.

  Therapy Session 2

  “Just answer the question! Did you fuck my brother?” My husband shouts at me with his fists clenched by his sides.

  After our last session Stri—Nash got a gym membership. It has provided a healthy outlet for him. He still has a lot of anger to get out though.

  “No, I didn’t. I told you…he kissed me that was it. I know it isn’t any better but I was there for him emotionally. We were grieving. I wasn’t trying to hurt you; I was trying to get over you. I thought you were dead!”

  “A few kisses,” he mutters more to himself but I can see he is taking it in. His jaw is more relaxed and his hands are open lying on his thighs now. “But you did fuck Romeo numerous times,” he states his hands balling up again.