She chews her lip, her eyes searching mine as we move to the couch to sit down. I can’t tell if she’s pissed or upset. Her face shows no emotion at all.
“You made me feel like the most special woman in the world that night,” she says, and I smile. “Until you made me feel like nothing more than a whore.”
Ouch. Fuck. “Payton, I swear to you that was not my intention. I sure as hell didn’t mean to make you feel that way. Fuck,” I say, running my hand through my hair.
“Maybe you didn’t, but that’s what happened. You think I wasn’t confused and overwhelmed after? I was, but you were too busy fucking and chucking to even notice,” she huffs out, taking a sip of her beer.
Fuck and chuck, yeah that’s exactly what I did. It’s what I always do, but until her, I didn’t care. It never even crossed my mind that I made them feel anything like this. As long as we both had a good time, that’s all that mattered. Until Payton.
“I don’t deserve your forgiveness, for making you feel that way.” I grab her hand, unable to resist the need to touch her. “But, I swear I’ll do anything I can to be worthy of it.”
She doesn’t pull her hand away, so I take that as a good sign. A sign that at the very least she feels something like I do.
“You’re one of the most confusing men I’ve ever met,” she whispers, looking past me.
“How so?” I ask.
“You want me, you don’t, you want me. I’m not used to that. I’m used to something completely different.”
Rubbing my thumb on the palm of her hand, I grin. “Let’s be clear right now. I’ve never not wanted you.”
“You might want to work on your delivery of that message,” she jokes.
“Believe me, I’m working on it.” I want to kiss her, pull her against me and rip off her clothes. I want to taste and fuck her, until she believes me. But damn it, I’m a man of my word and I told her I wouldn’t do anything. I try to ignore my cock pushing painfully against my zipper and focus on why I’m here. “How about you tell me what happened Monday?”
Immediately, she gets tense and tries to pull her hand away. Fuck no, she’s not running. I pushed her away once, but that shit isn’t going to happen again. Not as long as she wants me.
“I told you, nothing.”
“Payton, you were fucking terrified. What did Charlie do to you?” I carefully ask. She’s been different since the Charlie incident. I need to know if it’s because of him or me.
She shakes her head, causing her long hair to fall into her beautiful face. “Nothing. I’ve only spoken to him a few times. He took me off guard is all. I don’t think I’ll have that problem again,” she says, letting out a quick sigh. “He hasn’t even looked in my direction since you threatened him.”
“That wasn’t a threat; it was a promise. No one hurts the people I care about,” I admit. “Not if I can help it.”
“Asher, you don’t even know me that well. You sure as hell don’t care about me,” she says, giving me a slight roll of her gorgeous eyes.
Without a clear thought, I lean forward, pushing her down onto the couch. I hover over her, placing my hands on either side of her beautiful face. “I may not know everything about you, Payton, but I never say something I don’t mean. I care about you.” Never in my life would I think I would say that to someone. I’m sure as hell not saying I love her, but I do have feelings for her. After one goddamn night together. She’s gotten inside of me. It may fuck up any chance I have at having her father help me. But right now, in the moment, I don’t give a fuck.
“Okay,” she quietly says.
I chuckle and sit up, needing to have distance between us. “I just want the chance to get to know you, Payton. Is that something you’re willing to do?”
She nods her head, with just the hint of a smile on her soft lips. “Yeah.”
Slowly leaning forward, I press my lips to hers. Wrapping my fingers in her silky hair, I turn her head and deepen the kiss. When I taste her again, my resolve starts to waiver. The need to fuck her, claim her, is overwhelming. I know I need to stop. I want her to believe me when I give her my word. If I fuck her like I want to, yeah it will be amazing, but she’ll know my word means nothing. Right now, I need her to trust me.
Pulling away, I keep my fingers in her hair and search her bright blue eyes. “I’m not going to lie, I want you so damn bad it’s killing me. But I promised you nothing would happen, and as much as it physically hurts, and Christ it does, I don’t go back on my word.”
Her hands rest on my chest and she grips my shirt. Licking her lips, she clears her throat. “Asher, don’t make me beg you. You don’t go back on your word, I get that. My body is in pain, a pain only you can take away.”
Fuck. The way she is looking at me with such need, it’s undeniable. I let go of her hair and pull her shirt over her head, dropping it on the floor. Her hard nipples poke through her black lace bra, making my cock twitch. Pulling her onto my lap, she straddles me, and I claim her mouth again, until she lets out a soft moan.
I grab her hair, turning her head. I kiss, lick, suck and bite on her neck. She rubs her pussy on my hard cock. Even though we still have our pants on, it feels fucking good. Kissing a path down her neck I bite down on each of her hard nipples, causing her to arch her back. She unfastens her bra and slides it down her arms, letting it fall between us.
Her nails sink into my hair, holding me as I bite down on her tits. “Asher,” she moans, softly.
Backing up just a bit, I pull my shirt off and grin. “Stand up and take off your pants, Payton,” I command.
She obeys. Unbuttoning her shorts, she slowly pulls the zipper down, watching me. Pushing down, she steps out of them. Standing in front of me in nothing but black lace panties is one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen. Reaching out, I grab her hips and pull her closer to me to kiss her stomach and move down to the top of her panties.
I smell her sweet arousal already, and it ignites a fire inside me. I run my nose along her pussy and lick her over her panties. She rubs against me and lets out a loud moan. She’s so wet, I can taste her, and it only spurs me on. I bite her clit and she digs her nails into my shoulders.
Yanking off her panties, I lick my lips when I see her glistening pussy. She’s fucking dripping, and I’m not about to let a drop of it go to waste. My mouth covers her bare pussy, sucking. Her nails dig in deeper on my shoulders and I hope she leaves me marked. My tongue licks at her, feasting. The determination to make her come is overpowering. It’s my only thought as I lick at her dripping pussy.
Her hips buck forward, as she moans. “ Asher. I’m so close, keep going,” she pleads, rubbing against my face.
I pick up my speed and rub her clit faster. She’s going to come, I can feel it. When I pinch her clit, she screams as her release crashes over her. I continue to lick her, making sure I get every drop she has to offer me. When she’s done, her legs shake.
“So fucking good,” I say licking my lips. It takes me about two minutes to undress and get the condom on. “Sit on me, but with your back to me.”
She sinks down onto me, slowly, holding onto my knees. I can’t take it and grab her hips pulling her down as I thrust into her. “Fuck,” she shouts.
Pulling her hair, I turn her head and bite on her neck. “Feels good, doesn’t it?” I ask, as she begins to find a rhythm.
“Yes,” she breathes out.
Moving her hips, helping her know how fast I want her to go, she finally gets it. My dick buried in her tight cunt feels incredible. I smack her ass, feeling her pussy tighten on me.
Yanking her head back, my eyes collide with hers. “You fucking like that don’t you? You like to feel that pain while I fuck you.”
“Yes,” she whispers.
Letting go of her hair, I smack her ass again and again, making sure to leave it nice and pink. She’s not going to last much longer, so I wrap my arm around her, pulling her against my chest. I sink my teeth into her shoulder and she screams
in ecstasy.
“Fuck, Asher, I’m going to come,” she cries out, digging her nails into my arm.
“I know you are,” I say, reaching around to pinch her clit.
Just as I do, she explodes. Coming all over me as she shouts my name. I need to feel the release that rips through you, tearing you in two. I continue to pound into her, and bite down on her neck by my arm. I can feel it coming on, I’m not going to last, but I couldn’t give a shit. Because right now, I just need to come.
“Fuck, Payton,” I hiss, being ripped in half.
It’s all consuming, in the best possible way as I wrap my arms around her. I’m surrounded by her scent, her silky skin with my cock still inside her. Once we’re both able to speak again, I lift her off me, cradling her against me.
She wraps her arms around me and kisses my chest. “I didn’t think it could get better,” she murmurs.
I chuckle and kiss the top of her head. “Just wait,” I promise. This is just the beginning.
Chapter Ten
───────────────
Payton
Asher stays for a few hours and even though he wanted to stay the night, I sent him home. I’m not ready to have anyone in my bed overnight. Maybe that will change some day, but, right now, this is how it needs to be. He understood, letting me know I could take all the time I needed. He said he would never rush me.
I’ve been trying to sleep for over an hour now, but my mind is running. Asher makes me feel things, and it’s scary. Trying to wrap my head around everything he said, everything he made me feel, and everything he did...it’s overwhelming.
He said he wants us to get to know everything about each other. Knowing everything is scary. Much too scary. No one knows everything about someone. Everyone has secrets they don’t want to tell. Things they want to keep hidden. Some aren’t as bad as others, but there is no way to fully know a person.
Wondering what his secrets are, I finally feel myself falling asleep.
The next morning, I wake up to a text from Asher.
Asher: I want to take you out to dinner.
Hm. I’m tempted, but there’s too many reasons why that’s not a good idea.
Me: I’d rather cook for you at your place.
I kind of wish now I had more than the bare essentials.
Asher: But can you cook? That’s the question.
Me: You’d be surprised what I can do
Asher: Oh yeah?
Me: Yep. What do you like?
Asher: You.
I smile like a giddy fool at the phone. If that's not the perfect answer, I don't know what is. He definitely knows what to say, and a part of me, the insecure part, wonders if his secret is he does this all the time.
Me: I’ll surprise you. You're guaranteed to love it.
Asher: I don't doubt that at all.
And then he does something that nearly brings down all my defenses.
Asher: :)
His little smiley face puts a bigger one on mine. It's silly, really, but it seems so not something he would do. Ugh. Stop it. For all I know that's his signature. Obviously, I can't leave it unanswered, so I send one back and toss my phone down.
Doing the boring things of the day, I plan out what I’ll make for dinner. I’m actually a good cook, it’s just not something I enjoy doing that much anymore. Maybe, Asher will make me change my mind.
I decide to make stuffed shells and chicken Parmesan with garlic bread and a garden salad.
As I make my list for a quick trip to the store, my phone rings.
“Hello?”
“Hey. I want you to come home for dinner tonight. What do you say?” my dad asks, sounding much too excited.
Feeling terrible, I answer him honestly. “I can’t tonight. I have plans already. Another time?”
“You have plans? With who?” he questions, no longer excited. I’m not sure if he sounds more pissed or defeated.
Knowing there is no way he will be alright with me seeing Asher, I hide the truth from him. Something I've become good at, so it’s easy. “A girl I met in my building. She’s really sweet, and we’ve been hanging out. She invited me over for a girl’s night with a few of her friends. Thought it might be nice to make some friends.”
“Oh, that’s a great idea. You definitely need to find some friends. Well, have fun and I’ll take a raincheck for now.”
“Okay for sure. I need to get ready though, so I’ll see you Monday at work.”
We hang up and I shower and get dressed in record time and rush out the door.
Stopping by the grocery store to pick up a few things, I hope he’ll like what I prepare.
I pull up to his house, and he is there. All muscles and a big smile. He’s really good-looking. And I’m not just saying that, he really is. His eyes light up when he opens my car door for me as I shut off the engine. I get out and before I can even grab the bags, he’s opening the back door and reaching inside.
“I’ll get them,” he says, grinning.
“Hey. Alright, thanks.”
After he grabs them, he pulls me in for a kiss. “Hey.”
Damn. He’s good.
Once dinner is prepped, which takes longer than I think, I put it all in the oven. Asher hasn’t been able to keep his hands off of me. If he’s not smacking my ass, he’s kissing my neck or rubbing up against me anyway he can. It’s sweet. It makes me feel almost special, until that damn thought creeps back in.
He hands me a beer and I hop up on the island. “Can I ask you something?” I question, feeling brave.
“You can ask me anything.”
Rubbing my thumb on the condensation of the beer bottle, I take a deep breath. “Is this your secret?”
He doesn’t say anything, so I risk looking at him. His eyebrows are drawn in, as he studies me. “My secret? Is what my secret?”
“This,” I say waving my hand around. “You know exactly what to say, how to act. I mean it’s like a well-rehearsed play that you’ve done a million times.”
Pushing to stand between my legs, he takes my beer placing it next to me. Running his hands on my thighs, he sighs. “There is nothing rehearsed about this. I don’t normally do this. Sex, hanging out at the bar or club, even a handful of dinners at restaurants. That’s my thing. I don’t have chicks make me dinner or hang out with them watching TV. This is as new for me as it is you. If I know what to say or how to act, it’s because of you. I look at you and these things just happen.”
I believe him. I completely believe him. Looking into his eyes, I can see he’s being honest with me, which just shocks me even more. How is he real?
“Wow, alright.” Those are the only words I can manage to find.
“Can I ask you a question?” he questions, and my stomach drops. I hate questions.
Forcing a small smile, I nod. “Sure.”
“Have you ever been in a serious relationship?”
“Once, but I ended it,” I say, taking a long sip of my beer.
“Why?” he pushes.
Putting my beer down, I rest my hands on his. “He wasn’t the right guy for me.” And that is one hundred percent the truth.
A gorgeous smile spreads on his face, as he squeezes my thighs. “I guess I lucked out.”
I laugh. For the first time, I lean forward, and kiss his lips. “Yeah, you did.”
───────────────
Before I know it, dinner is done and we are sitting at his table to eat. I’ll admit, it looks and smells heavenly. I can’t wait to see if it tastes the same.
Asher takes a bite and looks at me with wide eyes. “Damn, this is delicious. You can really cook,” he says, shoving more food into his mouth.
It’s so flattering. It makes me feel good about myself. “Thanks,” I say, smiling.
Dinner is just as amazing as I hoped it would be and after we get it all cleaned up, we grab another drink and head into the living room. Deciding to watch a movie, we sit on the
couch, as he turns the television on.
During the movie, Asher ended up on his back with me tucked into his side. It’s comfortable, it’s affectionate, it’s safe. Trailing his fingers lazily up and down my arm, almost like it’s happening without a thought, makes my pulse pick up.
“Hey Payton,” he says, breaking through the silence we’ve had since the movie started.
“Hmm,” I reply, realizing how tired I am.
His fingers stop, resting on my arm. “Tell me something about yourself.”
“Like what?” I ask, hoping it’s something general.
Pressing a soft kiss beneath my ear, he whispers, “Anything. How about what your job was before coming to the garage?”
My job before the garage, that should be easy. It is easy, it’s just thinking back that far makes my pulse race. Only this time it’s not from Asher’s touch. Closing my eyes, I force myself to relax. “A hiking guide.”
Turning so we are both on our sides on the leather couch, he brushes my hair out of my eyes. “No shit. That sounds exciting. I thought you just enjoyed hiking. I had no idea you were a guide. It’s shocking honestly,” he says, smiling an honest smile.
“Yeah, I was a guide and I loved it. Sometimes it would be school groups that would come through and the kids would be so wide eyed. They loved learning about the nature that surrounded them. Honestly, everyone did. It wasn’t just fun, it was rewarding,” I say, around a smile. Thinking back on all the good times I had.
He captures my mouth, kissing me. It’s not rushed or rough, it’s slow and tender. My heart aches with the emotions he is making me feel from being so gentle.
Breaking the kiss, he searches my eyes. “When you get excited about something, I see this flicker of life in your eyes. It’s not always there, but damn, when it is, it’s amazing. Why would you leave something you love so much to come here and work in the garage?”
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