by Sol Crafter, Diana Sheridan, Talya Andor, Lacie J. Archer, Angel Propps
"Pretty?"
Smiling at the concern scrawled blatantly on AJ's face, Zidane twined his arms around his boyfriend. "None of that love, I'm fine." His stomach grumbled loud enough for me to hear, and he giggled. "Well, hungry, but otherwise fine."
Hand on my lower back urging me towards the table, Rich bent his lips to my ear, whispering, "I know you're still rather protective of him, but he really is perfectly all right."
Plopping down in a chair with a sigh, Zidane glanced over at me as he nimbly rebraided his hair. Brow arched at whatever he found on my face, he laughed. "Oh come now, Garrett, you and I both know even if I were still with the agency those girls couldn't come close to affording my base rate."
I snickered at the thought of them cobbling together his former asking price. He was right, they never would have managed. Hand settling on my thigh possessively, Rich snagged a menu from the slack-jawed Jaz.
Leaning into Rich's personal space, I flicked the tip of my tongue along the seam of his lips, trailed my fingertips down the line of his throat, pressed my thumb into the faint mark I'd left him with, and smiled at his soft hiss. I glanced up at Zidane and murmured, "Pet, I like this side of you; it's delightfully sharp."
Turning his head to brush a kiss across the back of my hand, Rich asked, "Why do you still call Z pet, Garrett?"
Pursing my lips in thought, I laid my hand over the one he had on my thigh. Twisting his wrist so he was able to lace his fingers with mine Rich regarded me curiously as I mused, "I suppose it's out of habit, gorgeous. Zidane has been pet to me for well on eight years now, and it seems odd to call him by anything else." I tucked one of Rich's errant curls behind his ear, adding, "Back before you boys came storming into his life, I rarely called him anything else."
"Unless I did something irritating, like smoke a cigarette in your presence," Zidane said with a wide grin.
Grabbing at one of the dinner rolls in the center of the table, I lobbed it in his direction. "Cheeky brat."
Dodging the flying food, he waved our still silent server over, saying, "I promise, we'll be more than worth your trouble, Jaz."
Voice breathy, she stammered, "This c-certainly explains the 'something like that' response I got when I asked if y-you were in town for what is apparently your own concert." Joining her laughter, the rest of the band settled around the table and accepted the menus she passed out.
*~*~*
Mind dizzied from one too many beers at dinner, I trailed alongside Garrett, the night deceptively calm around me. Fingers tangled with his, I swung our joined arms as my heart danced beneath my ribs. He'd been good at the restaurant, managing to survive the uprising of fans which had disrupted our dinner. Could I dare to hope he might be the man I'd been wishing for, the one who would be my Z?
Steering me through a set of automatic doors, and in to the hotel's lobby, he murmured, "You're being oddly silent, gorgeous. Not ill are you?"
I paused, leaning in to his side and blinked, shaking my head slowly to avoid sending it spinning. "No, beer's making my head a bit loose feeling, probably should have passed on that last one."
Laughter warm in my ear, he walked me backwards until I was pressed to the wall of the elevator. Closing my eyes to still the world's merry-go-round, I moaned into the devouring press of his mouth over mine. Tongue darting in to taste me, he hauled my hips closer, bringing them flush to his. Hard length of his arousal grinding against mine, he released my lips with a gasp.
Tugged in his wake, down a hall filled with blurry closed doors, I panted, "Missed you, want you, want to feel you buried inside me."
Pressed to another wall, my train of thought utterly destroyed by his teeth and mouth, I clung to his suit jacket. "I'm going to make you scream so loud you'll be lucky if you can talk tomorrow," he growled against my bruised lips. Door unlocked, he shoved me into his suite.
Stumbling forward, I managed to steady myself on the back of a chair. I peered over my shoulder at the sound of the door being locked. "Expecting or deterring guests?" I slurred.
Suit jacket dropped carelessly to the floor, he advanced on me as he worked his cufflinks open. Trailing a hand up the sides of my legs and over my ass, he smirked. "Deterring, should the 'do not disturb' sign not tell them I will not take kindly to being interrupted tonight." Cufflinks following his jacket to the floor, he tugged his tie loose. Palm striking my denim covered ass with a sharp smack, he gave me a droll look. "You planning on staying clothed, gorgeous? I can think of so many fun things to do with you naked and in my bed."
Tossing my leather jacket to the side I reached out and grabbed the front of his shirt, yanking him to me, crushing our mouths together in a clash of teeth. Matching my hunger, he sank fingers in my curls. Head forced back by his grip, I submitted control of the kiss to him readily. Jerking his shirt free of his slacks, I shoved a hand down the back of his pants to grab hold of his ass.
I tore my mouth free and moaned. "God, you had to go commando today, didn't you?"
"Dressed in the hope I might be able to convince you to go down on me backstage, after your rehearsal." Hips rocking against mine, with a sigh he added, "Didn't want to complicate my desire for instant gratification."
I pulled my T-shirt over my head with a slow chuckle. "I'll do it tomorrow, after the show, if you want," I purred, going to work on the buttons running down his chest. I wanted him naked in my arms.
Batting my fumbling hand away, he quickly shrugged free of the starched shirt. Wife beater shucked equally fast, he drew my mouth back to his. Releasing me when oxygen became necessary, he purred, "Come to bed, gorgeous drummer of mine."
Toeing off his loafers, fingers undoing his belt, he backed towards the bedroom. I crouched and scrabbled at the laces on my boots, kicking them off as soon as I got them loosened. Chewing my bottom lip, I made my way into the dimly lit bedroom.
Heart skipping, I halted just inside the room, the sight of him spread naked across the sheets, his hand languidly stroking his leaking cock, stealing my breath. "Fuck," I whispered, eyes roaming over his skin. Shoving my jeans down, I stepped free of them and prowled to stand at the foot of the bed. Tongue wetting my lips, I watched Garrett's thumb slide over the flushed head of his cock.
I climbed onto the sheets, nudging his hand out of the way. I wanted to be the one touching him, the one making him whimper and moan. Fingers feathering over his inner thighs, I dipped my lips to take him in.
Pre-cum tangy, I slid down his length, enjoying the breathy sounds filling the air. I loved knowing I was the one driving him to lose control. Sucking in a deep breath through my nose, I relaxed around his girth, loving the weight of him in my mouth, humming when he hit the back of my throat. Bucking beneath me, he cried out my name. Hand in my curls, he tugged me off his cock with a wet pop. Urging me further onto the bed, he seized my mouth for a kiss.
Rolled under his body, I laughed against his lips, asking, "Going to make me scream now?"
"You bet your sexy ass I am."
*~*~*
Phone beside my bed ringing, I shifted, lifting the headset to my ear. Chipper hotel staff informing me that it was ten AM. I thanked them for remembering my wake-up call and hung up, turning back to find Rich yawning.
Sandy curls a mess, he scrubbed a hand over his eyes. As the other hand reached for me, he rasped, "Come back here, I was comfortable."
Grinning at the rough sound of his voice, I pulled him into my lap. Arms readily curling around me, he licked the corner of my mouth. I sank my fingers in his tousled hair and pulled his lips to mine, wanting to taste him. Kiss slow and sweet, Rich sighed when we parted, resting his cheek on my shoulder.
"Gorgeous, you alright?" I asked, combing my hand through his curls. I didn't like the hint of disappointment I heard in his sigh.
Touching his throat with a grimace, he nodded and whispered, "I'm fine, Garrett, though satisfyingly sore." Nail scraping faintly over my nipple, he pressed a kiss to my collarbone. "You know the guys are going to
tease the both of us over my lack of voice, right?"
Chuckling, I stretched, freezing as Rich slithered down to bury his face in my lap. The wet heat of his tongue dipping into my navel, he smirked up at me. Unfolding my legs, I murmured, "Mm, I'm sure I can suffer through them. I did earn it.
"Rich, gorgeous, we need to get dressed and, ungh, get to the arena," I groaned, head thunking back against the wall as he sucked on my cock.
Humming around me, he held my hips down on the bed, refusing to let me move. Lack of control sending a shiver of fear through me, I stared down at him, his cheeks hollowed when he slid up my length. Ache building in my heart, I bit my lip. God, he was sexy as hell, his green eyes watching me, the tip of his tongue flicking over my slit. Squeezing my eyes shut, I whimpered.
Swallowed back down his throat, I clutched at his hair, the burn of my release growing in my stomach. Tugging at his curls, I moaned, "Fuck, Rich, I'm almost there."
Throat rippling around me, he rubbed a spit-slick finger against my pucker. Eyes flying open at the unfamiliar touch, I arched into the heat of his mouth as he pushed it inside me. Sliding up my length until only the head of my cock remained between his lips, he crooked his finger.
Keening, balls drawing tight to my body, I crashed over the edge of my release. Heart pounding, I watched him pull off me with a satisfied smirk. After a flick of his tongue caught the cum he couldn't manage to swallow, he pulled my mouth to his. Tasting myself with his own uniqueness, I deepened the kiss, wanting to be as tangled up in him as possible.
What the hell was I getting myself into? Rich was delightful, no question about it, but could I let my iron control weaken, allowing myself to risk the unexpected with him? Ten years ago, I opened myself up for a whole mess of heartache by placing my trust in another man, and I wasn't sure if I could do it again, no matter how much I enjoyed my time with Rich.
Heart twinging at the thought of not having him in my life, I tucked his head back under my chin. He was a rockstar, a part of him I loved; however, unlike Zidane, I wasn't able to drop everything to tour with them. Could I trust him enough to know that when he was gone, constantly surrounded by fans willing to do anything, that he wouldn't do something?
Bending my head down, he frowned, and asked, "Garrett? What's wrong? And don't you dare say nothing, because I can see something is bothering you."
"Am I enough for you?" I blurted before I could stop myself.
Frown deepening, Rich tugged himself from my loose embrace. "Enough for me? What are you talking about? Are you asking me if I slept around while I was on tour?" On his feet, he grabbed his jeans from the floor and jerked them on, scowling over at me. "Or are you worried you won't be able to give up your habits of paying for companionship? Is that it? Too used to having guys like you just for the money you give them that you don't know what to expect from someone who isn't with you because of it?"
"Rich?" Heart in my throat, I trailed after him when he stormed from the bedroom.
"Well, fuck you, Garrett! I did nothing these past nine months save look forward to being back home so I could see you again. I turned down so many offers I stopped keeping count, all because I thought you deserved something more than paying for a quick fuck." Yanking his shirt over his head, he stomped his boots on and grabbed his leather jacket. "Apparently I was wrong."
I grabbed his arm and dug my feet in, keeping him from the room's door, my carefully controlled world teetering on the edge. "Please Rich, I-I don't know what you want me to say. The thought of you not being a part of my life hurts like nothing else I've felt. But, I can't leave my job like Zidane did. I want you, want you so badly I'm fucking this whole thing up because I don't know what to say."
"You think I'm upset because you can't follow me when I leave on tour? I knew touring would have meant being apart for long stretches of time. I was even willing to work with the escorts being around when I wasn't."
Wrenching his arm free, Rich shoved his mirrored glasses over his eyes. "Damn it, Garrett, I'm not one of your rent boys, I don't need, or want, your money."
Hands hanging limp at my sides, I watched him pull open the door, whispering his name as a plea for him to stop, to wait, to let me figure out how to put in to words my desires and fears.
Pausing in the doorway he sighed. "All I wanted was you, but I guess I was asking too much."
As the door closed behind him, I sank to my knees.
*~*~*
How did we go from happily cuddling in bed after a night of amazing sex to me alone in my suite? Was he right, had I been treating him like an escort? I sent him presents, true, but I'd sent them because I wanted him to think of me while he was away, wanted him to remember our New Year's together.
Climbing to my feet I made my way back to the bedroom, a hand pressed to my chest in an attempt to sooth the pain. I grabbed my cell phone and curled up against the headboard, automatically dialing Zidane's personal number. He'd always listened to my problems before; I could only hope he would still be willing to do so now that we were friends.
"Garrett?"
I tucked my knees under my chin and wrapped an arm around them. "Pet, do you have time to listen? I need someone to talk to, and you're the only person who knows me well enough to understand where I''m coming from. But if you're busy, don't worry about—"
"Garrett, take a deep breath," he said, cutting me off. Licking my lips, I do as I'm told, tugging the blankets up around my ribs.
Music in the background fading, he murmured, "No matter what, know that I'll always have time to listen to you. Now, why don't you tell your pet what's got you so twisted up that you called, when you should still be enjoying Rich's company."
"He's why I'm calling," I whimpered, scrubbing at my burning eyes. "I fucked up, and I don't know how I did it. I know I want him in my life, but I don't know if I can give him what he needs. I've been, for all intents, single for a decade, my only companionship found in men I pay for; how can I possibly be a man who deserves someone like Rich?"
"Is his opinion what you're worried about, or are you afraid that if you take this step towards an actual relationship that you'll be hurt again?" Zidane asked quietly.
"He said all he wanted from me was me, and now that he's not here with me it hurts. What does that mean?"
Sighing softly, Zidane said, "That's a step in the correct direction Garrett, but you avoided my question. Is Rich worth giving up some of your control for? Does he mean enough to you, even this soon, that you'd be willing to brave letting him in, and deal with whatever bumps you may experience as a couple?"
"I—"
"Think before you answer me. Loving someone is never what you expect it to be, and yes, sometimes it's painful; but I've found it's always worth it."
I pulled Rich's pillow up against my chest, breathing in the lingering smell of him. Heart aching, I whispered, "These past nine months I've barely had anything to do with the agencies. Every time I thought about calling someone, I was struck by the thought of what he would say if he knew. I don't know if I love him, or if I'm just infatuated with the moment, but I do know he has become the most important part of my life, and I desperately want to keep him in my life. I want him to know why I'm so terrified of the direction we are going, and understand how much he means to me."
"Then you need to tell him all you just told me. That's the best advice I can offer you right now."
"I will." I buried my face in his pillow, craving the completeness his scent brought me. "I'll fix this tonight, even if I have to tie him to a chair backstage so he'll listen to me."
*~*~*
Stupid, stupid move. Why had I overreacted so badly to a simple question? All Garrett wanted to know was if I thought he was enough for me to be happy. He was probably more scared than I was about the possibility of an actual relationship. Z had never mentioned him having anything beyond his escorts for as long as he had known him.
Waving at the security at the back of the arena, I slipped through the g
ate with a quick swipe of an ID card. Fuck, my tantrum had probably destroyed any chance I might have had with him. Everything had been going so well, and damn it all if he hadn't achieved his goal: I could still feel him inside me with every step I took.
Yanking at my hair in frustration I slumped back against a wall. Part of me wanted to run back to his suite and beg forgiveness for my idiocy, wanted to just give up all control to him. But I couldn't see myself being happy with a relationship where my partner and I didn't stand on equal footing, and Garrett … Garrett seemed so hesitant to trust me.
Dressing room door swinging open across the hall, Z peered out at me, beckoning to me with a finger, his cell phone at his ear. I walked towards him with a heavy heart. I was in for an earful. He knew Garrett the best, and I knew he wasn't going to be happy with me, but maybe he would be willing to help me figure out how to best apologize.
Black eyes watching me calmly, Z murmured, "Of course I'll meet you out front before the show. No, it's no bother at all, Garrett, just remember what you said earlier, and everything will work itself out as it's meant to be." Laughing, he settled back into the couch. "Yes, you are an idiot at times, but don't worry, I'll still put up with you even in your dumbest moments. Uh-huh, love you too, old man."
Heart screaming in pain, I gripped the door frame and asked, "Is he mad at me?"
"Come, sit with me Rich, tell me your side of this mess, and maybe after I hear your story I'll answer that question," he said, patting the cushions next to him. I dropped down beside Z, allowing him to wrap his arms around me. Chaste kiss brushed over my cheek, he tucked himself into my side, and murmured, "So, talk, big man. I've heard Garrett's take, but if I'm going to be able to help at all I need to know what you feel happened."
"I overreacted," I muttered. "It just feels like Garrett is trying to use his money too much, that he isn't giving what we have enough of a chance to stand by itself, that he doesn't trust me." I scrubbed a hand through my curls, dropping my head back. "God, I feel like such an ass, Z. I didn't even give him the chance to say anything, I just went off on him, and then walked out, leaving him there alone." Coughing at the strain of using my voice after the night I'd had, I managed a weak smile when Z passed me a bottle of water.