“That’s a very diplomatic way of putting it, N’Deena,” the Corporal smirked. “I think that my ass is still sore from all the butt-chewing that I got from that woman.”
She stood up. “Okay, let’s get you two situated. One question before we do that though: I know that you two are battle sisters. Is there anything more between you?”
“Corporal?” Kaly asked. Relationships in Basic hadn’t been discouraged, but they also hadn’t been encouraged either, not that anyone had had the energy for them at the time. She wasn’t entirely sure how to answer.
“That tells me what I wanted to know right there,” N’Darei replied. “It’s not like Basic here, troopers. The 115th is a family, and our CO, Col. Lislsdaater, understands how things are. If you two have something going with each other, that’s fine. We want you to be happy with your posting. Just make sure it doesn’t interfere with your jobs and it won’t be an issue.”
Kaly and Lena both relaxed when they heard this, and the Corporal didn’t miss the change. “I’ll make sure you get adjoining racks,” she reassured them. “Welcome aboard.”
N’Darei walked them over into Five-Bar. Although it was a new experience for Lena, Kaly already knew what to expect. The racks had seemed tiny when she had first laid eyes on them, but now they seemed positively palatial after the accommodations on Hella’s World.
This time, and because it was going to be their home for a while, she paid special attention to the personal touches that the troopers had made to their spaces. A holopic of a beach on Tethys, taped to a bulkhead caught her eye, as did several small vases of flowers sitting wherever there was space for them. She also took note of the bunks where the plain grey privacy drapes had been replaced with bright fabrics. When she got the opportunity, she was going to do the same things for their racks, and she was certain that Lena would agree.
Passing one row, Kaly heard music and turned towards the source. A trooper was sitting on the edge of her cot and playing a mandolin while some of her neighbors listened to her impromptu concert. The musician smiled at them as they walked by, and N’Darei nodded back.
A little further in, they encountered something that she didn’t recall on her first visit. It was a grey tabby-kaatze. He sauntered by as if he owned the entire deck, and gave them a brief inspection. Having managed to meet his minimum standards, he moved on to more important business.
“That brassy little fellow is Skipper,” the Corporal advised them. “He’s the Commander’s kaatze, but we’ve sort’ve been adopted by him, and he comes down here to see what kind of hand-outs he can get. We’re not really supposed to feed him, but he’s a master of the art of blackmail, so we have sort of an informal arrangement.”
Kaly laughed and Lena smiled shyly.
At last, they reached the final pod. “These are your racks,” N’Darei announced, indicating a pair of empty compartments. “One on top of the other like I said, and you’ll have some privacy back here. There’s storage under your beds and two lockers in the bulkhead that you can also use.’
“The PX here isn’t bad either; they’ve got plenty of personal items, and even a few things that you can pick up to make the place a little more personal. The rest you’ll pick up as you go through your tour.”
Then she handed them a pair of handheld data terminals. “And these are your pathminders. You’ll want to look them over, and use them until you get used to the ship’s layout. I’ll warn you right now though; the Athena’s a huge ship, and they’ll keep you from getting lost and starving to death in some side corridor. N’Deena knows what I’m talking about.”
They took them from her and then Lena noticed the grey plastic tarp that seperated the rack behind them from the rest of the pod. She nudged her battle sister and inclined her chin towards it.
“Who’s back there?” Kaly asked. But she already suspected that she knew what the answer was.
“Well…that’s where the neoman sleeps,” Corporal n’Darei answered hesitantly. “I’m really sorry about that, but we had to put him somewhere, and you two being new—“
“We understand,” Kaly assured her. “Corporal n’Valri told us all about him. As long as he doesn’t give us a problem, we don’t care.”
Lena nodded in agreement. “Really. It’s okay.”
“Now, that’s the attitude that we are under orders to have,” N’Darei declaired. “He hasn’t given us a problem yet, and he keeps to himself. But if you girls have any trouble from him, any at all, you come straight to me, or Troop Leader da’Saana, and we’ll have him in the brig so fast that your heads’ll spin into orbit. That’s a promise. And if you want to get new rack assignments, just say the word right now and as soon as they come up, I’ll move you.”
“We’ll just see how things go,” Kaly volunteered, “and let you know if anything happens.”
“That’s all we can do for right now, isn’t it?” N’Darei agreed. “Hey, are either of you hungry? The mess hall here is pretty good.”
“Yes, Corporal,” Kaly said, “We are.”
“Then come this way, gentleladies,” N’Darei said with exaggerated politeness, “and sample some of our fine cuisine. I think that a few of the girls from the unit are up there right now, and you can get a chance to get to know each other over chow.” Kaly and Lena dropped their packs and eagerly followed the Corporal out to the Lifts. Neoman or no, they were ready for a good meal.
***
The supply shuttle had brought up more than just Kaly and Lena. In addition to foodstuffs, medical supplies and spare parts, it had also carried something for Lilith. She was just finishing her shift in the Command Center, when a young Ensign from Navcom came up and saluted her.
“Ma’am?”
“Yes, Sailor?”
“Ma’am, I have a letter for you.” The young woman handed her an envelope. It was made of real paper, not a plastic flimsy.
Slightly surprised, Lilith took it from her. “Thank you, Sailor.”
Like most women, she had never received a real letter from anyone in her entire life. Most communications were performed electronically, or over long distances by satellites beaming the information through Null and back into normal space, through the aid of trained psi’s. ‘Hard copy’ only existed in the form of plastic flimsies. Real paper was extremely rare, and mainly limited to antique books owned by collectors.
It took her a moment to decipher the handwritten combination of Standard and Zommerlaandar characters before she realized who had sent it. It was from Ingrit. She opened it carefully, not wanting to damage the fragile envelope and unfolded the message within.
“My darling, Lilith,” it began, “I was lying here, in our room listening to the night and looking up at the stars. Something flew by, far overhead, and I thought of you out there, looking at the same stars.’
“I can still feel you lying next to me in the moonlight, and every once in a while, I think I can hear your voice saying something, or the sound of your laughter. At those times, the distance between us is a painful thing, but I tell myself that like Katrinn, you have an important job to do. One that is much more important than the desires of one poor farm girl.’
“But just the same, I miss you. Knowing that this letter will reach you, and be held by your hands, after being touched by mine, helps a little. In a small way, I think it brings us together again, at least for a while.’
“Take care of yourself out there, and come back to me when you can. I know that you know what you are doing, and have done it a thousand times, but this superstitious Zommerlaandar still prays every day to the Wise Ones, asking them to watch over you and keep you safe until I can hold you in my arms again.’
“I love you—Ingrit.”
Lilith put down the letter for a moment, considering it. She suddenly appreciated why the ancients had used them as a form of communicating, even long after the advent of electronic media. In a strange way, the handwritten message seemed to convey Ingrit’s words in a much more intimate and me
aningful manner than any display on a screen, or a printed flimsy, could have ever managed. She could almost feel Ingrit’s energy, lingering on the paper, and taking it back up, she realized that she could actually smell the subtle traces of Ingrit’s scent, mixed in with the aroma of fresh earth and grass that was Zommerlaand itself.
I love you too, Ingrit, she thought.
She got up from her chair, taking the letter with her. Her shift was over, and she had two things that needed attending to.
The first was a visit to the Athena’s PX. Goddess willing, they actually sold paper and a pen, or could at least order them for her. If not, then she knew that Sa’Vika could be relied upon to find it for her somewhere in the universe. The woman had a knack for accomplishing the seemingly impossible, and she always did it with a smile on her face.
The second thing was to keep a promise that she’d made.
***
“I see that you’ve come back,” Dana bel Hanna observed. “I had hoped that we would continue our conversation together.”
Lilith took her seat before the holojector. “I made a promise to you,” she said. “Part of that was to return, and the other part was to think over what you said the last time we spoke.”
“And did you, Commander?” the matrix asked.
“Yes,” Lilith replied, “I have, and I must admit that your description of your life after your translation intrigued me.”
“I sense a certain level of hesitation in your voice, however,” Bel Hanna observed. “It certainly doesn’t take a great deal of processor power to understand that a full acceptance on your part wouldn’t require any further conversation between us. There would have simply been an addition to your file asking that the translation be performed when you died.”
“A very accurate assessment,” Lilith admitted. “And completely correct. There is one thing that I have to know before my mind is made up.”
“And that is?”
“I know from your file that you had relationships when you were in your body, and that you even married. Do you ever think of her? Do you ever miss her?”
“How do I go on without her?” Bel Hanna interjected. “Isn’t that the rest of your question? How did I leave an entire life behind and move on to another existence?”
“Yes,” Lilith replied. “I find it hard to understand. You see, I’ve met someone, and I think that when the time is right, that we may have a life together, even daughters. It’s hard for me to imagine having that, and then living another life without her.”
“I understand, Commander,” Bel Hanna said. “I had the same questions when I was in a physical body, but now that I exist as a personality matrix, I realize that they were more a statement of my own ignorance than anything else. I mean no insult by that. I simply say it as an admission of my own limitations at the time.’
“I loved my wife when I was in a body and we shared a life together that was full and rewarding. And when the Goddess decided that it was time for me to die, that life ended, but not my memories of it, or of the ones that I loved.’
“I still love her, even now, and I know from my experience being translated, that we are not destroyed by death, but transformed, just as I was. My transformation was artificial of course, but in the greater scheme of things, it was merely a variation on what the divine intends for us all. The ancients were right, Commander; reincarnation really does exist and the spirit is eternal.”
Lilith was certainly familiar with the concept. In her own faith, it was accepted that the soul went into darkness, and then renewed itself like the Moon Goddess Herself, waxing, waning, and waxing again, eternally. As a mortal woman though, death was still a very daunting thing to consider.
“I can tell by your increased heart rate that the subject alarms you,” Bel Hanna said. “I apologize for eavesdropping, but it is hard to ignore. I also appreciate how you feel. You have what you have, and your faith tells you not to be concerned, but the darkness is still out there.”
“Yes,” Lilith confessed.
“Understandable,” Bel Hanna replied, “but I submit that you already have proof of a sort.”
Lilith arched an eyebrow. “Do I now?”
“Yes. Your proof is your own existence in your current body. It is not the same body that it was when you were born, and you are not the same person that you once were.’
“With each passing day, every cell in it has changed and been replaced, and you have also changed as a person; from the girl that you once were, to the woman you are now. You have, in a small way, been born, died and been re-born many times already. Why should it be any different in the larger scheme of things?”
“An interesting observation,” Lilith said. “You should have been a Priestess.”
“Perhaps in another life I will be,” Bel Hanna laughed. “And perhaps in a past life, I was. But to return to your central issue, I would offer you some advice.”
“And that is?”
“Live. Love this woman of yours and have your life together, and when your time finally comes, honor her through the eternity of your memories.”
“I will,” Lilith answered.
“Then I will look forwards to the day when you are translated, and if you allow it, to share in your memories of this wonderful woman of yours. In the meantime, Commander, be well.”
Lilith rose from her seat and the holographic image of Bel Hanna disappeared. For a moment, she listened to the soft hum of the ship’s computer reverberating through the walls, and considered the conversation. Then she left the chamber and headed down to Ellyn n’Dira’s office.
As always, the woman was hard at work, but she stopped what she was doing and greeted her. “Commander? What brings you down to the dungeons?”
“I need to have my will amended,” Lilith said.
***
That same evening, Kaly and Lena lay together in Kaly’s bunk. They were half-asleep when they heard Jon enter the pod. There had been plenty of gossip about the neoman at dinner, but because he had been away on work details and visiting the ship’s doctor, they had yet to actually encounter him. When Jon walked past their rack, Lena opened her eyes and sat up.
“I think he’s here!” she whispered excitedly.
“Come back to bed!” Kaly urged. “I’ve heard enough about him for one day.”
“I have to see what he looks like!” Lena declared. As shy as she tended to be, she was always the first one to show any interest in a mystery, and Kaly thought that she was sometimes too curious for her own good. Before she could object any further, the young woman had gathered up the blanket around her and worked her way over to the corner of the alcove.
“Lena!” Kaly exclaimed, “Come back here!” But Lena was already peeking around the privacy drape, and finally, Kaly moved up to join her.
Jon had his back to them, and he was lifting the tarp that separated his rack from everyone else’s. With all of the commotion that Lena had made, Kaly was certain that he knew that they were watching him, but he didn’t acknowledge their presence. Instead, he walked around the tarp and let it drop behind him. A moment later, the light from over his rack came on, glowing through the thin plastic sheet.
“Did you see him?” Lena asked her. “He was huge! They told us that he was big, but I don’t think I’d even come up to his chest!”
“Yes,” Kaly replied, putting a hand to her shoulder. “I did, and he was gigantic. Now, please, Lena, come back to bed.”
Lena hesitated, and risked one more glance in the direction of Jon’s sleeping area before she allowed Kaly to pull her away. Once she was back in her lover’s arms, her expression became thoughtful. “You know something, Kaly?” she finally said. “He didn’t look like an ape at all.” Several of their companions at dinner had described him that way.
“No,” Kaly agreed sleepily, “He didn’t.”
A short silence passed between them, and then Lena added. “It must be lonely for him back there, all by himself. I think that’s rather sa
d.”
Kaly sighed and gathered her closer. “Yes, probably so.” Thankfully, Lena let the conversation die there, and the two of them managed to drift off to sleep.
Jon was already gone when their psievers woke them, and the two women dressed in their fatigues and reported to Corporal n’Darei.
“You two have a work detail today” she informed them. “You’ll be helping engineering down on deck 24, passage 5, sub-passage 14. They’ve had some leaks in the water pipes down there and they need us to help with the repairs. Private bel Freda is in charge of the Marine end of things. Get down there and see what she needs.”
Kaly and Lena saluted the woman and using their pathminders, found their way down to the work detail. Private bel Freda put them right to work.
“The engineers got the replacement pipe up inside the wall already,” the Private advised them, “They’re having us check the couplings while they run some water through the line to check the seals. You two can go down to the end of the passage and help out.”
She pointed down the corridor to two hatches in the overhead and a pair of Marines who were already up inside on ladders. There were open toolboxes at the foot of each ladder. Kaly took her place at the foot of the furthest ladder and Lena went over to the nearer one.
As she did so, the Marine above her dropped their wrench, and started to come down to retrieve it. It was Jon fa’Teela.
Private bel Freda was walking by right as this happened. She glanced down at the tool, and then stepped over it and walked on without making any move to pick it up. Lena grimaced, and handed it up to him.
“Here,” she said.
Jon took it and rewarded her with a small, half-smile. “Thank you.” Compared to her, his hand was huge and hairy, and the deepness of his voice startled her, but she still managed to meet his eyes and return his smile.
Bel Freda noticed the exchange, and gave them a disapproving glare. But she said nothing and went over to the end of the passage to speak with one of the engineers instead.
Kaly had also witnessed it, and the Private’s reaction. Later, after their work had been completed, she spoke with her battle sister on the lift.
Sisterhood of Suns: Pallas Athena Page 62