by Sol Crafter, Diana Sheridan, Talya Andor, Lacie J. Archer, Angel Propps
She laughed, but it was kind of true. And he started to see it when he looked for it.
Jim wasn't just James "Jim" Sheppard, he was "Jim Sheppard" with a handful of capital letters in there and neon lights and glitter and sweaty girls throwing panties at him while he rocked out on the stage. It was daunting for Marty to realize just how big a deal Jim was.
Jim was the same as always, but it was as though Marty were seeing the way other people treated him for the first time. And while Jim was always polite, there were times when it definitely showed that he would much rather be treated as just another person. So Marty started stepping in to smooth things over, knowing that out of the two of them, he was the one with the craziest amount of self-confidence.
Which made him realize that it meant a lot to Jim to be on a fun show like Centrifical. So Marty went out of his way to make sure Jim enjoyed himself as much as possible. In the process, he ended up having a great time too. The episode ended up being one of the best they'd ever had, at least from what he could see when Jason lined up a viewing for him and Jim.
He slouched on the beanbag-like leather couch next to Jim and watched the episode "5.05: Korlaax' Folly" and couldn't help laughing.
He very rarely watched his own episodes because it seemed a little creepy and he always got the sense that it wasn't him on the screen. But he had to admit that he was a better actor than he'd ever given himself credit for. Especially when Jim appeared on screen as the wandering space minstrel "Val'a'tua N'ea'shat'tal'zanadun," the amount of apostrophe's in his name one of the jokes. Korlaax acted like he had a stick up his ass and brought out his snarkiest attitude and almost destroyed the universe in the process.
Jim was laughing so hard next to him that he had to wipe his eyes with his sleeve. "Ah, those sighing fangirls and boys get me every time."
While Korlaax spent nearly the entire episode being a dick, everybody else on the show fell madly in love with the space minstrel and acted like a bunch of gushing teenagers around him. As the show progressed, they got more and more crazy over him until, by the end, even strict Captain Vang was wearing love beads and a tee shirt with Val'a'tua's face on the front while he made cow-eyes every time Jim appeared. It was funny how right in the middle of a serious lecture about station safety, Val'a'tua walked on screen and Vang's expression congealed into one of dumbstruck adoration and his tone changed in mid-word into fawning praise.
Marty couldn't resist humming along when Val'a'tua sang the catchy tune he was using to bespell everyone and caught Jim looking at him out of the corner of his eye. He shrugged. "Sorry, but it's like worms burrowing into my brain."
Jim laughed. "My first pop hit." It had been written by Jason himself and really was a good song, especially when it was sung by someone as talented as Jim.
"It could end up being a big hit," Jason said. He was sitting on a folding chair next to the couch and looked really pleased with himself and the world in general. "I'm glad you were willing to sing a song for the show."
Jason hadn't even wanted to ask Jim to sing, sure that it was going to make his paycheck way too much for such a small show to afford, but Jim had just laughed. He'd insisted on being paid the same amount that an average guest actor would receive and had offered to sing a song because "Hey, it's about the only thing I'm really good at. I don't know if you know this, but I'm kind of known for singing and not much else."
For Centrifical to have the lead singer of Blue-Eyed Suns guest star on their show and even sing, it would be a punch toward making serious ratings. There was a good chance that they would be making an appearance at the People's Choice Awards and that was all because of Jim.
Marty looked at Jim and smiled, watching him talk and laugh with Jason about the show. He only turned away when he was asked a direct question. He let himself be pulled back into the conversation, which had somehow drifted to whether Centrifical was going to have a spot at Comic Con—they were. It was so relaxed, Jason went to his mini-fridge and pulled out a bottle of vodka out and a bottle of ruby red grapefruit juice. He was careless with the mixing and a little juice splashed on the table, but he just kept right on talking. There was something oddly fascinating about getting Jason Bower on a roll. He could talk about anything and everything and make it sound interesting through facial expressions and tone of voice alone.
Marty and Jim sat listening to Jason for longer than they probably should have, considering they were sipping alcohol and nibbling on Cheetos. It was nice though, to just sit around listening to someone who loved to talk. All they had to do was toss out a couple of questions here and there and Jason kept on going. It was fun.
By the time they left, Marty was unsteady on his feet and Jim was doing that stoic, slightly quizzical thing with his face that only happened after he'd been drinking. It seemed pretty natural that they would walk with their arms around each other's shoulders down the middle of the hallway, not really holding each other up, but just sharing a friendly hug. It seemed perfectly right and they were laughing and talking loudly and Antonio was a step ahead of them, keeping an eye out as he led them out of the building.
They were approaching an open doorway when someone stepped out, a girl wearing a black beret, which was actually pretty weird. Marty couldn't think of a single time he'd seen someone wear one in real life, not off the top of his head. Yet there she was; her beret at a jaunty angle on her hair. She was wearing a close-fitting blue sweater that made her large breasts look larger and makeup that was very dramatic looking, much too extreme for daytime wear. She was very pretty and that made up for a lot of the fashion faux pas. Trying to look like a 1950s-era Lois Lane was not the kind of thing she should have gone for.
He was so in his own world that he was surprised when she saw the two of them together and her eyes practically popped out of her head. She looked like she was about to blow a blood vessel in her brain.
"I can't believe you're here like this," she gushed, and she was mostly looking at Jim, but Marty was included with a lightning glance. "Is there any way I can get a picture?"
Jim looked at Marty with a "Well?" and he looked so completely laid back that Marty couldn't help shrugging. He didn't really care if their picture was taken or not, and the girl looked so ecstatic that he couldn't help giving a real smile.
Standing with his arm over Jim's shoulder, both wearing rather inebriated smiles, they got their picture taken by the star struck girl before Antonio hustled them away. Somehow, he managed to get them in the back of the car and he drove away from the lot with easy skill.
Leaning his suddenly heavy head against the window, Marty managed to twist himself around in his seatbelt until he could see Jim. "I'm going to miss you on set. I'm going to have to get used to the way things were before."
"Sorry," Jim said. "It is sad to have it be over."
Marty sighed. "It was really nice being able to see you all the time. I wish it had been for more than just a couple of days."
"Well, to make you feel better, let's get something to eat," Jim said. His teeth were super white in the dimness and his eyes were breathlessly blue. "I feel like Mexican tonight."
"Okay," Marty said and it wasn't like he would just agree to anything those eyes said. Though he probably would.
Jim leaned forward to address Antonio. "Can you take us to Jimenez'?"
Antonio glanced at him through the mirror. "I don't think that either you or Mr. Sheer should be going into a restaurant right now."
Jim laughed. "It's all right. We're totally drunk; I get that. But we can go pick up some food to go and take it back to my place for," he glanced at Marty, "a movie marathon?"
"That sounds good," Marty said.
Jim pulled his phone out of his pocket. "I'll call ahead so they'll have the food ready, then you can just run in and grab it, right?"
Antonio expertly changed lanes. "That does sound better than the two of you going in there."
"Yeah, yeah." Jim's thumb was quick on his phone as he found the number for the restaur
ant. "Do you like enchiladas, Antonio? What do you like to eat?"
Antonio started to say, "You don't have to …" but Jim waved him quiet.
"Just tell me what you like to eat. Jimenez makes the best enchiladas and they have all kind of seafood tacos—shrimp, fish, crab, whatever. It's like they scoop everything up out of the ocean, slather it in tasty sauce, and wrap it with a tortilla."
Marty smiled and closed his eyes, listening to Jim chatter away as he messed around with his phone and the car rushed over the asphalt. A couple of drinks and Jim discovered the gift of gab, while Marty always went quiet and unsteady on his feet. It was like they switched roles and Marty didn't mind.
"Don't go to sleep!" Jim suddenly ordered, jabbing a finger at him.
"I'm not," Marty assured, not opening his eyes. "Besides, you'll wake me up when we get there, won't you?"
Jim sighed audibly, but went back to badgering Antonio into eating with them, then was talking fast into the phone. Marty was perfectly relaxed and really feeling no pain. He couldn't help thinking that his life had been boring without Jim in it. There was no way he could let things go back to the way they'd been before.
He was going to have to come up with some way to keep Jim around forever.
He should have known that things couldn't last, not the way he wanted. So it shouldn't have been surprising that Jim would have to leave for a three month tour because he was part of some big events going on around the country.
Marty knew it was ridiculous to feel as sad and lonely as he did the day after Jim left. Like he hadn't lived for years without his friend in his life and gotten along perfectly fine. But it felt as though someone had reached into his brain and squeezed off his ability to stay rational.
He didn't even realize how bad he'd been until Jane grabbed him one day and commanded him to stop moping or she was going to jam a knitting needle into some part of his anatomy. And from the tone of her voice, she was only partly joking. She would never do anything violent, but she'd really want to.
Jane demanded his attention from that moment on and dragged him around like her new purse. Every time he started to sink into his thoughts, she would show up or send him a text and he wouldn't have time to get moody. It made him feel grateful toward her, that she was willing to put up with him when he was being a dick. Because he didn't want to go out, he didn't want to have conversations, and he didn't want to do anything. At the same time, he wanted to feel better and he knew that the things Jane was doing were helping him and she really was a very good friend, one of the best he'd had in his life.
So he was able to spend his evenings out of the house and in good company, and while he still missed Jim, he wasn't acting like he was missing his best friend. He had some good times with Jane and her friends. The back of his hand looked like it was going to be permanently stained from all the club stamps he'd gotten and he found himself doing little dance wiggles when he least expected it. There'd also been the rather homey day when he'd helped Jane and her aunt bake scones for the International Food Festival at the Beaumont Children's Home. He'd even been talked into wearing his Korlaax costume when he helped deliver the scones and Jane had dressed as a Sargaran displeasure girl. He'd had a lot of fun.
That didn't mean he stopped thinking about Jim though. Which was why, when Jane dragged him shopping with her one Saturday morning, he kept a look out for anything to send to Jim in the care package Jane had talked him into making. She'd even included a couple of small wrapped gifts from her when she'd brought him the big box she told him to use.
He hadn't planned on taking it so seriously, but he found himself treating the building of a care package as if it was a mission and had already found several things he thought Jim would enjoy. A couple of movies, some mildly pornographic manga that had him giggling, and he'd shrugged and tossed in a bag of Oreos because who didn't appreciate some cookies?
Marty watched Jane try on different outfits and pose in front of him, then it was his turn as she tried to force him into various trendy outfits. They went against his jeans and tee shirt sensibility but she was having too much fun to kill her buzz. There ended up being a couple shirts he actually liked and a pair of pants he really couldn't say no to, and when they were looking at coats, he found a black wool thing that he couldn't resist buying. It was still early summer, but he thought Jim would see the humor in getting a winter coat in his care package. Plus, by the time Jim came back, the weather might be cool enough for him to need and appreciate it.
With all that in mind, he didn't hesitate to buy several cashmere sweaters when he spotted them in a men's boutique. They were so soft that when he got two for Jim he couldn't resist getting one for himself in a nice charcoal color.
His feet were getting tired and he was already carrying several bags when Jane vetoed his idea for an early lunch so they could go to a store full of handcrafted jewelry she'd spotted on the way in. He walked around with the bags hanging at his sides while Jane tried to buy the whole store. Then he stood to one side while she haggled with the store owner. That's how he ended up glancing down into one of the display cases and seeing the pendant. It featured a circle an inch in diameter with a shiny unicorn rampant in the middle. It was not a very girly design no matter the unicorn design and he couldn't help admiring it.
"Can I help you with anything?"
He looked up at the store clerk in surprise, not having noticed her approach. "Uh, yeah," he said, tapping the glass counter. "I'll take that one."
She smiled and used the keys bungee corded to her belt to unlock the display case. She took out the silver pendant and held it out toward him, but he shook his head. "Can you just put a silver chain on it?" he asked, pointing to one on the necklace tree.
"That's easy enough." She attached the pendant to the chain he'd picked and put it in a velvet lined necklace box.
He ignored Jane's grin as he paid and dropped the box into one of his shopping bags. "Let's get out of here," he said. "I'm starving."
*~*~*
Being on stage left him vibrating with barely caged energy that didn't go away once he'd left the rest of the band and retreated to his hotel room. He could have probably found himself a dozen lovers, but he wasn't in the mood. So he flopped on his bed alone and tried to find something to watch on TV, his nerves still jangling with the distant thrum of guitar chords.
There was a knock at the door and when he looked through the peephole he saw Ned standing with his head turned to look down the hall. He jerked the door open. "Hey man, I would have thought you'd be partying with the others. What's up?"
Ned gave him a smile and leaned down to pick up a large box near his feet. "This was delivered for you."
Jim quirked his brow, but stepped out of the way and gestured toward the table. "You can put it over there."
Ned set it down with a huff and backed toward the door. "There you go. You need anything else tonight?"
"Nah, I'm good," Jim said, running his eyes over the package. He grunted when he read Marty's name on the return ticket. "See you tomorrow."
"Yeah. 'Night dude." Ned closed the door with a thud behind him, but Jim barely noticed because he was already tearing the tape off the box so he could rip it open.
There was a white envelope sitting on top of what looked like a black blanket. He opened it and was met by the succinct message: Sent you a care package. Hope you enjoy. -Marty (and Jane!) The "and Jane" was written in a rounder handwriting different from Marty's precise, angular letters and there may have been the faint ghost of pink lipstick lips on the paper when he turned it this way and that.
Jim laughed and set the letter aside.
He was surprised to find that the "blanket" was actually a really nice wool coat. When he put it on for a moment he felt like Captain Nemo or something, though he really had to wonder what he was going to do with such a heavy weather coat when it was so hot outside. Still, he folded it neatly across the back of a chair.
He dug through the rest of the box
and found DVDs, candy, a memory card with "MUSIC" printed on the front in Marty's handwriting, and four small packages. Three were from Jane, and one was from Marty with the word "LAST" written on the white paper used to wrap it.
Jim shook the package from Marty curiously, but forced himself to set it down and open the gifts from Jane.
A tin of Altoids, a paperback romance novel with a well-bosomed redhead languishing in the arms of her bare-chested, goatee-sporting lover, and a mug with the realistic image of multi-colored jellybeans all over it. He looked at everything for a couple of minutes, seriously wondering what she was thinking.
Finally he unwrapped Marty's present with more care than he'd shown Jane's, his fingers carefully pulling the tape without ripping the paper. He was surprised to find a jewelry box, and he couldn't help the nervousness that went through him as he lifted the lid and stared down.
He couldn't help laughing. It started out a surprised chuckle, but turned into real, whole-hearted laughter.
He pulled the necklace out of the box and quickly put it on, his fingers sliding down the chain to caress the unicorn pendant. He thought about calling Marty, but he knew it was too late at night for someone that had to work early in the morning. So he would have to wait to give Marty his thanks.
He got a few questions about the necklace, but he just shrugged them off. He knew he was being obvious in his desire to show it off, and the way he wasn't answering questions was building a lot of interest. And for some reason that made him feel good.
When he was on stage one night, the heat and the light overwhelmed him and he'd felt drenched in sweat, as if he were being burned alive. It seemed perfectly natural for him to grab the hem of his shirt and rip it off over his head, tossing it toward the audience. There were screams and cheers and the next day was filled with pictures of his bare chest gleaming with sweat while the front of his pants seemed to hug his crotch. In some of the pictures, he looked gigantic from the angle of the shots, and he couldn't help feeling a bit embarrassed, but there wasn't a whole lot he could do about it.