by Leslie North
Melanie
Melanie gripped Luciano’s wrist and refused to let it go. It was seldom that she took the lead. As his personal assistant, her job was to follow but she couldn’t let him go on like this. Luciano was hurting, and he made it clear both through words and actions. If he did nothing to correct the damage done, he’d never feel any better. For the rest of his life, he’d struggle with the memory of a love now long gone.
Cassandra had passed away before Melanie was in the picture. While Melanie had never lost anyone close to her and she would never tell him that his grieving was excessive, when was he going to start living again? Luciano needed to have a frank conversation with himself. He needed to let his guilt go and move forward.
“I’m serious about what I said before,” Melanie said. Most times, when dealing with a confrontation, she crumbled. This time she was resolved to hold fast. “What you’ve been doing up until now isn’t healthy for you. I know you’re going to argue with me and say there’s nothing wrong with traveling, and I would agree with you, if you were traveling for healthy reasons. You’re not. You’re using your time on the road as an escape.”
She breathed out slowly through her nose and pushed onward. “It’s time you confronted Cassandra’s death and started moving past it. I know it’s hard, and I know you don’t ever want to forget her, but you’re limiting yourself by clinging to the past.”
Luciano’s eyes narrowed. He was angry, but Melanie didn’t care. She needed to say what was on her mind, and she needed to get Luciano out of his toxic stagnation.
She was his personal assistant for matters of business, but she’d come to know him as a friend as well. He deserved to be happy, and he was holding himself back from finding the happiness he deserved.
“You need to be here for this. You need to confront your past and rise above it.”
“I’m not interested in rising up. I think I’ve done enough of that already.” Luciano’s words were hardened, and he pulled his wrist away from her and jammed his hands into his pockets. “I’m not interested in the notoriety. People don’t look at me now as a person; they look at me as a brand.”
Melanie understood the pain in his words, but she wouldn’t tolerate the stubbornness. All her life she’d been rootless as her parents drifted up and down the west coast wherever their whims took them, and she regretted every second of it. She’d never had a base, never had lasting friendships, never formed the connections or associations she should have with any town in particular….
If Luciano was going to cling to his memories of the past and never settle down again, he was in for the same drifting existence. Like a paper bag in the wind, he’d lack substance.
She didn’t want that for him.
“I understand that it feels dishonest, and that it’s a big step to release the reins, but this is why I’m telling you it’s important to face your past so you can become a more rounded person in the future. I struggled, too. I struggled a lot to get to where I am. If I followed my life the way it was supposed to go? I’d be like my sister—barefoot and pregnant at twenty-six with five children already. I took control of my past, got over it, and rose above it despite my circumstances. You can, too.”
Talking about her past was a sensitive topic, and Melanie didn’t like to demonize her sister, but she needed to get the message across. Violet was happy with her life, and Melanie was happy for her, but there was no way she would ever have married at seventeen and started a family like that.
“Your way isn’t my way,” Luciano said. “We come from different backgrounds and have been through different life events. You’ve never suffered a loss like that.”
“I may not have experienced a death, but I left behind the only life I knew and built a new life for myself from nothing.” Melanie pursed her lips. “I let my old self die and became the woman I am today. I understand the struggle of losing a part of myself but at the same time, I was able to discover who I really am.”
There was a moment where both of them only looked at each other. Luciano’s eyes were the most startling shade of blue, and two years later, she still wasn’t over them. It wasn’t fair how attractive he was, or the way he made her feel if she didn’t keep her walls up. Emotionally riled as she was, keeping those boundaries between them was increasingly difficult.
“It’s not the same,” Luciano argued.
“And I would never claim it is, but I understand the basics of where you’re coming from, at least.” Melanie picked his bag from Hudson Burger up from the desk and handed it to him. Luciano took it from her. The anger was still thick between them, but Melanie wasn’t going to stoke its flames anymore. She’d said her bit. The seed was planted. Whether he wanted to or not, Luciano had to process what she’d said to him. From there, he’d make a decision to come around or keep himself alienated. Ultimately, the choice was his.
“I’m leaving the shop for a while,” Luciano said. It didn’t surprise her. Melanie watched as he made his way toward the swinging doors, and then hesitated. “While I’m gone, I want you to look up weekend accommodations in LA for the twenty-eighth through the thirtieth. When I’m back after lunch, we can talk about whatever you find.”
Despite her pleading, he was still trying to run. Melanie knew that he’d extend his weekend getaway to include the twenty-seventh in a heartbeat if she didn’t do something to stop him.
At this point, she wondered if the struggle was worth it. Luciano was so steadfast in his ways that it felt like a lost cause.
When he exited the tattoo bay, she sighed and sank into her office chair. Tearing the paper bag down the side, she munched on fries one by one, as she investigated weekend retreats in Los Angeles for the end of April.
At the end of the day, she was still his personal assistant, and he was the one paying her bills.
She needed to be respectful of that no matter how much she wanted to knock some sense into him.
6
Luciano
Melanie hadn’t been lying when she’d come in from picking up their food—the day was blisteringly hot, and Luciano stuck to the shade as often as he could. Not far from Thorn Tattoo was a bar the DeRose brothers liked to meet at, and he headed directly for it. It was a little shy of four in the afternoon, and the place was starting to pick up for happy hour. A little noise was fine. It would help drown out his thoughts.
He couldn’t get over the things Melanie had said to him.
Was he being irresponsible by dodging the topic of Cassandra’s death every time it came up? He was. He wouldn’t deny it. As a person, Luciano considered himself sound. No one made the right choices all the time, and he silently loathed Melanie for judging him like she had.
That anger didn’t last long.
As Luciano made his way into the Twisted Oak, bag of food in hand, he thought about what Melanie had said. She always had his best interest at heart. As much as he disliked what they’d talked about, he couldn’t overlook the fact that she was the same woman who’d rescheduled all his appointments on the fly when he’d woken up with bronchitis while they were in Portland, and who’d somehow managed to make his schedule at a local convention at the same time mesh with his peak energy levels while minimizing the time he needed to be in public. She’d been the one to help him change out a busted tire on his bike on the road between Chicago and Detroit. She’d been the one to force him to stop regularly on their way to New York so he could warm up in her car. Every step of the way, Melanie had been with him.
It was the first time they’d ever fought about anything.
“Hey, Luc,” Porter said from behind the counter. He owned the place. Luciano figured it was too early for his regular staff to report in, so for now he was manning the bar himself while one of his waitresses saw to the tables.
“Hey, P.” Luciano sat himself down at the bar and tore his paper bag open.
“It’s against bar policy to eat that in here,” Porter told him as he shifted closer.
“You’re the o
wner.”
“That, I am.” Reaching out, he snagged a few fries. “You want your usual?”
“Yeah.” Luciano unwrapped his burger from the foil. He hadn’t told her, but Melanie had remembered to ask for no onions as well as no pickles. He sighed.
“Shitty day at work?” Porter slid a pint across the bar. It came to rest directly in front of Luciano. “Looks like life’s got you beat.”
“Yup.” Luciano bit into his burger, chewed, then swallowed. “I just needed to get away for a little bit and put my head back on straight. There’s too much going on. I’m not used to being back in town.”
“I didn’t think you’d ever come back, to be honest.”
His friendship with Porter started when the two of them were still in high school. In art class, Porter had noticed his drawings and they’d become fast friends. Porter claimed he didn’t have a talented bone in his body, but Luciano disagreed. What the man lacked in artistic ability, he made up for in home brewing. No one made beer as fine as his, and although he didn’t sell it at the bar due to food regulations, Luciano loved to kick back with a bottle at Porter’s place.
“It’s a mess.”
“I wish I could help.” Porter clapped him on the shoulder. “Sometimes life is shitty. I always say you’ve got to roll with the punches, but then again, I’ve never been knocked on my face and curb stomped like you’ve been.”
“That’s a pretty apt way to describe it.” Luciano let the conversation lapse. While Porter scrubbed the bar down and prepared for a busy night, Luciano ate his lunch and thought about what he was going to do. No matter what Melanie said, he needed to get out of town. He wasn’t ready to face his past yet. It was too soon. Too sudden. Too lonely.
Yet, if he wasn’t going to a convention on the east coast and burning his time there, then he needed a proper reason to get out of the city. Los Angeles was fun, but if he didn’t have something to occupy his mind, he knew it would wander back to the tragedy.
Out of impulse, he fished his phone out of his pocket and dialed Antonio. While the phone rang, he sipped at his beer. It was exactly what he needed to soothe his nerves and pull himself back together.
“Hello?” Antonio asked, almost suspiciously. It was rare that Luciano called.
“Hey. You busy?”
“Always,” Antonio replied dryly. As the most business oriented DeRose, Antonio was always involved with negotiations, profit reviews, board meetings, and all of the things that drove Luciano absolutely bonkers. He identified much more with his younger brother, Giovanni. They’d both followed in their father’s footsteps whereas Antonio had chosen business.
“Well, do you have a second to talk to me or not?” Luciano asked.
Going out on the town with his older brother wasn’t exactly his idea of fun, but if he could get Antonio to cut loose, Luciano imagined that he’d get back to the man he’d used to be. Fun loving, adventurous, charismatic….
A weekend in Los Angeles would do them both good.
“I’m listening.” Antonio paused. “Are you at work right now?”
“I’m taking lunch,” Luciano assured him. “I promise, I’m not calling you in front of a client… this time.”
He could only imagine Antonio’s sour face.
“So anyway, I was thinking that at the end of the month, you and me should get out and do something. I haven’t been home in two years, and a reunion is way overdue. You haven’t taken a vacation in what… ever? Since dad died, probably, if I had to guess?”
“You’d be correct.” Antonio wasn’t letting him in. Luciano scowled.
“Well, then come take one with me. End of April. Friday, Saturday, Sunday… maybe even Thursday, if you want to go wild. Or we can get together on Thursday and pack and go out to get whatever we want to bring with us. I feel like liquor is cheaper here. You have any idea?”
“Wait.” Antonio stopped him. “Are you saying that we should leave Vegas to go party somewhere else?”
When he put it like that, the plan sounded stupid. Luciano frowned. “Yeah. We live in Vegas. It’s not the party capital if you live here. In order to really cut loose, you need to get out of the city. Los Angeles sounds like it’d be a fun trip. I’d pay, of course. I just think it’s a shame that I’m back and we haven’t done anything exciting yet. Consider it brother bonding time.”
Antonio was silent, and Luciano was sure he was going to say no.
“I’ll consider it,” Antonio said at last. “I’ll get back to you no later than three days from now. I need to examine my schedule and see what’s required of me. After that, I’ll know whether I can afford the time off or not. I assume I’ll be talking to Melanie about finalizing the plans?”
A thought crossed Luciano’s mind, and he struck it down almost as soon as it did. With how cool and collected Antonio was, always one for maturity and professionalism, he’d be perfectly suited for Melanie.
But even after their disagreement, Luciano didn’t want to lose her.
Melanie had been faithful to him for the last two years. She’d put up with his bullshit and hadn’t called him out on being a sarcastic asshole when really, he deserved to be raked over the coals. Beyond that, in a guilty way, he liked her.
There was no question that when she was around, he felt differently. It wasn’t like how it had been with Cassandra—and it would never be—but there was something there that Luciano couldn’t ignore.
He didn’t want Antonio to have that.
“You can call me directly and we’ll talk. I know it’s easier to get in touch with her most of the time, but I’ll be sure to look out for your call.”
“Alright, then.” Antonio paused. “Is that all you wanted to talk about?”
“No. What do you think about going out for dinner?” Luciano drank from his beer again. He could use the distraction.
“Tonight? Aren’t you eating now?”
“Mmhm. After work. We could get Porter to open the kitchen for us again and eat some bar food. What do you think?”
Porter glared at him from where he was dusting bottles, and Luciano smirked at him. He knew Porter didn’t mind.
“Yes.” Antonio was devoted to his business, but it was rare that he passed up a chance to go out to eat. “I’ll meet you there. We can talk about some of the things I’ve been trying to get through to you.”
“Melanie’s been passing along your messages, so don’t worry about that.”
“She sent me an email update,” Antonio agreed. “But it still doesn’t change the fact that she was vague at best about whether you needed help. If you do, let me know. Losing Giovanni and Riley, even temporarily, has been harder on the shop than I would have liked. We have the funds to hire a temporary assistant manager to help you along if you need it.”
“No need.” Luciano chewed on the inside of his lip thoughtfully. “I’m fine.”
He wasn’t. He really wasn’t. But with any luck, he wouldn’t be staying in Las Vegas for much longer.
There was a big, beautiful world out there for him to explore, and none of it was tainted with the difficult memories that wracked him with grief and kept him awake at night.
The rest of the day was strained. Melanie did her best to come across as chipper and unaffected by their argument, but Luciano knew she was hurting. Even after apologizing for his rudeness, he felt like he’d done her a disservice.
It was a miracle she hadn’t walked out on the spot.
By the time the end of the day rolled around, Luciano was eager to get out. Thorn Tattoo opened late in the morning and closed late at night, and by the time they locked the doors and started final cleanup, the sun had already long set and a chill had set in. Luciano enjoyed the frostiness of night, which wouldn’t last for much longer with spring so close. Nowhere else in the United States had the same feel. When he left Vegas for good, he was going to miss the desert climate.
Like Antonio had promised, he was waiting at the bar when Luciano arrived after work. Stri
kingly handsome in his tailored designer suit, brown hair slicked back, Antonio looked every inch the successful businessman he was. He could never understand how his brother managed to look so polished after putting in twelve-to-fourteen hour days but there he was, probably looking as fresh as when he first left the house that morning. When he saw Luciano, he nodded. The two of them walked in silence into the bar and settled at the counter.
Porter was gone, but a busty young woman Luciano didn’t recognize was quick to serve them their drinks. In Vegas, every bartender was glamorous. It was the land of the beautiful and the superficial.
Melanie’s kind of beauty didn’t belong there, and yet Luciano found her all the more stunning for it.
He frowned into his beer and tried to place that thought. It wasn’t like him to think about her in that way. The two years she’d spent working as his assistant had created a buffer he tried not to let slip.
Antonio didn’t give him long to think about it.
“You look… pained.” Antonio slid his credit card across the table, and the bartender started his tab. When Luciano tried to do the same Antonio stopped him. It looked like tonight drinks would be on his older brother. “What’s happening?”
“I’m not happy to be back.” There was no point in denying the truth. Luciano clenched his hands into fists, each of them on either side of his thighs. “It’s harder than I thought it would be. The place where the accident happened is right outside the shop. Every time I go in or out, I have to look away, or all I see is twisted metal.”
For a moment, Antonio said nothing. Their drinks were brought to them, and he sipped at his beer. Luciano didn’t know if he was looking for the right words to say, or if he was trying to drop the subject.
“It’s like when father died,” Antonio said softly. “None of us were ready for it, but sometimes life happens, and not always in ways we want it to.”
“I wasn’t ready to walk down the aisle with dad,” Luciano replied dryly. “It’s a little different, Antonio. I loved Dad, but we all knew it was coming eventually. Cassandra had decades left to live.”