He sucked on the pulse beating in the side of her neck as he thrust all the way home. He knew he was leaving a mark with his mouth and that pleased him. He wanted her to remember this night later. To remember him when she woke the next morning. Part of his past was coming back to haunt him.
Her eyes widened with each inch he gave her. She clutched at his hips as he started thrusting, holding him to her, eyes half-closed, and her head tipped back.
He leaned down and caught one of her nipples in his teeth, scraping very gently. She tightened around him, demanding more. He wanted to keep the pace slow, steady, but the pleasure between them was too much.
He felt her body tighten as he clutched her hips. Then she scraped her nails down his chest. His sac tightened, and his blood roared in his ears as he felt everything in his world center to this one woman.
He called her name as he came. She tightened around him and he looked up into her eyes as he kept thrusting. He saw her eyes widen and felt the minute contractions of her body around his as she was consumed by her own orgasm.
She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and kissed the underside of his chin.
He told himself they’d both gotten what they needed and as he wrapped his shirt around her and held her in the swing, he knew that was a lie. He hadn’t gotten the distraction he’d been looking for. She’d taken away the sharpness of the pain of his sister’s death, but she’d awakened a need in him for something he wasn’t sure Amelia would deliver. Regardless of the curse, he wanted more than one night with her. Only he knew she wasn’t someone who would stay. She always walked away.
Chapter Eight
Her body started to cool down and her legs were getting stiff from straddling him, so she began to get up. She looked into his eyes, searching for something she couldn’t define, but she didn’t find it.
Did he regret this?
Amelia had hoped for closure after she and Cal had hooked up.
This was awkward.
Gingerly she lifted herself off his lap and then reached for her shirt, which luckily was big and fell to her hips.
He watched her and then stood up, turning his back, she assumed to do up his jeans, and she grabbed hers and shimmied into them.
“Um…I guess I should be going,” she said.
He turned and looked over his shoulder at her. Again, his expression was inscrutable and she wanted to know what he was thinking. Or maybe it was a good thing she didn’t know. He probably regretted this.
“Okay. I’ll walk you to your car,” he said.
She nodded. “I left my keys on the table in the hall.”
He didn’t say a word, just went to the front door and opened it. He was back in a second with her keys, which he handed to her and then he walked by her side to the car. She wanted to run, get in the car, and then gun the engine as she drove away, leaving this moment in the dust.
How was it that something that had seemed so perfect just minutes earlier was now this?
That was the Amelia touch.
Her last boyfriend had mentioned that she seemed to find a way to sabotage every meaningful connection she ever had. All her romantic relationships and personal ones. And she had to admit, she was beginning to believe he was right. That had been another reason she’d come back to Last Stand. It was time to change things.
“Thanks for a nice evening,” he said, holding open her door.
“You’re welcome,” she said, getting into the car. He shut the door and turned back toward the house. She started the car and drove away slowly, as if she hadn’t realized just how screwed up she was at this moment.
She wanted to stay with Cal. She wanted to spend the night with him and hold him while he dealt with his grief for his sister. But instead, she’d done that thing she did.
She wanted to blame her mom. To say that if she hadn’t found out the truth of her parentage when she’d been a teenager, she might be better at relationships. Her sisters agreed that she had a deal with always thinking that people were hiding something from her. Not in a paranoid or malicious way… Emma always added that, as if she wanted to make sure that Amelia didn’t feel bad about her own failings.
As soon as she got to the main highway, she turned toward town but she wasn’t concentrating on driving and pulled off to the side of the road.
What was she supposed to do?
She knew that sleeping with Cal while he was grieving was stupid. She was just as confused as she’d always been, now that she was back in Last Stand. And she hated the fact that despite thirty looming like a Dementor, she still felt like she was eighteen. When was she going to get mature and start making great decisions rather than ones that had long-term repercussions?
She liked Cal.
Dammit, she really liked him.
It wasn’t that crazy-ass crush thing that she’d had back in high school. No, this was legit. But instead of being smart or sensible, she’d acted like her regular self. She put her head on the steering wheel of her car, banging it lightly.
She drove to her house. When she’d started making serious money from modeling, she’d purchased a few properties around the country, including this large ranch-style house. She was planning to remodel it now that she was home. Who knew how long she’d need to be here? She pulled into the driveway and noticed someone sitting on her front porch on one of the Cracker Barrel rockers that she’d purchased last year with her sisters on a road trip through Tennessee.
Her mom.
Amelia was definitely not in the mood to talk to her. She had been careful to never say anything that would upset her mom and maybe that was the reason that she hadn’t been able to find closure.
The things she knew she wanted to say in her heart were mean and hurtful and she knew they would cut her mom, and that her dad—not her biological father—would never forgive her if she hurt her mom that way.
But she couldn’t sit in the car without making her mom think something was wrong so she got out and walked toward the front porch.
“Hi, honey, I hope you don’t mind but I couldn’t sleep. My doctor suggested that walking might help. Anyway, I ended up here and thought I’d wait for you,” she said.
This.
This was why she was here. Her mom was sick and not one doctor had been able to give them any prognosis that wasn’t worrying. She had walked here but to be fair, Amelia’s house was only a few blocks from her parents’. And the streets in Last Stand had nice sidewalks.
“Hi, Mom. Want to come inside?”
“Sure,” she said.
She led the way into the kitchen nook and her mom took a seat on the padded bench under the window. Amelia got her a glass of lemonade, more to keep herself busy and to avoid having to sit down and talk.
“You okay?” Mom asked as Amelia handed her the drink and then sat down across from her.
“Yeah,” she said. The lie felt thick and heavy on her tongue.
“You sure?”
She nodded. She couldn’t make up any excuse her mom would believe. “I just needed some time. Being back home isn’t what I expected.”
“It never is,” she said.
“When did you leave Last Stand?” she asked. Her mom had gone to college in Austin and lived at home. As far as Amelia knew, she’d never left. But then there were things about her mom she’d never known.
“When I found out I was pregnant with you.”
“What?”
Her mom sighed and leaned down against the open window. “I was confused, and I didn’t know what my mom would say. I loved Jasper, but he and I were just at the new part of the relationship, just falling in love and I didn’t want…”
“Me?” she asked.
“No. Honey, never that,” she said, scooting closer to Amelia on the bench and putting her arm around her. “I wanted you from the moment I learned I was pregnant.”
She hugged Amelia close and Amelia hugged her back, resting her head on her mom’s shoulder.
“But I made your life
…complicated.”
“You made my life,” she said. “I was drifting before you. I got in my car at Doc McBride’s after he told me and I just drove north. I didn’t stop except for gas until I reached Oklahoma. I thought about just keeping going. But I was out of cash and back then, there weren’t ATMs all over the place.”
“So, you needed money,” she said.
“Yes. I went into a bank to get them to cash a check and when they called the People’s Bank of Last Stand…Jasper came on the line and asked to speak to me,” her mom said.
“I bet that went well,” she said.
“You know how Dad is. He was so calm. He said he’d already authorized the money, but he was worried about me and so were my parents. He said whatever I needed to do, he hoped I’d find some answers and that he was just going to wait for me to come back home. He said he loved me and that he wasn’t going anywhere. That if it took me ten years of searching to realize I loved him too, fine. If it took forever—well, he hoped it didn’t, but he was still going to love me. He said that’s the way love works.”
She blinked back the tears. Jasper wasn’t a man of many words but he was wise. Hearing how much he loved her mom didn’t surprise her at all, but it did touch her. She wanted a man to love her like that, but knew she had yet to figure out how to be a woman who would inspire that kind of devotion.
“Is that why you didn’t go to Jax?”
“Oh, no,” she said. “Um, are you sure you want to know about Jax?”
“Yes,” she said. “Remember you promised me no more lies?”
“I do,” she said. “But we’re both going to need something stronger than lemonade for this story.”
Amelia went to the fridge and pulled out a new bottle of white wine. She poured them both a glass and then because she couldn’t drink without eating something or she got sick, she put a bowl of nuts and pretzels on the table as well.
Her mom took a healthy sip of the wine before Amelia even sat down.
“I tracked him down in LA after I’d talked to my parents. I didn’t say anything to Jasper about being pregnant or anything like that. I just called Mom and Dad and then went to LA. I needed to know what Jax thought about you before I made any other decisions.”
There was something tense and sad about her mom and a part of Amelia wished she hadn’t asked for the truth. But she knew she needed to hear it. She needed to understand how her parents had thought that never telling her about Jax Williams was the right decision. They weren’t horrible people, so she knew they’d done it to protect her.
“Anyway, I had to wait until the next morning for him to sober up. And I told him about you. He said he didn’t want kids, that I was to see his attorney if I was after money, which I wasn’t. And I told him that. After you were born he insisted I have a paternity test, which I did, then he asked me if I was going to keep you. I said yes, and he insisted that he wanted no part of your life. So we went to his attorney and signed some legal documents, which made you mine only. I called Jasper after that, telling him everything. He said that you weren’t mine only, you were ours. He loved us both, and he wanted me to come home so we could start our family.
“And I did. We never thought about Jax again until he showed up at Memaw’s house asking after me. Your dad and I were shocked that he wanted something from you. He’d signed away his rights.”
Her heart was heavy and her mind racing with questions, thoughts and emotions that she wasn’t ready to deal with. “But you couldn’t turn him away, because of the baby.”
“Exactly. We were stuck. There was no way an innocent child should pay the price for Jax’s behavior back then. So we had you tested. Your dad said if you were a match, it was a sign that God wanted you to know.”
Of course, he would. “Dad always believes that it’s God’s way, doesn’t he?”
“He does. So, I took you to Houston and you know the rest. I wanted to tell you more, but you weren’t interested in hearing anything else from us. I wanted to force you to listen—you know how I am. I hate letting anything go,” she said, taking another sip of wine.
“Dad probably said I needed time.” Amelia knew her father. He had likely thought that she’d reason out much of the story for herself. And if she’d been older, maybe she would have. But she had been sixteen and stubborn. “I was so hurt to think I wasn’t really a Corbyn.”
“You are a lot like me,” her mom said. “But you are also a lot like your dad. Never doubt that you are every inch a Corbyn, honey. I know that you came home because of whatever is going on with me, but I hope you find some peace in Last Stand, the way I did when I got back.”
She hugged her mom. It wasn’t going to be easy. She still had questions and lingering hurts but she wanted peace and the happiness her mom had found. She didn’t know if it would come with Cal or not, but she knew he was something she needed to put right as well.
*
Braden was waiting in the den when he walked back into the house. His brother had two bottles of Lone Star in his hand as well as the baby monitor. This might be their new reality, he thought.
“I heard her leave and thought you might want some company. Damned sure I’m tired of pretending to work,” Braden said.
“Pretending?” he asked, taking a bottle from his brother as he sat down in one of the big leather chairs that were situated in front of the floor-to-ceiling bookcases.
Braden sat down in the chair closest to him and took a long drag on his beer, tipping his head back.
“Yeah. For once work isn’t the escape I need it to be. You know that Rose and her friends were going to man the Outlaw Tequila booth at the Bluebonnet Festival on Saturday and she left me all these notes with their names and numbers on them. Along with one that said, ‘she’s hot, you’ll like her.’”
Braden’s voice broke.
Cal reached over to squeeze his brother’s shoulder as Braden looked away and took another swallow of the beer.
“Want me to take over organizing it?”
“Hell, no. It’ll hurt you, too,” Braden said.
“I’m the big brother,” Cal added. He wasn’t sure that really mattered but he was used to shouldering the burdens. Braden shouldn’t have to deal with this. And besides, focusing on something might make it easier for him to stop thinking about Amelia.
He knew he shouldn’t have hooked up with her tonight. Everything in his gut said the timing was wrong. He wasn’t ready. She wasn’t, either. But he hadn’t been able to resist her and honestly, for a few brief moments, he’d forgotten about everything. That had been worth it.
“Do you ever think that Dad drank to ease the pain of missing Mom?” Braden said. “I always thought he was weak but tonight…I’m thinking drinking until I can’t feel anything sounds like a damned good idea.”
“Bray, that’s not you. You’ll just feel guilty in the morning and make yourself go to work with a hangover.”
“Yeah, but at least I wouldn’t be missing Rose tonight.”
“I don’t think it works that way,” Cal said. “But if you want to try it, I’m happy to keep you company.”
“I was hoping you and Amelia would…well it might be nice for you to have something to distract you tonight.”
“Well, um, Amelia and I are like oil and water.”
“I don’t see that,” Braden said. “You don’t really fight.”
“That’s not what I meant. We just don’t mix.”
“Seemed like you two mix pretty well, but neither of you knows what to do with it,” Braden said.
“Dude, did you see us on the porch?” he asked, a little freaked out.
“No! Was there something I shouldn’t have seen? I just meant at dinner, she kept looking at you whenever she didn’t think you were looking, and you did the same. I’m not a weirdo, Cal. When you guys went outside, I let you alone,” he said.
“That was more me freaking out than any belief you would have watched us,” Cal said.
“Want to t
alk about it?”
“No. Do I look like Dr. Phil?”
Braden just laughed and took another swallow of his beer. “I’m empty. Want another?”
“Yeah,” he said. His brother had seemed more like his old self when he’d been laughing and despite everything, Cal felt a bit lighter.
He got up and grabbed them two more beers. Braden was still sitting where Cal had left him, staring sort of pensively at the floor. As much as he didn’t want to talk about Amelia, maybe it was the thing to get Braden’s mind off Rose.
“Thanks,” Braden said as he handed him the bottle.
Before he could come up with anything to talk about, he got a text and glanced down at his phone as Braden’s pinged.
It was from Finn.
The text was about the funeral. Finn was coming home, taking the week off from driving and he wanted them each to ask a friend to be a pallbearer.
“Well, hell. I guess we need to get focused on this,” Cal said.
“Yeah. I’ll ask Red,” Braden said. “He offered to do anything we need, and he liked Rose.”
“Yeah, he did. He always wanted siblings,” Cal said. Red was like a brother to Braden and he’d hung out at the Delaney house a lot when they’d been growing up. They were still close.
He wasn’t sure who he’d ask. Then realized that he could call his friend Wyatt Kelly. He and Wyatt had been friends for years. He wouldn’t mind. After all, he’d already called and offered to help out in any way. And he was going to be in town on Saturday for the Bluebonnet Festival, to represent Kelly Boots. They had a new boot they’d designed for spring that had a bluebonnet on it.
“This week is going to be hard,” Braden said. “The worst part is that life is still going to go on without her. I don’t want to plan for her to permanently be gone.”
“Me either, Bray. But there isn’t anything else we can do.”
“I wish that made it easier,” Braden said.
“I think the fact that it doesn’t is right. She was the heart of our family. And it’s going to take a long time before we can heal from this.”
Her Texas Ex (The Dangerous Delaneys Book 1) Page 8