Cold fury built in Landon’s chest. “You mean you were better equipped to go to Breckinhill’s bed because you had already been in mine?” She flinched, but did not deny his assertion. “How did the Duke handle that information? How did he react when he realized his new bride had no maidenhead?”
She shut her eyes and her rasping breathing was loud. “It was easy enough to fool him. It wasn’t as if he was a considerate lover. He looked at the sheets and found blood. He never questioned its source.”
Landon shook his head. “Well, at least I wasn’t the only man you lied to. It was common to all men you encountered. Tell me, did you find other men to love you, then shut them out completely as you did with me, as well?”
At that, she froze. The color that had entered her face bled away, leaving her pale and cool like an icy queen. Her shoulders stopped shaking and her demeanor subtly changed from one of regret to one of anger. Hot anger that rivaled his own. Despite everything, Landon couldn’t help being intrigued by that rage. He’d never seen her so. Her anger was as passionate as her desire.
She stepped closer. “Love. You say you loved me.”
“Of course I loved you.”
“Yet you did not argue about our annulment. With a few words, you could have thwarted my father’s plans and kept me as your wife, yet you didn’t. You retreated into your propriety and your political ambition and never spared me a second thought.”
He barked out harsh laughter. “If only you knew how wrong that statement is.”
She ignored him. “You must have heard the rumors about Breckinhill, you must have known the hell I was living as his wife. Yet you did nothing. You said nothing. You never offered me your so-called protection then. Did it please you to know Breckinhill gave me the back of his hand regularly? That he tormented me body and soul.”
Landon turned his face away. Her words shamed him. Pierced his angry haze with the reality of what she had faced. Alone.
Her voice dropped. “And even when I came to you and begged for your help, my torment wasn’t enough for you. You needed to punish me further. You wanted to break me as my father and my husband tried to break me.” She sucked in a breath as she dropped the sheet. He couldn’t help from raking a gaze over her form from head to toe. “Congratulations, my lord. You have succeeded where all others failed.”
Landon winced as she stooped and stepped into her gown. She reached around behind her and fastened half the buttons with lightening speed. She did not try with the others, but merely jammed her bare feet into her slippers. Turning on her heel, she made for the door.
There, she paused, though she did not look at him.
“I made a bargain with you, Landon. From dusk until dawn, whatever you wish. And until my sister is back safe with me, I will live up to my end of that bargain. I will return tonight unless you send word that you wish me to stay away. Good day.”
Then she was gone and she didn’t even do what he would have and slam the door behind her. Somehow the quiet dignity of her leaving made things even worse.
Landon sank down on his knees beside the bed and covered his eyes. “Damn it,” he howled as he bore the heels of his hands into his eyes.
Every word Juliana said had pierced into his very soul. Tormented and tortured him even more than her leaving. The truth cut more than the lies he’d believed for so long.
And that realization slid everything else into place. Juliana hadn’t told him the truth because she knew it would hurt him even more. She had lived with the heartbreak. Alone. She had dealt with the torture. Alone. She had given everything she was to protect her sister, without anyone to depend on… and in the end her sister had still been sold like chattel. And Juliana was still alone.
He had not fulfilled the promise he accused her of breaking. If he still considered her his wife, which he always had since he knew the things she said to break their marriage were lies, than he had been responsible for standing beside her during the worst of times.
Instead, he had turned her fears for her sister against her and used them for his revenge. And even though he had realized his love for her still burned as strong as ever through that revenge, he had also made her weep.
And that was something he had once promised he would never do.
He should have fought harder. He should have battled for her heart rather than let her go. But instead, he’d turned away. He’d gone to the House of Lords and fought every day against injustice, but the one person in his life he should have protected above all other, he had abandoned to pain and ruin.
Was it too late to repair that damage?
Perhaps. But Juliana was correct when she said he was a man of power and position now. He could at least use those things to insure her future.
Even if it was a future where he had no place.
Chapter Eight
Juliana smoothed her gown one last time as she stood outside her father’s office door. She knew she looked every inch the lady, despite sneaking into the house after her latest night with Landon.
A night that had changed her life forever.
She still loved Landon. It wasn’t a surprise to her to know that. She’d always loved him. What was a surprise was that when she looked in his eyes, behind the anger, she saw that he loved her, too. It had given her heart such joy to see that.
But she no longer believed that their love would have a second chance. There was too much between them. Too many lies. Too much heartbreak. Too many years of suffering. She might have a few more days with him, at most, but then they would go their separate ways. She back to her home where she could only pray she could repair the damage that had been done to her sister.
And Landon would return to the life he’d built for himself since their marriage. He would continue his important work in the House of Lords. Perhaps he would even be Prime Minister some day. But he would never be hers. Not really hers.
Tears burned behind her eyes, but she forced them away. No. She would not cry over what had been lost so long ago. Not anymore. She would march into her father’s office… and demand her sister back.
Tapping on the door, she held her breath.
“What is it?”
Her father didn’t sound too drunk… yet. With a sigh, she pushed the door open and went to face him.
He sat behind his desk, leaning over some ledgers… ones she doubted were balanced. The bottle of whiskey beside him had only just been opened. At least that was on her side.
“Well, there you are,” he said, sparing her a quick glance. “I thought you weren’t coming back.”
“Did you worry?” she asked as she seated herself across from him.
He laughed, though there was no humor to his voice. “You have always been able to take care of yourself, girl.”
She folded her arms. “I have always been forced to do so.”
He hesitated in his writing, but did not look up. “Yes, I suppose you have.”
That admission hung in the air, though Juliana wasn’t stupid enough to assume it would be followed by an apology. Such a statement would imply that her father cared. And she knew he didn’t. He hadn’t cared about anything or anyone since her mother’s death.
If he hadn’t taken his grief and turned it into a way to destroy their remaining family, she might have felt sorry for him.
“I know you gave Evelyn to Rafael Sinclair,” she said softly. “To settle your gambling debts.”
Her father’s hand hung suspended over his ledger and his eyes came up. “Where did you hear that?”
She shrugged. She certainly wasn’t going to reveal her association with Landon to her father, of all people. “I have my sources. But I need to know where they are so I can bring my sister home. Please tell me.”
She held her breath as her father set his quill down. There was a certain guilt in his eyes that made her pray he would do the right thing, finally, and help her. Help save Evelyn as he had never saved Juliana.
Without answering, he reached out and
grabbed the open bottle. She watched in horror as he took a long swig and slammed it back down hard enough that the items and piles of paper on the desktop rattled.
“It’s none of your affair. Sinclair and I made a gentleman’s agreement. ‘Sides, it’s too late now for her. You might as well let him finish with her and he’ll bring her back, I reckon.”
Juliana bent her head. How callously he could use them for his own purposes and then drink to dull what he had done. How easily he could dismiss her sister’s virtue like it was gold in his purse.
And she supposed it was.
“You make me sick,” she whispered as she got to her feet. “I will find Evelyn with or without your help. And once I do, I will find some way to remove us both from this house and from your ‘care’. I swear that on my life.”
Her father settled back in his chair with an ugly laugh. “That’s quite a vow to make. Especially since your husband left you no allowance and I hold your pin money. What will you do if you manage to get your sister and get out of this house? Sell yourself on the street?”
She hesitated with her hand on the door. Slowly, she turned back and met his eyes. Suddenly, she wasn’t afraid anymore. He had already taken everything she held dear. There was nothing left to lose.
“It would be no worse than what you’ve asked me to do all these years. In fact, it might be better than waiting for you to use us ill again. At least I would have some control over who I took to my bed.”
He drew back, clearly surprised that she would have an answer for his cruel, vile question. And as she stepped into the hall and closed the door, she also saw his fear. Because without the ability to barter his daughters… her father had no power over her anymore.
Now if only she could truly gain a little power back herself.
*
“All right,” Hawk said as he looked first out the carriage window and then at his brother. “You have me here and we’re going to this mysterious destination. Would you like to tell me why you burst into my home at such an ungodly hour and demanded my assistance?”
Landon rolled his eyes. “First, the ‘ungodly hour’ was noon.”
Hawk laughed. “And her ladyship and I were still abed.”
“I’m sure you were,” Landon said with a sigh. He was beginning to understand his brother’s decadent lifestyle more every day. How he longed to waste the day away making love to Juliana.
Hawk wrinkled his brow. “Is that a sense of humor my stern brother is developing? I can hardly believe it.”
“Well, don’t count on it lasting for long. Our mission today is not a pleasant one.”
Hawk grew serious. “You really do need my help.”
“I do.”
“You have it. I have long wished to repay you for your assistance when Bianca was taken from me. Anything I can do, I will do with pleasure.”
Landon shut his eyes. He had kept his secrets for a long time. And now he had to tell them. He took a deep breath and slowly told his brother everything. He confessed to his secret marriage, to the illegal annulment, to Juliana’s remarriage and her appearance in his home a few days prior. He told Hawk everything and when he was done, looking his brother in the shocked face, he felt an enormous sense of relief.
Finally, he had a confidante.
“Good God,” Hawk muttered, more to himself than Landon.
Landon nodded. “I know.”
“I wish I had,” Hawk said with a laugh. “I told Bianca I thought you were in love by the way you were acting so strangely. And it was clear you had some connection to Juliana Breckinhill after you practically claimed her right in front of the entire Cresterton party… but I never thought for a moment that you were married to the woman. Or that you had involved yourself in such a devious plot for revenge and pleasure.” His brother’s expression lightened. “It sounds like something I would do, not you.”
Landon found himself laughing. “Yes, I suppose it does.”
“Well, welcome to the world of the debauched rake, brother,” Hawk said. “You’ll find when we marry, we are fiendishly protective and completely faithful. And I assume that is why you have hauled me out of my home and are taking me to some mysterious destination. You have recognized you’re a bleeding idiot and desire to reclaim your wife from her bastard of a father.”
Landon drew back. Was he so transparent?
“How do you know?”
“Lovesick look in your eyes,” Hawk said, motioning to Landon’s face with one hand. “See the same look in my own eyes every single damn morning. It’s the one that would make you walk across fire to get to the woman you love.”
“I only plan to confront her father,” Landon sighed. “And I don’t know that I’ll be with Juliana in the end. There is so much standing between us.”
Hawk folded his arms. “My God, you can be an idiot sometimes.”
Landon bristled. “I beg your pardon?”
“Oh, don’t go all ‘lord of the manor’ on me now. I know your secrets.” Hawk furrowed his brow. “You think there’s too much history for you and this woman to have a life together?”
Landon shrugged. “Perhaps.”
“Bah! You’re just afraid.” Hawk shook his head. “I have only heard a fraction of this tangled story, but already I can see you both want to be together. I mean, this woman never told you that her father coerced her into leaving you… because she thought the truth would hurt you. And when she faced trouble with her sister, she ignored her fears, ignored what she thought was your hate and turned to you for help. And you…”
Landon leaned forward. If Hawk wanted to give him hope, he was more than willing to take it. “Me?”
“For God’s sake, you find her in your parlor after so long apart and the first thing you want to do isn’t deride her for her actions, but touch her.”
Landon nodded. That had been his first desire, though he had denied himself that pleasure for two days. Denied himself her kiss for even longer.
“But the fact that gives me the most hope for your future is the bargain you struck with her.”
Landon flinched. “It was a cruel bargain.”
“No, but it certainly wasn’t an arrangement that the proper and passionless brother I know would have made.” Hawk cocked his head. “Landon, you made a bargain that would give you access to this woman even at great cost to you both. That is how much you wanted her. That is how much you needed her. And if, after five years, your desire for her still burns so brightly, then the love you feel for her can overcome even your own barriers. But only if you risk yourself for it. Only if you’re willing to surrender.”
Landon looked at his brother. He was older than Hawk, but somehow he felt like his brother was far more versed in this than he was.
“Surrender…” He shifted in his seat as the carriage began to slow. “Is that what you did?”
Hawk smiled. “Every single day. But Bianca surrenders, too. We each surrender to the fact that we must have faith in the other to guard our heart. That the other has the ability to destroy us, but that we know they won’t. It is terrifying to allow another person to have that kind of power. And it is the best thing I ever did in my life.” As they came to a stop in front of the townhouse of Juliana’s father, Hawk reached out and slapped his shoulder. “So tell me, why do you need me? What can I do?”
Landon looked out the window at the once great house that was now beginning to look shabby with ill repair. “Juliana’s father is a desperate man. And you know that desperate men can be dangerous. I may need your help if he won’t relinquish Juliana and her sister without force.”
“Ah, so I am to be the muscle.” Hawk grinned. “Very good. I haven’t had a chance to fight in a long time.”
Landon stepped down. “Neither have I, Hawk. Neither have I.”
*
“The bastard is keeping us waiting for a purpose,” Landon growled as he paced around the parlor.
Hawk looked at his brother from his position on a worn chaise with
a humor-filled quirk of his eyebrow. “No doubt he realizes you’re here to pound him into oblivion,” Hawk said. “And if I had known you were capable of such fury, I might have hidden from you, myself a few times.”
Landon shot his brother a look. He was in no mood for Hawk’s wit at present.
“For God’s sake, Landon, sit down,” Hawk finally barked.
Landon folded his arms before he did what he was told. The door behind them opened almost at the exact moment he did so and Juliana’s father stumbled inside.
It was said that once Lord Trevington was a man of manners and sense, but Landon couldn’t believe that to be true. He had only known Trevington as a vile drunk, a man who cared less for his daughters’ safety than he did for his own purse. A gambler and a fool.
Trevington’s current appearance did nothing to change Landon’s view. He wore no jacket and his waistcoat was ill-fitted over a round gut. His face was red, unshaven and sweaty.
He was drunk.
Landon got to his feet in disgust and moved toward the man.
“Where is Juliana?” he barked without preamble.
Trevington looked him up and down with foggy eyes. “And a good day to you, too, sir,” he slurred as he made his weaving way through the parlor. He spared a quick glance for Hawk, but made no acknowledgement. His brother watched everything carefully, but made no move to interfere.
Trevington splashed scotch into a glass, and a good portion onto the table where the bottle sat, before he turned back to his guests. “I never thought I’d see you again, Hawkins,” he said with a wobbly smile. “Are you the one Juliana has been spending her nights with like a whore? She never could get you out from under her skin.”
Landon took a step toward the man, but Hawk was on his feet in an instant and had him by the elbows. Landon tugged, but his brother wouldn’t release him.
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