by B. N. Toler
I cut my eyes back to Thomas. “Just go,” I say sternly, but it sounds more like a plea.
“You kissed him?” Rhett questions, his voice steady and deep.
“No, he kissed me.” I shake my head defensively. I dart my eyes back and forth between Thomas and Rhett, who remain in a stare down. God, if Rhett is this angry over Thomas kissing me, what will he do if he finds out about Daniel?
“What’s it to you?” Thomas questions him in an equal tone.
“It’s time for you to go.” Rhett steps towards us.
“I’m not leaving her.”
“She’s my responsibility.” Rhett steps closer, daring Thomas to argue again.
“Thomas please go,” I beg.
“Fine.” He slams my purse on the table. In my rush to meet Rhett I had completely forgotten it. “You left this in the dressing room. I found quite a few interesting things in it.”
“You went through my purse?”
“Seems irrelevant in light of what I found.” He slides the security tape towards me.
I can feel the blood drain away from my face as I stare down at the tape. I didn’t want anyone seeing what Andre did to me. My gaze moves to Rhett who is now staring at the tape. I glance back to Thomas, who is watching me.
“You watched it?” I manage to squeak out.
He closes his eyes and the muscles in his jaw tense as if he’s holding back punching something out of anger. He definitely watched it and tears spring to my eyes as I realize there’s another witness to my shame. “I begged you not to go in there.”
I had to shift the conversation to something else, anything else. The last thing I need is Rhett finding out what happened in the VIP room with Andre.
“Thank you for bringing my purse. Now please go.”
“Fine. But we will talk about this.”
He moves towards the door, while he and Rhett eye each other as Thomas passes by. Rhett watches him exit before his burning eyes fall back to me. I can feel the heat of them and I want to melt; so I dribble to the floor in a puddle. The room is spinning a bit and I grab my white mug with trembling hands and gulp my coffee down, hoping the alcohol will somehow set me straight. I slowly stand and approach Rhett who hasn’t moved since Thomas exited.
“Why?” he asks plainly.
I rub my eyes in an attempt to stop the tears from forming. “I had to do this. I didn’t have a choice.”
He laughs condescendingly. “Poor Aldo. You were forced, huh?”
“Rhett—”
“You could have listened to me when I told you people would get hurt. I know you think you have this spectacular power, Aldo, but they could crush you.” His voice is cold, chiding me and I sink back as he continues. “You plotted this all along. Do you know the hell I’ve been through? You beg me to make love to you so you can show me how much you love me, and the very same night you lock me out of your subconscious and take off without a word?”
“You wouldn’t have let me go. I need to do this.” I wipe my cheek where a warm tear has trickled down.
“All I wanted was to keep you safe. You have no idea how far this can go. But I can see you’ll go to any measures to do this.”
“Not any measure,” I say defensively.
“Oh really?” He grabs my arm with the bite. “You let one feed on you. Not just anyone, but Andre. You have ripped open old wounds, Aldo.”
“What does that mean?”
“He knows what you are now.” He ignores my question and runs his hand through his hair.
“I let him drink from me because I needed him to believe he could hypnotize me, but…” I pause.
“He can hypnotize you.”
“No, he can’t. A hybrid cannot be hypnotized as long as they are well fed.” I stare up at him with a knowing gaze. His eyes flicker and I can see regret flash. I continue to speak, not allowing him to explain. “I only wanted him to believe he could, but…”
“But what?”
“He really hypnotized me. I haven’t fed for a while.” I feel the burn in my belly, the hunger, but I look away from him, shame rushing through me as I remember the video. And almost as if he read my mind, his eyes fall back to the table.
“What’s on the tape?” He nods in its direction.
“It’s nothing.” I shake my head, trying to play it off.
“What’s on the tape?” he questions again, not accepting my answer. I can’t tell him what happened with Andre. It would send him over the edge.
“Rhett, I can explain everything.”
“No need to,” he says calmly as he passes by me, grabbing the tape off of the table.
“Rhett, no!” I beg, trying to grab the tape back from him. “Please!” I cry.
“Then tell me what’s on it.” He looks down at me, rage burning in his eyes. My face is soaked with tears and my nose is running. I try unsuccessfully to come up with something to tell him, but exhaustion consumes me before I can.
“He hypnotized me. I don’t remember anything after he fed on me. I didn’t know what happened until I watched the video,” I sob ashamed, through my tears. “Please don’t watch it,” I beg again, knowing how much it will upset him. I grab his arm, but he jerks away. “It wasn’t my fault, Rhett,” I plead.
“You really think this all just happened to you?” he roars as he steps closer to me. His size towers over me and I feel like a field mouse about to be pulverized by a lion. “You came here and used your body to get their attention. What did you think would happen?”
“That’s what I did in my subconscious and you didn’t care,” I counter meekly, still lost in the shadow of his body.
“Do you really want to go there?” he asks, but it sounds more like a threat.
“Lucy sent me.”
“Oh, Lucy sent you, did she?” he mocks me.
“The necklace told me where to go.” I pull my chain out and his eyes flare at the sight of it.
He takes the rectangle in his hand and turns it. His gaze softens as he sees his horseshoe, the one he gave me, or was going to give me the night I left. His thumb traces it before he lets it fall back to my chest, his eyes returning to their previously rich-with-rage look. “And now you’re ready to talk about it?”
“Are you ready to talk about your secrets?” I reply, holding my sobs back.
Turning his head slightly, he says, “My secrets protect you. They didn’t abandon you without a fucking clue about what happened.” His voice rises again.
“So you think you’re protecting me by keeping things from me?”
“I know I am.”
“So not telling me I’m a hybrid was your way of protecting me?”
Rhett’s eyes dart down to the floor.
“You knew all of that time and you hid it from me?”
“We’ve both had secrets.”
“Mine didn’t involve lying to you about what you are.”
“No, just plotting to desert me so you could run off and fuck your way into a nest of vampires.”
I cringe with his words. “I haven’t fucked anyone.” I’m thankful Daniel rejected me those few times I threw myself at him so I can say that right now. “I wanted to get in,” I redirect. “To get revenge.”
“And then what?” he questions me like I’m an idiot. I pause unable to speak. “Then what? What would you have done once you got inside of the nest?”
I stand silent, racking my brain for an intelligent answer, but nothing surfaces.
“Let me guess. You’d get in and turn into some badass ninja that would slay all of the big bad vampires.”
“I wouldn’t have been alone,” I snap, my pride surfacing.
“Oh. Your precious Thomas would have been there, right?” His jaw tenses. He’s angry I left him, but finding me with Thomas has really sent him over the edge. “And if that jackleg plan didn’t work, what then?” he persists.
I have no answer to give him.
“Exactly,” he runs his hand through his hair, agitated. “
You would have been raped. Just like your mother.”
Anger swells within me. Both he and Sarah have used my mother’s death as a means to deter me and I’m over it. “I want to do this to avenge my mother, your mother, Sarah—” I shout, but he interrupts me.
“Don’t you fucking dare talk to me about that shit! Like it’s an excuse for all of this! Like you’re entitled to do whatever to whoever and it’s all justified by this ludicrous idea of revenge for those who suffered before you. I fucking cherish you!” he whispers loudly through clenched teeth. “Your body is like a jewel to me. I wanted to wait, to show you how much it means, Aldo.”
“Or were all of those times you rejected me about something else?”
“Excuse me?” He looks at me like I’m insane.
“You didn’t make love to me because you knew you were lying to me. You were hiding from me something you knew could change the dynamic of our relationship. You were digging in my subconscious trying to hide the truth from me. That’s why you didn’t have sex with me.”
He shakes his head and my body starts to tremble. “At least I didn’t take advantage of you. I didn’t know what to do. If you never drank blood, you would have never transitioned. So if my greatest wrong against you was hiding something I thought would keep you safe, than yes. I’m an asshole. But make no mistake I wanted you badly, and even without sex I would’ve done anything for you. Anything! And you just come here and use sex to work your way into a nest full of vampires? Do you want to lose your virginity to a vampire?”
I roll my eyes. Obviously I don’t. “No, I don’t want to do anything with a vampire, but frankly my virginity wouldn’t be an issue if you had made love to me!”
“So you ran off because I wouldn’t fuck you?” His words burn my ears. I hate hearing him talk so harsh and vulgar to me. It’s not him. At least not the Rhett I knew.
“Yeah, that’s it Rhett. All I ever wanted was to be fucked.” I deliver the words with as much vulgarity as possible. I turn away from him, but he grabs my shoulder pulling me back.
“You are in way over your head. They will use you up and drain you dry.” His words are cold and hit me like a ton of bricks. He presses his lips together as if he’s stopping himself from saying something else even more terrible, if that’s possible.
“I didn’t have sex with anyone, Rhett.” I try to ease his mind.
“Oh, well kissing your ex-boyfriend, and doing whatever is on this tape is excusable as long as you didn’t have intercourse with anyone?” His words hit me as if someone has just judo chopped me in my throat.
“He kissed me!” I cry defensively. “And Andre hypnotized me and Daniel—”
“Daniel?” he questions. “Andre’s so called brother?” He says it oddly, as if the very name took the wind right out of him.
Suddenly, I remember my dream where I discovered Rhett had met with Daniel to ask him if there was a way to stop the transition or for tips on how to train me. Raising my chin, I say, “You remember Daniel, right? You met with him to discuss me.” His lips flatten with my words. “Yeah, I know all about that. You must’ve forgotten to delete that little bit of information while you were going through my subconscious behind my back!”
“At least I tried to find a way to help you. I was trying to figure out what to do,” he growls. Our bodies are inches apart and I’m feeling overwhelmed. I reach out and place my hand on the nearest table to balance myself before I continue.
“Unlike some, Daniel has helped me embrace what I am. He’s teaching me.” As I say the words I realize how true it is. Daniel has always tried to teach me, even if that meant letting me learn the hard way. While he hasn’t told me what he’s doing with Andre, he’s never told me no—or tried to keep me out of it.
Rhett’s eyes scream hurt. “It doesn’t fucking matter!” he shouts, his fists clenched at his sides.
“It matters to me!” I roar. “You and Sarah should have told me what I was. Instead I had to hear it from him.”
“Ma’am, should I call the police?” the young, dark haired server asks from behind the counter. I hadn’t noticed her at all. I’m surprised she hasn’t called the police already.
“Mind your own fucking business,” Rhett growls at her.
“Rhett!” I scold.
“Maybe we should discuss who you haven’t kissed, seduced, or gotten naked for. Perhaps that list would be shorter.” His words feel like a knife twisting into my heart. I have no real defense, but I have to try and make him see.
“That’s not fair. It’s not like I want to use my body to get to Andre—”
“So that makes everything you’ve done okay?”
I look at him and see what I’ve done to him. This man cherishes me and I’ve not only betrayed him by lying to him about my plans to take down the nest, but I’ve betrayed him by using my body to do it. We’ve both betrayed each other, and I’m really no better than him. His pain radiates off of him and crashes over me, completely deflating any fight left in me. We love each other, but this isn’t the way two people in love behave.
“I never meant to hurt you,” I whisper.
“We could have been good together, ya know.”
“I know.” I swallow the lump in my throat.
“You told me you loved me.” He places his hand on his chest over his heart, exactly the way he did the night I confessed my love for him.
“I meant it. That hasn’t changed.” I stare up at him, willing myself to remain standing as my body threatens to collapse under me. “I’m so sorry.” It’s all I can say now. I am sorry. Sorry for hurting him, sorry for leaving him, sorry for everything.
“I gotta go. I need time to think.” He turns to the server behind the counter and grabs her arm, pulling her toward him so she’s staring into his eyes. “You won’t remember any of this. You won’t remember seeing me or her.” He releases her arm and she shakes her head and blinks. Then she goes about wiping off the counter as if nothing happened.
“Rhett, I’m sick,” I whisper to him, desperate for him to stay. I don’t want him to leave like this. Angry and hurt.
“I’m sure Thomas or Daniel can take care of it for you.” He exits the café, taking the tape with him. I’m frozen as I watch the door slam behind him. I blink as tears continue to fall like rain drops down my face.
“Are you alright, ma’am?” the young waitress asks me, still behind the counter.
“I’m fine.” I realize I’m sweating and my heart feels like it’s about to beat out of my chest. “I have to go.” I nod at her as I grab my purse and throw a twenty on the table. I need air. Making my way out of the door, I know I’m in a no win situation here. There is nothing I can say to Rhett that will make it okay, but there is a chance his presence could ruin my plans. I’ve always known I would have to deal with the fallout from leaving Rhett the way I did, and I’ve dreaded it. I never wanted to hurt him, but he was a casualty, an innocent bystander to my plot. I begin running, or at least jogging as fast as I can in my current state. If Rhett, by chance, is following me, I’m not diluded enough to believe I can out run him, but I have to try. I check over my shoulder, but I don’t see him. Feeling very ill, I turn into an alley to vomit. When I’m done, I rest my head against the cool brick building and decide I’m dying. This is what death feels like. Suddenly, a car pulls up and the driver’s window rolls down.
“Bad night?” Daniel peers out from the window of the driver’s seat.
“I’ve had better,” I mumble.
“Get in, kitten.”
“Stop calling me that ridiculous name!” I hiss.
“Okay. Get in, Aldo.” He stares at me with one hand on the steering wheel, a cigarette held between two fingers.
“Thought you quit?”
“Because of a certain asinine person in my life—I’m not naming names,” he gives me a pointed look, indicating I am the asinine person of which he speaks, “my stress levels are up. Smoking helps.”
“She sounds like a
real pain in the ass.” I cough, gagging as I do.
“Not to mention she keeps giving me blue balls,” he jokes ignoring my obvious bad state. “Get in the car,” he orders.
“No.” I continue walking, willing myself not to collapse in the street. “How did you know where I was?”
“That douchebag ex-boyfriend of yours called me. I hear another ex is in town now as well. A blood healer? For a virgin you really get around.”
“Leave him out of this,” I mumble.
“Please get in the car.” He takes a drag of his cigarette as he edges the car forward to catch up with me.
“Why?”
He exhales a long stream of smoke. “I’ll explain everything. I’ll tell you what you want to know.” The car stops, and I turn to look at him. My body aches, and I know there is not a chance in hell I’ll make it to my hotel, or anywhere by myself.
“Where will you—” The world begins to spin and then there is darkness.
When I wake, I’m lying on a large leather sofa in what looks like a warehouse. It’s Daniel’s apartment in Charlotte. The room is huge and sunlight bathes the room through the large windows. I wince as I try to apply pressure to my broken hand and quickly fall back, too weak to sit up. Heavy breathing is coming from somewhere in the room, but I opt to lie still instead of searching for it, wondering if death will find me soon. I’m not afraid to die, I was taught not to fear death, but I’m afraid to leave this world without righting things with Rhett.
The sound of footsteps approach and I turn my head slightly. Daniel stands before me, shirtless, exposing his thin, but muscular upper body glistening in sweat.
He stares down at me and shakes his head. “Not looking so good, kitten.”
I lick my dry lips and try to swallow, but can’t because my throat is so dry. He quickly leans down beside me lifting me and holds a glass of water to my lips.
“Thank you,” I whisper after taking a sip and he lies me back down. “Why are you sweaty?”