* * *
Slade pulled up in front of Tory’s small, one-story white house surrounded by large oaks and maples and felt as though he had come home. Tory rose from a white wicker chair on the porch and waved. Peace rippled through him. Clasping the steering wheel, he closed his eyes for a few seconds to relish that feeling. He could imagine her fragrance of lilacs, the light in her eyes when she smiled, and he held on to that serenity for a couple of seconds longer. Then reality blanketed him in a heavy cloak of guilt. Exhaustion cleaved to him, sharpening the sensation there wasn’t enough time in a day to correct what had happened to his daughter.
The aroma of the pizza wafted to him, reminding him that he’d brought dinner and he was hungry. Sliding from the car, he grabbed the three boxes and headed for the porch.
Tory’s eyes lit with that sparkle that always made him feel special. He responded with his own grin, saying, “I hope you two are hungry. I got medium ones for everyone.”
“Medium! Who else is coming?” Tory stepped to the swing and nudged his daughter who lay curled on the yellow cushion, sleeping.
Mindy’s eyes blinked open. She rubbed them as she propped herself up. “Dad-dy!”
She started to get to her feet, but Slade motioned for her to remain sitting. He brought her pizza box to her and opened it on the seat next to her.
“Why don’t we eat out here? I’ll go get some lemonade for us to drink.” Tory rushed inside, the screen door banging closed.
Mindy stared at her pizza but didn’t pick up a piece.
“Aren’t you gonna dig in? I thought half of it would be gone by now.” Slade sat in a chair across from his daughter.
“Can’t. Wait—for Tor-ee. We always—say a—” Mindy squinted “—prayer be-fore eat-ing.”
“Oh, right,” he murmured, remembering a time when he, Carol and Mindy used to do that—before the accident, before his world had been turned upside down and inside out. “How was your day?”
“The—best!” His daughter’s expression came alive. “I—helped. I got—to—ride.”
“You’re becoming quite the rider.”
Mindy straightened her shoulders, her chin tilting at a proud angle. “Yep.”
Tory pushed the screen door open with her foot. Slade rose and quickly took the pitcher of lemonade from her. After the drinks were served, she sat in the chair next to Slade’s, across from Mindy.
“We—wait-ed,” Mindy said, carefully putting her glass on the table next to the swing.
Tory bowed her head with Mindy following suit. Slade stared at them for a few seconds, then lowered his. The words of the simple prayer weaved their way through his mind. Had he given up on God too soon? Had he been wrong to stop going to church, to keep Mindy at home? Tory seemed to draw comfort from the Lord. But then she hadn’t been responsible for her child struggling each day—
“Dad-dy!”
Mindy’s voice penetrated his thoughts. He looked up to find both of them were staring at him as though he were an alien from outer space. His daughter had a piece of pizza in her hand, one bite taken from its end. Tory had nothing. Then he realized he still held the other two boxes in his lap. He quickly passed Tory’s to her and opened his own.
“I’ll share if you’re that hungry,” Tory said in a teasing tone.
“Even though I forgot to eat lunch, that one is all yours. The least I can do is provide dinner for you after you watched Mindy for me.”
“Looks like I got the better end of the deal. You shouldn’t work so hard that you forget to eat.”
“Had a flight to catch and a gal to get back to. A mighty pretty gal if I do say so myself.” His gaze strayed to his daughter.
Mindy giggled, her mouth stuffed with food. She started to say, “Da—”
“Nope. No words from the peanut gallery, especially when a certain pretty gal’s mouth is still full of pizza.”
Giggling some more, Mindy covered her mouth.
Tory watched the exchange between father and daughter, the love deep in their eyes. Mindy washed her food down with a big gulp of lemonade.
Slade leaned over and handed his daughter a napkin, pointing to her chin. “You have a red beard.”
Father and daughter’s shared laughter pricked Tory with longing. She wanted that with a child. She wanted a family. And time was running out for her. She didn’t see any way she was going to accomplish that goal. Too many obstacles.
“Was your business trip successful?” Tory settled back in her chair, her stomach knotted.
Picking up his pizza laden with everything but the kitchen sink, Slade said, “Things are proceeding according to my plans. Hopefully I won’t have to travel as much in the future.”
Mindy clapped. “Goo-dy!”
“I figured you would like that,” Slade said, taking a bite of his food.
The little girl popped the last piece of her third slice into her mouth, then took a large swallow of lemonade. Pushing herself to her feet, she said, “Save—for—later?”
“Sure, but I thought you were hungry?” Slade’s brow knitted in question.
“My—show—is on.” She started for the door.
“Show? What show?” Slade asked as his daughter banged the screen door closed behind her.
Tory shrugged. “Beats me. She doesn’t watch much TV when she’s here.”
“She’s always been a fast eater, but she beat her record this time.”
“I think she wanted to leave us alone so I could talk to you.”
The frown lines deepened as he shifted his blue gaze to her. “This doesn’t sound good. What happened?”
Her stomach muscles constricted even more, tension taking a firm grip on her. “Mindy doesn’t like Mrs. Davies.”
“Why?”
“She overheard the woman calling her a crippled retard to someone on the phone. She doesn’t think Mrs. Davies likes her.”
Anger slashed across his face. He flexed his hands then balled them. “A crippled retard?”
Her own indignation stiffened her spine. She remembered the hurt in Mindy’s voice and expression when she had told her earlier and wanted to demand Slade do something about it.
He tossed the pizza box he held onto the swing and surged to his feet. Every line in his body spoke of his rage. “She came highly recommended. Her references were excellent. How can—?” He paused, opening and closing his hands again, took a deep breath and continued. “How can anyone say that?”
“I don’t know,” Tory said, having a hard time herself understanding why Mrs. Davies would say that about Mindy, even if the woman didn’t know the child was listening.
Slade scrubbed his hands down his face, then plopped down onto the swing, facing Tory. “What do I do now? I can’t have someone like her taking care of Mindy, but I need someone to watch my daughter. Mrs. Davies was the best applicant from the batch I had. I—” He snapped his mouth closed and stared at a place behind Tory. When he reestablished eye contact with her, a bleak look was in his expression.
Tory resisted the urge to toss the pizza box to the floor and slip into the place next to him on the swing, taking his hands within hers. It was tempting, but she sat frozen in her chair, watching a play of emotions flit across his features.
A hopeful gleam appeared in his blue eyes. “Unless you’d like to take the job.”
For a moment Tory forgot about her ranch and the horses, her dream, and thought about accepting the offer, turning her back on the past four years. She loved Mindy and didn’t want someone else looking after her. But she couldn’t walk away from her dream and the people who depended on her, Mindy being one of them. “I’ve grown to love your daughter. I’d be glad to have Mindy come out here, but that’s a short-term solution. We could do that until you find someone else.”
“But you’re perfect for Mindy. She’s always talking about you. She’s so comfortable at your place. Isn’t there a way we could work this out?”
“It doesn’t seem practical.” Regret t
inged her voice. She thought of the long hours she had to spend taking care of the ranch as it was right now. She could manage to help for a while, but without assistance with the ranch, everything would catch up with her. She could only do so much. “There’s so much I have to do around here. Going back and forth to town would be very time-consuming.”
“What if I moved out here?”
Surprise widened her eyes. “Where?”
He shrugged. “Here?”
“Here!” Her mouth went dry and perspiration cloaked her forehead.
“Yes.” Slade rose. “There’s got to be something that could work.” He began to pace as though he needed to keep moving in order to gather momentum. “Maybe we could get married? For Mindy.” The second he said those words, he halted, his eyes huge with shock.
“Married?” Stunned, Tory watched him begin walking again from the swing to one end of the porch, then back.
CHAPTER FIVE
“Yes, married,” Slade said, moving toward her. He came to sit across from her, pulling his chair closer so that his knees were only inches from hers, the shock replaced with enthusiasm. “I could help you with this ranch. You could hire someone to assist you. You’ve been worried about money. With my expansion nearly completed, my company’s going to be doing well. Money won’t be a problem. We could help each other.”
Still stunned, Tory listened to his words as though she were a bystander observing the scene from above. She had a hard time getting past the word married. “But—” Nothing else came to mind.
“Don’t answer me right now. Think about it. We’re friends. We both care for Mindy. You would be a terrific mother for her. In fact, I can’t think of anyone better for that role. Mindy needs someone like you in her life on a permanent basis. This could be a good partnership.” The eagerness in his voice made his words rush together.
Marriage? Partnership? Was that a possibility? She’d given up hope of ever getting married, even though she wasn’t quite thirty. She’d given up hope of ever trusting enough to have a real marriage. Desperate, Tory grasped on to a sane rational reason not to go through with his proposal. “Marriage is a serious step. There’re so many things involved.”
Leaning forward, he clasped her hands. “I know. That’s why I don’t want you to give me an answer right away. Think about it.”
“You should, too.” The intensity in his gaze burned heat into her cheeks. “I mean we aren’t in l—” She couldn’t seem to say the word. It lumped together in her throat and refused to come out.
“We aren’t in love?” One brow quirked. “No, but we are good friends. I can tell you things I haven’t told another. I trust you one hundred percent with my daughter.”
The last sentence produced a surge of pride. For a moment she relished that feeling, but then reality took over, bringing her back to the problem at hand. “But what if you find someone later who you fall in love with and want to marry? To me, marriage is forever.”
A shadow crossed over his face, darkening his eyes as if a storm gathered in them. He pulled away and stood. “I won’t. I had that once in my life.” He paused, angled his head and asked, “But have you?”
Tension constricted her muscles until she had to force herself to relax. The drill of his gaze prodded her to answer by shaking her head. She didn’t think she could ever trust someone that completely that she could let down her guard and fall in love. To be in love was to give more of herself than she thought possible.
“Then perhaps you’ll fall in love one day and want to marry?”
She came to her feet, face-to-face with him, only a yard separating them. “No, I won’t.”
“Why not? You have so much to offer any man.”
But not you, came unbidden into her mind, and she wondered why her heart contracted with that thought. She knew she needed to say something, but what? Silence stretched between them; the only sound drifting to her was from the people talking on the television show Mindy was watching.
Slade took one step closer. “Why not, Tory? You’re a warm, generous person. You would be a perfect mother. I’ve seen you with Mindy and the other children you work with.”
She wanted to back away, but the chair was behind her. For a few seconds she felt trapped, her heart quickening its pace, her breathing becoming shallow. No, this is Slade. A friend. Mindy’s father. Someone she’d been alone with many times. She forced deep breaths into her lungs and said, “I was badly hurt once.”
“What happened?”
The question, spoken low, the words laced with compassion, focused all of Tory’s attention on the man before her. Painful memories, buried deep, threatened to swamp her. She shoved them back into the dark recesses of her mind, where she was determined they would remain. “Not important now.”
He covered the small space between them and took her hands. “I’m a good listener.”
The warm, comforting wrap of his fingers about hers attested to the man she had come to know, a man who loved his daughter so much he would marry Tory to give Mindy a mother. “I know.”
“When you’re ready, I’ll be here for you.”
His quiet statement mesmerized her. She found herself leaning closer, the scent of his lime aftershave enveloping her in a protective cocoon. He released one hand and cupped her face. She stared into the blue depths of his eyes, no longer stormy but gleaming like diamonds on water. She felt herself become lost, drawn toward his kindness. Was it possible to be more than friends? The honking sound of a flock of geese flying overhead broke Tory’s trance.
She pulled back and to the side, forcing a smile to her dry lips. “I appreciate your offer, but to me what has happened in the past is best left in the past.” When several feet separated them, Tory turned toward him.
Slade picked up the boxes of pizza. “I’d better get Mindy home. I need to call Mrs. Davies and tell her I no longer need her services.”
“Bring Mindy out here tomorrow morning. I’d love to watch her until—”
“Until you decide about my proposal?”
She nodded. “Or, you find someone to take care of Mindy.”
His gaze linked with hers. “I’ve already found someone.”
* * *
Moonlight streamed through the window in the living room and pooled on the floor near Tory’s feet. Darkness cloaking her, she stared at the circle of light as though there was an answer to Slade’s question written in it. But for hours she had fought the demons of her past and still she was no closer to an answer now than she was when she had tried to go to sleep at midnight.
Silence surrounded her. Usually she liked the quiet that reminded her she was alone. But not this evening. She wanted the silence to be filled with the laughter of children, with the voices of daughters and sons. Slade had dangled a dream in front of her—to be a mother. And she couldn’t think of a more beautiful child to be her daughter than Mindy.
Pushing herself to her feet, Tory navigated around the coffee table and headed for the kitchen. She flipped on the overhead light and brightness flooded the room, causing her to blink. She put a pot of water on to boil, then sat at the table and waited.
Should she risk marriage to Slade to fulfill her dream? She folded her hands together and bowed her head. Dear Heavenly Father, please help me make the right decision. There’s a part of me that thinks this is the right thing to do. But then my fear takes over and I don’t know what to do anymore. I care for Slade. He’s a good man. And I love Mindy like she is my own child. Please give me a sign showing me the way.
A high-pitch whistle disturbed the quiet, startling Tory. She leaped to her feet and hurried to the stove to remove the kettle. After fixing herself a cup of herbal tea, she sat again at the table, her elbows resting on its wooden top.
What to do? The second hand on the wall clock sounded—tick, tick, tick. Seconds merged into minutes and still no answer.
Nibbling at the back of her mind was the one thing that was stopping her. Being a true wife in every sense for
Slade. Could she do that? They hadn’t discussed that part of a marriage, but she wasn’t naive. She knew he was a man in every sense of the word and would want more from her than she might ever be able to give.
With her eyes closed, she sipped at her tea and tried to imagine life as Slade’s wife, as Mindy’s mother. The child’s laughter, her smile, filled Tory’s mind. Mindy’s need for a mother sliced through her defenses, urging her to take the risk and deal with the consequences later. If only she could—
* * *
Slade prowled his dimly lit den, too restless even to sit. Beyond the picture window he saw that night had lightened to a dark gray. Soon dawn would color the eastern sky with oranges and pinks. Soon his daughter would be up and ready to go to Tory’s for the day, eager to spend time with the woman she had grown to love like a mother over the past few months. Soon he would see Tory again.
What would she tell him today?
That question had plagued him all night to the point he hadn’t been able to sleep. One part of him was so stunned he had asked Tory to marry him, but the other felt as though it was the answer to all his problems and the best thing for his daughter. And he would do anything for his daughter. The most important was righting what his child had gone through these past couple of years, giving her back as normal a life as possible.
He could still see the flash of red out of the corner of his eye as the truck ran the light. He could still hear the crunch of metal as the pickup plowed into the passenger’s side of his car where his wife sat. And he could still hear his daughter’s screams and his wife’s moans—the last sounds she made before slipping away. There were times when he imagined the scent of blood and gasoline still hung in the air and the wail of sirens shrieked closer.
If only— He buried his face in his hands and tried to block the images from his mind. He wanted to leave the past in the past as Tory had. But every time he looked at Mindy he was reminded that he had survived with only a few bruises and cuts while his family had suffered.
What had Mindy done to deserve this kind of punishment? What had he done? All he had ever wanted was to love and protect his family. He had failed his daughter once. He wasn’t going to again. Tory was the best thing for Mindy, and he was determined to persuade her to marry him and give his daughter the family she deserved.
A Family for Tory Page 6