by Sally Warner
“Shut up about my feelings, dude!” he bellows, forgetting for a second to be quiet, he is so mad.
“What else can I say?” I ask him, shrugging, even though my heart is pounding.
“Nothing,” he says, easing off a little as he sees the principal coming toward us down the hall in that fast walk grown-ups do when they don’t want to look silly by running.
“Okay, then,” I say in a hurry.
“I won’t touch you during school today, tattletale EllRay,” Jared whispers, “but you better meet me in Pennypacker Park right after school, if you know what’s good for you. So I can beat you up.”
Only Jared could say something like this and think it makes sense, because why would someone know what’s good for them and want to get beat up?
But you know what? I think I’m going to do it.
I’ll go.
And I’m going to FIGHT BACK!
Because then, the whole trouble between Jared Matthews and me will be over with once and for all, and we can start living our normal lives again—whatever those lives were like. I can barely remember.
And even if someone catches us fighting, my dad can’t yank Disneyland away from me, because the fight won’t be in school.
It’s going to be after school
I will have kept my part of the bargain.
14
EUSTACE B. PENNYPACKER MEMORIAL PARK
I don’t know who Eustace B. Pennypacker is, or was, but he has a terrible park. It’s mostly just boring green grass with clover and bees, and a bunch of trees.
You’d think he could have thrown in a playground while he was at it, but NO.
That is why, even though this park is only a block away from our school, kids hardly ever hang out there.
It is probably also why Jared chose the park for our final fight.
No one will see us, and no one will ever find out what happened the afternoon before EllRay Jakes went to Disneyland, sore—but happy.
No one except Jared’s loyal friend and robot Stanley Washington.
Oops. I forgot about him.
That’s okay, though, because even if Stanley takes a swing at me too, I’ll be getting whomped so hard by Jared that I probably won’t even notice.
And at least I’ll be fighting back!
I am sick of looking over my shoulder and washing my hands all the time.
I have gone all day long without telling anyone what is going to happen, because I am not a tattletale, no matter what Jared thinks.
Also, it wouldn’t do any good, because this fight is between Jared and me—and Stanley, probably, but there’s nothing I can do about that.
Jared needs to get even with me because of Heather, crazy as that sounds, and I guess he thinks whaling on me will help.
And if that’s what it takes to end our one-sided feud, okay.
“Hey, Jakes. Hey, sweetie,” Stanley yells, popping out from behind a far-off tree like some goofy, floppy-haired jack-in-the-box. He looks either nervous or excited, I can’t tell which, and he keeps looking over his shoulder. “Come over here,” he says.
I walk over to him as slowly as I can without going backward, because even though I want to get this fight over with, I am not exactly looking forward to it.
Who would be?
“Hey, Stanley,” I say, nearing the tree. I am hoping that maybe Jared has decided to call the whole thing off, and Stanley is supposed to tell me.
And then—SPROING! Jared jumps down out of the tree like a big old stinkbug landing on an ant, if that’s what stinkbugs do.
And we go rolling across the grass. POW, POW! Jared punches me in the side, right where my poor skinny ribs are sticking out.
And I grab hold of his shirt and try to get in a punch or two of my own.
THUNK! THUNK!
My fist connects first with Jared’s nose by accident, and then it sinks into his stomach, and Jared grunts. He is madder than ever now, and a little bit surprised that I am fighting back, judging by what I can see of the look on his face.
I would hit him again, only I never get the chance because we are rolling around on the ground some more, and all our arms are busy.
And all of a sudden, my mouth is full of Eustace B. Pennypacker’s memorial grass—and some of his dirt, too, as Jared grinds my face into the lawn. “Fuh,” I say, trying to spit it out.
“No spitting,” Stanley cries, as if he is the referee, and this is supposed to be some really fair fight.
Yeah, right!
I would explain to them that I’m not spitting, only I never get the chance.
“I’ll teach you not to spit on me,” Jared says— and he wrestles me onto my back and gets ready to spit in my face.
IN MY FACE!
As if spitting on a person will teach that person not to spit!
I would point out how messed-up this is, only I do not get the chance.
There is a roaring sound in my ears, and I shut my eyes and especially my mouth, and I get ready for the worst, only the worst never happens.
Instead, the roaring sound grows louder and louder, and I suddenly realize that it is kids, kids, and more kids, and they are swarming around us: Kevin McKinley, and Corey Robinson, who is supposed to be at swim practice, and Fiona McNulty, and Emma McGraw, and Heather Patton, who accidentally started the whole thing and doesn’t even know it, and Annie Pat Masterson.
There are other kids here too, from different classes, and I don’t even know their names.
How did they find out?
Stanley. I just know it. That’s why he was looking over his shoulder!
Maybe he’s not so bad after all.
“Get off him, Jared,” Kevin shouts, grabbing Jared by the neck of his sweaty red T-shirt. “You’re huge compared to EllRay. It’s just not right,” he yells.
But Jared wriggles away.
“Big meanie,” Emma says, aiming a kick or two toward Jared’s shins, which I wish she wouldn’t do, because how does that make me look?
But Emma can’t help herself. She is what my dad would call “a hothead.” He says it like it’s a bad thing.
“Oh, poor Jared,” Heather cries out to the excited crowd of kids. “Look, his nose is bleeding!”
And those are the magic words, I guess, especially coming from her, because Jared suddenly lets me go.
I scramble to my feet before he changes his mind.
“You bully,” Heather says, whirling to face me. “Why don’t you pick on someone your own size, EllRay Jakes?”
Which is when everyone starts to laugh.
Including Jared Matthews, luckily!
And poof, just like that our fight is over.
15
SURPRISE
“Everyone all set?” my dad asks us very early the next morning, after buckling Alfie into her car seat, because—we are on our way to Disneyland!
This will be the best treat ever.
And I earned it the hard way. I am so sore I can barely walk—but Disneyland will cure me.
“I’m all set,” Alfie announces. She is dressed up in her favorite outfit: ruffled shirt, pink skirt, lacy white socks, and pink sneakers. “I’m going to meet Minnie Mouse,” she tells us, looking excited, but also a little scared. “And she’s famous.”
“Maybe you’ll meet Minnie,” my mom tells her, I guess because she doesn’t want Alfie to be disappointed if Minnie Mouse is on vacation in Cabo or something.
“I’ll meet her, all wight,” Alfie says grimly.
And for everyone’s sake, I hope Minnie is on the job today.
“Well, let’s keep our fingers crossed,” Dad says, sounding a lot more excited than I thought he would. He’s even wearing a shirt and sweater instead of a tie. “But leave some room, EllRay,” he adds. “Because we’re picking someone else up.”
“Who?” Alfie asks.
“Yeah, who?” I ask.
My dad looks at me over his shoulder and smiles. “It’s a surprise,” he says, speaking mainly
to me.
And it really, really is.
“Hey, Jared,” I say a few minutes later, trying to make my voice sound normal as Jared Matthews clambers into the backseat of our car. This leaves me sitting in the middle, exactly where I hate to sit.
This is like a nightmare come true.
Jared and I accidentally solve everything all by ourselves, but it’s for nothing? We have that stupid fight, but then they throw us together for a whole entire day?
I guess the grown-ups don’t know it, but that’s like expecting Jared and me to walk across a bridge that we just built out of white paste and Popsicle sticks.
We are DOOMED!
“Jared, we called your parents on Thursday night to suggest that you join us,” Dad says as Jared buckles himself in. “And they agreed that it was a good way for you and EllRay to get to know each other a little better. Ms. Sanchez thought so, too. But we decided to keep it a secret—from both of you.”
Okay. They called Jared’s parents on Thursday night—before our big fight on Friday in Eustace B. Pennypacker Memorial Park.
Of course, the grown-ups haven’t heard about the fight yet, I remind myself. For now, at least, it’s still stealth. All they know is that he might have tripped me once. But the side of Jared’s nose where I accidentally socked him yesterday afternoon is black and blue, I am secretly glad to see.
“Hey,” he says to Alfie and me in greeting, not knowing where to look. He touches his sore nose. “I told my folks I fell off my skateboard,” he whispers, before I can even ask.
In the front seat, Mom opens her purse, pulls out her little lipstick mirror, and peeks back at Jared and me—probably to see if we are silently strangling each other yet.
So far so good, Mom. Mostly because I’m still in shock.
“Who’s that?” Aflie says, taking her wet thumb out of her mouth and waving it toward Jared with some suspicion.
“Oh, sorry. This is Jared Matthews,” I tell her, making the introduction. “He’s in my class at school. This is my little sister Alfleta,” I say to Jared, introducing Alfie politely—just in case Mom and Dad are listening, which I’m sure they are. “It means ‘beautiful elf,’” I explain.
“Hi,” Jared mumbles to Alfie.
Alfie scowls. “EllWay told me about you one time,” she says to Jared. “He said you were the meanest boy in his class.”
“Alfleta,” Mom scolds from the front seat. “That’s enough. Behave yourself.”
“That’s okay, Mrs. Jakes,” Jared says. What a kiss-up!
“She didn’t mean it, Mom,” I fib.
“I did too mean it,” Alfie objects loudly. “EllWay and me decided that boy is just as bad as Suzette.” I can tell that Jared does not like being compared to a girl, but there’s not much he can do about it.
“I thought you and Suzette were friends again,” I say to Alfie.
“Oh yeah,” she says, remembering. “But maybe not next week.”
“Well, that’s kind of like Jared and me,” I say, hoping to shut her up. “We’re okay now.”
Temporarily, at least.
“All wight,” she says, accepting this.
Jared and I look at each other for a second, but we don’t say anything until my dad is on the freeway heading north, and Alfie has gone back to sucking her thumb and twiddling the end of a soft black braid. She stares dreamily out the car window at the hills racing by. She is nearly asleep.
“I know you didn’t want me to come,” Jared growls, keeping his voice low.
I think hard for a couple of minutes about what to tell him, because if I lie and say that I’m really happy he’s here, maybe he will leave me alone for the rest of the year. Or for a few weeks, anyway,
Or I can tell him the truth and take my chances.
“Not really,” I finally admit.
“Well, I didn’t even want to come, when they told me this morning,” Jared whispers gruffly. “So don’t think you’re doing me any favors. I don’t owe you, EllRay.”
“Everything all right back there?” Dad asks, glancing at us in his rearview mirror.
“Everything’s fine,” I report. “Alfie’s asleep, and we’re just talking quietly.”
After Dad gets busy driving again, Jared and I exchange glares. “I’m glad Stanley told,” he mutters, his voice even quieter than before. “That’s why all those kids came running to the park yesterday. They wanted to see you get it, EllRay.”
“They did not,” I tell him, also keeping my voice low. “They didn’t care what they saw, as long as it was something exciting, for a change. And anyway, maybe Stanley told because he likes to do stuff behind your back. And all those kids saw was you, getting a bloody nose. Even Heather Patton saw it,” I remind him. “You’re welcome,” I add, trying for a little sarcasm.
My heart is thunking so hard in my chest that I can practically see it through my San Diego Padres T-shirt, the one Jared wishes he had, but at least I am defending myself again.
I think the days of me washing my hands for no reason are over.
Jared scowls, but he doesn’t say anything more.
This is going to be some weird treat, that’s for sure. My stomach is doing flip-flops already—and not the good, scary-ride kind.
Great plan, grown-ups! Just when most of the bad feelings between Jared and me were over because of our fight, which we both won, in a way, you went and made things worse by trying to make us have fun together.
Thanks a lot.
16
TEMPORARY
If there is one thing that no one likes about Disneyland, I remember about twenty minutes after we first walk down Main Street, it is the lines you have to wait in to get on the rides.
Long, boring, zigzagging lines.
Then, when you finally, finally get to the front of the line, all of a sudden there is a crazy scramble to jump on the ride, and then WHOOSH, the ride is over.
The whoosh part can be really fun, though—even when Jared Matthews is sitting there next to you like a tree stump, which sometimes happens because of the crazy scramble part.
Of course, Mom and Dad were probably planning on Jared going with me on every single ride. They probably imagined that we would slowly learn to like each other, and maybe even become friends, but even parents can’t argue when the official ride people shoo you onto a ride when it’s finally your turn. Not when there are a thousand people in line behind you.
As the morning goes on, though, even I have to admit that the invisible coating of ice that has been covering both Jared and me—like the candy coating on an M&M—is beginning to melt a little.
But then, just after lunch, “I want Minnie ears,” Alfie starts whining after we have been in line for twenty minutes for the pirates ride, and Jared and I exchange worried looks.
“She has a meltdown every afternoon,” I tell Jared gloomily. “She still takes naps, that’s the thing.”
“Who are you talking about?” Alfie asks, sounding suspicious.
“You stay in line,” Dad tells Jared, Mom, and me. “I’ll take Alfie and go find a Minnie hat.”
“No, Warren,” Mom says. “We’ll all go with you. We have to stick together, or someone’s going to get lost.”
But it’s Disneyland, I want to tell them as we get ready to lose our very good place in line. How bad could it be if a very-mature-for-his-age kid, like me, got lost? I could live here forever!
“I have an idea, Louise,” Dad says. “I think EllRay and Jared can be on their own for a while, if they promise to stick together. We could try it for an hour, maybe, and see how it goes.”
We get to be alone? In Disneyland? I can hardly believe what I am hearing!
Even Jared is looking excited.
“I don’t know,” Mom says, looking worried.
“You could lend EllRay your cell phone,” Dad suggests gently. “He’ll call me on my cell every fifteen minutes to check in.”
I’d call every minute if he asked me to!
Jared and I both hold our breath.
“Well, okay,” Mom finally agrees as Alfie starts to tug her away from the line. “Here’s my phone, EllRay. Don’t lose it.”
Mom’s cell phone is yellow, sparkly, and very girly, which is embarrassing, but I slip it into my deepest pocket and swap excited, happy glances with Jared, my temporary friend.
“We’ll meet here in exactly one hour,” Dad says, tapping his watch.
“Okay,” I tell him.
“Okay,” Jared mumbles happily.
And we’re off!
Being at Disneyland with Jared wasn’t so bad, I think sleepily on the way home. In fact, I don’t want to exaggerate or anything, but it was really, really fun.
There were no wedgies, no playing keep-away, no knuckle-grinding, no nothing.
And even though something bad will probably happen again next week, especially when the grown-ups hear about the fight at Eustace B. Pennypacker Memorial Park, a fight that to Jared and me is old news, things are okay for now.
And that’s good enough for me!
WHAT HAPPENS TO ELLRAY IN HIS NEXT
ADVENTURE? TURN THE PAGE TO
READ A CHAPTER FROM
Ellray Jakes
is a Rock Star!
MY CRYSTAL—CLEAR IDEA
On Monday night before bed, as my mom is giving Alfie her usual three-towel bath, I wander into Dad’s home office to look around—because I kind of miss him.
Also, I usually don’t get to go in there unless I’m in trouble.
Even though almost anyone would think that being a geology professor is boring, my dad’s office is pretty cool. The wall opposite his desk is completely covered with wood shelves that are so narrow an apple would feel fat sitting there. All my dad’s favorite small rock specimens are on these shelves, and each one is carefully labeled. The rocks are from all over the world—Asia, South America, North America—and he collected each specimen himself.
My dad has been everywhere.
My favorite shelves are the ones nearest the window, because those hold the crystals. Dad put the crystals there so that sunlight will shine on them first thing in the morning. He says it’s a nice way to start the day.