by G. L. Argain
“Wait, what?”
“I’m going to bring in Lee. As a robot, she will make fewer mistakes.”
“The fuck? Lee’s a robot? And a female?”
“Lee’s actually designed to look like a female, although technically she has no gender at all as a robot, but, yes.”
Andrew believed Lee was a male, considering the low voice she had. However, the human had no experience with alien anatomy, and it’s a big universe, after all. It’s full of many strange things, impossible to discover every single one in a lifetime.
“Besides,” Juvir continued, “you shouldn’t unnecessarily worry about things you don’t know. That applies to everything in life, not just to tests such as these.”
“That makes sense, but it doesn’t make me much less afraid.”
“I’m not done yet. The point is that fear of the unknown causes so many problems in this universe. Whether it be meeting new alien species, experiencing new events, or anything that somebody has no idea as to how it will go, fear dominates over curiosity. The only way for that fear to go away is for knowledge to replace it, and even then there are some people who like to cling to their fears, surprisingly enough. You want to know why you shouldn’t be afraid? Because Lee knows exactly what to do without error, the procedure has always been completely painless for everybody else, and after decades of working on genetic procedures such as this, I have the experience and knowledge to prove my words. And if you can’t accept my words, then just be quiet, stay still, and find out for yourself.”
Andrew had chills down his spine—not from fear, but from fascination. He had never met anybody in person who had spoken so intelligently, so powerfully that Andrew couldn’t help but believe him. In a way, there were some exceptions that still needed to be discussed and taken care of, but Andrew felt better, and that’s the most important part.
“Unfortunately, not everyone thinks this way. I would suppose a few of you humans are open-minded, but even more would be what I described earlier: scared of unfamiliar beings, dealing with them by sweeping them aside as outcasts or monsters. Am I correct?”
“Yeah. It’s always been like that. Especially white men saying they’re the best while degrading minorities and women before knowing what they can really do.”
“Exactly. Just one of the reasons—other than the treaty—that I don’t want you exposed to the public. These people would treat you like an uncivilized outcast.”
“Well, thank you for treating me so well.”
Juvir created a corny smile—one that was wide, yet his mouth was only slightly open—and said, “No problem.”
“Ready to begin, sir,” said a voice as it entered the room.
“Ah, Lee, you’re here. Okay, Andrew, just lay on the table and Lee will get started right away.”
“Hold on a sec, Juvir,” said Andrew, who raised his hand up in an attempt to somehow more likely get Juvir’s attention, “what exactly do you do? I mean, to the sound of it, you’re a vice-president, a doctor, a philosopher, and—let me guess—my boss once I’m a soldier. Which one of these do you actually do for a living?”
“Is it so wrong to have more than one job? Besides, they’re more like hobbies than jobs, especially philosophy.”
When Andrew was back on Earth, he wanted to have a minor in anything such as psychology, sociology, or philosophy, all the while getting a major in engineering. That minor would act as his hobby while engineering would be the one to bring home the bacon.
And so, Juvir left the room as Andrew laid down onto the table. Lee asked him to take off the suit before proceeding.
Lee studied Andrew like how the Selentors did, except that Lee was more precise and cautious about it. When he was told to stay still, she took out a tiny ball-shaped device that was wirelessly connected to a computer within the room. The device looked like a blue volleyball the size of a typical bouncy ball. There were no sounds coming from it, and there was a single light shining from one part of the sphere, signaling whether the device was on or off. She placed the device onto the underside of Andrew’s elbow, who expected to feel something such as a sharp prick or a dull push. But during the second that the device was used, he felt nothing.
“What was that for?”
“To analyze your blood. The device took a sample of it and sent data to the computer over there.”
After Andrew looked at his elbow, he asked why there was no blood coming out since the device should have made a wound.
“It’s because only a few blood cells are necessary to be retrieved, along with some platelets and plasma. This device has a microscopic tube that will pierce through your skin and pull out painlessly, due to the fact that it’s too small for your nerves to detect it. Plus, your platelets have clotted up the hole already while your skin cells finish the job.”
“OK, but what about bacteria? Since you didn’t sanitize anything beforehand—”
“The device is coated with an antibacterial formula that kills any microorganisms in range as it punctures the skin—but it won’t harm your body, of course. Anything else?”
Andrew closed his lips in response.
With multiples of the same kind of device, this procedure worked similarly for everything else in his body. He had various fluids extracted with virtually no pain at all, even in areas that would make people wince from the thought: spinal fluid, sperm, synovial fluid, and even the fluid surrounding his eyeballs. The only thing that Lee didn’t take was stomach acid, considering how computers already retrieved data of it when Andrew relieved himself of some after teleporting. All of these fluids were tested and used to give the AOIB an idea of human composition.
Andrew was given a break before moving on to the next tests, which would involve looking at all the muscles and organs inside using a special light rather than surgery, similar to the Selentors’ methods. As intelligent beings connect with each other and become more modern, their ideas, traditions, etc. blend with each other and in time become one. Although enemies now, the AOIB once showed the Selentors their medical procedures so that they could move up in interstellar society with them.
The black-haired human sat down with questions and thoughts racing throughout his mind, trying to ignore all of them in order to give his mind a break. All this stress from all of these new things and ideas—everything was being rammed onto his mind like large rubber dodgeballs onto a wall. If there’s enough force and enough time applied to it, the wall will eventually break.
However, as Juvir noted previously when Andrew first saw the AOIB members, Lee was the type to ask plenty of questions herself.
“So, Andrew, are there any robots on your planet?”
“Yeah, but none of them are conscious or even intelligent. The most complicated robots I’ve heard of are just designed to trim hedges or play the violin or something. I think the best we’ve got so far is this social robot with the IQ of a dog.”
“I don’t know what dogs are, but do they at least seem conscious or intelligent? Do they have souls?”
Andrew was surprised to hear a robot bring up the term “souls” in a conversation. “Well, I suppose dogs at least have souls, considering they have emotions and free will.”
When most people think of free will, they think of doing the opposite of whatever someone wants them to do. However, in Andrew’s perspective, free will is just the ability to decide—to apply independent thought to some sort of situation. Dogs can have free will whenever a crisis occurs. If a dog is lost five hundred miles away from home, it can decide between three choices: to find a new home where it’s at, to make the journey all the way back to the first home, or to just give up and die. On the other end, some humans do not have free will because they have been raised without truly having independent thought; they accept whatever ideas other people throw at them and say, “But they are my own….”
However, almost all humans have consciousness because they think so much about themselves and their own existence. If robots have conscious
ness and free will, then what does that make them?
“Why do you ask?” said Andrew.
“It’s nothing important,” said Lee, “I just wanted to know what robots were like on Earth if there were any.” There was more on her mind than what she said, and Andrew could tell. That robot had a combination of miniscule gears, cables, levers, and shafts, all working to pull that artificial skin on Lee’s face into a specific form—an expression that one would typically have if they were hiding something.
Andrew wasn’t always one to ask many questions himself, though. All he wanted was to get through these tests. He said, “Let’s move on to the next part now.”
After having his insides observed with the special light, Andrew looked forward with his chin pressed onto his collarbone to see what was happening next. Lee pulled out an old-fashioned scalpel—she was definitely going to cut something up. Andrew needed to ask what that was for.
“This is for taking off those two reproductive organs you have there. Considering you’re not going to be reproducing anytime on this planet, they would just get in the way.”
The human was quite nervous at this point; from the looks of that scalpel, he believed this would not be so painless.
“Don’t worry, I’m giving you anesthetic for this.”
Most men would be more focused on all the emotional consequences after having their parts taken off. However, Andrew felt fine about the long-term effects. While on Earth, he decided that once he had two children, he would have those parts taken off; he believed they should be for reproduction and nothing more. Little did he know that they had functions for the body other than reproduction.
The procedure took between five and ten minutes, and it was, as a matter of fact, painless. . He also had his nipples taken off in the same way, since they really were useless for any male. That anesthetic was just astounding—Andrew didn’t notice that he was bleeding until Lee put artificial skin onto the bleeding areas. The first thought that crossed his mind at this sight was: That’s a LOT of blood…. The second one was the fact that he would always have to sit down on the toilet from now on.
Andrew was given another break once he could sit up—if he wanted to, of course. However, this break was much quieter than the one before. The final series of procedures was up next—the ones involving genetic alterations. Lee told him that, unfortunately, it was unavoidable to suppress any pain completely for this one. The anesthetic would likely interfere with the genetic changes. Regardless, it would be nothing compared to that lye-in-the-back incident on the Selentor ship.
“Have you seen any Selentors with darkened muscles that show through their skin?” said Lee.
“Yeah, a few.”
“That’s a result of genetic progress. That gene in particular changes your muscle content so that each and every muscle fiber is much more durable and powerful than before.”
“Really? How much stronger can I get with that?”
“Sorry, but you’re not getting that gene. At least not yet.”
Chapter 11
The level of pain wasn’t that bad—it was how long it lasted that made Andrew weary afterwards. Each genetic shot taken in was a similar process: a needle was inserted in Andrew’s torso, then an electrifying, almost burning sensation ran throughout his body. During each genetic change, he clenched his teeth together as he held back a shout, turning it into a sort of groan. Sometimes he would feel parts of his body growing or stretching. The entire procedure lasted over an hour, but it felt like an entire day.
The pain was understandable, however, once the dramatic changes had finished. Mid-way through, Andrew wanted to see a reflection of himself to see if anything was different at all. What he saw gave some compensation for the pain he endured. He appeared an entire foot taller, and his bones felt harder than stone. His physique seemed bulkier overall, giving him a new weight—if he was on Earth—of two hundred and thirty pounds. Lee had paused the procedure anyway because Andrew needed a food pill to be rejuvenated, to deal with all the physical changes.
The remaining genetic modifications, which involved regeneration and skin durability, seemed less painful than the ones before. Had he gotten used to it? Furthermore, he received a genetic change that would allow him to hear any language as familiar as English, making the translator on his ear redundant. How the hell does that even work?! The gene that he wanted most, but didn’t get, was the muscle-efficiency kind. Lee said that Andrew would have to increase his muscle mass before getting the gene. If he got the gene now, it would boost his strength, but he would never become any stronger. Many aliens have gotten this gene before improving muscle mass because they needed the strength quickly. The human, however, had all the time he needed, thus giving him the opportunity to become a better fighter.
“Well, Andrew, you’re finished. What do you want to do until Juvir comes back?”
“I need to use the bathroom,” stated Andrew urgently, his voice now slightly deeper.
Robots usually didn’t have to worry about eating, drinking, or using the bathroom, but they understood that organic beings had to. “Sure,” said Lee, “just go into the room down the hall that way.” Andrew faced right to see the general direction that she was pointing towards.
He sat up, feeling the extreme differences in his body. He was taller and heavier, making his coordination very outdated and pitiful as he stumbled off the table. He left the room while grabbing onto the walls and saw several doors on the right side of the hall. Maybe the directions were good enough for the other aliens, but Andrew was too dumb in comparison to figure it out right away. His intelligence hadn’t changed from the genetic tests. His only clue was that one door had a symbol on it of an ellipse with wavy lines going upwards from it. Around that were several arrows that curved and followed each other, forming a circle. Andrew took a guess that this was the way aliens symbolized waste—perhaps this was the bathroom. Or it could be a dumpster. Or even something completely different. The only way to know for sure was to go inside.
Andrew stepped in front of the door before it slid to the side. He stepped inside and found only an empty lit-up room with a floating mechanical object waiting there—a scanner, perhaps. Once the doors closed, the object projected a red, fan-like light across Andrew’s body. A voice came out from it when it finished: “Species: Human. Setting up waste relief system.”
Inside Andrew’s head, he thought, My species is already known to the computers around here? That was quick.
A cubic part of the floor quickly sprang up as a wide hole from its top opened up. It seemed suitable enough for Andrew to sit on it and do his business. He had a hard time trying to sit down, however—he would take a while getting used to his new body.
As he sat down to “relieve his waste”, as the device put it, he noticed that all he had in the front was a small hole from which urine came out of. Everything around there had already healed up because of the regeneration gene.
He sat up from the cubic toilet, curious to find any toilet paper, and saw another floating device appear in front of him. This one, however, sprayed a quick-drying substance onto the entire area—front and back—between his belly and his thighs, as well as his hands. It finished with the words: “Remaining waste and bacteria extinguished. You may exit.”
Andrew felt clean yet dirty at the same time because he didn’t use toilet paper or wash his hands like he would have done on Earth. However, when he gave it more thought, that substance did make him feel clean, so he decided it was all right and proceeded walking back to Lee.
As he entered the operation room, he noticed that Juvir was in there as well, and the crimson-skinned alien vice-president stated, “New toilet experience?”
Andrew said with embarrassment, “Yeah, it was….different.”
“I’ll bet it’s more sanitary than it is on Earth.”
“I wouldn’t expect too much, actually.” On Earth, soap typically removes 99.99 percent of the millions of germs on one’s hands; that still
leaves hundreds that are left there. The substance from earlier, however, reduced the number of bacteria from millions to single-digits.
“So this is what a genetically-improved human looks like. You definitely look like you have massive potential. Although you should put your suit back on.”
As Andrew put the black suit on again, he said, “No problem….er, what should I call you other than just ‘Juvir?’ Should I say it with ‘Vice-president,’ or something else, maybe?”
“No need to be so formal, Andrew. Think of me, yourself and everyone else here as equals, not superiors.”
This wasn’t quite so true to Andrew. Juvir had plenty of experience as a leader, was several times more intelligent, and he looked like his body wasn’t at all weak. Juvir was physically, mentally, and even socially more powerful than he was. Andrew couldn’t help but show his respect somehow. The best way he could do it for now was to do whatever Juvir wanted him to do.
“Understood, Juvir. By the way, now that I think about it, where’s the actual president of the AOIB? You said he was coming by in a couple of days.”
“He is. I was talking to him over the communicator about you the entire time that you were having your tests with Lee.” Lee had left the room by this point—her business with Andrew was done, and she knew it would be odd to stick around doing nothing.
“What’s he like? And why do I get the feeling that he’s never around much?”
“He’s an extremely busy person. He deals with all the negotiations and speeches with all the other planets while letting us representatives know what we should focus on. Luckily, he has a very high threshold, and his species does not need sleep whatsoever. I can’t quite match up to that. Although, as Vice-president, I have fewer duties to worry about and that lets me take you in with full responsibility.”
Andrew nodded his head in mild admiration. “What’s his name?”
“Xaphlos Worleger Eul-ta Canelpo. It’s a long and difficult name, I know.”