by Lucy Lennox
Lolly stood there watching us with moony eyes, and I could tell how happy she was for Xander. “Come inside, you two. I made some lemonade and cookies.”
“Oooh, what kind of cookies?” Xander asked like a little kid.
“Snickernoodles,” she said over her shoulder as we entered the building. “I also have some store-bought ones.”
“Do you have any Moon Pies?” Xander asked. I snorted and tried to stifle some nervous giggling.
“Xander,” Lolly warned, but I could hear the smile in her voice.
“What about Tits Ahoy?” he asked.
“Stop that, or I’m going to whip up a quick batch of Lemon Puckers and make you eat them one at a time. Slowly,” she said with a laugh. “Bennett, how about you? What kind do you like?”
“Oh, well, my favorite snack is raw nuts, but I’d be happy to nibble on a pucker if—”
Xander’s hand clamped over my mouth before I could finish the sentence. By the time we settled down on the comfortable seating in the main room of what I learned was the community gathering house, the three of us were laughing so hard I could barely breathe.
A handful of older men and women came in, completely nude, and wandered over to grab a cookie off the tray on the coffee table. I tried not to look at their bare breasts and limp dicks swinging and bobbing as they walked.
“Oh Lolls, these look amazing,” one woman said with a smile for Lolly. “Any chance you made your famous chocolate starfish cookies? Those are my favorite.”
“Not this time, Margaret. Sorry.”
Lolly introduced us to her friends and they all welcomed us with friendly smiles. I tried so hard to be cool with the random nudity, but it was still difficult to get used to. Xander reached over to grab my hand, and I realized I’d folded a paper napkin until it was nothing but a tiny square between my fingers. I looked up at Xander. “Sorry,” I mumbled.
“S’okay,” he said softly with a smile. “I’d rather you be nervous than turned on.” He winked at me and squeezed my hand while I rolled my eyes.
Once the group had grabbed the croquet set they were looking for, they exited the front door with waves and good wishes for a safe trip home.
Lolly turned back to look at us, but before she had a chance to speak, I opened my stupid fucking mouth.
“You can get naked if you want.”
Time seemed to stop and I wondered where the lever was for the secret door in the floor.
Dear god, tell me they have a secret door in the floor.
“I, ah, mean…” I swallowed, unsure how to say what I’d actually meant. “Oh god.”
“Benny?” Xander asked. I didn’t dare look at him. I could tell from the sound of his voice that he was beyond amused.
“Shut the fuck up,” I muttered. I got up the nerve to look up at Lolly and saw her eyes twinkling. Unfortunately, that’s not all I saw.
“Thank god. That dress itches like a bitch. I feel better now. Thanks, Bennett. Now, spill. I want to hear everything. Does this mean you’re taking my baby away from me?”
Even though there was a smile on her face, I could see worry lines around her eyes.
I tried to ignore the elephant’s boobs in the room and focus on her question.
“No. We’ve decided to settle here, in Haven. Hope that’s okay with you,” I said.
She let out a sound of relief as she stood up from her chair to grab for us, pulling us both into a hug.
If you could let go of the fact she was naked when she did it, the woman was a damned good hugger, and I had the errant thought that I could get used to feeling loved by Xander’s Aunt Lolly.
Was that perverted?
I looked at Xander as if he had the ability to read my mind and reassure me.
He winked, and I let out a sigh of relief. I tried to focus on what Lolly was saying.
“Oh my gosh, you’re really moving here? You and Xander are going to stay here?” she asked after sitting back in her spot.
Xander settled his arm around my shoulders and pulled me in close to his side. “I told Bennett about Gary offering to sell me the business on our drive up here. He’s hoping to retire before next year’s summer season.”
“Xander, that’s amazing. You’ll do a wonderful job with the lodge and expeditions. But, Bennett, what will you do? What do you do for a living?”
I looked at Xander before replying, “We’re going to buy the business together. I can run the business side while Xander does the expeditions. Hopefully, once we get everything running smoothly, I can start a youth adventure program for underprivileged kids. That’s the kind of work I’ve been doing in New York. I have some contacts there who might be able to help fund the first few trips to get us started. Then, if we market the concept well to other corporate foundations, we can help bring youth groups from all over the country here for backpacking, fishing and rafting trips.”
Lolly clapped her hands together. “That sounds absolutely wonderful. If there’s anything I can do to help, you just let me know. I just know it will be a success, though. Xander is very good with kids.”
She looked at him with pride and love, and I was struck by the realization that he had indeed landed in a good place with Lolly like I’d hoped. She clearly doted on him and seemed like a generous, loving soul. I was glad to know he’d wound up with someone as devoted to him as his father had been. But, then again, it made perfect sense. Lolly and Mr. Reed had been brother and sister. They both had the same gentle spirit and loving manner. I hoped like hell any kids we had in the future would inherit that same personality.
“Bennett, I wish Xander and I could have stayed in Greenwich. I didn’t want to take him away from everything that he knew— especially you. I know you two were close. After your dad told me we couldn’t stay in the cottage anymore—”
“What?” I blurted. “He kicked you out?”
Lolly glanced at Xander, who shook his head.
Her hand reached out to pat mine. “Sorry, honey. It doesn’t matter now.”
“I don’t understand. What did my father say to you?”
“He said we couldn’t stay in the cottage, and since Xander’s scholarship would be revoked—”
I felt my heart rate kick up and tried not to lose it. “He said Xander’s scholarship would be revoked?”
Xander put a hand on my cheek and swiveled my face so I was looking at him. “Baby, it doesn’t matter now, okay? It’s in the past. It’s all over now, and we’re together.”
I knew now wasn’t the time for me to rage about my father, so I forced myself to bite my tongue. As Xander told Lolly about Lucky and our trip, I only half-listened.
When Xander told Lolly about the night he caught some of the boys skinny-dipping in the lake, Lolly started giggling.
“When they grow up, send them our way,” she suggested. “Bear Trodden Acres could use some fresh meat around here.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. Her lightness was contagious, and I found myself enjoying her company even more.
“Well, I hate to break up our conversation, but I’m joining some friends for a game of tennis in a few minutes. Would you two like to come watch?”
“Sure,” I said, standing up.
Xander stood up and put his arm around my waist, squeezing my hip as if to send me a message. “No, actually. We have to get back to the lodge to check on the kids. Sorry we can’t stay, Lolly.”
After saying our goodbyes, we got back in the car and began driving down the lane toward the main road.
“Why didn’t you want to stay? The kids are busy with the ropes course for a little bit longer,” I asked.
“Babe, if you’d ever seen a naked tennis match, you’d understand.”
“I’m nervous,” I admitted as I waited for Xander to come around the car. I couldn’t contain my goofy smile as he automatically reached for my hand. Damn, I could so get used to this.
I would get used to it.
Because Xander was mine.
I still couldn’
t believe everything he was willing to do for me… to be with me. The fact that everything was changing so fast should have scared me, but it felt like my life was finally starting. I didn’t even care that my father would shit bricks when he found out that his plans for me had gone up in smoke the second Xander had told me he’d make the move to New York to be with me.
Because like I’d told Xander, I had no intention of remaining in New York.
Xander belonged in Colorado.
Which meant I did, too.
I’d fallen in love with this place as much as Xander had. It was scary as fuck to uproot my life, but I couldn’t wait to do it.
The idea of being a full-time father to a sixteen-year-old kid, however, was a little more daunting.
Okay, that was the understatement of the decade.
I was absolutely terrified by the prospect.
But I also wanted it. I wanted to give Lucky what Xander’s aunt had given him. The only question was, did Lucky want that?
First, I had to get Lucky to admit there was even a problem with his foster family. Between what Calvin had said and the bruise I’d seen for myself, along with some of the behavior Lucky had exhibited these past few months, I was pretty sure it was true.
“You’re going to do great,” Xander assured me. He pulled my hand to his mouth and kissed my knuckles. The move gave me the strength I needed. It took only a few minutes to find Lucky, because I’d called Aiden from the road and asked him to have Lucky waiting for us in the lodge’s lobby. Sure enough, when we walked through the doors, Lucky was sitting in one of the leather armchairs in front of the fireplace. He was flipping through some kind of outdoor adventure magazine.
“Hey,” I said as I led Xander to where Lucky was sitting. The kid jumped up and wrapped his arms around my waist. His eyes shifted to Xander’s and my joined hands.
“So does this mean I can sing the song?” he asked. He opened his mouth as if to start singing right there in the lobby, so I quickly clapped my hand over it.
“Maybe later,” I said. “And somewhere no one can hear you.”
He nodded, his eyes bright with humor, as I released him. “I’m happy for you, B,” he said as he gave me another quick hug. “Aiden said you wanted to talk to me,” he added.
“Yeah, let’s go for a walk, okay?”
Lucky nodded. I released Xander’s hand so I could put my arm around Lucky’s shoulders as we left the lodge and began walking along a path that surrounded the property. There was enough room for all three of us to walk side by side, but Xander held back just a little, presumably so Lucky wouldn’t feel boxed in.
“Lucky, I wanted to talk to you about something before we go home.”
“’Kay.”
I spied a picnic bench a few feet ahead of us and said, “Why don’t we sit?”
Once we were settled, with me sitting across from Lucky and Xander sitting next to me, I tried to figure out where to start.
“Lucky, I wanted to see how things were going with Gloria and Ed.”
The second Lucky dropped his eyes and began scratching his fingernail along the edge of the wooden table, I knew.
Fuck.
I managed not to say a word, but Xander must have sensed something, because his fingers curled over the hand I had fisted on my thigh beneath the table. He linked his fingers with mine.
“Good,” Lucky murmured.
“Are you having issues with them or any of the other kids staying there?” I knew Gloria and Ed were fostering four other kids, all younger than Lucky.
Lucky’s only response was to shake his head. He still refused to look at me.
“Lucky, would you look at me?” I asked gently. When he looked up, I saw that his eyes had gone blank.
It wasn’t the first time I’d seen that kind of reaction, but now I finally understood the reason for it. “You can tell me anything, Lucky.”
His eyes shifted to look at the scenery around us. “It’s not so bad,” he finally said.
I squeezed Xander’s hand hard and his thumb began tracing patterns into my skin. The move helped, since I had nothing else to occupy my hands like I normally did when I got anxious. I took a deep breath and focused on his touch for a few more seconds before saying, “Are they hurting you?”
Lucky refused to look at me as he spoke. “Sometimes they forget, you know?”
“Who?” I asked. “Forget what?”
He returned his eyes to the table. “The younger kids. They don’t always remember the rules. Ed gets mad ‘cause he likes it quiet when he gets home from work.”
“When Ed gets mad at the younger kids, do you do something to make him madder?” Xander asked.
Lucky hesitated and then nodded. I squeezed Xander’s hand so hard, I was shocked he didn’t make a sound.
I wanted to cry. To know the kid I’d helped get off the streets had ended up in a situation that was nearly as bad as the one he’d been in broke my heart. And it didn’t surprise me in the least that he’d put himself in harm’s way to protect the younger kids in the house.
“I’m sorry, Lucky,” I said softly. “I wanted to protect you—”
“It ain’t bad, B,” Lucky quickly interjected as he straightened. “It ain’t all the time like it was with Mom and Jerry.”
My throat felt too tight to speak and I looked helplessly at Xander. He squeezed my hand and then looked at Lucky. “Lucky, it’s not about settling for the lesser of two evils. You and all those other kids deserve to feel safe and wanted and loved.”
I reached across the table to cover Lucky’s hand with mine. “I’ll fix it when we get home, Lucky. I promise.”
His eyes held mine for a moment. “I know you will, B. You always take care of us… like we’re your real kids or something.”
I felt tears stinging the backs of my eyes, but I managed to keep them at bay. “That’s something else I wanted to talk to you about.” I had to muster up the courage to continue because I was suddenly afraid Lucky would turn me down. When the hell had I already started to think of him as my kid?
I glanced at Xander and he nodded.
Our kid.
“Lucky, I was wondering if you might want to come live with me and Xander for a while. Well… not for a while,” I babbled.
His eyes widened and he leaned back. “For real?”
Xander and I both nodded at the same time.
“So, you’d like, be my foster parents?”
“Um, no, not exactly. We… we want something more permanent. We were hoping… if you were okay with it, that is… that you might let us adopt you.”
Lucky’s eyes shifted back and forth between me and Xander. “You— you’d be my dads? Both of you?”
“Yeah, we would,” Xander said. “Bennett would adopt you initially, but once he and I are married, I’d adopt you too.”
I jerked my head to look at Xander. We hadn’t talked about marriage, but even hearing it on his lips, and said with such certainty, had my insides doing a happy dance.
He wants to marry me.
“You don’t have to make a decision now,” I quickly said as I forced my eyes back to Lucky. “There are a lot of details to work out with Children’s Services to make sure I qualify and stuff, but I started making some calls and it looks really good.”
“So, I’d live with you and still go to the same school and stuff?”
“Um, in the beginning, yes. But we’d probably end up leaving New York to come live out here,” I said.
I felt Xander squeeze my fingers again, and I knew why. He kept seeing us living in Colorado as some kind of sacrifice on my part. So I turned to him to remind him of the same thing I’d said over and over this morning when we’d talked about what the future held for us.
“Remember what I said, babe. This is your home. New York will never be to me what this place is to you,” I explained. “Hell, Greenwich hasn’t even been that for me… not after you left.”
He nodded and then leaned over to kiss me. �
�I love you,” he said softly against my mouth.
“Love you too.”
“Geez, are you guys gonna be playing kissy-face all the time when I come live with you? ‘Cause I’m telling you now, watching your dads make out is not cool.”
It took Lucky’s words a moment to register. “Does… does that mean you’re saying yes?”
He was barely done nodding when I reached him and pulled him into my arms. “Love you,” I said as I kissed the top of his head. Xander was there a moment later, his big arms surrounding us both.
And fuck if it didn’t feel like I was finally exactly where I was meant to be for the first time in my life.
Chapter 37
Xander
Three weeks back in New York, and I was already going stir-crazy. I missed the fresh air and clean expanse of the mountains, and the feeling of pavement underneath my boots instead of dirt, rocks and grass felt wrong to me. But I’d been handsomely rewarded for giving up that part of my life, even for a little while.
Because I got to wake up in Bennett’s arms every morning, and the last thing I felt every night before I fell asleep was his warm body pressed up against my side.
Upon returning to New York, Bennett had started the ball rolling on getting temporary custody of Lucky. His previous work with Children’s Services through his company’s foundation had proven to be an asset in fast-tracking the process of removing Lucky and the other kids from their foster home. We’d been worried that Lucky would have to spend some time in a group home or another foster home and had prepared him for that. But we’d caught a break when Bennett had gotten temporary custody of him. We’d both taken the required foster parenting courses in case that was the route we’d end up needing to go if the adoption couldn’t be pushed through quickly, but Bennett was doing all the legal stuff on his own.
It wasn’t ideal, since I’d already started to think of Lucky as mine, but I knew we couldn’t rush into making our own relationship legal, because that could likely cause issues down the line. Additionally, we figured with me still legally living in Colorado, it would just slow things down if we both applied to adopt Lucky at the same time. Lucky himself had more say in his future since he was sixteen. He’d already met with representatives from Children’s Services twice— once to talk about what Ed Durant had done to him and the other kids, and once to assure them he was completely on board with the adoption.