I just had to get Cerberus to like me.
First things first: the drinking. I finished off my glass and helped myself to a second, then a third; and when I was feeling comfortably tipsy, I rose to the gray door that hung between my apartment and hers. I didn’t doubt the dog was still waiting patiently for Valentina to return, but he was also going to be hungry, and how well he would receive me, was unbeknownst to me.
On second thought, I returned to my kitchen and conjured six of the biggest steaks I could imagine, towering them onto a plate and bringing them to the door. I steeled myself for whatever lay beyond, and pushed the door open. Consequently, nothing happened. If the dog was around, he didn’t even notice the door opening, which made me, only somewhat, concerned.
Trying not to draw too much attention to myself, I slipped along the wall to the kitchen and set the steaks out in three piles of two, before leaning back against the counter and whistling.
As I stood there waiting, I longed for another glass of whiskey, so the apartment provided. Just as I brought it to my lips, I heard the bounding footsteps of the three-headed dog make its way to me.
It paused only for a moment, to growl at me ferociously, as though sensing I was to blame for Valentina’s mysterious absence, when the smell of raw meat overwhelmed it. Great lobs of drool escaped from its jowls, before it bent low and each head began tearing into the flesh. I raised my eyebrows in mild disgust, before sipping again from my drink.
I could still feel Hades scratching at the back of my mind and only a few more bottlefuls would help sustain that problem. So, I focused on enjoying what little buzz I had, and keeping myself alert in front of this great beast I wasn’t entirely sure liked me.
Cerberus finished off the last of the steaks, before sitting back on his haunches and staring at me. Feeding him, so far, was proving to be a wise decision.
“Hey, bud.” I held my hand out tentatively, watching as the three heads stared at it in interest. I took another tentative step toward them, hoping to close some of the distance, as my fingertips brushed against the edges of his fur. He still didn’t move; so I, finally, moved as close as I dared and patted the first head I reached.
At least he didn’t bite my fingers off. Cerberus growled loudly and I jumped back, letting out a shaky laugh, before running my hand through my own hair instead.
“It’s fine if you don’t like me. I was never good with dogs anyways. But I need to bring you back with me to Valentina. She wants to see you.” His interest peaked and I watched as six ears lifted with intrigue.
Shoving my hands into my pockets, I forced a smile at the dog, “yeah. She’s in the Underworld right now and would like for you to join her.” Cerberus barked in response, so I bobbed my head back.
“Good, good... Okay, well, let’s go back to my apartment. I just need another drink or two, then we’ll go and see her.”
Cerberus took off through the doorway I’d left open, making me sigh with relief, before following him through. Technically, I supposed, Cerberus belonged to me. But I was glad that Valentina had taken him on instead. Something about a pet dog having three heads unnerved me to no end. I had enough to deal with when it came to my willful God, I didn’t need to be worrying about a potentially lethal pet living with me as well.
I grabbed the whiskey bottle, forgoing a glass, as I downed what I could without needing a breath. Pulling away with a gasp, I took a few deep breaths, before doing it again. I didn’t know if this was going to help or not, she still might be reeling from our first encounter. But, the only thing I knew, was I was simply not equipped to deal with raging female emotions. I never had been and never would be.
I wanted to do this on my own, without Hades’ help. It was neither helpful nor practical when he was involved, so it was best I go alone on my endeavor.
Finishing my last gulp, I set down the bottle, already feeling the tingling set into my body, as the alcohol worked its way through my system. Hades was long forgotten, for now, and all I had to worry about, was steering a three-headed dog to the Underworld.
Cerberus looked on expectantly, and somewhat judgmentally, I found, when I finally turned to him. I pointed him to the wall and recalled the words Hades used to open the doorway to our realm.
“Eisago Thanatos.” The door opened before me, and I looked down at Cerberus with a grim expression. “Well, after you.”
Chapter 4
The dog bounded through first and I followed reluctantly. As far as my original plan had gone, I wanted to come here and do a little damage control after their earlier spat. But standing on the threshold now, I realized, I knew nothing about dealing with emotions, especially, not emotions as passionate as those belonging to Hades and Persephone. The more I considered it, the more I saw just how ill-planned this venture was.
How would he react, knowing I had undermined him? He insisted that what he was doing was for the best. Placing her in a similar situation to her past had drawn Persephone out and given him the chance to try and correct whatever bad blood still lay between them. Who was I to meddle in the affairs of Gods?
“Hello, my love, hello... Yes, I missed you too,” she gushed over the dog, as I stood there awkwardly watching her receive a plethora of slobbery kisses. I dug my hands deeper into my pockets and decided, immediately, the only course of action I had, was to pretend like I was Hades, and maybe then course-correct some of the things he had said. Not that was I overly confident in my ability to sound like my pig-headed God.
“I never understood why he liked you better than me,” I said casually, gauging her reaction since I’d last seen her.
“I understand love better than you do,” her voice was curt and to the point. She was still mad.
“I understand love perfectly,” I said, pushing myself through the threshold and moving toward her slowly.
“Love is not a possession you can grasp.” I wanted to wince, knowing it was true. But Hades believed that if he didn’t hold onto something he loved, it might walk away and leave him alone forever. I understood the sentiment perfectly. How many times in my mortal life had I seen the very same thing happen?
But wincing was not the answer Hades would give. So I waved my hand at her, trying to act dismissive, before conjuring a glass of wine for courage.
“Have you changed your mind?” I swirled the dark bouquet, watching it with interest, before chancing a glance up to her.
“Of course not, I stand by my original position. Let us go and let love form organically. Maybe there is a place for you in my heart, but you will never know so long as you try to worm your way in, like the maggots which claim a home in the vessels of your subjects.”
The liquid transfixed me, staring at the waves I created within the small dome. Channel Hades, Channel Hades, Channel Hades... The voice in my head echoed repeatedly, pleading to the silent cosmos, to give me another burst of Death God-like inspiration.
“Beautiful imagery, my love,” I finally bustled, hoping it was believable enough.
“It’s true. You act like nothing more than a parasite. And I will think of you as nothing but a parasite, until you show me that the last few thousand years have changed you.” Thankfully Persephone was riding her high horse this afternoon, leaving me little room to reply. I was content with that; very rarely, did I enjoy indulging myself in lengthy conversations. Plus, the less I had to say, the less she would be on to me.
But it was my turn to reply, “Why don’t I show you how wrong you are?” I tried to exude the same charm and arrogance Hades did, knowing it would annoy her. I sipped the wine for a little more courage, then stepped toward her.
“Don’t touch me, I am not yet yours to touch.”
From what I knew of their sordid pasts, having permission to touch was not something Hades asked for. Like most Gods, when he felt he was owed something, he took it, no matter the cost.
“That didn’t stop me last time.” It was a lame retort, but I figured it would be Hades-like enough.
> “Yes, I know. And that is what I am talking about. You cannot simply claim whatever you want, love is not like that.”
“My perfect brother claims what he wants.” I wanted to draw her away from being defensive with me, deflecting to Zeus only seemed logical. Hades had never given the impression Aidan’s God was his favorite.
“No, he seduces what he wants.” Instinctively I frowned.
Aidan could always get his way with a smile and a flirtatious comment. I could never do that, even in my old life. Turning clients, had always been difficult due, in part to my standoff nature. Sure, I could be charming if I wanted to, but charm and seduction were very different things. Charm could convince someone to tolerate you, like you even for a fraction of an hour. Seduction convinced people to love you, to worship you. I had never been capable of that, nor had Hades.
“There is not a seductive bone in my body,” I said truthfully, finishing off the wine, although it immediately refilled itself.
“No, but there is a romantic one. You can love greatly. I know you yearn for companionship, but not the kind Zeus craves. You are seeking a partner, someone who can love you without needing to change your dark ways...”
I was taken back for a moment, surprised that my plan had worked. Not only that, but my nanosecond of insecurity had somehow endeared myself to Persephone enough to let her relax a little, show a more understanding side. She knew her role in this relationship was one of a cheerleader, and unlike some women, who would be burdened by such a need, she almost relished it.
“You’ve always understood me better than others, Percy...” The words rolled off my tongue as I sealed it with a gentle brush of my fingers, moving a strand from the middle of her forehead back behind her ear.
“Hades,” her tone wasn’t angry, but tired. She knew what I was up to and she was reluctant. Perhaps a part of her wanted to give in, but her pride stood in its way.
“Please, my love...” I began, licking my lips as I tried to pull out memories of my charm from my past life, “Don’t torment me like this.” Five simple words and I could see her eyes soften further. She was going to give in, a spring of hope gushed through me and it almost showed on my face.
Then, she spoke, “Hades. You must prove to me you have changed.” I sighed heavily with annoyance. Back to square one, and I was running out of ideas, not to mention, a little concerned she might be on to me. It was crushing maintaining this façade, a personality so completely opposite to my own.
“And there is no way of doing that, for once you have set your stubborn opinion, there is no swaying of it.” The formal dialect tripped on my tongue, as I anxiously watched her face to see if she noticed. But it was the words that affected her, just more proof in the growing pile in favor of her stubbornness.
“That’s not true. For if it was, your case would be lost, as I would be completely incapable of loving you.”
So she did love him, in some way. This was good news, albeit not as surprising as it felt. I just needed to figure out what she wanted from him, maybe I could convince him to do it, or to at least, meet her halfway. It was his only chance.
“Fine, what must I do?”
“Well, for starters... Give the boy’s body back to him.” I felt another rush of excitement. That task was easy; he had never taken my body away from me in the first place. We had never once been separated as two different entities, we were always—mostly—aware of each other. Save for when I got loaded, like tonight. “She and I cannot love you if you do not set him free. He is your vessel for a reason, there are things you must learn from him and he will help you grow. He understands your torment even better than I, and only together, you may save each other.”
I only wished Hades was conscious enough to hear this lecture, it might do him some good. But I knew what my God would say at this moment, “he is weak.” That was Hades’ answer to anything involving me.
“Because you smother him.”
“And your girl?” I wanted to know if Valentina was safe, if Persephone wasn’t smothering her too in her rage. I hoped not, I didn’t want anything bad to happen to Val.
“She will be here when you return, and hopefully you return as Griffin.” If only she knew. I ground my teeth, hoping to appear disapproving before nodding my head.
“I’ll think about it.” I practiced my smirk for her before turning toward the door. I paused only for a second, Valentina still lingering on my mind. I wanted her to know I was on her side, that I would do anything to keep her safe. So I turned back, buzzing with passion and grabbed her face between my rough hands, leaning in to kiss her.
It was a different kiss from our first time, I wanted so desperately to convey all the complicated things I felt for her with my lips. I hoped she would hear the song of my soul, crying out for her in the way my lips bruised hers.
When I finally pulled away from her, I felt distress scratching at the back of my mind. It didn’t belong to me, but to the God our lips touching had evoked. I felt the tug as he drew me into the shadows and retook control.
“I missed you terribly, my wife.” It was all he said, and for his credit, Hades turned and left the room, returning to the dark hallway of the Underworld with no destination in mind.
He returned control to me with a shudder and I grabbed ahold of the rocky wall to my left for support as I stood there for a moment. I was relieved Persephone hadn’t known it was me. However, I couldn’t help but feel that wasn’t entirely a good thing. Hades and I were becoming interchangeable and I wasn’t sure how I liked that. On the other hand, I was excited by the prospect that Persephone hadn’t completely written her husband off.
As far as I could tell, she still had a small flame burning for him. So long as he didn’t do anything else to completely stamp it out—especially with my help—we might still convince our wife to love us again.
I shook my head in amazement, unable to fully believe myself when I thought things like “our wife”. When had I ever wanted something like a wife? I had never even had a steady girlfriend, let alone looked for something as permanent as matrimony.
Straightening myself out, I tucked both hands into the pockets of my jeans and began walking. I remained amazed that there was even a part of me that was pushing for this. I didn’t know if I was doing it for Hades, knowing he needed his wife, or if I was doing it for myself, knowing how I felt about Valentina.
Chapter 5
Olympus proved itself to be difficult to navigate alone. The other Gods meshed easier, even Savannah, who had begun as an outcast, was still invited to parties, despite how people felt about her. I was, instead, a pariah. It wasn’t anything new. I couldn’t remember the last time I had a solid friendship that didn’t involve using each other for something. Unless I held an intrinsic value, I was as worthless as I’d been upon leaving my mother’s womb.
The hallway emerged at the edge of a cliff face, overhanging the River Styx. I looked down at my subjects, screaming for mercy and begging for release. But this
was only the beginning of their journey, they would come out where the rivers merged and go to their judgment. Hades didn’t deal with everyone who came through; it was only the cases that were beyond the judgment of the three judges. That made it easier for me to take my time returning to the throne, so far from where the other Gods lived.
Atlas assured me that once he thought I was ready, he would bring me there and I would fully unite with Hades. But I wasn’t sure how much more I might unite with my God. We seemingly had become one in the same.
Fishing a coin out of my pocket, I threw it into the river as payment, watching the fog roll in as Charon chased it. The ferryman paused at the base of my overhang, and I took a moment, gripping the edge of the rock, before launching myself down into the boat. It didn’t even register the force of my weight as Charon waited for me to sit, before taking off down the river. He didn’t need to know where I wanted to go, he would deliver me as he did all the other souls who brought payment.
My actions felt natural, knowing where I was going and what I was doing. Surely, this was a sign of the unity between Hades and myself. I reaped information from his mind to survive in this world, where naturally I knew nothing. This was my home now, the realm into which I had been cast. It reflected all the gritty parts of me, I longed to reject. The foreboding impression of the looming valley walls, created along the riverbanks, would frighten even the toughest of men. This was not a place for the faint-hearted.
It was asphyxiating, with the heavy smell of decay hanging in the air. It climbed through your nostrils and crawled down your throat, enlivening an itch that became almost unbearable, the deeper into the world you got. The boat slithered along the streams of souls, weightlessly carrying itself on the power of their shrieks and shrills. The boat edged nearer to the shore, where the three rivers met, the waters growing more turbulent now, as more energy rushed us to the coast. Iron gates were waiting for us at the finish line, decorated with skulls and faces of anguish. There was an oppressive, repellant, air to the gates, clouding my judgment with resistance.
Why was I here?
Why had I come?
What was I doing?
Panic, rose like bile in my throat, and I wanted to turn back and leave this place to its derelict. But, I belonged here. The ferryman, he was my companion; the souls of the river, they were my friends in anguish; the skulls of the gate, they were the statement of my own abysmal existence. I pushed back against the natural, mortal, desire, to fight this place. It was home, however unwelcome it made me feel.
I knew I belonged here, as much as Hades did. It reflected the tar of our soul. No doubt the insidious nature of Hades had conjured it. The same sinister personality that led him to kidnap Persephone twice, plot against his own brother countless times, stomach the torment of humans, and take pleasure in the chaos he manifested. And deep down, I knew I shared these things with him.
Grace of Gods Boxset: Reincarnated Greek Gods YA/NA Series Page 50