by K Leitch
Maggie grabbed her hands, ‘Oh God Helen do you think she meant it? Do you think we’re going to get her back?’
‘I think so Maggie, I really do,’ Helen smiled tremulously. ‘I told her about my friend Christine Wicks, she used to work for Relate as a marriage guidance therapist, but she has just started taking on people suffering with depression, addiction you know that sort of stuff. She’s a lovely girl really non-judgemental and kind so I know she’d be able to get through to Carla if she’ll give her the chance. Anyway I’m taking Carla to meet her tomorrow, so fingers crossed,’ she held up crossed fingers.
‘Oh my God I hope so,’ Maggie said blowing her nose, ‘I’ve missed her so much and I’ve been so angry with her, which has just made me angry with myself because I know the poor darling has been through more than any of us could possibly imagine. But somehow I have always relied on Carla to be strong and calm. Even if we all fell apart I needed her to stay strong which is soooo unfair of meeee,’ Maggie finished on another wail and sobbed into her hanky again.
‘You know what Maggie, you’ve hit the nail on the head,’ Tracy said welling up again. ‘I’ve been just as bad, only focusing on the things she was saying and doing, rather than why she’d ended up like that. I am such a self-centred cow…oh…sob snort…poor poor Carla…sniff sniff gulp.’ Tracy grabbed a napkin from the next table and blew her nose noisily on it, much to the amusement of the occupants of said table, who were looking at the trio of sobbing women with wide-eyed bewilderment.
Helen calmed down first and hugged the other girls, ‘Well it's early days, but we now have a chance to make things right again for her don’t we?’
Maggie squeezed her hand and nodded pulling herself together, Duncan came over a worried look on his face.
‘What’s up love?’ he asked Maggie crouching down next to her.
Maggie gave him a watery smile and threw her arms round his neck, ‘Nothing darling…nothing that another jug of your glorious Pimms won’t sort out.’
‘Oh I get it, Witchy stuff…I’m just good for the alcohol I know, one jug coming up,’ he said rolling his eyes and wandering off to fetch their drinks.
‘What was it that brought her to her senses Helen, did she say?’ Tracy asked a moment later.
Helen pulled a face. ‘Well she wasn’t making much sense but I get the feeling that she’d got a bit too drunk one night and it had disgusted her…or scared her rather. She certainly sounded scared of what she might end up doing if she didn’t get some help, but she didn’t tell me anymore than that. Maybe we’ll find out one day…I’m just glad something made her think.’
‘What about James and the kids, did she talk about them?’ Maggie said smiling up at Duncan as he set another jug on their table.
‘Not really,’ Helen said taking a glass from Maggie, ‘she said she knew she had a lot of making up to do and she is desperate to see them but I think she’s scared to, until she knows she’s going to be okay.’
Maggie and Tracy thought about this for a moment.
‘Oh God, let it all work out,’ Tracy said.
‘If there’s any justice in the world, it will love,’ Maggie said with a smile, raising her glass in a silent toast to Carla.
CHAPTER 41
‘Stop looking at me! Go away and leave me alone, I’m tired… so tired…STOP IT LEWIS, YOU WEIRDO.’
Lola flapped around with her hands as she tried to push her brother away, but he just stood there…watching her. Sometimes he had Leslie with him, but not this time. He never said anything, not even shouting at her, calling her a stupid bitch or a nerdy twat which was what he did most of the time. He was freaking her out…just standing there…staring at her with his cold, cold empty eyes.
Flora Metcalf looked down at the young girl lying on the filthy mattress at her feet. She was burning up Flora could see without touching her, her cheeks were rosy red and her lips dry and cracked. Even though she was asleep, she was thrashing around, calling out to her brother in her delirium, the girl was seriously ill.
Flora told Billy to lift her up and she poured some water into her mouth, causing her to cough and splutter, she waited a moment and gave her some more. The one thing she knew about fever was that you had to keep the patient hydrated. After making sure that she’d taken enough fluid Billy lay her back down and looked up at Flora, his eyes were full of worry and confusion.
‘She don’t look good Miss Metcalf.’ he said shaking his head, ‘is she going to die?’
Flora sighed. ‘She might I suppose,’ she said dispassionately looking down at the girl. ‘But no one can say that we killed her Billy, we have been feeding her and giving her water…if she’s gone and got herself ill, well that’s not our fault is it?’
Billy thought about this seriously for a moment then, his brow clearing, he nodded, ‘We didn’t make her ill did we, she done that to herself.’
‘Right, you grab that filthy old blanket Billy and I’ll wrap her up again in this clean one, then we’ll leave her to sleep…come on lad, leave her be now. You’ve still got to cut those logs up for me and then the front garden needs weeding,’ she added as Billy continued to look down at the sleeping Lola.
Without another word he followed Flora back outside into the sunshine, pushing back the huge rusty bolts to secure the door behind him. Leaving Lola in the pitch black of the air raid shelter with only the staring, accusing eyes of her brother to keep her company.
CHAPTER 42
Lucinda was putting off talking to Maggie. She knew she had to move on, she knew she mustn’t risk bringing Trevor and his brand of evil to Maggie’s door, but she just couldn’t bring herself to leave. A week had passed since she’d met Jenny in Redbank, surely…surely if something was going to happen it would have by now. And the longer nothing happened the easier it was for her to talk herself out of leaving. Why risk losing this lovely home with this lovely family just because something might happen. Because actually even if Jenny let slip that she’d seen Lucinda in Redbank, what good would that do Trevor. She wasn’t in Redbank, she was living six miles away in Kenley. For all Trevor knew she could have just as easily been living in Godstone or Whitefield…no she wasn’t going to leave just yet, she would just make sure that she didn’t actually go into Redbank, she’d stay close to home for a while…it would all be fine… she was panicking for nothing.
‘Is that your toast burning?’ she was jolted out of her tangled thoughts by Dom coming into the kitchen and grabbing two bits of blackened cheese on toast from under the grill.
‘Oh God sorry,’ Lucinda cried jumping up and taking them from him, only to yelp and drop them onto the floor blowing at her fingers. ‘Oh no…sorry… they were hot,’ she babbled dropping to the floor and scrambling around at his feet, trying to clear up the sticky cheesy mess (because of course they’d landed cheese side down).
‘Lucinda…Lucinda, stop it. It doesn’t matter, get up, I’ll get the broom,’ Dom said trying not to laugh as he collected the broom from the utility room.
‘Bloody hell you’re jumpy, what’s got into you?’ he asked as he efficiently swept up the charcoaled toast crumbs.
Lucinda swallowed down the desire to tell him all and pinned a smile on her face. ‘Oh nothing, you just startled me that’s all, I was miles away.’
‘You’ve been worrying again I think,’ he said coming over, taking her hands and looking at her nails which were chewed down to the quick.
He gave her a meaningful look and still holding onto her hands he said, ‘I wish you’d confide in me Lucy. No matter what it is that’s got you so worried, I’m sure if you talked about it, we could find a solution.’ He looked into her eyes, ‘And I’d like to help…I really would.’
Lucinda stared up into his gorgeous dark eyes and wished with all her heart that she could unburden herself on him. The urge to lean her head against his broad shoulders and let him help her was almost overwhelming.
Dom must have sensed her weakening because he pulled her
into a hug, ‘I’m quite trustworthy you know Lucy. You’d be surprised at the secrets that are kept safely locked away in this head of mine. Secrets that I will take with me to my grave, secrets that I would never tell, not even if someone were to offer me a night with Jennifer Aniston (Lucy had found out quite quickly that Dom had quite a crush on the Friends actress). Secrets that…’
‘Okay, okay I get the picture,’ Lucy mumbled into his chest, she pulled away a bit and looked into his kind, smiling face. ‘It’s not that I don’t trust you Dom, I do, probably more than I should do actually given that we haven’t known each other for very long.’ She held up her hand as Dom opened his mouth to say something, ‘But there’s stuff I can’t tell anyone…there’s stuff about me that you don’t know. Oh nothing bad, I’m not an axe murderer or anything. It’s just stuff from my past that’s all and…oh I hope that someday I’ll be able to tell you all about it, but not yet…okay?’
Dom looked at her seriously for a moment, before pulling her close again. ‘Okay…for now,’ he said gruffly, ‘you do know that I like you don’t you Lucy?’ he asked, his chin resting on her head.
Lucy nodded, ‘I like you too Dom,’ she mumbled into his chest, her cheeks flaming.
Dom pulled away enough to lift up her head before his lips touched hers with the gentlest of kisses. They smiled into each other’s eyes for a moment. Lucinda was the first to move away opening up the bread bin and putting a couple more slices into the toaster, there were no more words necessary, but she’d made up her mind about one thing, she was going nowhere…this was a happiness she intended to fight for.
CHAPTER 43 - CARLA
‘You didn’t have to drive me Helen,’ Carla said with a wry smile as she got into Helen’s car, ‘I promised I would see this woman. I wouldn’t have let you down.’
Helen was mortified, ‘Oh God Carla I didn’t think for one minute that you would,’ she said grabbing Carla’s hand, ‘I just thought you might appreciate having someone there with you. I won’t interfere I promise, but sometimes these sessions can be really emotional and you might need a sounding board so….’
Carla squeezed Helen's hand, ‘Chill out love,’ she said, ‘I know you only have my best interests at heart and God knows I don’t deserve it, but I’m so grateful for your help.’
‘I just want to see you back to your old self, Carla…we all do,’ she said starting the car, ‘I remember how low I was after Wills left me, and then Mike…if it hadn’t have been for my friends I might not even be here today. I wouldn’t have met my beautiful Maya, or have Abby, Benji and Andy. So I know okay.’
Carla nodded smiling at her, remembering how desperate Helen had been all those years ago after being betrayed first by her husband and then by the next man she had trusted. Helen had managed to turn her life around and so could she. Although she wasn’t fooled into thinking it was going to be easy, this last week without a drink had been incredibly difficult. But all the girls had helped, trying to be there with her as much as possible and keeping her busy and she had the promise of seeing the children again. She’d been speaking to them every day on the phone which had been really hard, but she knew James was right when he’d insisted on little steps and no drama, and Carla had acknowledged that she owed them that.
She’d been so caught up with her own thoughts, that she was quite surprised when Helen pulled over outside a row of small terraced houses; they had arrived.
Christine Wicks was a tiny little woman who barely came up to Carla’s shoulders and was completely dwarfed by the much taller Helen. They were obviously old friends and greeted each other with warm hugs and talking ten to the dozen, before Helen turned and introduced Carla.
‘Carla, I’m so pleased to meet you,’ she said in her gentle voice, ‘why don’t you go on through into my little office, can I get you a cup of tea, water perhaps?’
Carla declined any refreshment and went through to a little room that overlooked a tiny back garden. She could hear Christine talking to Helen and then the front door shut and a moment later she came into the room closing the door behind her.
Carla felt a bit nervous and shifted about from foot to foot until Christine smiled at her and pulled a small armchair over towards the little desk that sat under the window and asked Carla to sit.
‘Please don’t be nervous Carla,’ she began after taking the chair opposite Carla, ‘all I want you to do is talk, talk about what’s been happening to you, about how you’re feeling, about what you want to achieve…and I’ll just sit here and listen, that’s all there is to it.’
An hour later Carla emerged from the little house and got back into Helen's car. Her eyes were red from weeping and she was still clutching a tissue but she threw her arms around Helen and kissed her soundly on the cheek.
‘Thank you sweetheart…thank you so much,’ Carla babbled tearfully, ‘she was wonderful, she helped me to put it all into perspective. Oh I know that was just the first session and there is a long way to go but I can see it Helen…the light at the end of the tunnel…I can see it now.’
Helen hugged her back, started up the engine and listened to Carla gibbering on about how wonderful Chrissy was all the way home.
CHAPTER 44
Trevor Hibbard was slowly going out of his mind.
He had talk to everyone he could think of, he’d even stopped a couple of her old friends in the street the other day, much to their surprise since they’d been warned off by Trevor himself only a few months ago. Oh everyone was very sympathetic and understood how desperately worried he must be about Lucinda and his child, or at least that’s what they said to his face. He knew that most of them wouldn’t spit on him if he was on fire, and they were probably silently cheering Lucinda on. He’d let them know, discreetly of course, how unbalanced she had become recently and his fears for Katy. That he hated even thinking it but Lucinda may cause the child harm if she wasn’t found soon. They all shook their heads worriedly and wished him luck, but Trevor wasn’t fooled, none of these people knew anything and they wouldn’t have told him if they did.
He was getting nowhere. It was as if Lucinda had just disappeared off the face of the earth. He had toyed with the idea of going to the police, but had thought better of it. The police had been called out too many times after various misunderstandings between him and his wife, they’d probably accuse him of doing away with her and he could do without that hassle on top of everything else.
The trouble was that frustration was fuelling his anger to apocalyptic proportions, and he was having a hard time trying to appear normal. Only a few of his close associates knew the truth and he wanted to keep it that way. It was far too humiliating to admit that his wife had walked out on him and Trevor didn’t do humiliation, just thinking about it started a white hot furnace of rage in his brain, he wanted to rip and tear and maim. He would lie awake at night and think up new and terrifying ways to bring his errant wife to her knees begging for mercy. Oh he would forgive her…eventually, once she’d been suitably punished for making a fool of him. But he couldn’t begin to punish her until he knew where the fuck she was hiding, could he?
This evening he was due to attend a function at the golf club. Gordon Beecham, the chairman was celebrating his sixtieth birthday. Trevor would have loved to get out of it, but his pride and ambition wouldn’t let him. To be invited to the private birthday party of the chairman of the prestigious “Bayside Golf club” was just too essential to his social climbing to ignore. Who would have thought that Trevor Hibbard, son of a dustman, would have received a personal invitation to a private party held by the illustrious Beechams? Of course it helped that Trevor had invested some money into a couple of projects that Gordon had been having trouble finding backers for, and then there had been that spot of bother that Gordon had had with the underage girl. Trevor had sorted that all out with a quiet word to the girl’s parents. But whatever the reasons for the invite, the fact was that he, Trevor had been invited personally to join Gordon and Hillary
Beecham's private party…socially, he had arrived.
The golf clubhouse looked resplendent in the evening sunshine. Hillary had spared no expense and booked a party planner from Exeter no less, to make sure that Gordon’s evening was more spectacular and more lavish that anything else that had been seen in Brixham for a long time, (it certainly had to be better than Judith Williamson’s pathetic little soiree which she had thrown for her daughter’s engagement earlier in the year), and looking round she knew she’d achieved her goal. Silverware sparkled in the light of hundreds of candles, the evening air was scented with the heady fragrance of lush tea roses and lilac. The champagne was flowing and the cream of Devon society had all come to wish Gordon a happy birthday.
Her smile became a little fixed when her gaze fell on the latest arrival however. Why Gordon continued to tolerate that awful little man she couldn’t comprehend, she thought as Trevor wandered towards her with his usual smug calculating smile plastered on his face.
‘Hillary, you’ve out done yourself,’ he said leaning in for an air kiss, ‘the place looks amazing.’
Hillary forced herself to smile, ‘Yes they have done rather well haven’t they?’ she said looking round. ‘We hired Raffety’s of Exeter you know, they always do such a good job. Although they’re not cheap, but then you have to spend to get quality I always find,’ she added with a careless wave of her hand.
‘I bet you spent a bloody fortune on this little lot Hillary,’ Trevor said shaking his head, ‘I wish you’d come to me, I could have got all of this cut-price, being in the entertainments business I’m well known…one word from me and I could have got all this done for next to nothing.’
‘Yes, well I’ll certainly remember that another time Trevor although….’ Hillary began with pursed lips.