Shane just nodded and then walked away, and Cal turned to his brothers.
“I pissed her off this morning, telling her how to live her life. She shouldn’t have been driving.”
“Stop it,” Braden said. “Don’t do that. Rose is gone, and it’s likely TJ is too. We need to get our shit together for Lane. He’s going to need us more than ever. We can’t let the guilt consume us. Remember how Dad was?”
Braden was right. “Damn, Bray, I thought we’d seen the last of that damned curse.”
“Me too,” Braden said. Cal noticed his brother was blinking and just drew him into his arms. They put their heads together as they clung to each other and tears flowed. They would have each other’s backs. He wasn’t about to let this turn any of them into the bitter man their father had been.
He cried for Rose’s life, cut short, and for his own weaknesses. He’d failed her. But he promised himself he wouldn’t fail her son.
“What are we going to do?” Braden asked.
“Raise Lane to be the best man he can be, and never let Rose’s spirit die,” Cal said.
Chapter Four
Amelia sat in the Carriage House playing with the toddler who wasn’t exactly sure what he’d seen. Oh, God. This cute little kid was going to have something to deal with when he was older. She heard from her dad that Lane’s father had been in the vehicle as well. She knew it would be better if he didn’t remember this day and hoped she was distracting him enough.
But she knew from her own experience that some moments in life never seemed to fade. She looked down at Lane and promised herself she’d do her part to make sure he had enough people who loved him in his life that he wouldn’t dwell on the loss.
She wasn’t at all able to process that sweet Rose Delaney had died. How was this little boy going to manage? Amelia wiped away a tear as she noticed Lane looking up at her.
The Carriage House was bustling with activity as first responders had set up base operation. If there was one thing she loved about Last Stand, it was the community. Yes, those same people would nip in everyone’s business and gossip all day long, but they also always had each other’s backs. She found a quiet area and sat down with Lane, making sure he was occupied with a pad of paper and a pen from her purse.
Her friend Lea came over to check on them and the look on her face mirrored what Amelia was feeling when she glanced over at Lane.
“Do they know what happened? Who was driving the truck?” Lea asked.
“I’m not entirely sure, but I think it was Rose Delaney,” Amelia said.
“Oh my God,” Lea said. She reached over and fixed Lane’s hat on his head, then gave Amelia a look that she interpreted to mean ‘that sucks.’
“I am keeping this one occupied until things settle down,” Amelia said.
“Good idea. I’m going to see if they need any more help,” Lea said, as she turned and walked back toward Main Street.
Her sisters were both working alongside their father who had been a community leader for as long as Amelia could remember. She felt that pang she always did when she confronted the truth about her parentage. Yet at the same time, she felt pride and admiration for her family.
Priscilla was with her group of cronies, including Clara Perkins the town’s unofficial matchmaker. Amelia overheard them talking about rides for those who weren’t hurt and then food for those who were. The Texas Heritage Women’s group—which the older women belonged to—had been in Last Stand since the beginning. They were always among the first to offer to help out in a crisis.
She could hear the sirens and the acrid scent of smoke filled the air. The Carriage House had been abandoned midparty so there were half-filled plates and glasses holding drinks that had become watered down from melted ice. Amelia knew that she needed to keep Lane distracted, far away from the accident. But she really didn’t know much about children. She’d hugged the little boy, but he’d squirmed to be put down. He looked scared and she had no idea how to comfort him.
She stooped down to his level. “What do you want to do?”
“Mama. Want Mama,” he said.
The little boy kept looking back toward the entrance and she couldn’t even guess how much he’d comprehended. She’d picked him up a cookie, but he wasn’t interested in food. In fact, she thought she should probably take him out of this place.
“She was in an accident,” Amelia said.
He put his thumb in his mouth and she sat down on the ground, lifting him onto her lap. She only knew one song that was even close to a lullaby and that was ‘Bye Bye Blackbird.’ Her mom used to sing it to her when she couldn’t go to sleep so she cuddled Lane on her lap and sang it to him.
He put his head on her shoulder, the little Stetson on his head hitting her in the chin. This little cowboy was doing his best to be strong, but she could see he was scared and maybe a little tired. She hugged him closer to her and kept singing.
Her mom walked over to them, putting her hand on Amelia’s shoulder, and started singing too. Lane’s eyes got a little heavier. Amelia looked up at her mom, realizing how much she wished she could have the last thirteen years back. There it was. The reason she hadn’t left modeling and come back home for good—she’d been unsure of how to move on, past the truth that was her life.
When they finished singing, her mom wobbled and Amelia lifted her hand to steady her, looking around for her father or sisters. But her mom just drew out a chair from the table and sat down on it.
“Are you okay?”
“As fine as I can be. Don’t worry about me,” Lilly said. “This little one needs our attention.”
“That was the only song I knew. I don’t know what else to do,” she said.
“He just needs us to keep him busy,” Mom said. “I’m sure whoever brought him to the party had a diaper bag with some toys and whatnot in it…but I don’t see it. Do you see Emma’s bag?”
“Over on the chair. Why?” Amelia asked, but she suspected her mom had an idea.
“Your sister always has either a tablet or e-reader with her. I’m hoping she’s still using that mini tablet your father and I gave her for Christmas.”
Lilly got up, steadied herself and then moved slowly through the party area to get Emma’s bag. Lane tipped his head back, his hat falling on the ground next to them. She watched her mom, ready to go after her if she needed help, but Lilly was moving more easily now.
“Who you?”
“I’m Amelia. I’m a good friend of your uncle Cal’s,” she said. Good friend? Yeah, right. But today she was. “I knew him when he was just a boy.”
“Unca Cal was little?”
“He was. Once, he was just like you,” Amelia said.
Was she talking too much? She had no idea what a boy of his age would understand.
“Mela, where Mama?” he asked her as he looked down at his hands. She hugged him closer to her.
What was she going to say? Her heart was breaking for this little boy who’d lost his mother. And though her mom was still alive, a part of her identified with Lane. This was how she’d felt when she’d learned the truth all those years ago. It had been as if she’d had something ripped from her.
“Oh, baby, I’m not sure,” Amelia said. This was definitely not the kind of news that she should deliver. She just hugged him close. “There was a bad accident. So, we’re going to have to wait to find out.”
“Found it!” her mom said, dropping down next to her and Lane on the grass. Her mom leaned in close. “What’s the matter?”
“He asked me where his mama was,” Amelia said.
Her mom reached over and brushed the white-blond hair off the little boy’s forehead. “She was in an accident. That’s why we are watching you so that she can get the help she needs.”
He stuck his thumb back in his mouth and settled more fully on Amelia’s lap. “I’ll leave you two to play. There’s a farm game on here that you’ll both enjoy.”
“Are you sure you’re okay to go off
by yourself?” she asked.
“I’m fine,” her mom said, her mouth tight. She easily unlocked the mini tablet. She and her sisters all used their birthdays as their codes; they all could access each other’s devices.
Her mom tapped on a farm game that Emma was obsessed with and handed the device to Amelia since Lane still sat on her lap. Amelia showed the little boy how to harvest a crop and then plant new ones. Then she turned on the sound because each animal and plant made a little noise.
“I’ll go see what I can find out,” her mom said. “You got this?”
“Yeah, I do,” she said, catching her mom’s wrist before she turned away. “Thanks, Mom.”
“For what?”
“Just being you,” she said.
Her mom kissed her on the forehead before walking away. The accident, seeing Cal and his brothers facing their new reality, drove home how fragile life was. She was holding on to anger and to the past because it seemed like she’d have forever to sort it out. And as petty as she knew it was, she wanted her mom to hurt as much as she had when she’d learned the truth.
*
The Corbyn mansion had always been on Ash and Main directly across from the bank. While other families had moved to ranches or to Austin or Houston, the Corbyns had stayed in their big house, updating and expanding it as the years went by. The sprawling Victorian mansion always looked warm and welcoming to her. She held Lane in her arms—the little boy had fallen asleep and Delilah, who’d had to go to the Dragonfly for the dinner service, had stopped by to tell her that all of the Delaneys had gone with Rose’s body. So it looked like she’d be watching this little one for a bit longer. She liked it because it gave her something to focus on and she could go spend time at her parents’ house without having to talk about the past.
And the Carriage House staff had started cleaning up so she’d figured it was time to go. She wasn’t sure how long they would be and honestly, nothing in her life had prepared her for this kind of thing. Her grandmother opened the front door as Amelia was standing on the sidewalk just looking at the house.
“Come on up here. Your mom has made a place for this little one to sleep.”
Amelia walked into the house—it smelled like it always did in spring. Gardenias. Her mother’s favorite scent. For the first few years she’d been in New York, she’d avoided anything that had that scent. Today had changed something deep inside of her. And that ball of anger and hurt that she’d held on to for so long felt like it was loosening.
She carried Lane into the family room where her parents and Emma were sitting and quietly talking. Memaw nodded toward her father’s recliner.
She saw that the chair had been fully reclined with a pillow, blanket and Mr. Stuffing. The stuffed bear had been in their family forever.
She tucked Lane under the blanket and carefully removed his boots. She recognized them as being made by Kelly Boots in neighboring Whiskey River.
“I don’t have Cal’s number. Has anyone heard from him?” Amelia asked.
“I’ve got it. I’ll text him,” Jasper said.
Her dad wasn’t always a quick adapter to technology and a text from Jasper was like receiving a letter. He always addressed the recipient and used proper punctuation. She and her sisters teased him about it, but it was just the way he was.
Amelia plopped down on the couch next to Emma, who was reading. She glanced down at the book in her sister’s lap and saw it was The Scarlet Pimpernel. Her sister loved that book series. Actually, she loved many books, which was why being a librarian was perfect for her.
Emma shifted until she was leaning against Amelia’s shoulder and she put her arm around her little sister as she had so many times in the past. No one was talking, Louis Armstrong was playing quietly in the background and she closed her eyes for a moment. This was something she hadn’t allowed herself to miss. Just sitting in the family room with her family.
“I need a drink,” her mom said, going over to the bar cart. “Girls? Priscilla? Care to join me? Jasper mixed up some martinis earlier.”
“Yes, please,” Amelia said, thinking they all needed one but at the same time, wondering if her mom should indulge. She glanced at Emma, who just shook her head.
“Definitely,” Priscilla answered. “I might need two after today. That was so sad. I could hardly stand to see the destruction and, of course, the tragic deaths.”
“Me either, Memaw,” Emma said, getting up and going over to help their mom hand out the drinks before coming and sitting back down next to Amelia.
They all sipped their martinis, which her father made extra dry, just the way she liked them. She had resisted coming to these kinds of get-togethers since she’d been home but today, she was here and taking comfort in being part of the family. It was one of the things that she’d denied herself. When she was in New York, she didn’t miss it but being back here just drove home the point that she might have been spiting herself trying to make her mom hurt.
“That little one looks so innocent, sleeping over there,” Memaw said. “But he’s sure seen a lot in his life.”
“Memaw, isn’t that being a touch melodramatic?”
“Not really, honey,” her mom said, sitting down on Emma’s other side on the large overstuffed leather couch. “Cal came home from the NFL when Rose got pregnant and there was a big blowup between them. He didn’t want her to…well, he wanted her to finish school and go to college. But you know that his middle brother, Finn, dropped out to race in NASCAR. He got his GED, but still Rose didn’t let Cal forget that there were a different set of rules for her.”
Seemed like Cal had had a rough few years. But when she’d chatted with him, none of that had shown. He’d been the same cocky and confident Cal she’d always known. One of the things she’d envied about him when they were kids was how he’d just ignore the not-so-nice parts of his family life and walk around like everything was okay. It was one of the things she’d always struggled with.
She wasn’t one of those people who could smile when she felt like crying or yelling. Her dad said she didn’t have a poker face and her memaw thought it was that she just “felt” things too strongly. Delilah, on the other hand, just said she had no capacity for lying.
Amelia knew that was it. That one lie that had shaped her had burned it out of her. And sure, she’d lost some modeling gigs because she wouldn’t put up with some guy touching her inappropriately, but she didn’t care. She wasn’t going to pretend something was okay when it wasn’t. She’d modeled for some high-profile clients, including a famous cosmetics brand because her features were exotic-looking, and she’d loved that for a while. But in the end, it had all been empty. She didn’t love it. It had just been something she’d used to escape, a way to hurt her mom the way Amelia had been hurt.
She’d realized that the lesson had made her grateful to her parents. She’d needed it when she’d left to go into a world where lies were the currency. Because she’d seen firsthand what it felt like to lose everything, she’d never felt the stakes were high enough for her to fudge the truth.
“Those boys will raise him. They are good at sticking together and taking care of each other,” Jasper said. “It’s going to be hard because Cal’s been trying to raise not only Rose, but also TJ and little Lane since he was born. But a child makes everyone stronger and gives life focus.”
*
His brothers were sitting in the pickup truck when he walked away from the medical facility. He could remember a number of times, when he’d barely been a legal driver, that he’d had to take the boys or Rose there. Rose. His heart pounded as he thought of her and it felt like he had rocks in his stomach. No matter how this felt like the past, it wasn’t.
He wasn’t out searching surrounding towns and bars for their father. He was walking back to his brothers after having seen their baby sister and her boyfriend in a morgue. They’d been inside with him for most of it, but Finn had cracked and walked out. He’d sent Braden after him.
; There was no need for his brothers to wait to sign paperwork when he could do it on his own.
He shoved his hands into his hair. It felt grimy from the smoke earlier and he was starting to feel the soot and grime on his body. As he approached the truck, he noticed his brothers were deep in conversation. He didn’t want to talk. He wanted to get drunk and then physically beat something, then drink some more and keep doing it until he was exhausted.
No matter what anyone said, he knew that the fault for this accident was his. He’d pushed Rose, insisting she get her degree, insisting that TJ step up. Just insisting on too damned much. If he’d insisted she stay home with Lane, she’d be alive. If he’d let her and TJ just live on the ranch or even bought them a house in town, they’d have been fine.
Hell, maybe insisting hadn’t been the way. But frankly, he didn’t know any other way to communicate. It had worked on the playing field and it worked in business because Braden was there to smooth things over. But it sure as hell hadn’t worked with his little sister.
Suddenly playing house didn’t seem like a bad fate for her. At least, she’d be alive.
But he’d wanted better for her. And this was what his desire for her future had wrought.
“Cal, you okay?” Finn asked, opening the door to the cab of the truck.
“Yeah, just trying to get my head straight.”
“Good luck with that. We can’t. Listen, we need to go and get Lane,” Finn said. “But I’m not in any mood to handle him tonight.”
“Me either,” Braden said. “What are we going to tell him—” Braden’s voice broke.
“I’ll handle it. Why don’t you two go to the ranch and I’ll meet you later?”
“No,” Finn said.
“What do you mean, no?” Cal asked.
He could see Finn was spoiling for a fight. It was his middle brother’s way of dealing with his emotions. Finn had always shoved them down deep and pretended they didn’t exist.
Today, Cal was almost in the mood to give it to him. Then maybe he could feel something other than the pain of loss.
Her Texas Ex (The Dangerous Delaneys Book 1) Page 4