Fueled now by anger, I threw caution to the wind and rushed upstairs to their bedrooms, ready to fight to the death, if needed. When I found them both alone and safely sleeping, I whispered a silent prayer and then continued my search. When the rest of the house appeared empty, I sat down at the kitchen table and allowed myself to cry.
What do I do? What in the hell do I do?
I was so torn. The man had threatened to kill my children if I reported anything. I was certain that Jerry was responsible, so reporting the incident to the police wasn’t even an option. I also considered calling Jake, but I knew he’d probably go after Jerry, which might provoke another visit from that monster. My gut told me he’d make good on his promise, too, if he returned.
I stood up and began to pace, trying to weigh my options. In the end, I decided to change the locks on all my doors and look into getting a gun.
Frightened and defeated, I stayed up the rest of the night, the bat on my lap and a butcher knife in my hand. When the morning sun began to rise, I put them both away and began making breakfast.
Chapter Sixteen
After the kids left for school, I took a shower with the bathroom door locked and the butcher knife next to my shampoo. I wasn’t sure what my assailant was capable of, and remembering the way he’d felt me up, I wasn’t about to let my guard down.
As I finished drying my hair, someone rang the doorbell. I stepped cautiously to my front door and peeked out the side window.
It was Jake.
I opened the door. “Hi.”
“Morning,” he said, staring down at my clothing, a loose tank top and jeans.
I cringed, suddenly remembering the morning jog he’d talked me into.
“You might want to change if you plan on joining me. Sweating in jeans isn’t the most pleasant thing in the world.” He was dressed in grey sweats and a dark blue T-shirt, looking ready to tackle the world.
I opened my mouth to respond, but nothing came out. It was an absolute struggle not to blurt out everything that had happened during the night, especially at that particular moment. He looked so confident and powerful, like he could handle anything thrown at him. But my children’s lives were involved and I couldn’t take any risks.
His eyes narrowed. “Lindsey, are you okay?”
I cleared my throat and produced a weak smile. “Yes, I’m fine.”
He studied my face. “Did he show up last night?”
My heart skipped a beat. “What do you mean?”
“Did Scott give you trouble last night?”
I exhaled. “No, I haven’t spoken to him since the other night, actually.”
He frowned and rubbed his chin. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I told you I’m fine. Why do you ask?”
“I don’t know, you just seem… tense.”
I shrugged. “I’m okay, just had a hard time sleeping last night.”
He nodded. “So, I take it you’re probably not energized enough for a run?”
“No, I’m sorry. I have a lot of errands to run today, ones that can’t wait. What about tomorrow?”
“Okay. I guess I’ll just have to suffer my own company this morning,” he pouted.
Watching a hunk like him pout over me was almost enough to make me change my mind, but I wanted to switch my locks. I wouldn’t feel even remotely safe until I did.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I promise I’ll get more sleep tonight and join you in the morning. Same time?”
“Same time.”
“Okay, well, I’ll see you,” I said, stepping backwards. As I was about to shut the door, he stuck his foot inside, blocking me from doing it. I opened it back up and gave him a puzzled look.
“You would tell me if anything was bothering you, right?”
His smile was disarming, and almost made me falter. “Sure,” I answered, softly.
From the look in his eyes, I knew he wasn’t really convinced. That wasn’t good.
I stepped forward and touched his arm. “Jake, I just have so much going on in my life, with my husband and trying to find a job. It’s exhausting, to say the least.”
He stared at my hand and then our eyes locked. “Okay,” he said. “Just remember, I’m here for you if you need someone to talk or a shoulder to lean on.”
I nodded.
“Fuck it,” he muttered, pulling me into his arms and holding me against his firm chest.
I released a sigh and closed my eyes. It felt good to be held by someone solid and so totally masculine. It even gave me a sense of security for the first time in days. Unfortunately, I also knew it was a false sense of security.
“Sorry,” he murmured into my hair. “You just looked like you could use one of these.”
“Actually, you were right,” I whispered against his chest. “Thank you.”
He tightened his arms around me. “You smell good,” he said.
“So do you,” I answered, catching a whiff of Irish Spring and toothpaste; he smelled like he’d just gotten out of the shower. An image of Jake with a towel around his waist and water dripping down his washboard stomach flashed through my head, and something in my own stomach went ‘swoosh.’
“I suppose I should let you go. We don’t want the neighbors gossiping,” he teased.
I giggled nervously and stepped away from him. “Well, thanks.”
“It’s the least I can do. Although, I have to admit, it wasn’t all for you,” he said, his eyes burning into mine.
Before I could respond, he turned and left me standing on the porch, my mind buzzing with questions. I watched as he took off running down the street and wondered what the hell I was getting myself into now.
***
After I went to the hardware store and purchased new locks for the house, I decided to stop into a local gun shop I’d passed many times throughout the years. When I finally talked myself into getting out of my SUV and walking inside, I was not really prepared for the prices or how many types of guns there were to choose from. By the time I was approached by a salesperson, my head was spinning.
“First time in a gun shop?” asked the clerk, who didn’t look old enough to handle a gun, let alone sell one.
I smiled. “Is it that obvious?”
He swept his hand over his floppy red hair and smiled. “Oh…just a little.”
“Well, I am a little overwhelmed,” I admitted.
“It’s very understandable if you’ve never shopped for a gun before. What are your needs?
I raised my eyebrows.
What are my needs? Far too many to count.
“What I meant was, why do you want a gun?”
“Um, for protection.”
“Okay. Have you ever shot a gun before?”
I shook my head. “I just want a handgun that’s easy to use and doesn’t cost a fortune.”
He nodded and then began walking to one of the cases. “Let me show you one of our most popular revolvers. It’s easy to load and unload, and the price is pretty reasonable.”
“Okay, thank you.”
He took out his keys and pulled out a small silver gun with a black handle. “This is a Taurus Ultra-Light Thirty-Eight Special. It’s fast, reliable, and easy to carry.”
It was also three hundred and fifty dollars. Luckily, I still had one credit card that wasn’t maxed out.
I took the gun and held it. Even without bullets it felt so powerful in my hands. Powerful and a little scary.
He nodded towards the gun. “Before you fire that bad boy, we recommend you take some of our gun classes. We also have a shooting range in the back of our store, as well, for target practice.”
I nodded. “Okay. So, you’ll teach me how to shoot this thing?”
“Definitely. We can start right now with the basics.”
Then, for the next ten minutes, he took me into the back and gave me a quick lesson on how to load and unload the gun, as well as what I’d need to do to actually clean it.
When he was fin
ished, I took a deep breath. “Okay, I’ll take it,” I said.
“Well,” he replied, grabbing a clipboard from underneath the counter, “fill out this form and when your background check is approved, you’ll be able to purchase the gun.”
I bit the side of my lip. “How long does it take?”
The young man shrugged. “A day or two. We’ll call you when it’s received.”
Crap.
I had no choice but to wait. “Okay,” I said, nodding. “Let’s do it.”
After I filled out the paperwork and left the store, my phone began to vibrate in my purse.
Scott.
Great, just what I needed.
“What is it?” I asked, getting into my SUV.
He chuckled. “Well, hello to you, too.”
I closed my eyes and leaned back in my seat. “Sorry, I didn’t sleep well last night.”
He sighed. “I’m sure it’s been difficult for you.”
Do you think?
I almost went off on him but it was getting old. I was tired of arguing. “So, are you still at your parents’?”
“For now. I was hoping you’d let me come home.”
I rolled my eyes. He was such a broken record.
“Don’t start this again,” I warned.
“Look, I know I made a mistake but I swear to you, it will never happen again.”
“I…I just can’t trust you,” I said. “After everything that’s happened. Plus, I’ll never be able to get those images out of my head.”
“We can go to counseling,” he said. “I’ll do whatever it takes to earn your trust back.”
“Scott...”
“Please,” he said, softly. “I miss you and the kids.”
“I really need more time to think about this,” I said. “Rushing me isn’t going to help the situation.”
He sighed. “Well, can I at least see our children?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Friday night?”
“Sure. Why don’t you pick them up after six?”
“I thought maybe we could all have dinner together?”
I groaned. “No, Scott. I need some space right now. Just, pick them up and spend time with them. They need you.”
“Fine.”
“I have to go,” I said.
“Lindsey, no matter what happens, just remember, I love you and… I swear, I’ve never stopped.”
You sure have an odd way of showing it.
“Goodbye, Scott,” I mumbled, hanging up.
***
It was just after twelve when I arrived back home. The house appeared empty, but my nerves were on edge as I stepped through the door. Expecting the worst, I gripped my bat tightly and searched the house. Finding it empty, I grabbed a screwdriver from the garage and began changing all of the locks. As I was on my knees finishing up with the front door, Jake approached me. This time he was dressed casually in dark chinos and a white polo shirt.
“Good idea,” he said, nodding towards the locks. “I was going to suggest that myself.”
I stood up and smiled. “I suppose I should have done it right away.”
“Well, you’ve had plenty of other things on your mind.”
“Day off?” I asked, staring at his casual clothes.
“Yeah. I was thinking about grabbing a bite to eat. Have you had lunch yet?”
At the mention of food, I realized I was famished. I hadn’t eaten anything since last night, and even that wasn’t very much.
“I could eat,” I said, hearing my stomach start to growl.
“How about joining me?”
“I don’t know…”
“Come on, my treat again. You can buy next time.”
I sighed. “Well, okay. I’d better change.”
His caramel eyes swept over me, lingering a little longer than necessary on my chest. “You look great. Let’s just go.”
I looked down at my clothing – both the tank and jeans were beginning to hang in a very unflattering way since my appetite had basically disappeared in the last week. “Thanks, but I’m definitely not going anywhere with you in this. Just give me five minutes, please?”
He shrugged. “Okay, if it makes you feel more comfortable.”
I opened the door and motioned him inside. “Come on in and wait. It’s much cooler.”
“Thanks.”
He followed me in and I was suddenly very much aware of how incredibly sexy he was and how very alone we were.
I cleared my throat. “Uh, I’ll be right back.”
He sat down on the couch and spread his arms across the back. “Take your time.”
I hurried to the bedroom and went through my closet. In the very back was a white and blue sundress I hadn’t worn in a couple of years. Thankfully, it still looked new and wasn’t too outdated. As I zipped up the back and studied myself in the mirror, I sighed with relief. The few pounds I’d shed in the last few days had allowed me to fit comfortably in the dress.
“Wow,” smiled Jake as I stepped back into the living room, ten minutes later. I’d also applied a little makeup and managed to twist my hair into a chignon. “You look very lovely.”
“Oh, well thank you,” I said, brushing a loose strand of hair away from my eyes.
He stood up. “So, do you like seafood?”
I raised my eyebrows. “For lunch?”
His eyes glittered with amusement. “Why not?”
I broke into a grin. “Exactly, why not?”
An hour later we sat across from each other, sharing a large shrimp cocktail appetizer at “Benjamin’s On the Lake.”
“So,” he asked. “Have any luck finding a job yet?”
“Not yet, although Darcy has a couple of leads for me; she’s coming over tonight to help me with my resume.”
He took a swig of his beer. “Sounds like Darcy is a very good friend.”
I smiled. “She is. We’ve known each other for a long time. We’ve certainly been through a lot together.”
“Is she married?”
I grinned. “Why? Are you interested?”
He shook his head. “No. I was just curious.”
“She’s going through a difficult divorce herself, but she’s definitely available. Actually, she has expressed an interest in you, so if you change your mind –”
He chuckled. “No. I’m interested in someone else.”
“Oh?” I asked, thinking of the cute brunette from the other day.
His eyes locked with mine. “Yeah but she has too much on her plate right now. However, I’m a patient guy and she’s worth the wait.”
My eyes widened. “Well, I uh…”
He put a hand over mine. “Shit, I didn’t embarrass you, did I?”
The warmth of his hand on mine sent a heat wave all the way down to my toes. “No,” I said. “You just shocked the hell out of me.”
He squeezed my hand and released it. “Sorry. I just wanted you to know that I’m interested.”
I stared at him, stunned. He was incredibly good-looking and could probably have anyone he wanted. “I don’t know what to say. I guess I’m just kind of surprised.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Why?”
“Well, you’re attractive, single, and I’m sure you have women waiting in line to go out with you. I’m just a little confused as to why you’d be interested in me.”
He leaned forward and his eyes burned into mine. “You really have no clue.”
I chuckled as I raised my Bloody Mary to my lips. “No clue?”
“How bad I want you,” he said, his eyes making a hot trail from my lips to my cleavage.
I choked and the spicy liquid burned all the way down my throat.
“You okay?” he asked, sitting up straighter as I hacked and sputtered all over my napkin.
I’m sorry…spicy drink,” I replied hoarsely.
The gleam in his eyes told me he knew better. “Oh, I thought it was something else.”
Feeling flushed, I fanne
d my face with my napkin. “Well, okay, maybe that too.”
He leaned back and smiled. “Sorry. It’s just that you had this look earlier today and it drove me crazy.”
I raised my eyebrows. “What look?”
“This look” he said, rubbing his chin with an amused expression. “Like you were wondering...”
I raised my eyebrows. “Wondering what?”
His eyes darkened. “If you’d have the guts to sleep with me.”
I felt an instant surge of hunger between my legs and wanted nothing more than to jump over the table, sit on his lap, and lick the beer from his moist lips with everything I had. But then I remembered I was still a married woman.
I snaked my hand away from his. “Jake…” I answered, my cheeks burning.
He let out a long breath. “Shit, I’m sorry. That was probably out of line.”
I sighed. “Actually, I’m totally flattered. But…”
Jake took another swig of his beer. “I know. It’s too soon. I totally understand that. It’s just…”
“What?”
He took a deep breath. “Okay, I don’t want to freak you out or embarrass you any further but…I just can’t stop thinking about you. You’re constantly on my mind, which is strange, because I know we’ve only just met.”
I bit my lower lip. “You’re constantly thinking about me?”
He smiled. “Yes, and dammit, you’re making me lose sleep.”
I blushed. “Sorry, I guess.”
He reached over and brushed a strand of hair from my lips, his eyes burning into mine. “I just keep thinking about the way your eyes dance when you’re laughing, or,” he touched my lip, “how your teeth graze your lower lip when you’re nervous. But mostly,” he said, leaning back. “I look at you and everything you have to offer, and wonder how in the world Scott could have been such a fool.”
“Well, thank you,” I whispered, my stomach feeling all fluttery inside.
“You deserve to have someone who appreciates you. Who will be there for you through thick and thin, and never take you for granted.”
I was so flattered that I didn’t know what to say.
He sighed and went on. “Maybe it’s because I’ve been through a similar situation and feel your pain, or finally know what I want in life, hell I don’t know. What I do know is that I want to get to know you more, in every way.”
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